I would normally blame NBC for not flexing out of a football game no one really wants to watch outside of their home markets, but this time, I’ll go ahead and fault the true culprits of what will probably be a heinous three hours of drunk-time. And that’s the city of New York. Today marks the first day that NBC could have flexed, and they chose not to because the game will be host to the largest local market in America. Instead, the Bengals and Seahawks game probably should have been the Sunday Night Football game, but I’m not sure anybody lives in Ohio, so I guess it’s a sound business decision. So we get another 49ers prime-time game, which actually might be a good thing, seeing as how their only win (and only game they didn’t give up 70 touchdowns) was the Monday Night Football opener. They also get a Giants team, which I’m sure is still holding plenty of NFC East derp in their reserves, and for this game to be anything close to entertaining, I believe it’s time to release said derp for the masses. Please?
By the Numbers
8 – Giants have not trailed for the last eight quarters.
181.8 – Average passing yards per game for Colin Kaepernick, worst in the league.
181.8 – Tom Coughlin’s resting blood pressure.
Take one sip of beer if…
The Giants get into the redzone and end up settling for a field goal.
Cris Collinsworth refers to any player as “Just an impressive young man”.
Fog starts to come out of Cris Collinsworth’s mouth.
You see any shameless NBC plug.
Al Michaels says “YUUUUUUUUUUUUGE” in any context.
Take one shot of liquor if…
Coughlin is chewing gum, cocks his sideways, and puts his hands on his hips.
Bob Costas pisses you off.
Totally Legitimate Game Prediction
49ers – 0 (Do they even know how?)
Giants – 0 (They know how, they just don’t want to.)