I was reflecting back on my 2015 Fantasy Football season and I started to sob a bit. I know it sounds ridiculous, but before you pass judgment, they were tears of joy because Fantasy Baseball is right around the corner. Now, you might be wondering why I bring this up and I’m not even sure why. Oh, yeah, it’s because this year’s 2015 Razzball Commenter Grand Champion and the winner of a $150 Best Buy gift card and a Razzball T-Shirt is actually a Razzballer I know from the baseball side of the site…Please, blog, may I have some more?
One playoff week down, two more to go. Are you guys as excited as I am… for Christmas! I lost every playoff match-up except one, so I’m not feeling football right now. By the way, speaking of Christmas, I just got back from my daughter’s Christmas, I mean “Holiday” program. I never thought it was possible, but they found a way to take the cute out of Christmas… again. Seriously, it was the most pretentious ball of blah that was only topped by last year’s snooze-fest that featured the “In A Gadda Da Vida” of Christmas songs. Sorry, I had to get that off my chest. But really though, it was worst than taking an elite running back in the first round this year. Oh wait, I either took Antonio Brown or ODB in the first round of every draft (one league was a shameful auto draft). As I did last week, I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that we are still writing five days a week on the baseball side, and with January Grey right around the corner, you need to get over there where the party literally never stops. The daily words of wisdom by Grey and people talking about their keepers and dynasty leagues keeps enough buttons open on the blouse that any real fantasy baseball fan must take a peek. Don’t forget, we should be launching the RCL’s over there in February. Now that I got that out of the way, let’s get to the ranks and where you can see your name in hyper link!Please, blog, may I have some more?
Last time I wrote this, I was pissed we still had seven undefeated teams. Well, that was the week before Thanksgiving and I was five pounds lighter. I’m happy to say we now have zero undefeated teams and my hater side gets a double shot of satisfaction. Why you so hateful FOH? Because if life was all about happy, then it wouldn’t be the journey it’s suppose to be. Now, for those of you in the RCL or any league with any sense, the playoffs started this week. Playoffs? You want to talk about Playoffs? . Yeah, I went there with the insertion of an “overused but yet never gets old” Mora clip… and I got to use the word “insertion” in a post. Hehe! This is the best part of the Fantasy Football season. I don’t get crazy over the week-in and week-out part of this game. I just try to make sure I make the playoffs. I made it in four of five leagues *high fives self* this year with my one whiff in the writers league. That bums me out since I think I have a strong team right now and scored more points than three of the teams in the playoffs. Whatevs, that’s the Fantasy Football life. Only three-and-half months until baseball starts and the daily musings of this guy. Wait a minute, why wait til’ Spring? He and Mike are chopping it up every day right now on the baseball side. If you didn’t do well in the RCL football leagues this year, you can always redeem yourself in the OG RCL’s! Sorry, I must apologize, I have been digesting 100 times more fantasy baseball than football lately. Two crazy dynasties and my off season work with the Big Magoo has me in Spring Training already. Anythehoo, on to the standings…Please, blog, may I have some more?
So I’m back up in the game
Running things to keep my swing
Letting all the people know
That I’m back to run the show
The return of the
Mack Me! I actually don’t really run anything here, hell not even in my own house, but in my car, I’m the boss! We all need theme music when we walk in a room, I would like to say mine is “Return of the Mack”, but I ain’t that cool. It would probably be more like this jam. Okay, that is a cool jam too, but the title says a lot about me. Speaking of jams, has anyone heard the new Logic album? It’s not as good as his last album, but has some damn good cuts on it like this one. What’s that? You never heard his last album? Well here is my favorite cut. If this is all too much for you, or you need me to rewind even further back, and maybe you are a fan of 90’s era rap, then check this one out. *counts hyper-links* Okay, I think I have reached my “Jay hates all my hyperlinks” threshold. Speaking of Jay, how ’bout them Chargers. Low blow jack-a**. Yes, that is me talking to myself but my other personality doesn’t see it that way. Sorry, Jay, better luck next year! Wait, I’m here to do an update. Let’s get to it… I know you all like that I talk about you.
What you will see below are the results of the 2014 Razzball Writer’s League Fantasy Football Draft (click here for the results). The league is based on this year’s RCL format. If you don’t know what a RCL is, man, you are behind the times. Join here for a chance at prizes and glorious bragging rights! The RCL stuff is basically as follows: The 0.5 PPR league is comprised of 12 teams each starting a QB, three WRs, two RBs, one TE, a FLEX, K, and a Defense. If you are interested, go ahead and rank the teams in the comments section below. You can also tell us the reason for your order. Or, you can just tell us how you feel about Tehol’s team. Spoiler: I couldn’t find Matt Wieters anywhere on the roster, so I’m not sure Tehol really drafted.Please, blog, may I have some more?
So, as you may know, or not know, and for those of you who do not know what I know that you know about what we both don’t know… uh, my computer just turned off. But, as I was saying,while having a stroke I guess, I don’t like calling myself an “expert”. Unless we are talking about browsing Redtube.com. I can do that for days. But in terms of fantasy sports, I prefer to just call myself a “writer”. A glorious and complicated descriptor, I’m sure. I have to say though, there are fantasy football experts out there, they do exist. How do I know this? Because that’s what they call themselves, and that’s okay! It’s not like they give degrees out for this stuff (though, they really should have so I would have payed a lot more attention in college…), so it is what it is. And this season, I was invited to take part in an experts league, (which I’m sure will be a surprise if you don’t read post title’s), called “The Fantasy Legends League“. Surprise! And how did your very own Jay do? Follow me after the jump to find out!Please, blog, may I have some more?
I hath arrived, my children! Wait, where are the doves? I told you I wanted to come back to the releasing of doves like I was on a John Woo set, Jay, and all I see are bread crumbs and a bunch of pigeons. I get it, we’re a little more low budget here than the Razzball Baseball side of things but it’s bad enough you couldn’t take the brown M&M’s out of the bowl before taking them to my trailer. And speaking of trailer, where did this rust bucket come from? Like, did you buy this off some yokel from West Virginia? Smells like someone’s been cooking meth in here…but I guess I’m already on set so enough with the complaining. Though I DO expect at least a cheese plate at this point, thank you very much. Anyways, the last time I was around these parts, I was saying my sad and tearful goodbyes as the lead writer over here but did promise I’d be back in the Fall. Well, if you can have Christmas in July, why can’t you have Fall there too, right? And while we’re on the topic, this is a shout out to my family members that always ask why I’m not coming to see you in the dead of winter. Oh, I don’t know, because you live in a snowy part of Idaho and want me to drive 9 hours during the worst time of the year to travel to do it? I can say Merry Xmas over the phone. Heck, we could even Skype if you really wanna see my scruffy mug. Next year, we’re all having Thanksgiving, Christmas & New Years over a vacation week in the middle of July. That way the only car wrecks will happen in the parking lot when Grandma tries to drive and get yet another 5th of Jack. Heart you, Grandma…but enough of this, you don’t even know what a Scott Fish Bowl is and we’re over 300 words in so lets get started. Here’s my Scott Fish Bowl team for the 2014 Fantasy Football season…Please, blog, may I have some more?
Every story is told through only one set of eyes. I mean, I could talk to you like I was our league champion @Chad_Scott13 and how I played my way to a championship. Yeah, that’d be nice. I could talk about all the great players that led me to the gold and how my huge pecs glisten in the sun as I lay on the white, sandy beaches off the coast of the Caribbean while watching a topless volleyball tournament unfold and the winning team gets to kiss the freshly inked @DangeRussWilson tattoo on my nether regions. And they say RW3 isn’t 6’…but alas, I can’t live that life and have to talk about my team. So here’s a look at what went right, what went wrong, and what hung slightly to the left in my Razzball Experts League team for 2013 Fantasy Football…Please, blog, may I have some more?
So here’s my final go in another Expert League. Scott Pianowski must really like
my money the way I play this game as it’s the second league I’ll be in with hm. I covered the first one here. I drafted before the Baseball All-Star break then. For the most part, this league is similar in set up except that it’s a 12 teamer rather than a 14. I do also think there are some similar owners but, hey, that would require me to pay attention to other owners. Neverthewho, here’s results for my last draft for 2013 Fantasy Football…
I apologize if my tone and voice change by the time you read this whole piece. I’m writing this here lead paragraph before this league has even drafted because I’m gonna link to all these Fantasy Football peeps via their twitter handles. Seeing as I don’t do much advertising of who I follow in the tweety world, consider this a small dosing of it. If all goes well, I’ll keep this bubbly persona throughout but if I have a draft disaster – or a draftaster if you will – I might go full Eeyore up in this mo’fo. But before I go from smug jerk to morose jackass, let’s cover who all was in this little draft of ours.Please, blog, may I have some more?