The rumors of Michael Turner’s death have been greatly exaggerated. Last night he looked like he took Marshawn Lynch’s beast mode and Spike Jonzed it onto the big screen. He’s still what he is; a big, fast, straight ahead runner who will blow a crease up into a thousand pieces.
Matt Ryan: I mentioned that his schedule was getting tough and that you should trade him, well, it’s probably too late now. He’s not going to have games like this every week from here on out, but it will be hard for him to lead your team to a championship. Oh, and the Saints will get you turnovers! You heard it here, um, last.
Steve Slaton: Kubiak says that all three running backs will play. He told Slaton to keep his chin up because they’ll need him. I told Kubiak to keep his chin up because I want it exposed for when I give him a sucker punch and then run away. Kubiak will play whoever he thinks will win him the game; selfish bastard.
George Kokonis: The Brown’s GM was fired. Yeah, this will make them better real soon.
Darren McFadden: He was seen making cuts in practice and has a bye week to get ready for a bad Chiefs team. We’ll have to see how he looks in practice, but he could be ready to go. In case he’s been dropped, pick him up.
Chris Chambers: He was given his walking papers by the Chargers. Malcolm Floyd was already starting ahead of him, but now people who don’t pay attention in your leagues might start looking at him, so you probably need to snatch him up.
Pierre Thomas: He looked like the better back last night because he is. He still split time with Mike Bell, but I believe we’ll see more and more of Thomas. The cream usually rises to the top and then gives you diabetes, but hey, it’s good.
Calvin Johnson: Coach Schwartz says he isn’t sure if Megatron will be able to go next week. That doesn’t sound great, but Schwartz isn’t going to tell us anything useful anyway. I think he’ll go since he was practicing last week. If he doesn’t, his injury is more severe than they are letting on and he probably shouldn’t be practicing anyway. And if I were Optimus Prime, this would be my chance!
Maurice Morris: He had a decent game after Kevin Smith was hurt against the Rams, but my brother in-law who “could have gone pro if not for a bad knee” could have had a decent game against the Rams. But anyway you look at it, Kevin Smith has not been 100% for much of this year. If you are hurting for RB’s pick Mo Mo up.
Anquan Boldin: He is perpetually dinged up and I don’t see him going against Chicago. Breaston will be a good play if that happens.
Reggie Bush: He strolled into the endzone last night, but he barely sees the ball anymore. Even with the occasional touchdown you can’t feel good about starting him with his total lack of looks.