As we march towards Week 14 and the start of the fantasy playoffs, this week will be a crucial one for many owners. With 6 NFL teams on bye, there are a bunch of stars that we need to find replacements for. We’ll be giving some extra attention to some players that wouldn’t normally ever sniff our starting lineups.

Let’s get to the rest of this week’s matchups, and talk about some players we should start, and those we should keep on our bench.

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After the NFL Scouting Combine this past year, much was made of D.K. Metcalf’s rippling muscles. My boss was talking up the Ole Miss product’s biceps. My girlfriend was enamored with his bustling chest. Even Momma-Donk called to ask about D.K.’s glutes. But what nobody talked about were his bulging calves. That is until week 9, when the Buccaneers defense was hypnotized by Metcalf’s leg beef.

The entire Seahawks offense took full advantage of this calf-muscle-induced hypnosis with Russell Wilson going 29/43 for 378 yards and 5 touchdowns—he now has 22 passing touchdowns on the season—Tyler Lockett snagged 13 catches for 152 yards and 2 touchdowns—he now has 6 touchdowns on the season—and the sexy calved beast himself, D.K. Metcalf, hauled in 6 catches for 153 yards and his 5th touchdown. The Buccaneer defense will attempt to snap out of the trance before gazing into Kyler Murray’s sparkling eyes next week. Anyway, here’s what else I saw during yesterday’s late games in fantasy football:

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It’s a well known fact: Ezekiel Elliott has an insatiable appetite. The star running back has been begging anyone and everyone to feed him since all the way back to Pop Warner, but the hunger has never subsided. This past September the Cowboys finally broke down and gave Zeke a little grocery money of his own. But the Dallas RB hasn’t been able to locate the Whole Foods Market in his neighborhood and continues to ask for handouts. Fortunately, his best bud Dak Prescott (21/27 for 239 yards, 5 carries for 30 yards and 2 touchdowns) continues to be charitable, feeding Zeke the pigskin 22 times for 111 yards plus another 6 thru the air for 36 more yards and his 6th touchdown as the Cowboys trounced the Eagles on Sunday night. Watch those fingers Dak! Anyway, here’s what else I saw during yesterday’s late games in fantasy football: 

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B_Don escapes from Vegas rehab to bring you a fantasy football profile show with Donkey Teeth. This week the guys take a look at Geronimo Allison and Marquez Valdes-Scantling in the wake of Davante Adams turf toe issues.

Tune in to find out whether either or both of these young ball grabbers are startable while Adams is out and beyond. And then everyone’s favorite segment from last year, assh*le of the week, makes its triumphant return.

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It’s no secret, Donkey likes em young. There’s just something about the trusting innocence in those big soft rookie eyes which can’t be matched by an old weathered veteran. And fantasy sports are all about having fun; what’s more fun than drafting the youngster your buddies have never heard of and watching the kid grow into a superstar on your fantasy team as your closest friend cries their self to sleep while clutching the last place penis trophy?

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Continuing another similar piece to what I’ve been writing about this past week or so, today we’ll be taking a look at Explosive Play Rankings from Sharp Football Stats. Over the past week or so, I’ve been talking a lot about finding fantasy value and bargain players that come from the most successful offenses, or offenses that prioritize the pass or run compared to other teams. Well, today, we’ll be diving into Explosive Play Rankings, and finding out which offenses have explosive run games, and which offenses are explosive through the air. In turn, this should further help us on draft day by targeting lucrative offenses that will produce some of the best fantasy players. 

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B_Don and Donk Teeth are back talking football and sausage on the Ditka Pod this week. Digging in on the 2019 rookie wide receiver class, the sausage stuffers profile each of the wide outs taken in the first two rounds of this year’s NFL draft. It’s a deep class with lots of speed and deep threats.

Marquise “Hollywood” Brown was the first WR off the board this year, mainly because he’s Antonio Brown’s cousin…and he’s good at football too. N’Keal Harry was the only other receiver taken in the first round of the NFL draft, but the second round saw a whopping seven receivers go off the board: Deebo Samuel, A.J. Brown, Mecole Hardman, JJ Arcega-Whiteside, Parris Campbell, Andy Isabella, and D.K. Metcalf. Find out which of these studs to target in your dynasty rookie drafts, who has the most redraft potential, and who to invite over to your house for stimulating conversation over a juicy bratwurst.
 
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