What’s up Turkey Day fans? Hopefully you’re enjoying a ridiculous amount of food and libations in a safe place with people you enjoy today. It’s holiday fantasy football and I’ve been around the community long enough to know it’s just us degenerates sitting at the table playing 500. Did you keep score? Nah, me neither. Pour another libation and turn the TV on loud, it’s going to be a long day. Let’s see if we can’t save our fantasy football teams while we’re at it.
Kirk Cousins: Wow, it’s an awful week for QB matchups. You want to go Taylor Heinicke? Be my freaking guest. Cousins is available in about 40% of leagues, which is good enough to stream if you’re stuck on BYE or don’t want to risk the Russell Wilson train. The Vikings are in “Save Face” mode after Mike Zimmer drove the team to a .500 last week and are facing the mental health saga of defensive lineman Everson Griffin…on top of the Dalvin Cook domestic abuse drama. As a Vikings fan, I’m basically one foot out the door already. Cousins and Jefferson have a magic connection and we can roll the dice that they’ve got another trick up their sleeve this week.
Mark Ingram: The good thing about quarterbacks is that QBs 5-20 all score about the same. If I don’t like Heinicke, I recommend Cousins. But running backs? Yeeesh. After the top 5 it gets really sketchy. Ingram has been a top 15 RB 2 weeks straight in relief of Alvin Kamara, and at his current availability and ceiling, you’ll be hard pressed to find anybody better who might help you at this point in the season. Also…Mark Ingram was a bit banged up in practice, so make sure you check his status because he goes on Thursday. If he sits…I mean, you’re literally tossing dice at Tony Jones at that point. Cross your fingers that he suits up on Thursday.
Darnell Mooney: The Bears/Lions game is going to be probably the worst game of the year. Backup QBs and a Bears team that was supposed to fire coach Matt Nagy after the game but then rescinded that statement. OK, they’ll fire Nagy on Friday. Whatever. Andy Dalton is still playing for a future QB role somewhere and Darnell Mooney is the hot hand that will make him look good while Fields is out. Mooney’s available in 40% of leagues and has 100+ yard upside.
Elijah Moore: Somehow this guy’s still available in 50% of leagues despite putting up WR1 numbers the past few weeks. Of course, Zach Wilson is back under center for the Jets, but…Josh Johnson is in at backup again? Roll the dice that Johnson does another 300+ yard showing in relief of Zach Wilson.
Thanksgiving Day Football
Bears/Lions: This game could literally end in a 0-0 tie. More likely, Andy Dalton and the Bears trounce the Lions while D’Andre Swift racks up 150 yards as the only offensive piece that the Lions have. This game is fun for DFS, but for all the other fantasy football fans, you’re free to bypass this one.
Raiders/Cowboys: A classic cops and robbers game, except you can’t tell which team is playing which role. Dak Prescott should be good to go and you start all your studs from every game in this slate. Also, this will probably be the only watchable Thanksgiving game, so get the crew over for that afternoon gem and have a sarsaparilla and a grog for me.
Bills/Saints: Is Trevor Siemian “Must See TV”? Will we see Taysom Hill get some time under center? What if Mark Ingram sits? It’s entirely possible that the Saints run out their QB3/RB3/WR2 (that’s Tre’Quan Smith, bee-tee-dubya) because nobody else is healthy on the team. Start all the Bills of course. But otherwise, take this lame game as an excuse to do some Black Friday shopping.
Happy holidays everybody and drop any questions you have down in the comment section!