Kyle Orton: He was booed in camp for ineptitude.  There is currently some kid booing me as I write this in a coffeeshop.  Orton has too many weapons in Denver to not put up decent fantasy numbers.  He’s a good #2 QB to have unless some jerk reaches for him.  Shut up kid!

Knowshon Moreno: He agreed to a deal with Denver just to end the constant punning of his name, but I think I’ll keep it up just to spite him as I know he is an avid reader.  No Show will win the starting running back job unless he gets a bad, year long case of broken foot.  McDaniels has used RB’s in some ways fake footballers are not too keen on, but he is also the reason Denver no longer has Jay Cutler and the reason they drafted No Show first, so he needs to show that No Show was worth it and that he was a genius in drafting him.  It’s very good that he signed sooner than later and we should see a solid year out of him.

Michael Crabtree: In a Billy Carter/Roger Clintonesque move his cousin said Crabtree might sit out the season and reenter the draft next year.  Everyone and their dog denied this, but Crabtree is looking pretty foolish in this holdout right now.

Brandon Jones: He was looking strong in 49ers camp, but now will be out for 8 weeks, not like your dad who went to the liquor store to pick up some smokes kinda out, but you know, fractured shoulder kinda out.

Robert Meachem: Looking great in training camp according to people that sit all day at training camp.   The wide receiver situation in New Orleans is always one to follow and if Meachem can somehow overtake Moore it would be news, but I’m sticking with Moore for now with a possible flier pick on Meachem in deeper drafts.

Kurt Warner: He says he’s 85% after his offseason hip surgery.  Warner could surprise us again and last the whole season while throwing strikes to his all world receivers, but it’s really hard to believe.  I could see him lasting all season if the NFL makes some rule changes and allows Power Chairs on the field.

Harry Douglas: He’s done for the season.  In other news Roddy White was seen pricing a Bugatti Veyron.

Reggie Bush: He just called it quits with his long time girlfriend Kim Kardashian which of course has nothing at all to do with anything of any importance whatsoever.  He also supposedly has to leave practice to ice his “knee” as a precautionary measure and not because it hurts and is swollen.   Whatever is going on it doesn’t sound great for Reggie and boosts Pierre Thomas’ value.

DeSean Jackson: Has apparently been amazing in camp so far.  I have been a little skeptical of Jackson because of his size, but he’s proved me wrong so far.  He should improve his numbers from last season and help McNabb’s numbers until they get to the playoffs where Donovan will choke on some Campbells soup.

Alex Smith: Looks like Smith is in the lead for the 49er QB job.  In similar news there are some roofer job openings in Phoenix.

Eddie Royal: Brandon Marshall has yet to practice due to a leg issue, probably from his offseason surgery.  Royal is getting all the work with Orton and there is talk that he could be the de facto #1 with many plays drawn up just for him.  For the throngs waiting for our overall rankings, blame shizz like this!

Eli Manning: He just signed a 7 year 106 million dollar contract which about half should go to David Tyree who is on the verge of being cut.

Chris Brown: Breaking news.  Still not injured.

Razzball Commenter Leagues: We’re pretty much full except for two slots open in the Virgins League.  If you are fairly new to fantasy football and want to get in on the Razzball Football fun give Iowa Cubs a shout.

  1. The Peoples Champ

    The Peoples Champ says:

    By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS (CP) – 9 hours ago
    BETHLEHEM, Pa. — Philadelphia Eagles wide receiver DeSean Jackson has hyperextended his right knee in practice.
    Jackson fell awkwardly Saturday after getting tangled up with cornerback Asante Samuel during a full-squad drill.
    The second-year pro walked the length of the field with head trainer Rick Burkholder before being carted to the locker room. Jackson was able to put weight on his leg after practice, but the knee was heavily wrapped.

  2. Doc

    Doc says:

    @The Peoples Champ: Yeah, I saw that. I kinda doubt it will be lingering, but you never know.

  3. shydog says:

    i think the verb you’re looking for concerning donovan’s soup is puke,not choke.

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