Ambulance Chasers is back! This time with a different shaped ball! And here I am along with it — Razzball’s less talented, uglier, less intelligent version of ESPN’s Stephania Bell.

If you’ve ever checked out the baseball side of Razzball on a Wednesday afternoon these past two years you probably/hopefully have snuck a peak at the baseball version of Ambulance Chasers. If you haven’t seen that column — here’s a little primer: basically, Ambulance Chasers is a weekly column where I discuss injured players and whether I think you should stash them (keep them on your roster) or trash them (send them to the waivers because they are garbage people who have wronged you as team owner.) If I declare someone a “trash them” option — I’ll  also give you a recommendation of someone less-owned than your currently injured player who could be a good replacement option. Since there isn’t an option to just “stash” a player on the DL like baseball I won’t be giving you a replacement option if I think you should be stashing someone. And since everyone’s roster is completely different it is impossible for me to say “stash Player A and replace him with player B!.” Instead, if a major player is injured I’ll be letting you know my prognosis on their injury. For example, if someone is questionable I’ll be making my best judgement on whether I think they’ll be starting come Sunday/Monday or not and if their injury might limit their production that week.

Confused? That’s weird — I literally explained it perfectly. Well, here’s some quick examples:

Josh Gordon, WR, Hamstring Tightness: This is an injury we’ve all been tracking since Gordon reported to camp after his vision quest and at first it looked he wasn’t going to play at all. The latest is that Gordon will play — but will be on limited snaps. Stash or Trash: Stash. I really like Gordon this year — with a good QB in Tyrod Taylor and a healthy mindset for 2018 — I think he can put up solid QB2 production. Injury Prognosis: That being said. I wouldn’t start him in week 1. He’s going to play a limited role in the offense and that means a limited role in your fantasy scoring. Bench him.

DeVante Parker, WR, Broken Finger: For a few weeks now he’s been “up in the air” with this finger injury, but Dolphins beat reporter Armando Salguero is now reporting that Parker is officially OUT for Sunday. Stash or Trash: Stash. Parker should be fine once he’s fully healed. Injury Prognosis: Obviously you’re not going to start him in week 1, but keep an eye on him for week 2. If he’s deemed healthy early next week he could get enough practice time and reps to return to being a viable WR2.

Austin Seferian-Jenkins, TE, Core Muscle Injury: This one seemingly popped up out of nowhere. He didn’t practice on Wednesday and he’s listed as questionable for week 1. Stash or Trash: If you waited this long on TE you might be in trouble if he is a late scratch. If there is a better option on the waivers I’d consider grabbing someone else. Injury Prognosis: I feel like he’s going to play. Last season the Giants allowed the second-most fantasy points to opposing TEs so if he’s in there — he might still be a good option for points.

So there’s a little taste of football Ambulance Chasers. Unfortunately as the season goes on there will be more players in this column. This might evolve a bit in the early weeks as I find what works for football injuries.

As always, follow me on Twitter: @KerryKlug and leave a comment below if you have any specific questions for your team.

  1. Grey

    Grey says:

    Less intelligent than Bell who has never finished about 11th in any fantasy league? Hmm

    • Kerry Klug

      Kerry Klug says:

      @Grey: Oh I just meant med school! She’s that bad? Yowza!

      • Grey

        Grey says:

        @Kerry Klug: My mom went to med school doesn’t mean she can play fantasy — take that, moms!

    • Eric the Waiter with Hands for Hands says:

      @Grey: DAMMIT! the grey’d one beat me to this comment. i wasn’t sure she’s NEVER done that but i was pretty sure she’s horrible at fantasy. might be a good medical advice person though.

  2. Beef jerky says:

    12 team PPR my team
    P. Barber
    A. Jones

    Aj green
    Mike Williams

    My team is gross but would you do Mixon and Diggs for OBJ

    • Kerry Klug

      Kerry Klug says:

      @Beef jerky: Yea, if you can get your trade partner to accept that then I’d offer it up. You need the RB boost.

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