Hey everyone! I’ve joined the pristine group of Razzball Fantasy contributors to shine a light on the Fantasy Football season in hopes that you heed my words of wisdom and win your leagues.

In terms of specific players and projections, I will leave that to the other writers who are doing a magnificent job. My focus today will be on the draft itself and why it is so very important for you to do adequate homework before you head into your draft lobby. Nobody likes sitting there in a draft when you’re on the clock and you are completely clueless as to who you should draft, forcing you to panic-pick someone overrated that will end up on the waiver wire after Week 2.

In the words of wisdom from a great fantasy football player:

“You can’t win your league in the first three rounds of a draft, but you can lose your league in those rounds.” – Myself, obviously.

So what do I mean when I refer to “homework”?  This post is going to focus on topics you need to be privy to before draft day…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Hello everyone, and welcome to another post in our draft strategy series where today, we’ll take a look at the wide receiver position for 2017, and how to best attack it in drafts. Again, like the post I wrote about quarterbacks and running backs, this will be more of an open discussion about the position and less about the three players I like, the three I don’t, etc. So let’s get started now about how I think the WR position will be attacked in drafts, and how it should be attacked in drafts.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

eifert-tyler-12232015-us-news-getty-ftr_16pt9c6ue61uk1rl5wojwqcfhc

Hello everyone, and welcome to the 14th installment of the Start ‘Em and Sit ‘Em series. I’ll keep it short for you guys everyone, so welcome to the playoffs and let’s get started… With A.J. Green’s departure a few weeks ago due to a hamstring injury, certain players have had to pick up the slack from his lack of production values, and Eifert has done the most absorbing of this production value. His an increasing target share, snap counts, and even red zone efficiency, it’s no wonder why he is producing like the way he is. This week he’ll only have to battled with Brandon LaFell and the two running backs to get the targets and looks he deserves, but he’ll have a great matchup on the way, against a Cleveland Browns team that ranks as the 31st pass defense in the NFL, and 31st in the NFL against TE’s, who give up close to 65 yards and 0.8 TD’s per game. Fire him up with confidence…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

National Football League, we’ve got a lot of problems with you, and now you’re going to hear about it. In no particular order, when did the NFC North become the new AFC South? With the NFC East being a pretty good division again, does that mean I have to start wearing my 90’s flannel shirts? And should we all get concussions? Afterall, according to you, it’s not just a concussion, it’s a cancussion. Why is it, that amidst your “Salute to Service” Sunday, that you don’t mention that the taxpayers fund all the lavish patriotism we see every Sunday? What is a catch? It’s like the only thing that’s ever stayed a controversy in football since I was a kid. That, and John Elway probably being a secret horse in disguise. In fact, here was the first official NFL rules committee meeting to define what exactly a catch was. But most of all (just in the context of yesterday, because why trap yourself, ya know?), I’m so confused on how the Seahawks actually won. (Note: It’s weird to watch a game where you end up screaming in agony when anything good happens for either team.) Admittedly, I’m not so much confused on how they actually won, that’s pretty straightforward; it was some combination of an overrated New England defense getting exposed, mixed with big nights from Russell Wilson (25/37, 348 YDS, 9.4 AVG, 3 TD, 124.6 RTG and 3 CAR, 6 YDS) and C.J. Prosise (17 CAR, 66 YDS, 3.9 AVG, 10 LONG and 7 REC, 87 YDS, 12.4 AVG, 38 LONG, 7 TGTS). But how the Seahawks could win in such a karmaic (word?) fashion… I mean, talk about sh*tty calls for the last four plays of the game, almost seems familiar. Almost like it’s happened before… And I’m sure the Boston media will have a field day talking about how the “non-call” on Gronk was a crime against humanity, a genocide they’ll say! Well, if he didn’t do such a great job blocking into the endzone on a run play to Blount that should have been the call, they might have had a case. In the mean time, I wouldn’t worry to much about Patriots “nation” forming a protest to go against the result, mainly because they probably think “genocide” has something to do with the Jets…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

One is an underrated story that fell apart under it’s own depressive weight and the other is the movie 28 Grams. For those who are wondering why Mark Ingram (3 CAR, 5 YDS, 1.7 AVG, 2 LONG, 1 FUM) did his best impersonation of Toby Gerhart, behold:

New Orleans Saints running back Mark Ingram lost a fumble for the second straight week during Sunday’s win over the Seattle Seahawks. …After that, all of the Saints’ handoffs went to Tim Hightower and rookie Daniel Lasco. Ingram was not available for comment in the locker room after the game. “He wasn’t carrying it loose,” Payton said of the fumble against the Seahawks. “They were able to just pull it free. We’ll be back to work with him.” Payton said not fumbling had been a point of emphasis for Ingram after the previous game, which explains the quick decision to go to Hightower.Source.

I just want to add that Tim Hightower fumbled in the same game AND Ingram has five career fumbles. Five. You know, it would really screw up my week if I have to drive all the way out to New Orleans to punch Sean Payton in the d*ck. Anyhow, we’re here to get ready for Halloween by eating a copious amount of Twix bars to talk about Sunday’s games and Fantasy Football, so let’s get started!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

spencer-ware-tackled

Hey guys! I’m glad to be back after a week off in which I took the ACT, but now I cannot wait to jump into Week 8 of the NFL season. Big thanks to the main man MB for taking over this column last week, he absolutely nailed it with some of the selections, most notably Jameis Winston and his dominating performance against the 49ers. But I’m still better-looking.

Anyway, I had to miss last week due to my taking of the ACT test, which reminded me of Fantasy Football. We prepare as long and as hard as we can, even maybe spending money to prep for the test, yet we still do not know what will be on it: so we need to not only be prepared for it, and we need some luck on our side. It helps if we also can pull off at least one lopsided. But I don’t know how that last statement refers to the ACT, but at least we got it out of the way.

This week kinda marks the halfway point of the year. Leave a comment down below of what your record is, and if I and this column, or even Razzball in general has contributed to your success. Or declines. Accentuate the positive.

Of first matchup of Week 8 comes between two styles of football in the AFC. One marked by a solid defensive unit, and on offense, marked by a traditional conservatism offensive attack, and in turned, marked by strength at the HB position. Then we have the Colts…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Would it be too much to ask for if this could end in a 3-3 tie? Those are the things you wonder during weekday football, especially on a weekday after that Seahawks and Cardinals game in which I actually got a contact bore. And so, while I didn’t get my wish, last night’s game was full of intrigue, excitement, and none of those things. Don’t get me wrong, the game didn’t turn out as bad as the first quarter had me thinking. I mean, it was still pretty bad, but not historically bad, which Monday Night and Thursday Night Football are potentially capable of. That being said, the game was still over before the half, and I’m sure we’re not the better for it in any way. Add into the fact that Jon Gruden went full tool mode and put forth an interesting observation that with all the injuries this year in the NFL, perhaps the reduction in physical contact practice was to blame…. Yeah, that makes about as much sense as me getting sleepy because I got plenty of rest. Beyond that, well, I’d love to tell you about a football game, but I’m not entirely sure I saw one…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

ct-jeremy-langford-kadeem-carey-bears-spt-0803-20160802

Loyal Razzballers and deep leaguers, we’re changing the format of the Deep Impact series from here on out. Rather than plug some under-owned options to consider for Week 7, instead, we will talk about all the ins and outs of wedding planning. Who says that planning a wedding should only be handled by the bride-to-be? Men, close your fantasy football apps and be an active part of the process… *answers call from Jay* I’ve been informed that the format of the article is actually staying the same, and also to beg all of you to never, ever stop paying attention to fantasy football for any reason. Don’t go anywhere! Please? You still there? Great! As we’ve been doing every week, let’s take a look at some guys below 10% owned in Yahoo that are worth using for Week 7. If you haven’t been reading every week, well, congrats! You’re probably doing pretty well so far this season.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

While many of us wondered why we would ever watch a Colts and Texans Oilers (their momma named ’em the Oilers, so I’m going to call ’em the Oilers) Sunday Night Football game, you have to remember that we all make bad life decisions. I mean, what’s the NLCS anyways? Is that like the LGBT or something? But hey, sometimes the games that you give zero efs about with no one to cheer for turn out great. This was not one of those times, at least not until the fourth quarter where we suddenly found ourselves in overtime (where I immediately said to myself: “sh*t, we’re in overtime”). Since the Texans Oilers aren’t a real team, it probably made a lot of sense there was a fairytale ending (thanks in large part to that amazing catch by Jaelen Strong shown above). On top of that, you might wonder why we’re talking about the Texans Oilers, and I’d like to use it as a fantasy football segue… Week 6 is behind us and at this point, and you should know where you are in the great and very metaphorical fantasy football landscape. Much like how the Texans Oilers, now at 4-2, know that they are a team that is in the hunt for the playoffs, they could use a little bit more help from certain players, and a little bit luck to make their push. I’d like to think that describes a majority of fantasy teams out there right now, minus the whole Brock Osweiler thing. What I’m saying here might even describe fantasy teams that find themselves atop their respective leagues, but unfortunately, probably not the teams that find themselves at the bottom with an 0-6 record. Coming back from such a deficit may not be worth thinking about, so in times like this when you are way behind (something I’m quite familiar with… something we all are), my recommendation is to drink up. I mean, don’t drink too much… motionless and face down is not how I want to see anybody. (There’s a great Bill Cosby joke around here somewhere, but I’ll settle for: I’ll take “Things Darren Sharper has never said” for $1,000 Alex.) But if you’re one of the teams lagging a bit behind, let’s say you are 1-5 or 2-4, and desperate hope combined with dark wizardry are the only vehicles driving your will to play until another fantasy obsession distracts you (granted, Texans Oilers games are technically considered torture porn, if that’s your thing), well, now is the time to do wild stuff. Do some crazy trades, make some risky decisions, just let all your inhibitions go. True, this might be like buying an extra bottle of Centrum Silver to help fight stage four lung cancer, but… you’ve got nothing to lose. And for those of you are in the middle of all this mess? Well then, that’s why Razzball is here. Oh, and if you’re a Colts or Texans Oilers fan, I’d appreciate it if you found some different teams to like…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Paired up against the second Presidential debate, it was easy to get distracted away from football to see the immediate fallout off the now infamous Donald Trump video, that amongst other things, had him describing how he likes grabbing women’s bathing suit areas as a mating ritual of some sort. (Let’s approach this anatomically really quick… can you actually “grab” someone by the hoo-ha? I mean, wouldn’t that be like picking up a bowling ball with just your thumb? It doesn’t even make any sense…) While I want to acknowledge that there was a very important moment in history that occurred last night in terms of how much you enjoy the consumption of popcorn while watching an 167-car pileup, I would only say this one thing before I move on: I wish someone had asked a fantasy football question. I mean, with all the bye weeks coming up, it IS topical as f*ck, right? So that being said, I’ll continue where the title of our post teases, which is: was that the most Eli game ever? That might have been. I mean, on one hand, Eli Manning somehow led the Giants to two Super Bowl titles. On the other hand, there’s stuff like this: 18-for-35, 199 yards and 1 TD, and the bi-weekly fumble (as opposed to his bi-weekly interception). This sort of relates to him as a fantasy quarterback too (XBox Segue Achievement Unlocked), in that at the base level, he’s a pretty run-of-the-mill option that ends up giving you 3500+ yards and 30+ touchdowns. There’s value to that, sure, and of course the Razzball community knows our policy with quarterbacks in most formats is to delay in the draft as long as you can (like my lovemaking), and this is usually where we end up: a bit below Ben Roethlisberger and a bit above the Andy Dalton line. But what I think separates the quarterbacks in this group are their weapons. Having probably one of the best receiving trios in the NFL is a fantasy boon is something that certainly keeps his value up, even when there are macabre games like this.

Here’s what else I saw during yesterday’s Week 5 Sunday games… (Maybe this will be the first week the Chargers don’t lose a high profile player to injury. MAYBE.)

Please, blog, may I have some more?