NBC asked Obama to speak last night just so sports fans would switch to the NBC Sports Network for the first time ever. Also, judging from the timeslot, I’m guessing the President didn’t have any of the Patriots or Niners on his fantasy team. I think we’ve had a rough couple of days, as a nation, so I will only bring up two points– First, watching all the news, hearing all their names, listening to the speeches… it’s been the opposite of fun. And secondly, I think my ceiling fan was making my eyes water. Maybe kicking up some dust-mites? Now, let’s get back to talking about football!

I previously called this game Waterworld, due to all the rain. I am now referring to this game as ‘New Year’s Eve’, because everyone dropped the ball. What was the rain made out of? KY Jelly? Wait, wait, is it too late to call it the Boston Turnover Party?

Here was my drinking game of choice last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Oh, hello. I didn’t see you there. That’s because this is the internet and you’re not in my house. I hope. If you don’t remember me, I’m your replacement referee of football razzball magic, here to enchant your naval in mysterious ways on what is to be a splendid Columbus day.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

So yeah, it seemed so long ago that we christened our relationship at the beginning of the football season, talking about Romoception’s and getting Olgetree’d. Those were the days, were they not? While I did lay down a schedule for my readership that did not come to fruition– covering the MNF and TNF games, I soon realized that I had no readership to speak of, so I’m pretty sure you have no idea who I am or why you would care.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

So this is it folks, the official beginning of the foos-ball season. During this 17 week period of glory, grit, and players struggling to say their own names during the offense and defense line-up presentations because the lack of a 4th grade reading level in the sport, I will be bringing you recaps of both the Monday Night and Thursday Night Football game’s.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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