Folx, it is my 100th article here on the fantasy football side of Razzball! I can’t believe that I ended up outpacing baseball with my football content. It’s like my left hand doesn’t know what my right hand is doing. ACKSHUALLY, what is my right hand doing? Oh, typing. What about? Oh yeah, there was a football game last night. Peyton and Eli decided to re-start their Monday Night Football viewing sessions in honor of my 100th article. Hey, Donkey Teeth! Can we make this article into an NFT? Maybe Peyton will buy it and I’ll finally be able to retire to Razzball Island (located near Easter Island, FYI). ENYWHEY. Let’s check out what happened on Monday Night Football:
Tom Brady: Showed up on the Peyton/Eli stream and was kind enough to not mention to the televised audience that he outscored the Seahawks and Saints by himself the previous day. ACKSHAULLY, Brady more than doubled the Seahawks/Saints score just by himself. Yeesh. Some Zennial in the NFL offices looked at the matchups this year and told an exec: “These games suck. You sent the Jets to London? Jameis Winston on Monday Night? Put Peyton Manning on TV and have him invite NFL players on because otherwise nobody’s watching this mess. Oh, and make sure Eli gets wasted by the end of the first quarter.” Sorry Saints/Seahawks fans: Tom Brady was about the only interesting thing that happened during the Monday Night game.
Jameis Winston: The Joey Wright told me he would be staying up until negative 2 o’clock his time on the Hurricane Coast so he could write up Jameis Winston. Did you read his take yet? Here’s my take: Woof. 85 passing yards in the first half and he’s sorely missing Michael Thomas. Thomas is still 2-3 weeks away from return. On the plus side, Tre’Quan Smith re-appeared on Monday Night Football. On the downside, he did exactly zilch as Winston put up 222 yards and a TD. Yawn.
Alvin Kamara: We love Kamara at Razzball, and that’s because he’s the #1 wideout on the Saints. 10 catches, 128 yards, a TD, and a cheese basket filled with all the good stuff and none of the smelly stuff or those cheeses where they infuse it with lingonberry or other junk. Saints fans should love a good sci-fi because they need to be fans of Kamara in Space. Kamara on the ground put up less than 3 yards per carry, which means he basically trucked forward one step before falling down.
DK Metcalf: Oh, did we have something fantasy-relevant happen? DK did his thing, which is a bit more impressive when Russ is passing the ball. Does Russ even return this year, or does he just settle down with the injury and call into Peyton and Eli in Week 15?
DK Metcalf putting up 15.4 fantasy points on just one play. #stud pic.twitter.com/MZ1LGsCCML
— Michael Fabiano (@Michael_Fabiano) October 26, 2021
Well folx, it was a snoozer. 13-10 Saints, which thrilled those people who started the team DEF and left the rest of us wondering how much longer until pumpkin spice season ends. Have an awesome week, and I’ll see you for the primer!