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Well, if your life wasn’t already macabre, morose, and too full of malaise, last night’s riveting (ludicrous) game was just for you. While the idea of these two teams playing in prime time was a little bit hard to swallow, I just pretended they were battling for the all important right to permanently move to England. It added some motivation to what was essentially a football game of two color schemes trying to kill off all the epileptics in the world. In what was a close 19-13 game, the Jaguars pulled out the win in such a fashion that I think we should all find something experimentally to snort. Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if Satan recorded that game to show it on loop in Hell for the next few millennia… At least next Thursday is Thanksgiving. Food, booze and actual football! (I hope…)

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Blake Bortles – 21/30, 242 YDS, 1 TD, 1 INT and 2 CAR, 9 YDS. Blake Blind Bortles of ‘Bama! Blake Butterfinger Bortles! Just when you thought the Jags couldn’t find a quarterback worse than Blaine Gabbert

Allen Hurns – 3 REC, 19 YDS. I couldn’t even tell if Hurns was injured, ineffective, or was just tired of playing in that game.

Marcus Mariota – 22/35, 231 YDS and 5 CAR, 29 YDS, 1 TD. The ghost of Steve McNair wouldn’t have made this game watchable.

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Delanie Walker – 8 REC, 109 YDS. I believe I speak for all of us when I say that I envy the color blind. I CALL THIS GAME “MODERN ART”, BECAUSE IT FEATURED A LOT OF UGLY COLORS, WAS BORING AS HELL, AND I COULDN’T FIGURE OUT WHAT I WAS LOOKING AT.

 

Final Thought

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Why did we watch this? We’re only encouraging them. We should tell a responsible adult where the Thursday Night Game touched us…

 

 

  1. brett says:
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    Jay,

    Able to trade a dynasty player for draft picks. Can you rank these guys in a dynasty ppr format 12 teams.

    Brady round 3
    Wilson round 6
    Diggs round 6
    Hurns round 6
    Matt Jones round 10
    Jordan Reed round 6

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @brett: Diggs, Jones, Hurns, Brady, Wilson, Reed. The first three are really really close.

  2. El Jefe says:
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    What made it even better was Simms and nantz hyping up both teams so much that you would think that they were both undefeated! How many times can you hear about how great both defenses were, and not to mention that front four of Tennessee!!!

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @El Jefe: Possible AFC playoff preview!

  3. Brett says:
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    Thoughts on cj Anderson is he worth holing on too?

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Brett: Depending on what’s out there, I’m motivated to hold a bit longer.

  4. Steve Stevenson says:
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    ROS (esp. playoffs) standard scoring, pick one WR and one RB for my bench:

    RB – J. Bell (playoff sked @StL, @NO, SF), T. Coleman (@Car, @Jax, Car) or J. White (@Hou, Ten, @NYJ)
    WR – Aiken (Sea, KC, Pit), Tate (@StL, @NO, SF), Snead (@TB, Det, Jax), M. Jones (Pit, @SF, @Den) or Funchess (Atl, @NYG, @Atl)

  5. Hometown Heroes says:
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    I’ve got a shot to acquire Megatron with a team out of contention (12 team keeper standard scoring). I am pretty well stocked at wr. I have Hopkins, M Bryant, Mi Floyd, and J Matthews. I would probably include Eifert($1) since I have gronk. What are your thoughts on Calvin the ROS? Is he even worth grabbing with the WR I have? Thanks again

    • Steve Stevenson says:
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      @Hometown Heroes: Megatron has a great ROS schedule (all dome games, including @NO and vSF in wks 15-16). If the rest of your roster is good enough to compete, he could put it over the top.

  6. Scott says:
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    Thanks Jay, I needed that. ROFL

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Scott: any time!

  7. Brett says:
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    Rather cj Anderson or drauhn on your roster ppr I do have Hyde too

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Brett: Draughn if you have Hyde. Otherwise, I would have said CJ.

  8. Cheese Eating Surrender Monkey says:
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    best add in a .2 PPR (yeah, 1/5th PPR, weird shite here) basically a standard. can only own 6 RB at any time, have to start 3, 2 flexes, but even after losing allen my WR/TE are so strong i pretty much have to bench a way better one of those than i have to start a RB, at least since hyde’s been out.
    have hyde/ingram/shady/m.jones (having to start this week yuck)/andrews/denard dog (added him only to see if yeldon got hurt, i didn’t start him). i can drop denard dog now for one of these (and these probably are all more useful, but maybe not)
    powell/hightower (is he ingram’s backup, looking so)/fozzy/rid dick/j.allen are options.

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