It's gonna be a long year for these Cowboys...

I talked about this on the pod a little bit, but when you look at this game, you really wonder why the hell it’s in prime time. Sure, several months ago, this might have looked good on paper… maybe? I don’t blame Jay Cutler as much as Bears fans do, Alshon Jeffery is a lot of star power… but there’s not much else there that your general football fan might recognize. And the Cowboys? Yeah, they usually anchor any prime time game with Bryant, Romo, and Witten… yeah, the match-up would have made some sense if you squinted really hard… but boy, now that we’re here… Wow. Jay Cutler is doubtful for the game, leaving us in the derpiest of all time periods: “Hoyer Time”. Jeremy Langford is not who we thought he was, and even over on the Cowboys side, Tony Romo is out (for his career, if we care about his future aspects to live the rest of his life in a healthy fashion), leaving something called Dak in charger. Ezekial Elliot is suffering from some rookie over-hype (made of phrase, I’m sure), and Jason Garrett is still head coach. I’m sorry, why are we watching this game tonight?

 

Drinking Game

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Take one sip of your drink if…

The camera shows Tony Romo sitting on the bench causally watching the jumbotron.

NBC shows a promo for that stupid show about a tatoo’d woman, or for any of their “Chicago” shows. All 213 of them.

Cris Collinsworth fellates a lineman.

Jason Garrett calls a dumb toss, reverse, or draw on a 3rd-and-five or more.

Brian Hoyer runs for his life and then makes a hasty decision.

Al Michaels says “YUUUUUUUUUGE” in any context.

Finish your drink if…

Jerry Jones is seen in the booth with a surly look.

Bob Costas gets smarmy. Finish another drink if he’s wearing a sweater vest.

You get really confused why they keep showing this old white guy on the sideline, and then remember that Lovie Smith isn’t the coach anymore.

 

Totally Legitimate Game Prediction

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Bears – 0 (That may look like a zero, but it’s really the “o” in between LOL.)

Cowboys – 27 (The amount of Daks it takes to make it to the center. I don’t know what that means.)

 

 

  1. jayhawks24 says:
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    Sup, Jay?
    PPR and I have a 14pt lead going into tonight.
    He has Dez, I’ve got Bailey blasting them thru uprights. Do I risk rolling with game time decision Snead tomorrow, or throw Beasley’s pasty ass out there for the guarantee? Nobody else to plug tomorrow.

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      Hmm, good question. I’d say Snead, but that makes me a little nervous. But then again, you have Dez starting. Safe play is Dez and Beasley, so someone gets points… if that’s what you’re looking for. Upside play is Snead.

  2. Brian says:
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    I’m #2 on waiver wire is it time to start believing in Wentz and grab him since all I have is Flaco. Or should I pick up Smallwood ? Wentz looks like a QB I can trust or cousins is available as well. Thanks

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Brian: Smallwood is nice if you need a RB, but I’d want an upgrade for Flacco. Wentz is in a safe zone for now after beating Pitt, so I’m down.

  3. nightpandas says:
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    Jay,

    Pondering a trade, 12 team keep 3 (no more than one per position), start 2 wr, 2 rb, 1 flex

    I would give Hopkins, Cooper, Bortles and Hyde

    I get Fitz, Wallace, Palmer, Gurley

    My starting qb is Winston, my other receiver is Dez, my other rb’s are Vereen, Yeldon, Ajayi, Dw Washington, Asiata

    Is the RB upgrade worth it?

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @nightpandas: Oooo, how interesting. I think I’d do it if I had the ingredients to go for this year. You are giving up three potential keepers… but you’d probably only keep Hopkins and Cooper. This way, you can go Dez, Gurley and whatever. But I kinda like holding onto Hopkins, Cooper, and Dez…

      Tough one. If I think I can hold it together and still stay in it without Gurley, I’m holding.

      • nightpandas says:
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        @Jay: For my keepers I can only keep 1 per position so only one WR, if that makes any difference…

        • Jay

          Jay says:
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          @nightpandas: Oh, yeah, that sorta does. Hmm, I’m intrigued. Maaaan, I’m too scared to say yes to this. If it were me, I’d hold, but maybe there’s a better middle ground for you here?

  4. Let Us Now Praise Famous Death Dwarves says:
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    DAMMNIT, and i JUST dropped pryor in 12 team 2 QB dynasty due to mccown getting hurt last week. how with coleman out, and pryor playing QB again, this could end up being the kind of player that wins championships. i overspent and spent 19 on mckinnon (but long term this will have been cheap. 100 total starting budgets. PPR
    QB rodgers/rodfather/osweiler (soooo glad he finally got ranked higher by everybody)/gabbert
    RB (start 2) forte/ingram/mathews/mckinnon/forsett/ivory
    WR (start 3) nelson/d-jax/edelman/treadwell/crowder (who i dropped pryor for)
    TE j.thomas/ertz
    2 flexes
    IR allen/woodhead
    only got 69/100 left, the only person with less is the AP owner who spent way too much on some sub par guys early in year (every day waivers). sounding like only way pryor ISN’T big value now is gordon comes back, mccown doesn’t, and coleman faster than we think. gotta be all fast acting and such (dropped pryor right after the mccown thing)

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Let Us Now Praise Famous Death Dwarves: It wasn’t a crazy move there. I probably would have recommended it… I’ll be honest, didn’t see anything like this coming from Pryor, but keep in mind that the Dolphins look incredibly bad right now. That being said, if they do use him like this, I think he’s worth picking back up… but I’m also comfortable letting someone else buy into the hype. Still a lot of risk there.

      • Let Us Now Praise Famous Death Dwarves says:
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        @Jay: my guess is an owner who’s having to start s.hill (came into league right before our 4 round draft and forgot that he probably should’ve just drafted ANYBODY who plays QB rather than shepard/henry (TEN)) and thus far hasn’t offered me anything decent for gabbert will probably go nuts and spend like 22 or so if he notices that pryor just played QB with WR eligility. this owner is smart and i brought him into league (albeit he looked stupid not noticing that he should’ve drafted QB’s in a 2 QB league)

  5. William Hung says:
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    @Jay – 2 game losing streak to run my record to 1-2… Thinking of trying to see if I can trade Bortles for Tyrod Taylor… I’m at a loss at how terrible this team has played out the past couple of weeks.

    I finally got good production out of A-Rob and AJ Green, but Cobb screwed me hard. Good news is that someone in my league inexplicably dropped Rashad Jennings so my waiver claim will finally be used. Dropping Torrey Smith and rolling with an all RB bench to see if I can swing a trade or 2 for a WR.

    As long as nobody gets hurt, I like where my team is sans Bortles and Cobb. I think me hopping on the Dwayne Washington bandwagon is going to pay off dividends. He was solid today.

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @William Hung: Do me a favor and list me out your entire team again if you have the chance.

      Yeah, pick up Jennings for sure. I’m fine with the Bortles for Tyrod move too… if it’s just Cobb, you should be okay.

      • William Hung says:
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        @Jay:
        QB – Bortles
        WR – Green, A-Rob, Cobb
        RB – Bernard, Sims
        TE – Olsen
        FLEX – V. Cruz
        Bench
        RB – Matt Jones, Arian Foster, Dion Lewis, Dwayne Washington
        WR – Torrey Smith

        • Jay

          Jay says:
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          @William Hung: Yeah, besides your bench getting trashy, this isn’t terrible. Just need some guys to wake up… I’m not fretting super hard here.

          • William Hung says:
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            @Jay: I think my bench is solid as long as I can play the match ups. Matt Jones finished with a solid line today against the G-Men and Dwayne Washington is my lotto ticket who has a good chance of cashing out. If I end up with Rashad Jennings, that’ll be huge too (fingers crossed on that #2 waiver priority)

            I play in a .5 PPR league, so D-Lew is my late season lotto ticket. What a 180 this team has become. Out of the draft, my WRs were deep but then injuries and suckiness happened (Cobb, Torrey Smith, Corey Coleman, Tyler Boyd) and now i’m looking like i’ll be rolling deep in RBs

            • Jay

              Jay says:
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              @William Hung: Yeah, moreso Foster and Lewis being empty spots right now.

              • William Hung says:
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                @Jay: oh crap – i forgot i dropped Nelson Agholor this morning and picked up the Cowboys D… which means I am carrying 2 DEF right now. So my waiver is Cowboys D for Rashad Jennings and Torrey Smith is still on my team.

                I’ll be asking on Tuesday who I should drop Torrey for

  6. Jerry says:
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    Hey, Jay! Beasley or Dorsett in a full point ppr league? Thanks!

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Jerry: I think Beasley right now. Him and Dak appear to have a rapport.

  7. Who am I? says:
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    in a 12 team 0.5 PPR league with 3 WR, 2 RB, and 2 Flex + $100 for waiver budget…

    How much would you spend to to get Jordan Howard? Haha the owner just dropped him before this week. Is he worth the whole $100?

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Who am I?: Not the entire stash. Double check with our FAAB guy on Tuesday, but I think 30-45 might be a good idea if you’re desperate for a RB.

      • Who am I? says:
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        @Jay: Haha thank you, our waiver wire is pretty desolate right now so I might do a little more than that but thanks for the estimate!

        • Jay

          Jay says:
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          @Who am I?: Yeah, this is all league specific, so if you feel you need to do more, that’s justified.

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