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Last night’s game was more fit for Halloween week than it was the week after. First, there were the scuffles. So many scuffles. Tension is to be expected when two division rivals go toe to toe, but last night, there were extra “your mama so fat” jokes flying around. You guessed it, nobody was taking too kindly to the jokes. 

There was also a few extra minutes of delays in this one. A freakin’ black cat ran onto the field. Who brought the cat in? Why not just sneak in dildos like the fans do in Buffalo? It’s totally possible that this cat breached MetLife Stadium security. Why pay for tickets to see the Giants lose when you can just sneak in for free, amiright? NFL tickets are so expensive nowadays. I can’t even tell you how much money I’ve spent over the past few years to watch the Buccaneers get stomped all across the Midwest. Anyways, this cat made it onto the actual playing surface and was more elusive than Saquon Barkley was the entire game. This cat covered a ton of ground and spent some time in the endzone (Saquon did not). Eventually, the cat ran off the field through the tunnel under it’s own free will. Nobody was coming close to catching it. That was the fun part of the game, now here is the rest of what I saw on Monday Night Football.

Performance Checks

– I started Daniel Jones in my captain spot last night in DFS. I’m not very good at DFS yet.

– Ezekiel Elliott went for 139 yards but didn’t catch any passes or find the end zone. All of that work for 13.9 fantasy points. Work smarter, not harder Zeke!

– Jason Witten led the Cowboys in targets with 9 and caught 8 of them in his MNF revenge game. Take that Booger.

– Amari Cooper caught 4 of his 7 targets for 80 yards and a touchdown. Michael Gallup and Blake Jarwin also caught touchdown passes, but didn’t do much else in the yardage or catches departments.

– Randall Cobb was 2nd on the team in targets with 8 and caught 6 of them for 35 yards. It was honestly a pretty rough night for him despite the volume. Cobb had a first quarter touchdown called back because of a penalty and fumbled as well.

– Saquon couldn’t find any room in the red zone. He was denied on 3 separate drives and finished the night with 14 carries for 28 yards, yikes. He did catch 6 passes for 67 yards. His longest catch was 65 yards, so that leaves 5 more catches for 2 yards. Hey guys, I think I know who the Cowboys game planned against.

– Evan Engram led the Giants in targets with 8. He caught 6 of them for 42 yards. Not quite as good as the first time the Giants played the Cowboys this year.

– Golden Tate made a stellar one-handed catch at the 1 yard line, but that was about it. 6 catches, 42 yards.

– Darius Slayton season is officially cancelled. Slayton caught 1 of his 4 targets for 6 yards. Gone are the days like last week where he could catch 2 passes for 2 touchdowns. It was a good run.