Ugh, why am I even doing this?  I don’t know but I started something and I’m gonna end it right and the way it should end with me reviewing all of our 2012 fantasy football rankings and I’m not gonna let the boring topic of kickers impede that goal.  There were quite a few surprises this year in the end of year kicker ranks.  Of course, that last sentence requires that you care about kicker ranks and how things ended up.  Some fan/fantasy favorites like SeaBass didn’t quite make it while a couple of young upstarts climbed their way into fantasy relevance.  Or at least as relevant as you can get for being a kicker.  To clear any confusion, we’re relying on yahoo’s end of season rankings for kickers in terms of review as we don’t yet have our own player rater but – spoilers! – are in the hopes we have one for the 2013 season.  I know you just can’t wait to see how kickers line up in that!  Alright, wordpress has informed me I’ve now cleared over 150 words about a position less cared about than the missionary so let’s move on.  Here were your top 10 kickers for the 2012 fantasy football season…

Kickers stats are based on Field Goals Made and Extra Points Made.  Stats that you care are based on a scale of ‘hell’ and goes all the way to ‘no’.

1. Blair Walsh – Walsh is exactly what you want from your kicker but can never tell who that kicker is going to be.  It’s the kicker on the team with a decent to good defense whose offense has the ability to drive the ball but doesn’t finish their drives well enough to score touchdowns so you get plenty of shots to kick field goals.  The fact he played in a dome for half of his games was just gravy on the chocolate cake.  What, you’ve never had that?  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers: 35/36

2. Stephen Gostowski – You bought top shelf, you got top shelf.  And by ‘bought top shelf’ I mean he was one of the first kickers taken from your draft pool…which means he was a second to last pick rather than a last pick for someone out there.  Preseason Rank #2, 2012 Projections: 30/55, Final Numbers: 29/66

3. Matt Bryant – Gotta love dome kickers.  AmIrightoramIright?  You tell me what to say here, we’re still talking about kickers.  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers: 33/44

4. Lawrence Tynes – At one point this season, Tynes was the #1 kicker in fantasy.  I only know this because someone commented I had Tynes too low in my weekly rankings for some odd week.  So I readjusted and it was the first of many weeks in a stretch that he began to suck.  Wanna know what else sucks?  Ranking kickers.  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers: 33/46

5. Jason Hanson – This only Hanson to go on and have a successful career after ‘Mmmm Bop!’, Jason is probably the only person old enough to get that reference.  Seriously, I remember watching him kick for the Washington State Cougars in the 90’s.  Which points to me being the second person old enough to get that reference and I’m aging at an even more rapid pace writing about kickers.  Let’s get on with it.  Preseason Rank #8, 2012 Projections: 20/50, Final Numbers: 32/38

6. Shayne Graham – If Matt Schaub stays the starting QB for the Texans next year, I think Graham will sneak even higher onto this list.  That’s all the 2013 looking forward content you’re going to get out of this point.  What you want a sleeper post or something?  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers: 31/45

7. Justin Tucker – Yet another newcomer not just to the league but to the top 10, Tucker impressed everyone by not being Billy Cundiff.  Congrats on that, Justin!  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers: 30/42

8. Conor Barth – The Buccs offense improved immensely from 2011 to 2012 so obviously Conor would go from 19th best kicker to 8th best.  Yes, I actually researched that.  Kill me now.  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers: 28/39

9. Matt Prater – Prater your deity of choice that I don’t do a top 20 kickers for next year.  That sounds like the end of a ‘knock, knock’ joke that wasn’t very good.  Ooooh, that would be an awesome Jeopardy question/answer thing, wouldn’t?  Like the question would be the first sentence and you’d have to guess what person was being talked about and you’d have to answer ‘Who is Matt Prater?’…look, if you’ve got better material about these guys I’m all ears.  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers: 26/55

10. David Akers – This man finished Akers from where you drafted him.  ‘Who is David Akers?’.  Correct!  Oops sorry about that, the Jeopardy idea leaked onto David’s blurb.  Akers final spot is exactly why I don’t worry too much about kicker rankings in a given week/year as almost half the guys ahead of him probably went undrafted in your leagues.  Preseason Rank #6, 2012 Projections: 35/35, Final Numbers: 29/44

  1. Chase says:

    My sources tell me the Texans will let Graham go to Free Agency, and Bullock is the kicker for the future.

    • Sky

      Sky says:

      Cool, sounds possible. This is just a review of how 2012 ended, not future rankings. We’ll see how it all ends up.

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