Author: Jay

Jay is a longtime Razzball everything who consumes an egregious amount of Makers Mark as a vehicle to gain wisdom and augment his natural glow. Living in the D.C. area, he also likes spending time visiting the local parks and feeding lettuce to any turtles he encounters, including Mitch McConnell. You can follow him on Twitter @jaywrong.

Read some of Jay's 685 posts

2016 Rankings: Defense & Special Teams

May 19, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, 2016 Rankings | 2 Comments

by: Jay

Dynasty Rankings: Top-150 | QB | RB | WR | TE | Top-50 Rookies

Year	Accuracy	Rank	High	Low	Percentile
2015	57.5%	22 out of 123	59.9%	51.6%	Top 20%
2014	58.1%	31 out of 125	60.7%	50.6%	Top 25%

When planning the rankings release schedule, getting rid of the Kickers and DST rankings as fast as possible is a priority for me. They are just soooo the opposite of what you really need to care about, that even implementing a strategy seems like a waste. Trust me, that time and energy is better spent elsewhere. Like Redtube. Or volunteering at your local shelter. Or doing both at the same time. All scholarly pursuits in my honest opinion. Regardless, defense is still a category that you must adhere to, and leaving it off the rankings would seem like a missing tooth. Pittsburgh knows what I’m talking about…

Despite how irrelevant I think DST AND Kicker’s are, it’s still a position, and this being ‘rankings’ time, we must go forth and use a numerical system to place these defense’s in order. Take out your knives and let us argue over everything henceforth!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

2016 Rankings: Kickers

May 17, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, 2016 Rankings |

by: Jay

Dynasty Rankings: Top-150 | QB | RB | WR | TE | Top-50 Rookies

Year	Accuracy	Rank	High	Low	Percentile
2015	57.5%	22 out of 123	59.9%	51.6%	Top 20%
2014	58.1%	31 out of 125	60.7%	50.6%	Top 25%

A lot of people come to me and ask “How should I go about drafting a kicker?”. And I respond, “Really bro, that’s what you want to talk about?” Actually, not really. None of that ever happens, and there’s a good reason for that. First, I’m always in my mom’s basement, so no one really comes up to me to ask about anything. Secondly, no one actually cares about kickers. Okay, okay, there are *some* people who draft kickers for one reason or another, but all those reasons are wrong. The Razzball approved strategy here is: Don’t be that guy you know. Which I guess is the opposite of Velveeta’s slogan. We aim high here folks. Look, they are what they are, and that’s a low-tier position on the totem pole of fantasy football. And that’s no joke, because the totem pole exists. Somewhere in New Mexico, with the face of Roger Goodell and Cobra Commander. Hail HYDRA!, amiright? Anyhow, let’s go over a few things about this position (that’s what she said), and then rank-o-rama starts. Prepare your alcoholic beverages…

Despite how irrelevant I think the position is, it still is a position, and this being ‘rankings’ time, we must go forth and use a numerical system to place these kickers in order. And then have a knife fight right afterwards. Sounds exciting, right? Probably just the knives part…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

2016 Rankings: Quarterbacks

May 12, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, 2016 Rankings | 18 Comments

by: Jay

Dynasty Rankings: Top-150 | QB | RB | WR | TE | Top-50 Rookies

Year	Accuracy	Rank	High	Low	Percentile
2015	57.5%	22 out of 123	59.9%	51.6%	Top 20%
2014	58.1%	31 out of 125	60.7%	50.6%	Top 25%

Welcome to the first installation of what is to be our 2016 Fantasy Football Rankings! It’s such a big deal, we have to capitalize the whole shebang. Just like your mother. Because, you know, shebangs. Regardless, as you can see right above my lovely remarks about your mother, we’ve had some pretty good success with our “ranking accuracy” the past couple of years. To be totally honest, the past two years, Razzball’s priority with rankings has been consistency, not necessarily a high-risk/high-reward strategy. And I think it shows and I think it’s the better path. Don’t worry, I’m patting myself on the back as I’m typing this, which you might thing is hard, but I’m pretty sure elbows weren’t really created for any other reason than to do this one thing. Any ways, now that the self-aggrandizing part is completed, I have to state, the quarterback position has gotten increasingly… meh. You have basically a mish-mash of top-5 or top-6 guys that you’d all be happy having, and then a whole bunch of interchangeable pieces until you get around to the point where it doesn’t matter anymore. I call that the Andy Dalton zone, or what is essentially the “gingerzone”. Which, come to think of it, would probably be a great 80’s hairband name. Regardless, here are your 2016 Quarterback Rankings, with the added bonus of Mark Sanchez. You know you want some of that nacho…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The 2016 Fantasy Football Rankings are Coming

May 10, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, Fantasy Football Daily Notes | 7 Comments

by: Jay

What this post presupposes is, what if we aren’t Game of Thrones? We all know winter is coming. Or wait, isn’t it here already? I feel like it is, but it kinda makes you wonder, like, what are the White Walkers actually up to right now? Furthermore, what have they been up to the last six years… honestly. Look, this site mixes fantasy football with Game of Thrones like nothing I’ve ever seen before (kinda like discovering a new genre of porn), but the more and more I think about it, shouldn’t winter have overrun the entirety of Westeros? Like, are they just at home watching reruns of Daredevil? Perhaps doing a little gardening? Spring winter cleaning? Regardless, as has been stated in the title, the time to release rankings for the 2016 Fantasy Football season has arrived. Here’s how it’ll all play out, just so you plan your life accordingly!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Podcast: Game of Thrones, S6:E1 – The Red Woman

April 28, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, 2016 Game of Thrones, Fantasy Football Podcast |

by: Jay

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As we can afford during the football offseason (and eternal search for SEO hits), an entire podcast dedicated to Game of Thrones is definitely the hero we need, not the one we deserve. And now that the new GoT season is here, we can rest the hype-machine and finally talk about an actual episode. But with the special guest Grey Albright in tow, we just sorta-kinda talk about Canada, Drake, and riding segues (segways?) with Nick Capozzi. THEN we get to the season premier and go over all the plot points introduced (or recycled), have some meta-conversations of where the series is going from both the show-watcher and book-reader standpoint. Which was Tehol’s job. I’ve never read the books, so I have no idea if he did a good job, but if I know anything about Tehol, I’m sure it was… yeah… nevermind. Regardless, join Grey, myself and Tehol as we discuss the first episode: The Red Woman! (And there will be spoilers…)

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Podcast: The NFL Draft

April 18, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, Fantasy Football Podcast | 1 Comment

by: Jay

Tehol and I are finally back to prep you on the ins and outs of the NFL Draft. To be fair, I’m not sure about what that means technically, like the NFL Draft is some sort of object that you can be inside and out… this whole thing seems entirely too meta at the moment, but them’s the way it goes. Or I’ve been drinking. OR BOTH! We do go over the big trade between the Rams and Titans, a bunch of fantasy prospects in the draft, and then I ramble for an hour about something. I think it was a Tehol story. Or it was about the Chargers. Who even knows any more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Luck Be A Colty Tonight

April 14, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, Fantasy Football Daily Notes | 2 Comments

by: Jay

Breaking: The Rams have just traded for the first overall pick from the Titans for picks 15, 43, 45, 76 and a 2017 first round and third round pick. Holy sh*tballs that’s a lot of stuff. But look on the bright side, Robert Griffin can’t be drafted twice… (right?) There are a lot of repercussions, and an interesting storyline at work here (a reverse RG-III trade, if you will). My first instinct is, wow, that’s pretty expensive. My second instinct is, if this doesn’t work out, the Rams probably have another solid decade of mediocrity ahead for them. And thirdly… say what you want about the Rams, but they sure knew how to build a defense, mostly with the bundled picks they received from Washington several years ago. Then again, they haven’t really done much without a quarterback, something that high draft positions certainly allow for, and this seems to be their response. Zach will be analyzing the trade more in-depth later today, so stay tuned! All I’ll say is, you do some crazy things sometimes when playing with house money. Seems apt here… Now, back to your regularly scheduled program!

We’re about to jump back into the “Early Rankings” next week, but for now, we do have some leftovers to take care of. Nothing too big has happened (that’s what she said) since our free agency-focused podcast was released, but there are a number of smaller news items that are there for consumption. Mainly because I’m hungry. You can tell because I used the words “leftovers” and “consumption” in the same sentence. I should also add that I’m sleepy. These represent my normal life-state, I think. Regardless, if your biggest wish is to get Razzball’s take on the NFL’s recent day-to-day minutiae, I am here to grant that wish. And to also state that you need to make a better wish. I mean, seriously… I can probably name at least twenty-eight wishes off the top of my head that are better than this one, and they all involve 1990’s Rachel Weisz. They also include 2000’s Rachel Weisz. In fact, the entire epoch of Rachel Weisz is included here…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Podcast: The Official Razzball Game of Thrones Pod Debut

March 31, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, 2016 Game of Thrones, Fantasy Football Podcast | 2 Comments

by: Jay

Did you know winter is finally here? Well, I mean, it’s spring time, but for some reason, HBO decides to start airing a winter show on the cusp of summer, but whatevs. The world is not perfect. And come to think of it, I’m pretty sure there are only two seasons in Game of Thrones: Alaska and Siberia. That’s it. Two seasons. Regardless, I’m happy to present Razzball’s answer to the SEO gods, a GoT podcast that’ll be weekly once the season begins. Basically because the football season is still far away, which means we can do random clickbait in the mean time. We’ll also have Grey (mustache clickbait!) and “GoT name expert” and former Fantasy Football IDP contributor Kevin Kumpf stop by for this short series as much as possible (with Grey coming by to join us for the season premier), but for our podcast debut, Tehol and I go over the newest red band trailer that you can watch above (quite possibly NSFW), and discuss the possibility of a Clegenebowl, the level of awesome Davos has achieved, how to pronounce Melisandre, and when in the world will Daenerys ever get to Kings Landing… (the answer is quite possibly never.) Game of Thrones hasn’t started yet, but the hype is here. Join us!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Podcast: NFL Free Agency Round Up

March 29, 2016 | 2016 Fantasy Football, Fantasy Football Podcast |

by: Jay

We’re back! That’s right folks, it’s time to wipe the dust off the Razzball Football side with the first podcast of the year. I would have used an exclamation point there, but with the way I’m feeling, some restraint might be wise or you would probably recite this entire post as if it were yelling. WHICH I GUESS WOULDN’T BE THE WORST THING IN THE WORLD. Regardless, the great and mighty (his bedroom moniker) Tehol returned to his normal co-hosting duties (duties… also a bedroom moniker of his that you can ask him about) to discuss the happenings of NFL free agency, including the signing of Robert Griffen, Calvin Johnson and Peyton Manning’s retirements (and the fall out from these events) and other transactions that have taken place.

And for those of you who miss our Game of Thrones content, have no fear, we’ll be doing a separate Pod for the show this offseason, and our first episode will be out Thursday when we talk about the new red band trailer and what it all means… The meaning of life, maaaaan.

So stick around for the resurgence of Football Razzball, in audio form!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Rankings, Championship Weekend

January 21, 2016 | 2015 Fantasy Football, 2015 Weekly Rankings | 2 Comments

by: Jay

Period	Accuracy	Rank	High	Low	Percentile
Week 16	63.3%	26 out of 124	66.3%	47.1%	Top 20%
Week 15	56.9%	13 out of 127	62.7%	41.9%	Top 10%
Week 14	55.1%	26 out of 126	60.3%	44.0%	Top 20%
Week 13	57.2%	82 out of 126	65.2%	47.2%	Top 65%
Week 12	62.2%	20 out of 126	65.9%	47.3%	Top 20%
Week 11	54.8%	46 out of 128	63.7%	39.0%	Top 40%
Week 10	56.0%	85 out of 128	65.5%	48.7%	Top 70%
Week 9	61.2%	34 out of 130	67.9%	48.1%	Top 30%
Week 8	56.7%	30 out of 128	66.5%	42.9%	Top 25%
Week 7	57.8%	37 out of 129	66.8%	43.1%	Top 30%
Week 6	54.0%	84 out of 131	65.2%	45.7%	Top 65%
Week 5	54.4%	37 out of 130	59.7%	41.9%	Top 30%
Week 4	56.4%	12 out of 135	59.9%	41.1%	Top 10%
Week 3	59.1%	18 out of 134	65.0%	42.1%	Top 15%
Week 2	53.4%	85 out of 135	65.2%	46.2%	Top 65%
Week 1	56.8%	54 out of 137	62.8%	46.3%	Top 40%
2015	57.5%	22 out of 123	59.9%	51.6%	Top 20%
2014	58.1%	31 out of 125	60.7%	50.6%	Top 25%

Here are your Championship Rankings…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Rankings, Divisional Weekend

January 14, 2016 | 2015 Fantasy Football, 2015 Weekly Rankings | 10 Comments

by: Jay

Period	Accuracy	Rank	High	Low	Percentile
Week 16	63.3%	26 out of 124	66.3%	47.1%	Top 20%
Week 15	56.9%	13 out of 127	62.7%	41.9%	Top 10%
Week 14	55.1%	26 out of 126	60.3%	44.0%	Top 20%
Week 13	57.2%	82 out of 126	65.2%	47.2%	Top 65%
Week 12	62.2%	20 out of 126	65.9%	47.3%	Top 20%
Week 11	54.8%	46 out of 128	63.7%	39.0%	Top 40%
Week 10	56.0%	85 out of 128	65.5%	48.7%	Top 70%
Week 9	61.2%	34 out of 130	67.9%	48.1%	Top 30%
Week 8	56.7%	30 out of 128	66.5%	42.9%	Top 25%
Week 7	57.8%	37 out of 129	66.8%	43.1%	Top 30%
Week 6	54.0%	84 out of 131	65.2%	45.7%	Top 65%
Week 5	54.4%	37 out of 130	59.7%	41.9%	Top 30%
Week 4	56.4%	12 out of 135	59.9%	41.1%	Top 10%
Week 3	59.1%	18 out of 134	65.0%	42.1%	Top 15%
Week 2	53.4%	85 out of 135	65.2%	46.2%	Top 65%
Week 1	56.8%	54 out of 137	62.8%	46.3%	Top 40%
2015	57.5%	22 out of 123	59.9%	51.6%	Top 20%
2014	58.1%	31 out of 125	60.7%	50.6%	Top 25%

Here are your Division Weekend Rankings…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Rankings, Wild Card Weekend

January 7, 2016 | 2015 Fantasy Football, 2015 Weekly Rankings | 35 Comments

by: Jay

Period	Accuracy	Rank	High	Low	Percentile
Week 16	63.3%	26 out of 124	66.3%	47.1%	Top 20%
Week 15	56.9%	13 out of 127	62.7%	41.9%	Top 10%
Week 14	55.1%	26 out of 126	60.3%	44.0%	Top 20%
Week 13	57.2%	82 out of 126	65.2%	47.2%	Top 65%
Week 12	62.2%	20 out of 126	65.9%	47.3%	Top 20%
Week 11	54.8%	46 out of 128	63.7%	39.0%	Top 40%
Week 10	56.0%	85 out of 128	65.5%	48.7%	Top 70%
Week 9	61.2%	34 out of 130	67.9%	48.1%	Top 30%
Week 8	56.7%	30 out of 128	66.5%	42.9%	Top 25%
Week 7	57.8%	37 out of 129	66.8%	43.1%	Top 30%
Week 6	54.0%	84 out of 131	65.2%	45.7%	Top 65%
Week 5	54.4%	37 out of 130	59.7%	41.9%	Top 30%
Week 4	56.4%	12 out of 135	59.9%	41.1%	Top 10%
Week 3	59.1%	18 out of 134	65.0%	42.1%	Top 15%
Week 2	53.4%	85 out of 135	65.2%	46.2%	Top 65%
Week 1	56.8%	54 out of 137	62.8%	46.3%	Top 40%
2015	57.5%	22 out of 123	59.9%	51.6%	Top 20%
2014	58.1%	31 out of 125	60.7%	50.6%	Top 25%

Here are your Wild Card Weekend Rankings and FanDuel Week 17 Cheatsheet…

Please, blog, may I have some more?