LOGIN

We’ve done it. The final week of the 2023-24 fantasy football season is upon us, but for most of you, your league has already wrapped up and crowned a champion. If that was you, congratulations! If you came up short, good try! If you failed to make the postseason, boo! And if you placed dead last, fire up that hot needle, and let’s get that “I’m a Loser” buttcheek tattoo underway! *farting noise* However, if you are still competing, we’re here to assist with your weekly start vs. sit needs. There might be a championship on the line or a last-place punishment you’re desperately hoping to avoid. So, without further ado, let’s get into the analysis of names like Trevor Lawrence, Tua Tagovailoa, Najee Harris, and more. Week 18 start vs. sit begins right now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Enough, already! Can we PLEASE stop trying to make Justin Fields a thing in fantasy football? What are we doing!? I’m done with the cutesy little introductions and self-deprecating jokes. It’s time to take a stand. I don’t care if he runs, throws, flies, digs underground and shoots lasers out of his eyes! The Chicago Bears offense isn’t worth it. Fantasy football playoffs are here, for Booger McFarland’s sake! Some of us need to get our heads out of our buttcracks, unless you’re still trying to figure out the best place for that last place finisher tattoo you’re about to be forced into getting. 

So, let’s get to it and fire up those decisions. This week, we’ll touch on Geno Smith, Austin Ekeler, Gus Edwards, Garrett Wilson and more. But if you don’t see your player of interest, hit me up in the comments. Week 16 start vs. sit begins right now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It’s fantasy POSTSEASON, y’all! Here’s to ensuring your playoff run continues into next week and the week thereafter and beyond, until you’re a 2023 fantasy football champion. Either that, or you’re competing to avoid the toilet bowel, last place and effectively being forced into having the league winner’s grandmother’s likeness tattooed onto your right buttcheek. Or your left. Or both. Or maybe you have to play frogger in four-lane traffic for an hour. I have no way of knowing how sick in the head your leaguemates are. All I can do is help you from becoming Main Street roadkill or having Grandma Elsa’s face stenciled onto your backside.

So let’s get to it and fire up those decisions. This week, we’ll touch on Justin Fields, D’Andre Swift, James Cook, Calvin Ridley and more. But if you don’t see your player of interest, hit me up in the comments. Week 15 start vs. sit begins right now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It’s all coming down to the wire, so don’t look down now! As we enter Week 14, you’re either sitting comfortably with a playoff spot in hand, battling tooth and nail to get in, enjoying the luxury of a bye, hyped for playoff fantasy football, or eliminated with no hopes of emerging from the grave. That’s a lot of potential options. Even more than I thought when I started typing. Hopefully, you’re not in situation No. 5, or else reading these very words is likely a complete waste of your time and you need to get back to fulfilling that TPS Report your boss asked about on Monday. Or possibly, you just love fantasy football so much you couldn’t possibly flick off the switch, no matter the circumstances. But regardless if you’re weathering the storm or your entire livelihood is on the line, we’ve got your start vs. sit advice right here. And if you don’t see the player you’re looking for, hit up the comments section, and let’s chat. Week 14 start vs. sit begins right now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Come here, come all. I have a tale I would like to share with you. I have a dear, dear friend named Nicholas who is a Buffalo Bills fan, and currently lives in a furious state of ceaseless agony. Not because he’s from New Jersey, no. But because he now watches all Bills games alone at home, in the dark, covered in a thick, wool blanket while clutching a sofa cushion desperately across his breast. “I’m in a bad place right now,” he says to me more than on occasion. And unfortunately, matters have only worsened since we last encountered, dear Razzballers. Alas, my dear friend finds himself in the midst of a full-on frenzy, which has only clouded his ability to adequately manage his fantasy roster. In Week 10, he inadvertently left Tee Higgins at Flex in the heat of a ruthless playoff race. It’s mid-November. We’ve reached that point where frustrations, or even concentrations, may be coming to a boiling point, either in regard to your NFL team or your fantasy roster. If you’re 2-8, chances are your playoff hopes are over. But please, please, do not be a New Jersey Nicholas. Do not allow your desperation as a fan to impact your attention-to-detail as an owner. And with a little bit of extra analysis from this week’s column, you could be sitting purdy (which I reccomend in the column) on Sunday. Week 11 start vs. sit begins right now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Last week Isiah Pacheco and Kenneth Gainwell led the way in my Breakout Running Backs piece – a Chief and Eagle on Super Bowl week! – while this week we turn our attention to some high-flyers and explosive players in the passing attack. Let’s dive in and take a closer look at my potential breakout […]

Please, blog, may I have some more?

After three consecutive days of gluttonous eating and drinking – yes, my family even does Christmas Eve-Eve – I’m sitting down at 11:41 p.m. EST to bring you my weekly target report. Some might call that dedication. I don’t care if it’s 11:40 at night, 1 in the morning or even freakin’ 4 in the […]

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Countless hours of research. Long, sleepless nights. Tossing and turning in bed… start or sit? Start or sit? Moments of believing we are actual NFL general managers. All that over-exaggerated drama brings us here: The fantasy football final four. The margin of error has now decreased from slim to none. One wrong push of a […]

Please, blog, may I have some more?

My main takeaway from Week 9 of Thursday Night Football is that the Houston Texans have a lot of players that I have never heard of. That either means I’m really bad at my job, or that the Houston front office is even more lackluster at theirs. Four tight ends in this game were projected to score fantasy points, including the Texans’ Jordan Akins and some guy named Brevin Jordan. But it was in fact TE Teagan Quitoriano, projected for zero points in this matchup, who put Houston ahead, 7-0, with a two-yard touchdown reception from QB Davis Mills in the first quarter. Also of news: the Texans have players named Chris Moore (4 receptions, 43 yards, 1 TD) and Tyron Johnson (1 reception, eight yards). This is a real thing. On the Eagles’ side, QB Jalen Hurts (21-27, 243 yards, 2 TD; 9 carries, 23 yards) and WR A.J. Brown (4 receptions, 59 yards, 1 TD) were up to their usual tricks, but it was TE Dallas Goedert (8 receptions, 100 yards, 1 TD) and RB Miles Sanders (17 carries, 93 yards, 1 TD) who really kicked HC Lovie Smith (1 really white beard, 1 win, 6 losses) in the crotch.

Here’s what else I saw in another riveting edition of Thursday Night Football.

Please, blog, may I have some more?