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It was an exciting opening week for the NFL and we fantasy baller’s are either twerking in celebration or connecting the garden hose to the Tauraus’ tailpipe. It’s probably a little early in the season to do either. Besides, this could happen when the twerk goes wrong. There were plenty of surprises opening Sunday. There were three safties in the first 20 minutes, Jacksonville scored a total of two points all day and Bruno Mars was named the Super Bowl half time performer. Bruno Mars?? I’d rather see another Janet Jackson “wardrobe malfuction.”  Mmmm…boobies. Who would have thought that Terrelle Pryor would outscore Dree Brees or that Megatron, Dez Bryant and David Wilson would combine for less points than Jerome Simpson? While we are sharing our fantasy blues, Tom Brady looked like Jack Nicholson trying to teach the inmates how to play basketball in One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest with that crew of wideouts not named Amendola or Edleman in New England. Hit me, Chief, I got the moves! If that happens again your humble-but-nonetheless-handsome Guru is retiring and taking up Fantasy Basket Weaving. Come to think of it, that may also be a better sport for Tim Tebow.

So, while it may not be all unicorns and rainbows on your fake football team, there’s plenty of magic and madness awaiting us Razzballer’s on the waiver wire. It’s time to jam it or cram it.

 

Jam or Cram: Terrelle Pryor, QB, Oakland Raiders

Availability: 89% Yahoo, 92% ESPN

Stat Me Up: Pryor threw for 217 yards, one touchdown, and two interceptions while rushing 112 yards. That was good for 20 points in most leagues.

$$$ Value: $4. I’m Scrooge McDuck with my fantasy $$, unless it’s a RB or a guy with some surefire potential. Pryor may be the latter.

The Gist: While Pryor was facing a porous Indy defense, he was also pretty accurate (19-of-29) and burned them all day on the ground.

The X-File: Raiders HC Dennis Allen confirmed Pryor will be the team’s starting quarterback going forward. Damn, I was hoping the Snake was making a comeback.

Jam it or Cram it: Pryor gets the Jagoffs this week and is a solid streamer and a definite play in 2-QB leagues. He’s the poor man’s Cam Newton. JAM

 

Jam or Cram: Joique Bell, RB, Detroit Lions

Availability: 67% Yahoo, 30% ESPN

Stat Me Up: Bell had six carries for 25 rushing yards and two touchdowns, as well as five catches for 67 yards on six targets.

$$$ Value: $4. Don’t go blowing all your cash in your first minute in the champagne room, guys. There’ll be something prettier later.

The Gist: Hey, Joique went all big game Bell on Sunday with over 20 fantasy points. But let’s not ask him to move in after just one date. Bell has talent and could be worth handcuffing if you own Reggie Bush and are into the whole fantasy bondage thing. Bring out the Gimp.

X-File: Bell’s TD’s came after two Reggie Bush scores were called back.

Jam it or Cram it: Bell is a worthy flex play, but it’s a bit of a gamble. He’s out there for the taking in Y! Leagues and being picked up fast — especially with Bush having a thumb and a groin issue. Coincidently, last week’s edition of Marta Stewart Living was also the “Thumb and Groin” issue. JAM

 

Jam or Cram: Brian Hartline, WR, Miami Dolphins

Availability: 55% Yahoo, 81% ESPN

Stat Me Up: Hartline had nine catches on 15 targets for 114 yards and a touchdown.

$$$ Value: $4. I’d pay a little more than the opening $2 value for a guy that’s going to see the ball. A lot.

The Gist: This is no surprise if you’ve been reading Sir Sky. He’s had a Hartline in his pants since July. And with good reason. Hartline has hands, runs good routes and Ryan Tannehill actually trusts him to catch the ball. The same can’t be said about Mike Wallace who caught one pass last week and doesn’t seem to be on script with Tannehill. I’ve seen better chemistry on Breaking Bad.

X-File: Hartline hauled in 74 catches for 1083 yards last season and scored more fantasy points than Larry Fitzgerald, Dwayne Bowe and Pierre Garçon.

Jam it or Cram it: Hartline has another tasty matchup this weekend at Indianapolis. Hartline won’t total over 20 points every week, but he is a real solid WR3. With Wallace getting all the fantasy love, make Hartline your Valentine. JAM

 

Jam or Cram: Julius Thomas, TE, Denver Broncos

Availability: 45% Yahoo, 44% ESPN

Stat Me Up: Thomas caught five passes for 110 yards and two touchdowns on seven targets.

$$$ Value: $2. While you’re bound to find someone that will go nuts and overpay by $5-$10, one game does not a Gronk make. I’m putting that on T-shirt.

The Gist: Orange Julius was one of Peyton Manning’s fave targets last Thursday against Baltimore. However, the Ravens were concentrated on covering the other Orange weapons. Thomas does have some Antonio Gates-like qualities, including being injury prone. Thomas totaled just four games last year.

X-File: Before his five catches last week, Thomas had caught just one pass in two years.

Jam it or Cram it: While Thomas has plenty of *insert fantasy writer cliché here*, Manning just has too many mouths to feed in Denver and not enough…ahem..balls to go around. CRAM

 

Jam or Cram: Dallas Cowboys D/ST

Availability: 84% Yahoo, 58% ESPN

Stat Me Up: The ‘Boys D scored 26 fantasy points while giving up 31 real points. Dallas had 3 sacks, 3 picks, 3 fumble recoveries and scored 2 touchdowns. Nice work, Eli.

$$$ Value: $1. If you spend over a buck on a defense it better be this one.

The Gist: Defensive coordinator Monte Kiffin’s new-look/old-school defense was all over Manning and company. The six turnovers were the most by a Dallas D since 1985. Kiffin was only 73 years-old then.

X-File: Between 2000 and 2008, the Kiffin-coordinated Buccaneer defenses were ranked top five in takeaways five out of nine years.

Jam it or Cram it: It’s a classic Cowboys and Indians battle this weekend in Kansas City. Jerry Jones has already shipped the Chiefs a pile of small pox infused blankets and a case of firewater. JAM

 

Thanks for hanging in the Razzball lounge. Follow The Guru on Twitter @TheGuruGS  for the daily jam or cram, fantasy roster 411’s and other gooey shenanigans.

From Around The Web

  1. Nick says:
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    Denarius Moore, Kenny Britt, or Chirs Ivory at flex this week?

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Ivory won’t do much against the Pats D. Moore and Britt are pretty even, but I’m leaning Moore against the Jags. Britt had just 2 targets last week.

  2. eltoo says:
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    I have #1 waiver priority, use it on Bell? You don’t seem super high on him, but I’m thin at RB.

    Also, better play this week (PPR), Edelman or Randle? Looks like Amendola is going to be out for me so Edelman seems like the obvious replacement, but I anticipate the Den/NYG game to be a high scoring affair. Alternatively, I could start both and bench Hartline.

    QB: P Manning
    WR: Fitzgerald
    WR: Amendola
    RB: SJax
    RB: MJD
    Flex: Colston
    Flex: Hartline

    BN: Edelman, Randle, Hopkins, Dobson, B Pierce, M Reece

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Roll Edleman out there this week. Brady will be looking his way all day.

      As far as Bell goes, I thought his stat line was a little misleading. But, if you’re thin at RB I could see making a play for him, especially with Bush not being the most healthy back around.

  3. Barker says:
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    10 team 1/2 ppr flex spot can use a qb

    I am down amendola this week so i had a surprise waiting for me a trade , my vick for his miles austin

    My team qb vick wr marshall jennings colston rb lynch charles te cook qb/flex RGIII
    Bench roethlisberger le veon bell d rich finley amendola

    Countered with roeth for austin no bites — kid has pryor dalton and rivers was thinking of adding pryor to his side — would make it vick for austin and pryor

    Is pryors juice worth the squeeze — can he aproximate vick and stay healthier
    Any and all advice would be greatly appreciated

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Hey Barker, guys must be fighting for QB’s in that league. I’d think you could get a better wideout than Austin for Vick. I’d look at dropping LeVeon for Hartline or Edelman or even taking a chance with Andre Roberts if they are out there.

      • Barker says:
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        @The Guru: available wrs on waiver wire include edelman sanders randle roberts malcolm floyd moore givens royal little

        Hartline was drafted would it be worth a try at bell for hartline as edelman will prolly be claimed over me or wait till waivers clears and get a name from this motley crue

        • The Guru

          The Guru says:
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          I’d try for Edelman or Roberts with a claim.

  4. Richie says:
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    Is Terrelle Pryor worth a #1 waiver? I already have Russell Wilson at QB

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      In a one QB league I’d say no. You’re good with Wilson.

      • Richie says:
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        @The Guru: I was thinking along the same lines. Thanks

        • The Guru

          The Guru says:
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          No prob. I like what I’m seeing from Pryor, but I never carry 2 QB’s. Just grab the best you can when Wilson hits his bye week.

  5. Mr. Rickey says:
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    This is my bench in a 12 team non-PPR league:
    Vereen
    Bryce Brown
    Chris Ivory
    Britt
    Pead

    My RBs are Jamal Charles and MJD; WRs are Julio, Hicks and Colston. Would you make a waiver claim for Hartline, Bell, Da’Rel, Edelman, Marlon Brown or Harry Douglas? Alternatively, would you grab Knile Davis – JC scared me on Sun. Thanks for your thoughts.

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Knile Davis is one to keep an eye on for sure. I’d take Hartline, Edelman (especially this week) and Bell over what you have on the bench. Vereen is on IR for 8 weeks at least, Ivory is on a mess of a team and Pead…who knows. Brown and Britt I’d hold for now.

  6. Skinny Pete says:
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    Great column. Would you deal Written and Lacy for Brady and Ball? My current quarterback is Big Ben (autopick) and my backup running backs are Moreno and BJGE.

    • Skinny Pete says:
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      @Skinny Pete: That should read Witten.

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Thanks, that’s an interesting trade. In a PPR league I probably wouldn’t. You might be able to stream QB’s and be alright. Brady is enticing though. Who’s your backup TE?

      • Skinny Pete says:
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        @The Guru: Backup tight end is Jermichael Finley. Trying to fix my fiance’s autodraft team. Standard twelve team ESPN league.

        • The Guru

          The Guru says:
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          Ha! Good luck, Pete. Will be more gratifying when you win. Trade Witten for Brady.

  7. hola guru –

    follow your work in baseball, nice to see you here in football as well. thx for the content.

    LEAGUE: 14 team, deep 21 man roster, redraft PPR + IDP. Big $$, so everyone knows their stuff.

    GENERAL OFFENSIVE SCORING: 1 pt/ reception. 1 pt / 10 yds rushing. 1 pt/ 15 yds receiving. 6 pts/ touchdown for rb/wr/te. 4 pts/ touchdown for qb

    POSITIONS: 1 qb, 2 rb, 3 wr, 1 te, 1 flex (wr/rb/te), 1 k + 6 IDPS (2 lb, 1 db, 1 dl, 2 d flex)

    OFFENSIVE ROSTER: QB – luck. RB – d.wilson, vereen, ivory, ballard, a.brown. WR – dez, colston, ant. brown, al. jeffery, g. litte. TE – finley. K – walsh

    WAIVERS: FAAB ($250).

    Of the following 5 available offensive FLEX OPTIONS (WR/TE), how would you rank them and at what “general” FAAB dollar amount (my ranking below and thinking in parenthetical)..? I realize this varies league to league, but just curious your take given the $250 – FAAB system.

    1. Marlon Brown –
    2. Rod Streater –
    3. Kellen Winslow Jr. –
    4. Brent Celek –

    thanks in advance

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Hey Burro, thanks for writing in. Losing Vereen to IR for at least 8 weeks will hurt.
      For the week I’d rank them: Winslow, Brown, Streater, Celek. With a $250 budget and it being a deep league, I’d still be unwilling to pay more than $2 for any off them. I try to save my cash for RB’s and guys with a lot of upside.

      • @The Guru:

        painfully aware. OK; we’re on same page… I had the highest guy at $5, which was Brown… thanks

        • The Guru

          The Guru says:
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          Anytime. Good luck

  8. Fratstar says:
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    Would you trade D’marco Murray? I’m worried about him being injury prone…

    If so…what’s the least I should expect in return?

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Depends on what you can get. He looked pretty good last week, but carried it a lot with no real backup in Dallas. I understand the injury concerns, but we knew it when we drafted him. Can’t imagine you would get much value in return. Ride him until he breaks.

  9. kidbr9 says:
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    Who do you like the most ROS: DHB, Kenbrell, or Alshon? NON-PPR. Thanks, Guru.

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      I just have to think that Brady and Thompkins will figure it out. The guy had 14 targets last week and there’s not a lot of options with Amendola down, Vereen on IR, Gronk recovering and Hernandez property of the Mass. dept of corrections. Someone has to catch it.

  10. fitz says:
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    Trading J. Bell for Forte is a no brainer for the team getting Forte, right?

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Hell, yes! Is someone doing bath salts?

      • fitz says:
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        @The Guru: I guess so, this is my first year doing fantasy football so I’m having a hard time assessing trade values.

        This league has an OP position in addition to Flex which everyone seems to start a 2nd QB as their OP.

        I traded Freeman/J. Bell for Sanchez/Forte

        Bell could be kept in the 14th rnd next year but it’s a league where you only keep 2 players anyway so I doubt I would have kept him.

        I have Pryor so I felt that made Freeman expendable.

        Thanks for making me feel good about this trade.

        • The Guru

          The Guru says:
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          Good luck, Fitz.

  11. FillyP says:
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    1) Drop Mendenhall for J. Bell in a 12 team PPR (0.5/rec) ?

    2) Start D. Richardson (@ ATL) or CJ2K (@ HOU) this week?

    3) Dallas D/ST (@ KC) or Arizona D/ST (vs. DET) ? I would have to drop somebody (probably Freeman) in order to pickup Dallas.

    4) Drop Fred Davis for Winslow?

    Thanks!

  12. The Guru

    The Guru says:
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    Drop Mendenhall, start D-Rich, stream Dallas, keep Davis.

    • FillyP says:
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      @The Guru:

      We’re on the same page then. Thanks!

  13. Mike says:
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    Reggie Wayne or nicks ROS?

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      It’s a toss up there. I have them about even. But I’ll say Wayne as he’s Luck’s go-to man.

  14. Mike says:
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    Is Julius Thomas a big upgrade over Cameron ROS?
    Thx

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      I’m a Cameron believer. Nice game from Thomas, he won’t have another that good.

  15. Scott says:
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    Would you rather have Baltimore’s defense or Dallas’s defense ROS?

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      ROS I’d go Ravens.

  16. Juice_0321 says:
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    Eyes on any D other than Dallas this week that I could roll out besides my SEA @ SF D?

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      NE, CINCY, HOU, ARI are 4 I have ahead of SEA.

      • Juice_0321 says:
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        @The Guru: None of those available. Are you rolling SEA out this week? Available are BAL, GB, TB, KC, MIA….you get the idea.

      • fitz says:
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        @The Guru: How would you rank the Titans D?

        • The Guru

          The Guru says:
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          They’ll be lucky to get 6 points this week. A sleeper D is Carolina.

          • The Guru

            The Guru says:
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            SEA at hope is tough.

      • Buge Hoobs says:
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        @The Guru: What about OAK vs. Jax???

        • The Guru

          The Guru says:
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          No thanks. Ha

  17. ManuteBologna says:
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    What would you bid for Edelman ib FAAB league if you needed flex help in ppr league

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      I wouldn’t bid any more than $3.

  18. Ty says:
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    Nice! Jam/Cram for football too. I’m in 2nd place in FBB and all I can think about is foots. Ok Guru I know its only been one game but what do you think about Gates? Should I hold or jump on Winslow, Myers, Celek or Clark

    • Ty says:
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      @Ty: 1pt Ppr league

      • The Guru

        The Guru says:
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        Is Cameron out there? Winslow prob the best bet in week 2.

        • Ty says:
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          @The Guru: nawp he got drafted.. So you’d be ok dropping Gates for Winslow?

          • The Guru

            The Guru says:
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            I’m one of those guys that if I didn’t get one of the top 3 TE’s, I’ll stream the best matchups. I like Winslow against the Pats LB’s. They can’t cover.

            • Ty says:
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              @The Guru:
              Thanks Guru… Yeah I’m going do drop gates and go into stream mode. I like my rams D but I think I’m going to drop and stream there also.. Panthers or hold?

              • The Guru

                The Guru says:
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                No prob, Ty. Stream away.

  19. fitz says:
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    Wow, that Forte trade got vetoed.

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      That sucks. But I’m not surprised. Pretty lopsided in the Forte side.

      • fitz says:
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        @The Guru: It’s essentially a 2 QB league and he has Rivers, Sanchez and Gabbert. Clearly he needs a 2nd QB. Giving up Forte for J. Bell and Freeman doesn’t seem that unfair.

        Plus I think the scoring in this league may be atypical. 13 of the top 16 top scoring players in this league were QB’s in 2012. Is that true for standard leagues?

        • The Guru

          The Guru says:
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          I believe 7 of the top 10 scorers in 2012 were QB’S in standard leagues. Maybe you can make a plea to your commish or try bribery to get the trade through. Scotch usually works.

          • fitz says:
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            @The Guru: I think I’m going back to baseball, lol.

            • The Guru

              The Guru says:
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              Is there Fantasy Basket Weaving?

              • fitz says:
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                @The Guru: New trade: Forte/Tavon Austin, Sanchez for T.Y. Hilton, J. Bell, Freeman

                Hopefully a little more fair now, giving up Hilton?

                • The Guru

                  The Guru says:
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                  Forte is the best player in the deal. Seems fair. Austin will surprise. Sanchez is obviously a drop.

                • fitz says:
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                  @fitz: Plus I just lost Vereen which is why I wanted Forte to begin with.

                  Anyway thanks for listening to my bitching!

                  • The Guru

                    The Guru says:
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                    No prob, fitz. Good luck

  20. Juice_0321 says:
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    I’m a Forbath owner. I liked him a lot with the pairing with RG, but he looked terrible last night. Do you see him as a solid K option for the season? Akers, Hartley, Gould, Bullock, Henry, Feely are all out there.

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Damn kickers. Such a roll of the dice. Hartley may be the guy this week.

  21. Mike says:
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    Cam newton and Brandon Marshall for Gronk and either josh Gordon/Myles Austin

    I have romo but think upgrade…concerned with Gronk injuries and if he doesn’t look good trade value drops big…
    Would u do it?
    I can play Julius Thomas or Cameron at TE
    Thx

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Newton/Marshall side for me.

  22. chunk says:
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    hartline or decker ros? super shallow league

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Have to stick with Decker here, but Hartline will be a solid player.

  23. Mike says:
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    Would u do it if he wants Garçon instead of Myles Austin?

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      That changes things. I wouldn’t do it.

      • The Guru

        The Guru says:
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        Hold out and see if he’ll take Austin.

  24. Mike says:
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    Thx
    Will give it a shot

  25. Hans says:
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    Currently have Marshall, Decker, Mike Williams and Michael Flloyd. How do you think Michael Floyd will do for the season? Is he worth dropping for Edelman?

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      I’d hold. Floyd and Palmer look like they’ll be good together. Edelman is a nice stream for the next few weeks.

  26. The Thumb says:
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    Would it be crazy to start Vick over Wilson next week?

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Not completely crazy. They will score about the same. My question is why own both? Try to trade one for a RB or WR upgrade.

      • The Thumb says:
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        @The Guru: Effing league restrictions

  27. bryan says:
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    Thoughts on David Wilson? Is he worth taking a chance on as a flex for an unlucky Vareen owner?

    Got offered D Wilson and Desean Jackson for Julio Jones.

    My other wrs are Garcon and Josh Gordon and picking up Edelman
    My other rbs are McCoy, D Murray

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      That’s a roll of the dice. I’d give Garcon for Wilson. Not Julio. I think Wilson will be good this year though.

  28. Jiggy Nits says:
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    I’m thinking about cutting Knowshon just because I dont see a lot of upside. Right now I also have TRich, DeMarco Murray, DeAngelo, Gio Bernard, Bernard Pierce. Is Moreno worth dropping for the likes of Kendall Hunter or Christine Michael? I just cant see myself playing Moreno much and the injury upside of the other guys is so tempting.

    Thanks!

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Sure, worth a gamble. Knile Davis might be a guy worth rolling the dice on.

      • Jiggy Nits says:
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        @The Guru: Thought about him first! :) He’s owned – but Hunter didnt get scooped up of waivers. Sent a Moreno trade offer for Davis; if he doesnt bite Ill probably do the Add/drop. Thanks for your help!

  29. Alisha says:
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    Looking ahead to week six I need a backup for Ryan. Pryor vs KC or Dalton vs Bills? Thanks for your input.

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      By that time there might be a zombie apocalypse. I’ll say Dalton.

  30. RG3 Needs a Knee says:
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    Would you roster Sam Bradford or Pryor as a backup behind RG3?

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      It’s not worth having 2 QB’s. Stream the best option during RGII’s bye week. You’re better off using the roster spot on RB with some high upside.

  31. bill says:
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    16 person league just had Vareen go down… need a new RB2 and Flex – not too many options, here’s what I’ve got, need some advice

    QB:Cam
    RB1: Forte
    RB2: Ingram, Tolbert, Powell, Bolden (Pick 1)
    WR: Wayne
    WR: Garcon
    TE: Cook
    FLex: All RB2 options + Hartline, Marlon Brown (Pick 1)

    thanks!

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Powell and Hartline may be your best options this week.

  32. Clint (aka Pablo Death) says:
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    So, with the ‘Skins and Bungles on schedule for my Packer D/St the next 2 weeks before their bye, should I follow suit and JAM the Cowgirls in there instead? Dropping a Packer for a Cowboy’s almost sacreligious to me but then again, allegiances and fantasy championships rarely go together or so I hear.

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Be a ‘Boy’s Believer! That Monte Kiffin looks stout. And by stout I mean I’m drinking now. Start the Dallas D.

  33. B says:
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    12 Team PPR
    My Jermichael Finley & Daryl Richardson for His Jimmy Graham

    I do this all day right?

    My current RBs:
    Reggie Bush
    Darren Sproles
    Daryl Richardson
    Isaiah Pead
    Joique Bell

    Best available waiver RB is probably Ronnie Hillman, or if the team in question drops Woodhead or Pierre Thomas.

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Sorry for the late reply, hope you made the trade.

  34. Frank White says:
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    Sup Guru… Do you do this post every Tuesday??

    • The Guru

      The Guru says:
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      Hey Frank, yes I’ll be jamming and cramming every Tuesday. Good luck this season.

Comments are closed.