There were lots of cringe-worthy injuries in the NFL this week, and many that will have a lasting impact in fantasy football leagues. I could sit here and draw out the lede with some funny remarks that are linked to even funnier videos, but let’s face it, injuries aren’t very funny, and with so many guys to cover, let’s just get right into it!

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Welcome to the Handcuff Report, 2014 primer. The Almighty J-FOH has bestowed upon me the honor of keeping you knuckleheads up to date on the latest NFL arrests, felonies, and misdemeanors. If Steven Ridley and Shane Vereen are smoking weed in a Pontiac Firebird, we’ll be there. If  Titus Young finds his way back into the league, we’ll be there. If Golden Tate decides to steal maple bars from a Detroit bakery, we’ll be there. You get the point…. Wait.?!?! That’s not what this post covers?…. It’s about running back committee’s? …Hmmm I don’t think that’s right. Jay, I think we have a problem…..I had 1,300 words about Ray Rice, Josh Gordon, Le’veon Bell, and LeGarrette Blount. It seemed reasonable, there are a lot of arrests, and they do in fact impact our rosters. But okay… I got it now, you meant handcuff in a less literal sense. Oops! Welp, time to refocus. I guess instead I’ll be discussing the ever evolving Running Back committee situations around the league. For today and at least the first few weeks of the season, I’ll be providing a list of depth charts and commenting on the situations I feel need to be covered. In other words I’ll be spending less time on teams like the Vikings, Bears, or Seahawks and more time on teams like the Lions, Falcons, and Dolphins. As the season progresses, I’ll probably switch to more of a “handcuffs to watch format”, where I’ll cover a handful of backs with expanding roles. But who knows, we’ll see, you guys can tell me in the comments if you like the depth chart rankings. I’m cool with that. After today I will be sticking with the tried and true tiered approach (say that three times fast Micro Machine Man) and the tier names that J-FOH had last year, because what else is there outside of Fuzzy, Standard Issue Police, and Duct taped handcuffs? That pretty much covers the handcuff gamut. No??? Are there other varieties besides the ones covered?  Like those weird plastic ones, that cops use, maybe? Did you notice I said “cops use”… do you know why? Because Standard Issue Police That’s Why!!!

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It feels weird making Montell Owens a suggestion. I mean, he’s been the starter for Jacksonville for the last couple of weeks, there are no signs we see Maurice Jones-Drew at any point for the rest of the season and Rashad Jennings has done nothing to prove he deserves more than a bit role when he fully recovers from his concussion. However, facts are facts. Montell is still owned in only 27% of yahoo leagues and only 11% over at ESPN and I’ve never seen a starting RB I didn’t like. Well, there’s Michael Turner but that’s for an entirely different post. What I see is a flex play in a playoff week where anything goes. The studs that got you to week 16 could be sitting in week 17. I remember the one year I played the championship in week 17 because I accidentally didn’t set it correctly for week 16 before the season started. I won because I picked up the 43 yards, 4 receptions and the touchdown Jerheme Urban brought to the table that week. Don’t know who that is? Good, you shouldn’t. Welcome to what David Bowie no doubt was singing about. Week 17 is all about the guys who don’t start typically but are going to get the snaps to prove they should at least make the team’s practice squad the next year. So with that, let’s take a look at just a few more week 17 heroes for 2012 fantasy football…

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With the first week of playoffs in the books for most leagues, it’s rare that contending teams need a ton of help on the Waiver Wire. Your roster is set, and you don’t want to complicate things by creating unnecessary decisions. After all, there’s nothing worse than losing a close playoff matchup by making the […]

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The first couple of games we saw Nick Foles, he truly did play like  a rookie.  The game seemed too fast for him.  He was throwing passes way too late and had to deal with the same struggles Vick dealt with concerning a porous offensive line.  It really wasn’t the best set up for Nick […]

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There are literally thousands of sources of rankings, sleepers, busts, breakouts, and burnouts on the internet. The vast majority of them will be focusing on 10-team leagues with the “standard” roster setup of the site in question. But who are they to say what’s standard in the fully customizable world of fantasy football? If you’re […]

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