I hate to talk ill of you on the last read of the season, I really do. I only dole out tough love when tough love is due but I think this situation is ripe for it. You shouldn’t really care about what I’m typing right now. Ok, ok, ok, I’m alright if you care because your championship is two weeks long. Not perfect but it is reasonable. But really, even in a week 17 in which games actually mattered, the fantasy football season should not be judged by the scoring leader board we got this week. Sure, LeGarrette Blount has slowly worked is way into the cockles of Belichick’s heart over the course of the season. Really let’s face facts, though; Bill’s been looking for a BenJarvus Green-Ellis impersonator since day one. Congrats, Billy boy, looks like you found your man. Blount finished with 189 rushing yards and 2 TDs on the day and 334 all purpose yards to set a Patriots franchise record and the 11th most in NFL history. That’s a pretty wild day and great if you had it on your team…but really? Did you come into 2013 saying ‘I can’t wait to sit Jamaal Charles and start Blount’? Even in a week where there were so many important games on Sunday, it was still an odd fantasy day overall as we’ll cover a bit…and by that I mean drill bit. I’m gonna drive this point home people! But for serious, I’m happy for you and Ima let you finish but week 16 championships are the great of all time…OF ALL TIME! Ok, I’m done lambasting you…for now. Here’s what else I saw from the final week of the season for 2013 Fantasy Football…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I found it fitting to quote the Doors classic “The End” to signal the finale to our FFB season. If your championship is next week then I feel sorry for you because your commish is really bad at his/her job and deserves all the condemnation that is coming to them. Now back to this whole “The End” thing, this is it for me, next week is my awards show, which reminds me that I need to grab my tuxedo T-Shirt from the dry cleaners, and all we have are the real life playoffs. *makes hip thrusting motions at monitor* My Broncos are in, what about your teams? Now is the time to show all your “skills” and hopefully the people you choose will play all four quarters, get their projections +, and they don’t suffer some game ending injury that makes you look terrible at fantasy because when your guys get hurt it’s all your fault. How stupid must we be to play a guy that gets hurt, didn’t you get the crystal ball that came in the box of Captain Crunch. We need to keep a few things in perspective, play smart but not over think ourselves, look at the floor vs. the ceiling if it’s close and keep a box of tissues with us at all times on Sunday. The best thing about this week is we have no TNF, which IMO, is the worst thing the NFL has done since allowing this jackass back in the league. Oh wait, that’s right, they have no integrity…or soul, they can play god with fines for questionable hits and suspend people for smoking some weed but this a**hole gets to play every week? WTF is wrong with this picture?….besides that dudes hair. Hey look it’s a fantasy paragraph below, let’s check it out. Actually two paragraphs down are fantasy sports, the next one is fantasy becoming reality, go ahead Kid A, insert your snark now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Razzball Nation!  I’m filling in for Sky this morning in the football recap, as Sky was called by Al Davis for a possible CB job opening.  That would be scary for multiple reasons!  Man Oakland was brutal.  Long live the Chiefs offense!  Jamaal Charles had a historic game (6th highest fantasy output in non-PPR since 1960), making the Raiders D look worse than some of those Raiders costumes.  The real Rocky Horror Picture Show was the pass D, as JC Superstar enlightened fantasy owners with 8 catches (on 8 targets) for 195 yards and 4 TDs.  Plus an extra 20 on the ground with a score there.  Straight video game numbers!  “RB screen, X, X, X!”  Actually that sounds like a porn title.  I’ll have to ask Tehol about that one.  Charles has been effing fantastic this year, and I think easily the fantasy MVP.  Sure you could argue Peyton Manning, but if you have JC and you’re somehow not waltzing through the playoffs than you only have yourself to blame!  Is he fantasy’s #1 pick next year?  I don’t see how you could resist.  If someone really wanted Adrian Peterson, I’d turn to them after that pick ala the 1,000-year old dude in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade and go “he chose poorly…”  While some teams had their dreams melt away, others are marching into the finals with the rest of the week 15 happenings…

Please, blog, may I have some more?