Completed Previews: AFC North – NFC North – NFC East Part I – NFC East Part II – AFC East Part I – AFC East Part II – NFC South Part I – NFC South Part II – AFC South Part I

2019 projections referenced below are based on razzball.com 2019 projections managed and updated by our very own @RudyGamble . ADP, and strength of schedule referenced are based on fantasypros.com consensus data.

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Welcome back, my Lovelies, to another e-rousing week of Hit it or Quit it, with Yours Truly, your Goddess of innuendo. Week 9 seemed to be a ho-hum week for me as your stunningly gorgeous Goddess went a mediocre 3-2. As expected, my sacrificial league was a complete and utter sh**show, but was somewhat less grotesque following a blowout in one of my money leagues. The emasculation I visited on that poor bastard is one for the ages. I may have to report to the Hague now because it really was a crime against humanity. These constant losses in my sacrificial league still do not sit well with me. Although I do not like the role of submissive, in the end life is about balance. As you know, I am willing to take one raw and dry from you, my faithful readers, with the hopes I can bring you first-hand experience on how my article subjects fare, so if that means I have to assume unfamiliar roles to keep you coming back for more each week, I am willing to do so without charging extra.

The curse managed to spare me again this week, so I am beginning to think there is something to this sacrificial league after all. I will probably jinx myself, but I have never made it this long in any season without being absolutely violated by the Curse. Of course, Fournette is still taking up oxygen while sipping Mai Tai’s on my bench, but rumor has it he plans to head back following the bye. I’ll believe that when I see it. Right now, he is more like a freeloading ex who just will not go away, but you cannot bring yourself to quit him because when he is on, he satisfies many a need for you. C’est la vie.

Wow, Week 10 already. Where has the time gone? I so enjoy our time together in the Dungeon each week and knowing we only have a few more weeks of fun together before the season ends, well, that just brings an iota of pain to my cold, dead heart. Yes, even I, your Mistress of Pain, your Dominatrix of Destruction misses you. After all, without you, I would not be able to keep the lights on in the Dungeon, and the routine bleach downs really take a hit on the wallet. Therefore, I suppose I should get to why you are here this week. I know, talk is cheap, but I am not. Without further ado, I give you Week 10, Hit it or Quit it.

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What’s going on everyone, and welcome to another fantastic fall Saturday as we draw closer to another Sunday full of NFL football! Week 4 got off to a great start on Thursday night thanks to the high-powered offenses of the Rams and Vikings, and we should be in for some more exciting football tomorrow.

Let’s get to it!

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Loyal readers of mine know that usually I have either some sort of nonsensical or comically long introductory paragraph, sometimes relevant (discussing a DFS concept/tactic/strategy that I think would be helpful for you to digest), often times entirely not relevant. However, in this case, I think the right course of action is to get right to the picks, because frankly, there’s a bunch of good cheap choices at RB this week. That’s because a few injuries to starting RBs after salaries were published caused some insanely good values to open up at the low end, and when combined with the same pair of elite RBs from last week in juicy matchups once again, we’re looking at some tough decision making. So let’s get right to it.

On to the picks…

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Remember a few weeks ago when I recounted my tale of  trading Dak Prescott because I had Deshaun Watson only to lose Deshaun Watson for the season? The QB I added was Tyrod Taylor. The Bills have one of the softest fantasy playoff schedules (Week 13: Patriots, Week 14: Colts, Week 15: Dolphins, Week 16: Patriots.) I like Nathan Peterman as a deep option and you’ll find him in my waiver column on Tuesday. And there will definitely be plenty of J. Peterman references. Teasers!

As always, if you’ve got league-specific questions, I’ve got league-specific answers down below…

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I’ll warn you right now — there aren’t a lot of great QB fill in options this week. Lots of tough match-ups or under performing players. I had to recommend what remains of Teddy Bridgewater for Pete Carroll’s sake! You won’t see him listed in this article, but my prediction from last week of Colin Kaepernick getting a job still remains! Even if he’s now suing the exact people who could possibly offer him a job…

This week will see the Detroit Lions and Houston Texans getting the week off. You’ll need help replacing Matthew Stafford, Deshaun Watson, Lamar Miller, DeAndre Hopkins, Golden Tate and Ameer Abdullah.

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Now that my little Fantasy Football science experiment is over I’m going to change things up a little bit. You wouldn’t believe all the hate mail I got in the past couple of weeks. It seems my ESPN accounts have been locked out and someone even toilet papered my front yard. Enough is enough. Going forward I’m just going to give you my top six picks for the week. The only rule for a pick is that a player cannot be considered a stud to be eligible. Recommending Antonio Brown helps no one.

Before we get started let’s quickly see how I did last week…

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I believe that karma rules fantasy football. I don’t think there’s any other governing force. Example: in my home league I won last week by .42 points and this week, you freaking know it, I lost by .3. Next week am I going to win by .2? I can’t take the aggravation. Though a win’s a win and all we really need is a playoff spot, right? We all want a bye, but 1-4 isn’t season over. I won that league last year by slipping in as the sixth seed (though I had the most overall points which is why I had the creative team name “Most Points”).

Sad truth is if you are 1-4, you can’t be 1-5; so look at the teams in your league and throw out trade offers for guys going this week (I’m not just telling you, I’m doing it too; got unlucky and staring down 1-5 in a big money league). But we believe in fantasy football karma in the land of AbFAAB and the only way to up that is to spend some money! ($100 Free Agent Auction Budget Dollars we’re playing with; at least that’s what we started the season with.)

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