Where my RazzBowlers at? No, not you fine-looking gentlemen in the front in your bowler hats — y’all simmer down with your fancy headwear. I’m talking about the roughest, toughest imaginary sports managers out there: my RazzBowl peeps. I’m gonna need your powers of manifestation to propel me two spots ahead into the final cutline. Come on, will Tyler Conklin to fantasy glory! OK, OK, my team looks like The Walking Dead, but at least I’m a survivor. Part of my “still in it to win it” status derives from the fact that I get to write this sweet “injury report” every week. As long as y’all are still showing up, I’ll show up and help out. If we run out of steam and I enter my full winter hibernation, then feel free to swing back to this article as the weeks pass and ask questions. Unlike your thankless dog that will wag its tail for any ol’ Joe that drops a handful of steak, I’m still here for you! 

Week 13 Injury Report and Roster News

Justin FieldsDa Bears are 32nd in passing yards and 1st in rushing yards in the NFL. Of course, this is all thanks to David Montgomery, right? [stares at Anakin Skywalker] Right? Fields missed last week with a shoulder injury, which doesn’t really matter because he doesn’t pass. In Fields’ place, Trevor Siemian first was going to start, then he got injured in warmups and was going to be benched in favor of record-setting backup Nathan Peterman, and then Siemian probably bit a bullet and took a shot of whiskey and went out to throw a completely adequate game. These things happen, and now they’re in the past. Fields is back for week 13 with no injury designation, just in time to save your fantasy team for the playoffs. Start Fields in all formats. 

Matthew Stafford: He’s still out, and the Bryce Perkins experiment is over due to the return of John Wolford. Meh. Everything is an avoid for the Rams this week in regular fantasy football. Wolford has put up fantasy-usable games in the past…if 230 yards is considered fantasy-worthy. We should see Stafford back to finish out the regular season, but the Rams look like they’re just trying out players for 2023 at this point. Avoid all Rams for week 13. 

Odell Beckham Jr.: The guy might as well be on Elon’s Musk plane for all the traveling he’s doing. Wait, is he allowed on planes anymore? ENYWHEY. Beckham has met with a ton of teams and hasn’t signed with any of them yet, which probably means he’s waiting to get a good feel of who is going to the playoffs. The truth is that Beckham is fantasy garbaggio — his numbers in 2021’s high-flying Rams offense look kind of like those moments where tight ends get hot [take that SEO optimization!] and then everybody adds them as their “play of the weak.” See what I did there? TD variance saved Beckham’s 2021, but let’s take a look at that fabled home stretch: 8 games, 27 catches, 305 yards. So, 3 catches and 38 yards per game. Woot woot! Sure, the talent is (was?) there for ODB, but much like Julio Jones (who just topped 200 yards on the 2022 season), we’re talking about a player that’s likely your bench fodder or DFS hype play. Avoid ODB for 2022 and let somebody else waste their roster spot on him. 

Aaron RodgersI mean, I like a good farewell party. I didn’t mind it when Jeter did his farewell, or Kobe, or Jaromir Jagr…wait, is Jagr still playing? ARog may not be gone in 2023, but whatever’s going on in Green Bay likely won’t continue. Jordan Love — the guy drafted before Jalen Hurtshas earned nearly $12 million to carry a tablet and throw less than 100 NFL passes. Meanwhile, ARog has a worse QB Rating than Jared Goff and a worse QBR than Zach Wilson. ARog has fewer yards per game than Andy Dalton, and a completion percentage sandwiched between Ryan Tannehill and Daniel Jones. And all of this is to say: ARog looks like he’s going to play this week. Packers coach Matt LeFleur did the usual coach-speak thing of “We won’t let him get hurt,” but there’s no hiding that Rodgers is cooked and the Packers are suffering as a team because of it. This is great news for my Vikings fandom and awful news for all of my Aaron Jones-powered teams. 

Deshaun WatsonWell, here we are. Y’all know he’s a creep among creeps. He hasn’t played professional football since 2020, and he’s taking over a Cleveland Browns team that is top 5 in the league in rushing categories. I think it’s fair to say Watson has no “home” team — wherever he goes, he’ll be booed. Sure, load up your DFS lineups with Watson this week — he’s $6500 on DraftKings at the time of writing, which is a statistical value. But for most regular fantasy football teams that are in a critical spot to make the playoffs — Watson doesn’t make sense. You’ve got Kirk Cousins or Kenny Pickett or even Jimmy Garoppolo available in a ton of leagues. Jimmy G is the QB13 on the year — that means, the #1 backup QB in the league, and he’s available in 50%+ of leagues. Who are you going to trust your fantasy playoffs with: Watson, who hasn’t thrown a pass in 2 years and everybody hates him, or Jimmy G., who everybody loves and is basically the Derek Carr of 2022? Also, Derek Carr is QB15 on the year so don’t act like you’re offended. I’m passing on Watson for week 13, and I’d recommend you do, too. 

Joe Mixon / Ja’Marr ChaseJMC was supposed to be back last week and then got an OUT designation after the Friday publication. Don’t blame me; I’m just the messenger! Mixon and Chase — who each missed last week — are listed as questionable for week 13. Each player has a good chance to play this week, which will inevitably mean that sometime on Saturday afternoon they’ll somehow contract diphtheria and miss the game. Just my luck! In Mixon’s absence last week, Samaje Perine put in a workman-like 3.4 yards per carry on his way to a cool 58 yards on the ground and a TD, while the absence of Chase allowed Perine to net 7 targets and 4 receptions. If Mixon is absent and Chase returns, Perine’s numbers would likely take a hit. In fact, Perine has a worse ranking this week than…

Zonovan KnightApparently, the Jets have completely run out of fuel running backs, and the undrafted Zonovan Knight is slated to take the RB1A duties for week 13. With a name like that, how could anything go Zrong? Consider in 12+ team leagues only. 

All right, friends! Here’s hoping you make it to the fantasy playoffs. I’m hoping a combination of Mack Hollins and Tyler Conklin get me over the RazzBowl cutline. Good luck to you (and me!).