Two weeks ago I amused the people with my top 25 for 2020 dynasty football where I wrote about my crooked hard-on for Kerryon Johnson from my cushy American barn. Last week I captivated the audience with my top 50 for 2020 dynasty football where I insulted JuJu Smith-Schuster while vacationing in Madrid. This week I’ll regale the world with my top 75 for 2020 dynasty football, written while stranded in Paris on Jesus’s Birthday. Long story short: the Europeans are on strike. Nobody wants to work, making my holiday travels a challenge. But there’s worse places to get stuck than Paris where Donkey has made the most of it by visiting world renowned Peyronie’s Disease specialists, eating hay crêpes and discovering new football talent; I’ve heard this Cristiano Ronaldo hombre will be a great kicker. Anyway, here’s my top 75 for 2020 dynasty football:
Please, blog, may I have some more?Jarvis Landry
With only one win until the holy grail, the fantasy championships, we need to focus on the task ahead: Play for next Sunday. There are a bunch of great matchups on the board this week, so let’s talk about some players we need to lock in our lineups, and those that need to stay on the bench.
Let’s get into this week’s Starts and Sits.
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Garrett Plays Whack-A-Mole With Rudolph’s Head
November 15, 2019 | Fantasy Football Daily Notes | 16 Commentsby: MB
It was an ugly end to an ugly game. The talk of the town this morning is how long Myles Garrett should be suspended by the NFL. Baker even brought up a suspension in the post game interview. Striking Mason Rudolph with his own helmet is one of the most malicious acts that we’ve seen on the field in a very long time. If there is even a little bit of humor in what occurred; trust me there isn’t much, it was Mason Rudolph throwing his hands up to the ref IMMEDIATELY after the helmet hits him.
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Handcuff Report: Bad Boyz Of Week 11
November 11, 2019 | Handcuff Report | 18 Commentsby: Nic Romero
Brian Hill found himself under surveillance on week 4’s handcuff report and now finds himself atop the offender list for week 11. On Saturday, the Atlanta Falcons placed backup RB Ito Smith on injured reserve. Hill found himself thrusted into the #2 spot on the depth chart heading into Sundays matchup against the Saints, but finished the game as the #1 lead dawg in ATL following Devonta Freemans 3rd quarter exit. Hill finished the game with 40 offensive snaps, with Kenjon Barner recording the only other RB snaps (11) outside of Freeman. Freeman’s foot injury will need to be monitored throughout the week. The Falcons offense showed life returning from their bye and getting QB Matt Ryan back from injury, beating the NFC South leading New Orlean Saints 26 – 9. Fantasy owners, desperate for RB depth, need to place a waiver claim for Brian Hill this week. Qadree Ollison will assume #2 duties if Freeman were to miss an extended period of time.
Please, blog, may I have some more? Henry The Hammer Nails The Chiefs
November 11, 2019 | Fantasy Football Daily Notes | 18 Commentsby: MB
Patrick Mahomes made his triumphant return to the Chiefs’ lineup on Sunday and he did not disappoint. On his first throw he didn’t look like he was moving around very well and threw what looked like an interception, but it ended up getting overturned to a completion. After that, he looked like the same ol’ Patty. Andy Reid was not at all shy about his usage either. Mahomes attempted 50 passes and completed 36 of them for 446 yards and 3 touchdowns.
It really helps to have Tyreek Hill and Travis Kelce to throw to. Tyreek Hill saw a remarkable 19 targets and caught 11 of them for 157 yards and a touchdown. Travis Kelce caught all 7 of his targets for 75 yards. Mecole Hardman absolutely turned on the burners for his 63 yard touchdown catch. Having two of the fastest wide receivers in the league is paying off for the Chief’s offense. Unfortunately, we have the Chief’s defense, and we also have the turnover prone running backs on this roster. While Damien Williams did reach over 100 total yards, he had a costly fumble that might have put him in the doghouse with Andy Reid. I’m not quite sure what his other options are though.
Please, blog, may I have some more?After the NFL Scouting Combine this past year, much was made of D.K. Metcalf’s rippling muscles. My boss was talking up the Ole Miss product’s biceps. My girlfriend was enamored with his bustling chest. Even Momma-Donk called to ask about D.K.’s glutes. But what nobody talked about were his bulging calves. That is until week 9, when the Buccaneers defense was hypnotized by Metcalf’s leg beef.
The entire Seahawks offense took full advantage of this calf-muscle-induced hypnosis with Russell Wilson going 29/43 for 378 yards and 5 touchdowns—he now has 22 passing touchdowns on the season—Tyler Lockett snagged 13 catches for 152 yards and 2 touchdowns—he now has 6 touchdowns on the season—and the sexy calved beast himself, D.K. Metcalf, hauled in 6 catches for 153 yards and his 5th touchdown. The Buccaneer defense will attempt to snap out of the trance before gazing into Kyler Murray’s sparkling eyes next week. Anyway, here’s what else I saw during yesterday’s late games in fantasy football:
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Stat-o-Matic: WR Slot Fantasy Points Per Target
November 1, 2019 | Fantasy Football Strategy | 1 Commentby: al_FF_red
This will be the second installment of Stat-o-Matic where we will look at some advanced stats around the NFL. As a disclaimer, I am using this space to play around with some numbers and present some interesting findings. But, by no means is this validated or predictive data. I hope that it will lead to meaningful discoveries or it could inspire you to go down your own rabbit hole. We’re going to explore together, crunch some numbers and see what pops out.
Please, blog, may I have some more? Baker Swings His Chubb Around Baltimore
September 30, 2019 | Fantasy Football Daily Notes | 27 Commentsby: MB
Here at Razzball, we can’t get enough of the Chubb puns. Whether it’s Donkey Teeth, Zach, or myself, we’re going to force our d*ck jokes into you. WOAH! WOAH! WOAH! Personal foul and possible ejection on MB. We’re going to have to bring in Mike Pereira for that one. After further review, I will be allowed to review the early games for you. Later today, you can find Donkey Teeth’s round up of the late afternoon games and the Sunday night tilt.
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The Case For Baker Mayfield As The QB2
July 23, 2019 | Fantasy Football Strategy | 2 Commentsby: Zach
If you ask 100 fantasy analysts who they have as their #1 QB in fantasy, I’m sure 100/100 would tell you that it’s Patrick Mahomes. However, if you then ask them who their #2 QB in fantasy is, and you’ll get a variety of answers. Some will tell you it’ll be Andrew Luck. Some have Deshaun Watson. Some are going back to the Aaron Rodgers well. However, I’m here to tell you that we should be strongly considering Baker Mayfield as the QB2 in fantasy football this season.
Please, blog, may I have some more? Top 60 WR PPR Rankings: 16-30
July 23, 2019 | Fantasy Football Rankings, Fantasy Football Strategy |by: MB
As we continue through the draft rankings journey, there are a lot of names on this list that could end up being league winners for you. Any of the three Rams receivers could have an exceptional season and anyone on this list could end up with 1,200-1,300 yards and a bunch of touchdowns. The fun part is picking the right players in the draft. So let’s roll the dice and see if we can come up with some answers for your WR2-WR3 spots.
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