As a Jets fan, I can only imagine the magic, turbulent carpet ride it’s been this year. Start the year 1-0 with a nail-biter against the Bucs, then turn around and lose a similarly close game to the Pats. Follow that up with what looked like maybe a statement game against the Bills only to get trounced by the Titans in week 4. Maybe New York is just gonna have to kick back and enjoy this roller coaster ride. Either way, Geno Smith will be the person getting you set up. Are you buckled in? Is the bar secure? Ok, go! Geno finished the night with 199 passing yards for 3 TDs, and a win to go with zero INTs. The interceptions have been the biggest bugaboo so far with Geno as he came into the night with 8 INT but tonight he looked very comfortable in the pocket and was able to make his quick reads and get the ball out fast. He still needs to work on his general pocket awareness but given the Falcons’ general defensive rush problems, he didn’t have to worry about that as much tonight. If we’re talking fantasy relevance with Geno, I think we’re either talking late season or for keeper/dynasty leagues because he’s still not on my pick up radar at this point but in terms of relying on him, he’s slowly gaining my fantasy stream trust. In other 2013 Fantasy Football news…Please, blog, may I have some more?
Greetings Razzballer’s, before we run down the jammer crammer’s that could save your fantasy season, please join your humble-but-nonetheless-handsome Guru in the Fantasy Hot Tub Time Machine as we take a short spin through the space-time continuum back to the year 1962. *wavy lines wavy lines* What the hell’s going on here? Hey, look out for that iceberg! Oh, it’s 1912, my bad. I’m king of the world! *more wavy lines* I want to welcome you all to the King’s X Cocktail Bar in Oakland, California. Grab a Manhattan and watch as three Mad Men types – Raiders part-owner Wilfred “Bill” Winkenbach, Raiders “public relation” guy Bill Tunnell and reporter Scotty Stirling – create something that will frustrate and anger all of us for the next 50 years…Fantasy Football. Anytime you combine a wealthy owner with a private dick, a headline fabricator and a pitcher of Tom Collins’ “brilliant” ideas are bound to spring up. Thus, that’s how the Greater Oakland Professional Pigskin Prognosticators League turned into this frustrating game we devote more time and energy to than it actually deserves. Now raise a glass to Bill and the boys, lay a few sawbucks on the ’62 Packers and get your fanny perpendiculars back in the hot tub. *yet more wavy lines* It’s time to jam it or cram it.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Week 2 of the NFL season was like a visit to Bizarro World in the old Superman comics or, for those not comically inclined, the Seinfeld episode where Elaine meets Bizarro Jerry. She had man hands! Those not familiar with the term please note what the scholarly website Uncyclopedia says: “Bizarro World is a situation or setting which is weirdly inverted or opposite of expectations.” In Bizarro World, Bizarro Budweiser tastes like Heineken, Bizarro KFC is made from real live chickens and Bizarro Tim Tebow is a right-handed-pot smoking-antichrist that actually completes passes. What in the name of Lex Luther occurred in our Bizarro Fantasy Football World last week? Philip Rivers played like a de-bearded Dan Fouts, Eddie Royal was catching passes like a goggleless John Jefferson and James Starks morphed into Paul Hornung on a hot streak. If you suffered through an unearthly Sunday, you’re not alone. Half of the top 6 fantasy scorers last week are less than 50% owned across most leagues. If you were one of the 2% that started Charles Clay on Sunday, I surrender my turban to you. Maybe you should be writing this, Bizarro Guru. It’s time to jam it or cram it.Please, blog, may I have some more?
With the recent explosion of tight end production, fantasy football enthusiasts including dynasty owners are now concentrating on a position that would normally be disregarded in the past. On top of their emergence as legitimate fantasy targets, many leagues are transitioning to a tight end friendly scoring format assigning up to a half a point more per reception for tight ends than other positions. Predicting the future success of NFL tight ends has proven to be extremely difficult such as top tight end Jimmy Graham who was drafted in the third round of the NFL draft and Kellen Winslow II who was drafted as the sixth overall player in the 2004 draft and both players, although separated by nearly two rounds, couldn’t have had different careers with Graham emerging as the elite pro bowler and Winslow basically dropping off the face of the earth and literally becoming fantasy irrelevant. So how do you decide who to pick? Experience doesn’t seem to matter as much as athleticism and raw ability and in this draft there are plenty of elite athletes at the tight end position, in fact this year’s NFL draft, although it lacks the elite quarterback or running back, really produced some great long-term options at tight end. Lets take a look at my dynasty tight end rankings and their short-term and long-term outlook for 2013 fantasy football and beyond.Please, blog, may I have some more?
As I’m typing this, Ahmad Bradshaw and the Colts are in ‘heavy negotiations’ for Ahmad to be in Indy for 2013 and it makes me ask the question ‘what exactly does heavy negotiations mean?’ Are you all just farting around the rest of the time having light negotiations? We weren’t really serious the two days prior. In fact, we were really just here for the bottled water and muffins but now we’re, like, totally into it. In either case, I’m gonna live dangerously and say that this deal will be done before I’m finished typing this paragraph and if it isn’t, well I ain’t deletin’ $hit cuz I do believe Bradshaw will officially be a Colt prior to training camp which officially means Vick Ballard will go slide, slide, slippety slide in our 2013 Fantasy Football Rankings this year. Not that I was high on him to begin with but I will admit he felt like a safe RB2 type this year when I wrote my Vick Ballard Fantasy over the off-season. With Ahmad’s eventual signing, we now have an embarrassment of riches at the RB position to start the year and I’ll admit it has me giddy like a school girl and no doubt you as well. Wanna braid hair together? Eh, I said ‘LIKE a school girl’, imaginary reader. Oh, so I guess going to the little girls room to talk is out of question now… Indeed it is, I.R., indeed it is. But where was I? Oh yeah, Ahmad on the Colts makes sense. Just realize Ahmad has only played one full season over the course of 6 years so you’re gonna need to handcuff him with Ballard or possibly Donald Brown if something goes awry in training camp. But enough about that, let’s take a look at some other news that’s happened for the 2013 fantasy football season…Please, blog, may I have some more?
There are literally thousands of sources of rankings, sleepers, busts, breakouts, and burnouts on the internet. The vast majority of them will be focusing on 10-team leagues with the “standard” roster setup of the site in question. But who are they to say what’s standard in the fully customizable world of fantasy football?Please, blog, may I have some more?
So Maurice Jones-Drew finally ended his holdout with Jacksonville on Sunday. Though no word on why he had a change of heart as of this typing, I have to assume he wanted to help Razzball writer Tehol Beddict further his tv career and me so I didn’t have to keep hearing ‘When is MJD going to come back? Why is he so high in your rankings if he’s a hold out? Why do you insist on not wearing pants to a funeral?’, and other great nonsense. Now MJD owners can rejoice, Rashad Jennings owners will weep and my calm demeanor about the whole thing can be understood. As far as the first week goes, I think it’s fair to say no one knows what to expect. He has a game in a week so how in shape and ready he’ll be is anyone’s guess and I wouldn’t be surprised to see Rashad hold some week 1 value because of these questions. Now is there a possibility of him suffering from CJ2K disease? Sure, he could pull a Chris Johnson 2011 season out of his hat but I’m not going to assume that just because he was a holdout that he’ll be a mess for the rest of the season. If you’re a Rashad owner at this point, I’d hold for week one if I had the roster spot to do it with and see how it pans out. You might be able to wrangle a bit of trade value out of him if MJD doesn’t bounce back straight away. With that said, let’s get on with what should be the final preseason blurb before the 2012 fantasy football season kicks off…
Kellen Winslow – Was cut by the Seahawks on Saturday and as of this typing doesn’t have a new team to call home. Remember when I was doing my off season rankings of Tight Ends and said I didn’t understand how Kellen was getting ranked in the top 20 by experts? You don’t? Well where have you been? Probably pretending your fantasy baseball team still had a chance. It’s ok, you’re here now. That’s what matters.Please, blog, may I have some more?
So the story goes, when I started my top 20 tight end rankings for 2012 fantasy football, I decided ‘I’ll write about a few guys that weren’t in the top 20 but deserved some words’. Looking back, instead of defending my lack of love for Kellen Winslow or Martellus Bennett, I wish I’d spent a few moments with the youngster set to be the starting tight end in Minnesota – Kyle Rudolph.
In review of his 2011 rookie season, there isn’t too much to glean from it to say he’s fantasy sleeper material: 26 receptions, 249 yards and 3 touchdowns from his 39 targets. But, to quote a valley girl, ‘that was, like, soooo last season…gag me!’ Seeing as it was Kyle’s rookie year and he was still playing behind Visanthe Shiancoe, we’re going to look at how Minnesota treated their Tight Ends as a whole…there’s a joke about holes and tight ends in that last sentence but I’ll leave it up to your sick imagination to fill in the gap. But I digress, with their magical powers combined, Minnesota produced 62 receptions on 109 targets as well as 658 receiving yards and 6 touchdowns. Those type of numbers would’ve had a tight end that was sniffing around the outside of the top 10 last year if it had come from one Viking rather than the two.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Hakeem Nicks fractured his fifth metatarsal in his right foot on Thursday while trying to learn the salsa dance from Victor Cruz, effectively putting his fantasy relevance this year into serious doubt. Though the timetable put out by the physician says 12 weeks, it was noted that team mate Prince Amukamara had the same injury last year and didn’t even practice until 15 weeks later. On one hand, that puts Hakeem on track to start the season right on time. On the other hand, did ya NOT see how bad some football players were with a shortened training camp last year? I’d be willing to speculate on Hakeem at the right price in drafts this year but something tells me he’ll be too rich for my blood when they start going live. It’s one thing to fully heal and practice it’s another thing to get your timing down. Plus, it’s his foot. I don’t know about you, but in order for me to reach my full potential vertical (I can clear an iPhone box with a strenuous bound), I have to use my feet to do it. Cuts get dicey like your name was ginsu when your foot doesn’t plant like it should. Here’s my strategy on Hakeem and feel free to follow it if you’d like since, well, you come to this site for information like this. Let someone else draft him. You’re going to get enough of your headache from your runningback tandems most likely, you don’t need full on migraines. This news is both a boon and a rub for Cruz owners. Though he’s going to see increased targets, he’s also going to be the focus early in the season by opposing defenses. I already felt he was going to regress this year and this sure doesn’t change my mind. Overall, I feel this simply muddies the WR waters in NYG. There’s the rookie of interest in this story – Rueben Randle – but I wonder if Ramses Barden gets a shot first. Domenik Hixon and his injury history doesn’t make me interested at all. Obviously, we’ll need to see how training camp unfolds but whatever happens, if Eli Manning doesn’t get into a groove with one of them, he might start having some emotional issues. In other fantasy football news…
Kellen Winslow - Traded to a team that doesn’t throw to their TE’s. Fantasy Football analysis of the day: ‘this is not good for Winslow’s 2012 fantasy value’. Couple that with the fact he has Zach Miller competing for targets and this may be the first time in my life that I don’t want to touch a good tight end.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Who is the numero uno tight end for next season? This almost seems like an insanely silly question seeing as how Rob Gronkowski is a friggin unstoppable force. His numbers from last season were ridiculous. He broke records every time he stepped on the field and wasn’t lucky in doing so.Please, blog, may I have some more?