Sorry for Partying. That phrase has become synonymous with one of the most explosive Tight Ends to hit the NFL in recent years and though the media makes it sound like fun, we fantasy owners are not amused. Whether it’s having a shirtless dance off after the Super Bowl, hooking up with a Lolita in Aruba or whatever it is he’s doing here, Rob Gronkowski has always been one to take life not too seriously and has some major meat-head tendencies. Not that the NFL hasn’t had meat heads in the past that we all loved to laugh along with. I mean, Brian Bosworth is still making movies to this day with just the same amount of box office success as when he was in his prime. I mean, take a look at Boz’s Revelation Road. It came out in 2013. It’s also streamable on Netflix in 2013. PS, we’re still in April of 2013. As long as you’re not a meat head yourself, the math is pretty basic on how bad of a film that is. All this to say, this meat head lifestyle can work out just fine. But notice I’m not talking about on field exploits here? Exactly my point: sorry for partying isn’t gonna cut it if Rob is sidelined after rumors of another surgery is needed on his left forearm. This surgery would be #4, BTW. There have been infection issues up to this point and now the word is that the healing process on the bones has been ‘non-union’. No word yet on if they’ve tried having these surgeries outside of Wisconsin. But more to the point, whether it’s fair or not, these off field excursions have to make fantasy owners a little worried about a full dedication to his health. If you’re gonna draft a guy in the top 20, you kinda want to have faith that he’ll rehab from surgery correctly and be ready to start the season, no? Rhetorical. Of COURSE you do. The key thing here is that Rob is of a special class of TE, the rare ‘set it and forget it’ type that we all love but we might not have that from him for the 2013 Fantasy Football season and this scares us all greatly. Sorry for partying indeed, Mr. Gronk. If there is yet another surgery and the infection lingers, owners might wanna shy away from Rob for this season in redraft leagues unless he goes low enough. In other news for fantasy football…
Chris Ivory – Signed his tender offer with the Saints after a weekend full of rumors regarding signing with the Jets and trade rumors still circulating regarding the Saints 4th string running back. This is a running back that is a must own if he’s a starter but in that shizz show backfield, he’s now just a must monitor. Ugh, the Saints are like that dude at the party who keeps all the hot chicks strung along all night, leaving the rest of us to fight over the one that has the most teeth. Though I’m sure PETA will have this site shut down for saying it, I really do hope some team poaches Ivory from the Gulf Coast.
Darrelle Revis – The rumors surrounding Ivory have a direct correlation to Revis’ move to the Bucs, so long as twitter isn’t lying. And why would it, twitter never lies. Isn’t that right, Lennay Kekua? Revis goes to Tampa Bay for a slew of picks pending physical. This might drop late in the evening and I might miss my chance to write about Chris if he goes to the Jets for one of those aforementioned picks. If you reeaaaallly wanna read about him right now, I’ll give you my Chris Ivory sleeper post from 2012 to assuage your needs. Consider yourself assuaged!
In other news, the NFL schedule came out last Thursday night and people got all hot and bothered. Now I do think there’s some merit to reviewing these types of things. There are perennial losers and perennial winners. But no one had the Denver Broncos defense ranked particularly high last year and they finished as the 3rd best fantasy defense according to yahoo. The reality is, you can have all the talent in the world on the defensive side but the coach is what makes the parts work. The Detroit Lions should be better on defense. They’re not. They’re undisciplined and that stems directly from a head coach who gets into altercations over getting slapped on the back too hard. The reality is, we don’t know what we’re going to get defensively in 2013 even from the Chicago Bears who’ve had a head coach change over the off-season. So for those of you who like to hang your hats on ‘he’s got a great playoff schedule’, it’s a little early to make that call and it’s also a bit of bull to pretend we know what a team in April will look like defensively in December. Sorry, not a road I’m gonna follow you down, folks. With that, get back to work. It’s Monday and you’re already slacking. Not a good sign.