tyrod-taylor-bills

Greetings! To both my loyal subjects and sacrilegious haters, I humbly welcome you my life; ‘Tis true, my life revolves around the fascinating world of fantasy sports, but it’s so much deeper than that. Here, at the world’s finest fantasy sports website, Razzball, I’m able to share with you lessons of love and ecstasy, tales of heartbreak and betrayal, and possibly even some insight as to why Richard Gere enjoyed gerbils up his rectum. I cannot lie to you, my goodmen, my life is in absolute shambles right now. I cannot remember a time I felt so overwhelmed, yet I shall rise up and do my lordly duty, for I, Lord Beddict, am meant for greatness in some form or another and I shan’t be denied. WITNESS!

I am Tehol Beddict and this is Disgrace/Delight! Take Heed!

 

 

Players the Lord Believes will Delight in Week 1:

Tyrod Taylor – I’d be lying to myself and all of you fine people if I didn’t mention the fact that Tygod is going to go Green Eggs and HAM on the aging and toothless defense of the Baltimore Ravens. Being the most dangerous two-way threat in all of the land is a heavy burden for any man to carry, but the Rodfather could carry 500 pounds of hate in his fanny pack and still run for 80-plus on these peasants. I’m expecting a top-10 performance.

Robert Griffin III – Both the Eagles cornerbacks were signed out of a D-level Cheesesteak house from the Southside of Philly this offseason, so I’m buying a big day for the second-chance-at-life having, RG3. By no means am I expecting some top-five performance. What I am expecting is a solid showing and someone to consider as both a cheap DFS play and a definite two-QB format start.

Raiders Skill Position Players – When in doubt, wear a condom. When in doubt about who to start in fantasy football, you start every possible starter against the Saints defense. Latavius Murray, Michael Crabtree, Amari Cooper and even Clive Walford all need to be considered this week as this Saints defense is softer than a jellyfish d*ck.

Seahawks Skill Position Players – I’m assuming you recall the lovely Pamela Anderson deep-throating Tommy Lee on that fancy yacht a decade or two ago? Well, that’s exactly how the Dolphins are going to take the Seahawks offense in Week 1. The only gag reflex will be coming from Dolphins fans nationwide. Trust in the Lord.

Spencer Ware – With Jamaal Charles out for a little while, Ware should receive either equal or more carries than Charcandrick West. I happen to prefer Ware’s skillset against a Chargers defense, who I wouldn’t trust if my life depended on it. West received some goal line work last season, but Ware has proven to be an absolute mauler and if they can’t figure that out, and they make me look the part of the fool, I shall never forgive Andy Reid.

Carlos Hyde – In what should be a close game, Hyde should receive 20-plus carries and three-to-five receptions against an overrated Rams defense. The Rams linebacker core is soft against the run, so there’s some nice potential for a big-time game here. I’m with him.

Blaine Gabbert – Just kidding.

Ameer Abdullah – When playing the Colts, especially when their defense is more worthless and decimated than usual, one must go with the RB with game breaking ability in both the run and pass game. That, my goodmen, is like unleashing a wolf in a hen house. Make sure you have a rag handy to wipe up all the blood from this slaughter.

Terrelle Pryor – Let’s be real, nobody is starting Pryor this week… only, you should. I’m expecting six-to-eight targets and at least one touchdown. This masculine savage has finally mastered the receiver position and as I expected, many teams are going to regret passing up the chance to grab him when they had the chance. A star is born.

 

Players the Lord believes will Disgrace in Week 1:

Sam Bradford – Say one thing for Sam Bradford, he’s positively the most overvalued QB in NFL history. Why do teams keep wanting a piece of this fraud? He’s like Jeff George without the incredible arm. For the love of the Gods, he doesn’t even look like football player, much less an athlete. I was never a fan of Bradford, even when coming out of college. I just didn’t see it. Not that I’m always correct, or even close to it, but I just never saw what was so special about this guy. It’s a disgrace that Nic Cage and Christian Slater have to blow studio execs just to read for an audition, but Bradford keeps being handed starting QB jobs. It’s absolutely disgusting.

Jay Ajayi – There is absolutely nothing special here. Don’t believe what anyone tells you. The fact that the injury prone, 45-year old running back Arian Foster easily beat this guy out is telling enough. Nothing more to say here.

Ryan Tannehill – Tanny should improve under Gase, but with Parker out and facing the swarming Seattle Seahawks defense, Tannehill is in for a rough day. I’d expect multiple picks and probably a fumble on top of that. Not the week to start him. That is, unless you imagine you’d enjoy grabbing your ankles and being plugged by a scud missile.

Marcus Mariota – Facing an extremely talented Vikings defense, I expect the Titans to be extremely run oriented this week, and really every week for that matter. There’s some upside here but I’d stay away.

Jeremy Langford – I’m higher on Langford than almost anyone but I’m not feeling this matchup in any way. Let’s just stay positive and remember that Langford will be a solid option going forward. Just not in Week 1.

 

Thank you for joining me for my first edition of Disgrace/Delight. Until then, find someone you love and hold them close, for you never know when they will be ripped from your grasp. You’ve got to be realistic about these things. Football is back!

 

 

You can follow the Lord on Twitter here!

  1. William Hung says:
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    @Tehol: Wanted to pick your brain on my team (12 team .5 PPR):

    R1 – AJ Green (Miller was taken 1 spot ahead)
    R2 – A-Robinson (Le’Veon was taken 2 spots ahead)
    R3 – Randall Cobb (McCoy, Charles – not interested, and Martin all taken ahead of me)
    R4 – Greg Olsen (passed up on Rawls and Hyde because they don’t get me excited)
    R5 – Arian Foster (Latavius, Langford, Murray, and Stewart all taken ahead of me)
    R6 – Gio Bernard (Love his early schedule, debatable if I should’ve passed up Matthews)
    R7 – Danny Woodhead (Derrick Henry was taken this round, but in .5 PPR, I think I got a steal here)
    R8 – Matt Jones (I think he’s getting 20 carries a game, right? Someone sniped Tyrod Taylor here)
    R9 – Charles Sims (passed up on Benjamin, Yeldon… I feel like Tyrod killed my strategy)
    R10 – Bortles (cause only 1 other team didn’t have a QB yet and didn’t want to get stuck with Stafford or Matty Ice)
    R11 – Torrey Smith (Jay’s recommendation)
    R12 – Corey Coleman ([email protected]’s recommendation)
    R13 – Tyler Boyd (not sure what to do here so I went upside, I could’ve gone James White here but I had my next pick in mind – Really pissed Ajayi was taken right before I picked)
    R14 – Dion Lewis ([email protected]’s analysis of him had me target him. I’m not sure I have the personnel to keep him though since I’m thin at RB
    R15 – Minny
    R16 – Walsh

    So in summation
    QB – Bortles
    RB – Foster, Bernard
    WR – Green, Robinson, Cobb
    TE – Olsen
    Flex – Woodhead
    Bench:
    RB – Jones, Sims, Lewis
    WR – Smith, Coleman, Boyd

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @William Hung: MY GOODMAN!!!! I love it! honestly, baby, i do. Torrey Coleman and Boyd are all great upside guys late in the draft. absolutely love that.

      Also, you got Matt Jones in the 8th. that is an absolute steal based on my projections for him this season. A STEAL!!! ROBBERY, I SAY!!!!

      LOADED at wideout. great tight end and lot of high reception running backs to go with Foster and Jones.

      Nice work

      • William Hung says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: The rest of my leaguemates are confused by my choice of RBs since I didn’t get any elite ones, but I was telling them in .5 PPR and as late as I was getting them, I had to get ones who fit the Bernard / Woodhead mold (I have been telling people in my league that Woodhead has a huge ceiling in any PPR format) – but they don’t believe me and tell me I’m overrating the impact of .5 PPR… we’ll see what happens barring injury.

        Some fun tidbits from Yahoo’s draft recap where I got a B-:
        1. They dinged me for drafting Gio Bernard in the 60s since they ranked him just past the 100th overall mark – not sure how Bernard is 100 overall in .5 PPR and also more consistent than Jeremy Hill since he doesn’t rely on TDs for value

        2. Since I’m weak at RB, Yahoo’s #1 pick up for me is Karlos “Shawn Kemp diet” Williams

        • Tehol Beddict says:
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          @William Hung: your league mates obviously aren’t on your level of genius, my goodman.

          thanks for the Shawn Kemp reference. The Reign Man lives on forever

  2. Joel

    Papa Jean Segura says:
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    I have Langford, would you rather start any of these guys: yeldon, bilal powell, forsett, or Terrence west.

    • William Hung says:
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      @Papa Jean Segura: No need to mess with Balt’s RB situation in Week 1 when you have a solid player like Langford. Yeldon might be a good choice if Ivory isn’t going to play but I’d still roll Langford above all

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Papa Jean Segura: nope. West is intriguing but we just dont know in week one. I’d go Langford here as he’s ranked higher than all of them in my rankings.

  3. Ralph Lifshitz

    Ralph Lifshitz says:
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    When was the last time you went out with your dick tucked?

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Ralph Lifshitz: August 16th, 2016.

  4. Frank the tank says:
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    Howdy Tehol!

    Had my draft on Labor Day could you give me some insight ?

    QB: Rivers

    RB1: David Johnson
    RB2: Hyde

    WR1: Deandre Hopkins
    WR2: Keenan Allen
    WR3: Sammy Watkins

    FLex: Moncrief

    TE: I’ll be streaming here I have Jesse James

    D/St: Rams

    Kicker : Phil Dawson

    Bench: Melvin Gordon, Derrick Henry, Sterling Shepard, Chris hogan, tajae sharpe, Chris Johnson , Forsett, will fuller & Paul Perkins.

    Thoughts of dropping Dawson for any of these kickers? Matt Bryant, Cairo santos, Roberto Aguayo.

    Hold onto everyone on my bench or drop for any of these available ones?

    Available RBs: C-West, Draughn, spiller, Reggie bush, Mike Gillislee, zach zenner, artis Payne , dion Lewis

    WRs: Eli Rogers, jermaine kearse, anquan boldin, Cole Beasley , DGB, Doctson, perriman, Cecil shorts (bucs now)

    Also thoughts about adding Matt Ryan or Jameis Winston this week? Or just roll w/ rivers who’s at arrowhead?

    Thanks !

    • FrankGrimes says:
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      @Frank the tank:
      Gotta love six team leagues!

      • Frank the tank says:
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        @FrankGrimes:

        Thanks Lol?
        but it’s 10 team. What helped me out pick 1 someone drafted Edelman . Same owner round 2 drafted Travis Benjamin I kid you not.

        • LT Murray IV

          Tehol Beddict says:
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          @Frank the tank: did they mean to draft Kelvin Benjamin ?

      • LT Murray IV

        Tehol Beddict says:
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        @FrankGrimes: settle down Frank! good to see you tho

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Frank the tank: You can roll Rivers if you’d like but the other two you mentioned probably have more upside this week but you should be fine either way.

      I believe a Forsett is droppableIm more interested in a Rogers or DGB. Matt Bryant should be a great play this week in the dome. id prob dawson for either him or Aguayo. Rest of the team looks awesome, my man. great work

      • Frank the tank says:
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        @Tehol Beddict:

        Thanks Tehol!

        Also drop Forsett for Terrell Pryor? I may at the limit at WR though.

        Try & trade my Forsett for Danny woodhead?

        • Tehol Beddict says:
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          @Frank the tank: yes. Grab pryor

  5. malen says:
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    I went kind of light on RB in my 12-team standard league, wound up with Latavius, Langford and LeGarrette. I’m thinking of dropping Zach Miller (I also have Gary Barnidge) for a RB with future potential. Not someone I need right now, but who could become the workhorse in the middle of the season. Of these guys, who do you think has the most potential for THAT role?
    Chris Johnson
    Shaun Draughn
    Mike Gillislee
    Chris Thompson
    (Anyone I might be missing? Most of the obvious handcuffs/up-in-the-air committees like Steelers, Titans, Ravens, Dolphins, etc have been picked clean.)

    Another thing to consider is that we have one IR spot- would it be worth stashing Dion Lewis there, or is that just going to tempt the injury gods into making me need that slot for one of my best players?

    Basically, I could do Lewis in my IR (giving up nothing) AND / OR one of those dudes for Zach Miller. Any thoughts? Thanks!

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @malen: It would have to be Chris Johnson on a David Johnson injury. Thompson is a player I like but it’s not ppr obviously. Draughn is interesting because if the niners are down a lot he could play a ton of passing downs. he would prob never take over as lead back tho. would have to be a Chris Johnson

  6. James says:
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    “Ware should receive either equal or more carries than Charcandrick West”

    Splitting time with West, Ware is ranked 10 spots higher than Rashad Jennings, who projects as a feature back out of the gates? I get why Ware might look great but what’s the rationale for Jennings being so low?

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @James: thanks for pointing out that poorly written and unedited sentence, James. I just like Ware to perform well this week and im obviously banking on a TD or two. ON the other hand, you are correct in the thinking I have Jennings too low. It’s not often I admit this but going against Dallas, he should have a decent day. I may update. thanks for noticing…..but if there was a rationale I suppose it would be that he’s aging and hasnt shown a ton. Still like the player.

  7. FrankGrimes says:
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    We battling on some draft kings again this year?

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @FrankGrimes: I would love to. Sadly it’s illegal here. we’d have to post the lineups here strictly for fun or i could paypal you no problemo.

      • Joey Jo Jo Jr Shabadoo says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: this is MUCH better as you’d dodge the bookie-like 10% juice.

  8. PaulZone says:
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    Cam or Tyrod?

    Rawls or Micha?

    Drop which one for Pryor out of Davante Parker, Aiken or Sims?

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @PaulZone:

      great questions. All have similar answers: I have Tyrod ranked a spot ahead of Newton this week simply because of Denver’s filthy defense. But again, I have Tyrod higher this week.

      I have Rawls ranked higher at the moment but Michael is being listed as the starting RB right now so I have no way of actually knowing this. I’m still leaning Rawls. like all those players but i suppose it would be Simms depending on how deep your RB spot is and if tis ppr

      • PaulZone says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: Thanks. I just read Rawls will play sparingly like only 15 plays or so?

        It’s 0.5 ppr, and my rbs are jennings, rawls, michael, langford, matt jones and leveon bell. I consider that good depth so Sims can go!

        Not sure I can sit Cam. Ugh. Maybe Semen sucks enough abd gives Cam some extre scoring opps!

        • Tehol Beddict says:
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          @PaulZone: yep. We got to switch this to Michael here.

          Lucky cam got that short TD for ya

  9. justin says:
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    hey who should i start this week in my flex spot?. michael crabtreee or michael floyd? (standard scoring btw)
    and also who to start from: jeremy hill, ameer abdullah, or rashad jennings. i can also start 2 of them if i dont start any of the above WR.

    • PaulZone says:
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      @justin: crabtree and jennings

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @justin: Crabtree is the play tho I like Floyd sneakiness.

      Jennings is the guy this week safest play. Abdullah has my thong wet tho as he gets shot to destroy Colts defense

  10. Dom says:
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    Assumed I would be starting Eli as my QB2 but you make a convincing case and I am strongly considering going against ECR and playing Tyrod over Eli this week

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Dom: Dom, i dont think you could go wrong either way this week as I love both matchups….well, technically you could, i just dont think you will.

  11. Mike says:
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    I’m trying to get as many opinions as I can on this:

    I’ve got deangelo Williams in my FLEX, which I need to fill come week 4. With Gronk as my TE, I drafted Colby fleener as an insurance policy. I was thinking about proposing fleener for ryan Matthews(is that a fair deal? I think fleener’s value increased coming to NO). I’m not looking for a superstar, just someone who’s serviceable at the position.

    Or, should I hang on to fleener and slide Allen Hurns into my FLEX week 4? I’ve got mike Evans and Doug baldwin in my other WR slots. I do like Jax this year.

    Thoughts?

    • Mike says:
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      @Mike: I forgot to include that Ryan Matthews current owner would be getting an upgrade with fleener at the TE position with this deal.

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Mike: Yes, Hurns has been great. not a problem to slide in there at all. If you can get ANY value for Fleener go ahead and do so. horrible pre season and has struggled picking up the playbook. Trade if possible

  12. Brian says:
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    I got a decision to make its Ware or Abdullah .5 ppr league it wasn’t a decision until I read your post regarding Abdullah you got me believing in him to shred Indy what would you do ?

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Brian: wow, tough call. I love em both this week. Ware seems like safer bet for a touchdwon no question. Abdullah has very high upside tho. who are you starting above them?

  13. RePete says:
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    You seem to like Matt Jones more than most this week against the Steelers. Should I chase that upside or play the safer option of Bernard at the Jets? I could always drop Wheaton for the backup on Monday if he doesn’t start. (.5 PPR League)

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @RePete: I prefer Jones this week personally. Bernard not a bad option tho

  14. TTRA1N says:
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    My final prseason roster please rate.
    12tm 2QB ppr 6pt td pass league
    QB R.Wilson
    RB D.Johnson
    RB CJ Anderson
    WR K.Allen
    WR B.Cooks
    TE G.Olsen
    FLEX M.Floyd
    OP M.Mariota
    D/ST Rams
    K Prater
    BENCH C.Wentz, R.Jennings, I.Crowell, K.White, D.Parker, C.Michael

    Also would you start the line up I have for this week? I was offered Luck for K.Allen but I don’t know if my lack of Depth can afford the hit? Would appreciate the insight.

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @TTRA1N: say BRUH, ur stacked up and about to be racked up if this is a money league . U are absolutely loaded. No need to trade for Luck. U have Russell Wilson the God. And Allen ur best wideout. Nice showing from Cj Anderson eh? Ur killin it

  15. Chucky says:
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    PPR Gates or Walford? Snead or Floyd? RGIII or Winston? 6 pts TD

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Chucky: Gates, Floyd, Winston

  16. Bryce Krispie Treats says:
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    Thanks for the list! These are always more reliable than the FLAMES/LAMES articles by yahoo… haha

    Could you pick 1 for me in a 12 team ppr flex spot?

    Legarrette Blount
    Steve Smith
    Derrick Henry (Im infatuated with him)

    TE spot — Bennett or Walford?

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Bryce Krispie Treats: FLames and Lanes LMAOOOOOOOOO that’s how I do, Krispie!

      I like Bennett if Gronk doesnt play otherwise go with Walford. I love Henry but fairly tough matchup. I’ll stick with him as uncertainty over Smith. If Smith is starting tho, id go with him highest floor

  17. powerade says:
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    Similar to Jay’s rankings – there is no tab for the PPR rankings.

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @powerade: that’s weird! I published them. check fantasypros.com for my full shizz

  18. Pu$$y Control says:
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    Goddammit Gronkowski. Something I hope not to keep saying over and over in 2016.

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Pu$$y Control: it happens! ive been there. think he’ll overcome this one tho

  19. Pu$$y Control says:
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    On a scale of 1-5, with 5 being the stupidest. How stupid would I be to trust Carson Palmer at home vs. a shorthanded Patriots team instead of Derrick Carr on the road at the Saints? I have David Johnson and Fitzgerald but also have Crabtree. Something inside of me says trust your elders at home early on and leave the hot snatch for later.

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Pu$$y Control: not stupid at all. Carson is always going to eat and is actually a safer option. Both are nice plays. Exactly, trust in the Elders my son and you shall be rewarded with immense riches

  20. #flytheW says:
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    I’m in a 12 team yardage n scoring PPR superflex I try to start 2 qb’s my question is would you pick up will fuller ? My wr are cobb, cooks,decker, v jax n marvin jones. I don’t want to drop any of them except maybe drop v jax. My RB’s I’m not sure who is droppable for him. I have forte, yeldon, jennings, crowell, b powell and chris Thompson from washington. He might be the guy I would drop for fuller… any suggestions? Btw I can start 2,3 or 4 wr. Thx for the help !!

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @#flytheW: thompson is only guy id drop for him and im totally fine with that

  21. Pu$$y Control says:
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    Tajae Sharpe? Pick him up over Funchess for depth with upside or hold?

  22. John says:
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    First time playing fantasy football, how does my team look? Any changes you’d suggest? 10 team espn standard scoring

    Qb – brees
    Rb- forte and matthews
    Wr – odell and jordy nelson
    Te- fleener
    Flex – b cooks
    D- vikings
    K- that bucs rookie

    Bench
    Jamaal charles, derrick henry, spencer ware
    Devante parker, kevin white, jordan matthews
    Marcus mariota

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @John: why did you wait so long to play the greatest game ever invented!!! other than World of Warcraft and General Chaos that is. nice bench. dont love starting RBS but Charles should be back and like Ware early and Henry late. nice mix of elite receivers and high upside young guys. I like what you’ve done for the most part

      • John says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: Would you start Ware over Forte or Matthews? I’m pretty confident that I’ll win week 1, but after that it gets harder.

        • Tehol Beddict says:
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          @John: Ryan Matthews? I’d go with him

  23. Mel

    Littlecf24 says:
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    Lord Beddict,

    Please tell me everything will be ok in Tyrod land.

    Thank you

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