As promised, I have completed my homework for this year’s upcoming auctions and am back to share the results. In part 3 of my “Points Per Dollar” series (Part 1, Part 2), I have put together my 2015 projections, converted them to fantasy points and compared each player against his current going auction value. For this data I have gathered the results of thousands of completed 2015 auctions. It’s important to note that in determining a player’s PPD you must use their going market value. Many sites, Razzball included, publish a cheatsheet of each player’s auction values. This is helpful as a guideline, but that’s all they are. Guidelines. It’s one thing for an expert to say Aaron Rodgers is worth $36, but what I really care about is the fact that he is actually going for $44 in real auctions. That’s a more indicative value as to what Rodgers will actually cost me on auction day.

Take me on in the Razzball Commenter Leagues here!

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12th-man-space-needle

Deja vu is “the phenomenon of having the strong sensation that an event or experience currently being experienced, has already been experienced in the past, whether it has actually happened or not.” The Seattle Seahawks are licking their wounds from a controversy-filled Super Bowl defeat. They dispatched of the NFC with a stout defense and dominant running game. The team was led by arguably the best running back in the game. His name is… Shaun Alexander.

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We are here today to point out the differences between the Razzball rankings and those that Yahoo has released to the masses. (Not to be confused with Yoohoo, which I do all the time. Then again, I usually confuse most things with chocolate drink. Totally normal.) Since we’ve already compared our rankings with ESPN, the next logical step is to have some amazing chocolate drink. Err, see what I mean? IT HAUNTS ME. I meant: the next logical step is to compare our rankings to Yahoo, THEN have some chocolate drink. Exactly. Maybe I’m just thirsty. Or hungry. Or all these things. All of the time.

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Greetings! Forgive me I’m not up to date on current sporting events, for Twitter, whom I fully depend on for all news and information, locked my account for a solid 24 hours! Any Quarterbacks get hurt? Did the Bills announce a starter? My life is meaningless without Twitter and the Elder Gods are known to punish me from time to time, usually when I’m riding high, basking in the glory of some incredible accomplishment, like the time I demoralized the Hilton sisters in a game of naked Twister. By demoralized, I mean that I gave both of them the profound type of hickory sticking that would make even the great Ray-J smile upon me like a proud father. Matter of fact, he was there filming it. Sorry, I’m rambling again, reminiscing about the heroic years that were my youth. But seriously, I haven’t been without Twitter for this long since the last time Sky locked me in his basement. Yes, Sky, I know: It puts the lotion on the skin!

Let’s talk quarterbacks, shall we? I am Tehol Beddict, and this is, Disgrace/Delight! Take heed!

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Gentlemen and four Ladies,

I know what you’re all thinking, “Who is this man-child showing off his above-average arsenal of hair products? Is this Grey from the past?” Now that’s humorous, and I’m not talking about my arm bone. That’d be humerus! Why would I write about that in the Football section of Razzball? I wouldn’t. Grey wrote about that on WebMD though, so you never know! I digress.

I’m here to introduce the 2015 Razzball Fantasy Football War Room. Get excited! I’ll preface my explanation with an apology for not getting this to the readers sooner. The Fantasy Football War Room was inspired by the one-and-only Fantasy Baseball War Room. It’s a great tool that I’ve used over the last few years to dominate my drafts. While developing my personal draft spreadsheet for football, I realized I could easily format it for use by the masses. There are features I hope to add in the future, but for the sake of time, I wanted to release the War Room while there was still an opportunity for Razzballers to use it!

So, let’s get down to brass tacks. Here is a brief rundown of what you’re getting in the 2015 Razzball Fantasy Football War Room:

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We are here today to point out the difference between the Razzball rankings and those that ESPN has released to the masses. The first difference you’ll probably notice is that there is no Mathew Berry in our rankings. Whether that’s a good or bad thing, I’ll let you decide. Because, hey, I’m just that kind of guy. Beyond that, well, ESPN certainly likes the color of red in their logo. RED EVERYWHERE. Well, touché, we also like a color. And that color is mustache, which is totally a color. Just ask Razzball founder Grey Albright. Not be outdone, I do run around with a five-day shadow on my face on most occasions, which technically counts as facial hair, and a mustache is also facial hair, ergo, the color of mustache. And sure, you could say that I’ve added some yellow to the palette with my face, but then you’d be raycess. Now that the main differences have been established, we’ll move on to things that are more fantasy relevant, well, depending on the type of fantasy that is. Hey now. So after you clear your internet history, we’ll be comparing our rankings to that of ESPN’s and their new “What the ef is this? Facebook? Are you serious” interface. Get yer knives ready!

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pir

If your league does not employ FAAB, then your commish must be a Commie! The traditional waiver wire process usually entails “rewarding” the last place team with the first waiver priority. I understand that it’s meant to “help” a team that performed poorly, but it amounts to a welfare system, as James Harrison so eloquently put recently. FAAB gives all teams a budget, usually $100-$200 for the whole season. Every team then has the ability to acquire any player on the waiver wire each week, contingent upon how much they are willing to pay for them. U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!!

Now that we’ve decided what the AMERICAN way to process the waiver wire is, here are some thoughts on how to navigate it successfully.

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A long time ago (about a year) in a galaxy (Razzball) far, far way…

Guess who’s back, back again. The Stats Machine’s back, tell a friend. Guess who’s back. Guess who’s back. Guess who’s back. Guess who’s back. Unlike most sequels that barely measure up to the original, the first two Godfather movies excluded, the second coming of the Stats Machine looks to build on a successful model, expanding and even deepening an already superb, numbers-driven effort. For those whom are unaware of, or need a refresher on the origin of the Stats Machine (TSM), you can find that here.

Take me on in the Razzball Commenter Leagues here!

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What a ride it’s been folks, and in this case, I’m actually not talking about your mother. Nope. I’m talking about way back (just a week ago), when we announced the formation of the 2015 Razzball Fantasy Football Commenter Leagues, and how you, the community responded. Now, just seven days since that historic (HISTORIC I TELL YA) event, we have already created more than half of all the leagues we had last year. How cool is that? Very cool if you ask me. And even very cool if I ask you, which I think I might have just did. So we’re all cool. I have established our coolness. Now that we are getting closer to the season, we’re here to once again and remind you that we want to give you cool stuff just for playing fantasy football with us. See? I told ya we were cool. That’s right, if you haven’t joined now, you still can! Leagues and teams are being created everyday (including the expansion of the RCL’s into IDP formats!), and you can be one of them! Want to find out how? I know you do… follow me after the jump. (And to check out all of our cool prizes, click here!)

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Greetings! Serious question: Do any of you fine people have any recommendations for surgeons that treat third degree burns? I only ask for the fact that I’ve been absolutely ON FIRE as of late. Tis true, I’ve completed two fantasy drafts thus far, laying wood to the opposition like a meth’d out beaver. Unfortunately, I had to witness two people draft Jordy Nelson, AFTER the news came out that he tore his ACL. SMFH. Guy, guys, guys (and girls), Big Daddy Beddict expects more out of you, for I want you to experience the sweet taste of winning a multitude of fantasy football championships. Working under such boss hogs like Grey Albright and Jay Long has allowed me to suck on the teat of greatness for a few years now, and the milk from those glorious men now runs through my veins, flowing like the Nile river, which leaves me with a quarter chub at all time. Say one thing for Tehol Beddict, he’s confident walking around ass naked in the mens locker room. And it’s all because of my aforementioned heroes! I’m thinking I took one too many benzos for my neck pain, for I’m having a hard time keeping my eyes open. Better get right to it!

I am Tehol Beddict and this is Disgrace/Delight! Take heed!

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