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Greetings! What. Just. Happened? Six months ago, I would have literally bet my life against five grand that Donald Trump had zero shot at being the Republican nominee. Two months ago, I would have bet every red cent I have that he could not defeat Hillary Clinton in this epic battle for USA supremacy. It became quite apparent to me how insanely wrong I was about the whole sitch, right about when Trump did Killary like Frank Dukes did Chong Li in Bloodsport. One can only receive so many consecutive roundhouse kicks to the grill piece before they fall to the mat in a bloody and bruised pile of raw hamburger meat and shart-stained drawls. This is honestly the hugest upset in the history of politics, or maybe the biggest upset of any kind. I’m talking about in the history of the world. I am beyond shocked. A few months ago, I would have said I’m appalled, but Hillary is so insanely unlikable that the fact she could have been the first woman to preside over the United States of America wasn’t even an interesting story. Her campaign became desperate, as she posted edited attack ads going at Trump, making her look petty and weak. Not only did Trump win, but the Republicans managed to still maintain control of both the house and the senate! PLEASE RID THIS NATION OF THE DEATH TAX! This money has already been taxed. What right does the government have to it? Again, this money has already been taxed. I don’t even understand how this is a real thing. But, truly, this Trump shizz is beyond nuts, but kudos to him for staying the course and pulling it out. Imagine how incredible it would feel to win the Presidency after countless celebrities and people like Warren Buffett and Mark Cuban blasted him non-stop. I must say, that that’s quite impressive. You simply cannot deny this. Yes, my goodmen, Donald J. Trump got the last laugh here…

I am Tehol Beddict, and this is Disgrace and Delight! Take heed!

 

 

Players the Lord believes will Ball Out in Week 10:

Tom Brady – I’m assuming you all witnessed what Tygod did to this pathetic defense? I’m also assuming you all know by now that Tygod is superior to almost every quarterback in the NFL and that I’m still awaiting my Purple Heart and Nobel prize for discovering him and predicting greatness for him before anyone else in the world. This blurb isn’t about Tyrod? Oops, I did it again. I played with your heart. I made you believe, that we were more than just friends. Seriously though, Brady is about to carve up the Seahawks like the bed sheet his ex-wife, Ivana Trump, made him for his first KKK rally. I’m jooooooooking. But shoot, If Tyrod Taylor can obliterate this once proud defense IN SEATTLE, WITH NO RECEIVERS, then, what, my goodmen, is Brady going to do to them in front of Bob Kraft and his 23-year girlfriend who he took in the day after his wife kicked the bucket? I’m thinking 400 yards and a minimum of three touchdowns.

Jay Cutler – After watching Bucs defenders grabbing their ankles and getting pounded in a game of butt’s up, I’ve decided to now rank them as the worst defense in the NFL, surpassing a pathetic Saints group. Smokin’ Jay astonished us with his brilliance and precision two weeks ago in dismantling the Minnesota Vikings (who have since fallen off like a bad bag of dope by the way). Cutler should be owned on at least one of your DFS teams this week as he attempts to make Chicago great again…

Peyton Barber – The Bucs running back group has taken more licks than Bill Clinton did from Monica Lewinsky, yet somehow these guys continue to produce. Barber is the only man standing at the moment so I’d say there’s a high probability of a 80 plus total yards and a score. Another year in the gutter for Tampa. Trump very well could change that… How, I’m not sure.

Jay Ajayi – Not since the great Donald Trump won the presidency have I witnessed a more stunning rise to the top. The Boise State product continues to amaze on a weekly basis and now I cant keep my D out of the peanut butter jar. It’s shocking, really. One could argue Ajayi is the number one RB for the remainder of the season.

Alshon Jefferey – I’ve already mentioned the Bucs defense being shredded like Hillary attempted to do with her emails before she realized they were stored online in a thing called a computer, and Jefferey has Cutler back and has now had a bye to get fully healthy. I would expect a nuclear……….explosion.

Tyler Lockett – He gets a TD off a bomb this week. Believe me.

Jimmy Graham – Still waiting on all the phone calls from all my fantasy expert brethren, conceding to me for being the only one man enough to predict Graham’s epic comeback. There is no better receiving tight end in the NFL, possibly the history of the NFL. The Patriots defense is more pathetic than Ralph Lifshitz attempting to block me from porkin’ his wife every three months or so, so I’m fully expecting Jimmy to take advantage.

 

Players the Lord believes will Fail like the Entire Democratic Party in Week 10:

Blake Bortles – You would be hard pressed to find a man I respect less than Blake Bortles right now. He is the Mitt Romney of NFL quarterbacks, as he started with a spark but now he’s just garbage. This weenie actually makes Paul Ryan look like a man and frankly, I’m at my wits end. I truly do not understand what happened to this young man. Every coach on the Jaguars staff must be fired immediately. This team has playoff level talent and are an absolute laughing stock. Send these lames to London where they belong.

Case Keenum – Hello, it’s me. I was wondering if after all these months you’d like to play me. To go over everything. They say time’s supposed to heal my inadequacies, but I ain’t done much healing. Jared Goff.

T.J. Yeldon – Another pathetic Jag. Ivory went off last week, further solidifying Yeldon’s place as chosen whizzinator holder for his more talented teammates. “Sorry Teej, didn’t mean to spray you in the eye again. This clean urine is for Allen Robinson, though, I’m thinking we should get him to quit blazing because he’s been absolute gutter butt in 2016.”

Rashad Jennings – Is there any man less deserving of an NFL job than this guy? Seriously, Hillary Clinton has bigger nuts than this guy. This will be his last season in the NFL, and rightfully so. You’ve got to be realistic about these things.

Julian Edelman – I’m not even trying to hate, I’m just wondering where the stats have been for little Julian. I could be wrong here, because, honestly, I didn’t even look them up. I’m just saying that it seems he’s had a bit of  a down year with some of the added weapons the Patriots brought in this past offseason. We all remember Jeremy Lane shutting his ass down before the breaking his leg, which helped allow the Patriots to steal the worst Super Bowl in NFL history. Never forget.

DeSean Jackson – Remember when this man was considered one of the most dynamic and explosive threats in the National Football league? Those memories seem to now forever be lost along with thoughts of climate change and universal health care.

Coby Fleener – Cannot believe that Fleener totally ruined Clinton’s campaign after the FBI looked into email’s between himself and Hillary regarding his sexting addiction. Did Hillary even ask for those photos? I mean, we all love a good Dik pic, but come on.

 

 

Thank you for joining me for another edition of Disgrace/Delight. As per usual, your comments and questions will be responded to below. If you’re out there rioting, I selfishly hope you make it home safely to increase the amount of clicks I receive on this post. Let’s make Razzball great again, my goodmen. Let’s chat later.

  1. MJP says:
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    Ware is Ware if he suits up?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @MJP: oh he’s a beast. He’s a a dog. West was disappointing . Maybe take a tad easy on him this week but def still startable

  2. Scott says:
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    I’m a little gun shy about Terrence after last week’s limp performance. You really think he’s RB13 this week?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Scott: I will. Still be updating throughout the week. I feel you but Dixon has showed me nothing and BRUH, it’s Cleveland . Obviously if he fails this week it’s gonna be a problem

  3. Chunk says:
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    Hello, wondering should I trade ty Hilton and McCoy to get Evans? Ten team ppr league. We start 2 rb 2 wr and one flex.

    My rbs are Gordon, ware, McCoy, Montgomery, rawls, d Lewis, ivory

    My wrs are Hilton, d Thomas, Montgomery, d Adams, Crabtree, and Coleman

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Chunk: it’s quite tempting , believe me…/ buuuuut man that’s two really good players ur giving up and would be screwed if Ware or Gordo hurt. I hate to say this but I’d probably hold

      • Chunk says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: alright, that’s how I fealt as well, originally offered McCoy and d Thomas and he came back with that offer… He still hasn’t turned down the first one so maybe I deny his and he still bites, dude needs a second rb badly. … Anyways thanks for your help and the great write ups

        • Tehol Beddict

          Tehol Beddict says:
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          @Chunk: always a great pleasure, Chunkster

  4. Brian says:
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    Just wondering why AJ Green and Eiefert are ranked as top 5 options at their positions but Dalton,s getting no love ? Wouldn’t QB have to have a good game for these 2 to score top 5 ? TY

  5. MJP says:
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    ROS half PPR Jennings or Rawls?

    • Tehol Beddict

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @MJP: I’m going with Rawls. Jennings is beyond worthless and Perkins is kind of on the rise.

  6. Ron says:
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    The “death tax”, as the gop are so fond of calling it, only applies to inheritance over 5.45 million dollars. If you don’t stand to inherit that much than you don’t have to worry. The people that really worry about this inheritance tax are billionares. And, as you probably know, billionares are often able to avoid taxes.

    So, it’s hard to tell if you are making a joke about the death tax or if you have been fooled into thinking it applies to you (well I hope it does!). Rich people like to make it seem like it does so that you carry their water.

    Anyway, gonna take a Xanax and sit in a dark room now.

    • Tehol Beddict

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Ron: dude, 5 million isnt what it used to be and imagine splitting it with say 3 other brothers and sisters or whoever and have it cut in half. I’m all for some large tax but it should be like anything over 20 million or so. that’s 980 million less than a billion. Taking money back from someone who earned it and paid taxes on it is a joke.

      • Ron says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: well Youre right I can only imagine inheriting 833k. I imagine that would be just awful. However, without looking I believe it’s 5million per person. Even if it isn’t the fact that you claiming that isn’t a huge sum to receive as a gift is a joke. 2) they didn’t earn it. It’s an inheritance tax. The person who earned it is dead or maybe they are an heir themselves. What’s important to keep in mind the people who are inheriting 5M, 10M, 20M, 50M, 100M , a billion, are the same people telling you and everyone else to work harder and “lift themselves by the bootstraps”. All the while inheriting a fucking huge sum from their daddy. 3) So you think 20M is the number. that’s fine. Just realize the GOP would fight tooth and nail to prevent “the death tax” on those inheriting 20 million dollars or more as well.

        • Tehol Beddict

          Tehol Beddict says:
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          @Ron: What’s the fucking point of saving money then? it’s the American dream to make something of yourself and leave something to your children. I dont understand what is being said here?

          • Rob says:
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            @Tehol Beddict: The death tax only affects the largest .2% of estates in the US.

            This conversation started because you say “rid this nation of the death tax” as if it is some issue that we’re all facing. That regular working people with fantasy football teams should get all fired up over a tax on the inherited multi-millions they can only dream about receiving.

            The reality is that the whole reason you (we) know or care about this tax is because the public has been essentially misled by the super rich into thinking it affects them when it doesn’t. So what is being said here is that the kind of language that you used furthers that cause, and it leads people to vote against their own interests and elect people with policies that are against their own interests.

            • Tehol Beddict

              Tehol Beddict says:
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              @Rob: I dont mean to rid it of the death tax. i would just recommend raising the number.

  7. The imp says:
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    In shallow 12 teamed with Palmer, cousins, Taylor, Winston on the wire are you keeping Dax as an ROS hold (shaky I know) or streaming QB (Palmer for now)?
    Thanks

    • Tehol Beddict

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @The imp: I personally am streaming Palmer this week. I also have Cousins. Don’t think you can go wrong with either. Dak is coo cuz he runs the ball also though. I think you are good either way but i like the upside of Palmer this week and say there’s a solid chance he turns it on for the ROS

  8. Jerry says:
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    Hey, Tehol. Eli Rodgers or Inman? Also, would you drop Rashad Jennings for Bibbs? Thanks!

    • Tehol Beddict

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Jerry: Inman for sure. I’d drop Rashad Jennings for a hot bag of nickels. but he’s still probably superior to Bibbs in fantasy I’m sorry to say!

  9. Fizz says:
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    Do you start doug martin over crowell if he suits up?

    • Tehol Beddict

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Fizz: I don’t think he’s suiting up but if so, sure. Fizz up

  10. Ralph Lifshitz

    Ralph Lifshitz says:
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    Are you going to man up and contact me, so we can have glorious shat talk sessions Sunday night or are you still going to “safe space” on me?

    • Tehol Beddict

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Ralph Lifshitz: im confused. are you in Seattle?

      • Ralph Lifshitz

        Ralph Lifshitz says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: I’m outside your parents house on the lake. I slept in the pool house last night….

        Seriously though email me brah! I’ve missed you!

        • Tehol Beddict

          Tehol Beddict says:
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          @Ralph Lifshitz: will do, senor . my love for you is deeper than the deepest trench in the world

  11. Timbo says:
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    Ahoy!

    For waiver wire Wednesday I accidentally dropped my paul Perkins for IDP Patrick Chung. I honestly didn’t even know I put this claim in, I could’ve been in a rush & the IDP player I was dropping on my team could’ve been close to Perkins; I was shocked & not too happy when I saw that lol!! Must’ve been lack of sleep wacky stuff!

    Well to reclaim Perkins seems impossible I’m last on the waiver & Perkins clears tomorrow AM.
    Would you worry about it or try & trade for Perkins by a very minor trade?

    My RBs are DJ, Melvin Gordon, Jeremy hill, Bibbs, Kenneth farrow(Gordon cuff), Ellington (DJ cuff).

    If I forget it with Perkins I can keep the slot open as I’d have to drop a player next week anyways since Ryan has bye. I’m eyeing cutler for week 11 he will be at Tampa.

    I’m also waiting to see if any league mates drop an extra QB, someone did just drop tyrod Taylor week 11 he’s at cincy

    Thanks!

    Roll with my pats D or drop my extra IDP for either Chargers (vs fins) or the Chiefs D (at Carolina) then drop that extra defense (Chargers or KC for a QB next week?)

    • Tehol Beddict

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Timbo: Yea id drop Bibbs for him. Tyrod is a savage and if you desperate for QB grab him but he has no weapons so I’d hesitate. and he who hesitates, masturbates and that’s cool sometimes.

      Like your last thought and Id grab Kansas City this week. Seahawks are gonna get in Pats ass like preparation H

      • Timbo says:
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        @Tehol Beddict:

        Thanks man!

        Just looked Starks,Damien Williams, , Alf Morris are available. My claim for Perkins was unsuccessful as another team added him

        So basically drop Chung for either Starks,d Williams, Morris. Available WRs if I go that route JJ Nelson, Coates, Eli Rogers,Davonte Parker

        I may just go with original plan & drop for Chiefs D then drop Chiefs D next week for a QB

        • Tehol Beddict

          Tehol Beddict says:
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          @Timbo: also get Starks wherever you can, good sir. it’s necessary for our mutual success.

  12. Mike in Busan says:
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    Lord Tehol, I crave pardon, but I have a conundrum. My RBs are crap, and I know not who to start. 12-team PPR, and I’ve got Deion Lewis, Isaiah Crowell, Christine Michael, with Latavius on a bye. I must start two of them, do I roll the dice that Deion plays or do I roll the dice that Christine produces?

    • Tehol Beddict

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Mike in Busan: whatever you crave shall be given. I’m rolling with the homey MIchael! He shall be known as the redeemer when we dismantle the Patriots on Sunday night football. I actually don’t think Michael is going to be great but there’s higher percentage he produces than Lewis in my opinion. Take it as you will

  13. Nightpandas says:
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    Would you trade My Gurley for Fitzgerald in a .5 ppr? It is a keep 3 but only one per position can be kept .(Thinking Ajayi might be a better fit as a keeper)

    My rbs are Ajayi, Gurley, Stewart, Bibbs, Rawls, Jaquizz

    My wr are Dez, Cooper, Crowder, Ri Matthews

    • Tehol Beddict

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Nightpandas: Mr. Panda, I would not. I can see your thinking here but Gurley still should go off at some point. I refuse to stop believing. And then you can wait and see if he’s your keeper. He should be.

  14. G says:
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    Hey man. I have my RB2 and flex to fill with Dion Lewis, Robert Kelly, and Tavon Austin. What do you think is the best combo here? Austin is boom or bust but plays the Jets which is a nice matchup. Kelly has a small sample. And Dion Lewis in his first game back is a mystery. Thanks in advance.

    • Tehol Beddict

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @G: Id go Kelly and Tavon. No way to expect anything from Lewis right out the gate. Seahawks in his bunghole

  15. Nick says:
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    Tehol! Been a bit since I dropped a comment on your posts…love the jabs at the dems as I voted to move on from corrupt politicians!

    Anyways, I’m 7-2 in my 10 team standard & debating between Snead or K Britt for WR3 this week, think your leaning Britt like most, right?

    Next, in my 12 team standard I’m 5-4 & need a flex this week between T West against Cleveland tonight or Ingram v. Denver on Sunday?

    Thanks as always bud!

    • Tehol Beddict

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Nick: Yep, got to be Britt. Snead get’s Denver which isnt good even without Talib.
      Im going West in that one too bruh. Ingram in that time share. West seems safer play but Ingram more upside. thanks for checking in.

  16. Christian Herman says:
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    Why so sure on Lockett? I trusted your prediction on Quincy for 70 & a tuddy on Monday against Zona & I feel this tingly feeling I’m gonna use lockett

    • Tehol Beddict

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Christian Herman: he’s got to be the difference and if you get return yards, even better. He’s just finally getting fully healthy and I’m seeing the explosion again. it’s only a matter of time. the Pats secondary is suspect

      • William Hung says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: I’ve been debating between Lockett and Meredith this week, but rolled with Meredith since outside of his last 2 games, he’s had a pretty good year.

  17. Nightpandas says:
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    Would you trade Cooper for Cooks? .5 ppr, looking at rest of year and as a potential keeper

  18. Nightpandas says:
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    Other option I got is to trade Gurley for D Thomas and Marshall.

    Leaves Ajayi, Stewart, Bibbs, Rawls, Rodgers at rb

    Currently have Dez, Cooper, Ri Matthews, Crowder at wr

  19. I don't want to brag but i have irritable bowel syndrome says:
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    income tax isn’t constitutional either.

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