Razzball Nation!  In a very special Tuesday recording time, we give thanks to Canada for giving us beavers, syrup, a change to the podcast schedule, and Nick.  This week we discuss how Nick’s Writer’s League team at 0-6 is the yin to my 6-0’s yang, address naming conventions in Newfoundland, and then throw in some NFC notes.  JayWrong then calls in with his AFC notes hungover from the huge Chargers win last night, then Murph updates us on injuries and Sky let’s us know the waiver wire adds you need to consider.  Good luck to everyone in week 7!

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2013 RCL FootballAnother big week of RCL action wrapped up in week 6, and again I get to go nuts for my 6-0 Writer’s League team!  Sorry JayWrong, but this week went just like your R.A. Dickey defense when I told Nick to sell, sell, sell.  Jay had like, a million Chargers going, and similar to his optimism for Dickey’s second half, he had to watch his hopes and dreams prove JayWrong’s name sake.  Hey, at least the Chargers and Panthers won this week!  Beers all around!  Be sure to check out the full interactive 2013-2014 RCL Standings tab up under “Leagues” that shows you how you’re stacking up against your Razzball competitors in your journey to RCL glory.

RCL Top ScorerTOP SCORER: Congratulations to team Poon Jab from the Razzball Rebels league, who topped the 200-point plus benchmark and the only team to score over 200 this week.  Poon got to 200.34 led by Larry Fitzgerald, Jamaal Charles, Knowshon Moreno, Reggie Bush, and the KC D to vault him (or her, I guess) to a 200-point week and a beat down of It’s like a circle.  Team Jab also moves to 5-1 and leads the Rebels in overall scoring for the most fearless Rebel in the league.  Poon has a great shot to move to 6-1 as they face the 1-5 Blountville Bums, who’s picture of a sad puppy dog I think encapsulates their mood heading into that matchup.  Great work again Poon and keep up the high scoring for your run at the RCL gold!

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Unfortunately I am not Bryan Cranston or Jessie Pinkman (he plays himself, right?) and I am not Breaking Bad.  Well I am in the Razzball Writer’s League!  Wait, by breaking bad I mean doing good.  Kinda the antithesis of my metaphor here.  Scrap that open – I’m too lazy to hold down delete though…

Whilst I break bad in the Razzball Writer’s league, I’m looking at a 4-1 then two 3-2 and two 2-3 teams.  I know you’re yelling at your computer, “I don’t care about JB’s leagues!”  But what I’m trying to get at is that week 6 is right when I want to be sure I’m breaking mediocrity.  If I’m below .500 heading into week 6 it means I’m 2-4 and probably toast.  Or 1-5 or 0-6, and only consuming alcohol.  So in those two 2-3 record leagues, I’m staring down the barrel of some really horrible matchups.  I feel like the Jags this week.

And if you’re looking for one the absolute sweetest blue ice fantasy contests this weekend, DraftKings still has an exclusive double up contest for us at Razzball that has a ton of spots open.  Easiest way to double your money you’ll find all weekend.  Unless of course, you want to risk working for Heisenberg – and by that I mean in ABQ not any of the RCL teams!  (Sky is going to get angry for using Breaking Bad references in my open since that’s his meth, isn’t he?  But I’m the one who knocks!)

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Razzball Nation!  DraftKings is back, and if you haven’t won it big in any of the bigger DraftKings contests with a big field, there’s always tournaments running every Sunday with smaller prize pools and a better chance of winning.  DraftKings has given us a contest this week for Razzballers to double up in a $10 Double Up Contest where only 20 players enter and 10 leave with $20.  They’re obviously not making a profit on this one as it’s a lot like the Razzball exclusive contests we had this past year on Baseball.  So be sure to sign up and talk some smack come Sunday!

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2013 RCL FootballAnother big week of RCL action wrapped up in week 5, with the ranks of the undefeated dwindling down yet again.  Looking at you – me!  Woo – let’s go Writer’s Team! Be sure to check out the full interactive 2013-2014 RCL Standings tab up under “Leagues” that shows you how you’re stacking up against your Razzball competitors in your journey to RCL glory.

RCL Top ScorerTOP SCORER: Congratulations to team Makka Pakka from the Monday Morning QB’s league, who was the only RCL team to top 200 points this week!  Is Makka Pakka a Simpsons reference based on your team picture?  With a fantasy explosion of goodness from Peyton, Dez, Nicks and Blackmon, it was the Monday Night breakout from Jacquizz that vaulted Makka Pakka into the RCL spotlight with 208.56 points.  Despite the win, Pakka is still in third place with a 3-2 record, as those beloved kitchen stinks still hold onto the top spot even after getting the wrong side of that Pakka outburst.  Great work again Pakka and enjoy your time in the RCL Sun!

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The Razzball Podcast is back!  It’s great to be back in the DraftKings studio after sitting out last week, but hey it was the Panthers bye so I took a bye too.  Although to be fair, the Panthers took another bye this week and I didn’t!  I’m the consummate professional!  Nick I and go over the NFC notes and what it means for your fantasy team, along with a DraftKings look-in and the RCL top scorer through Sunday.  JayWrong then dives into the AFC quick-hitters while Sky gives us the waiver-wire guys to nab.  Murph was going to call in the carnage report, but with that last shot of rum, he had to add himself to the report!  Good luck to everyone tonight if your game is hinging on Monday Night Football (looking at you Julio Jones) and good luck in week 5!

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So I know you’re all wondering – what do these Razzball guys really do with their lives!?  Spoiler!  You already know if you read Basketball.  Oh well…

If you don’t read/play Fantasy Basketball – give it a chance!  Start up an RCL League!  If you haven’t played it much, it’s the perfect blend of Fantasy Football and Baseball.  “Wait – why is JB shamelessly pandering?!  I thought he was gonna tell us about his life fighting crime!”   Whilst I keep the rogue streets of North Cackalacky free from the seedy (pork)underbelly of crime, I have unfortunately shifted my sleep schedule.  I had to buy a blast shield for my windows.  It was like I was in the Peach Trees Mega Block when Judge Dredd came.  Fortunately Michael Caine IS NOT my butler and that scene from Batman Begins didn’t happen where Bale goes – “Bats are nocturnal!”  I woulda just slapped that foo’.  Long, disheveled and borderline lunatic rantings aside (those last couple of sentences could’ve been from a Tehol article… Never go full Tehol!) – my point is I’ll be getting to your LSDs closer to noon than right away.  It also means I’m writing this up on my Palm Pilot while staking out the mean streets of the Triangle on Saturday Night.  So if anything changes dramatically on Sunday Morning, I’ll get to it before kickoff!

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So, you want to be a fantasy #1 stunna?  DraftKings is back with another $2 Qualifier into the Millionaire Grand Final where for only two measly Washingtons you could end up with 10,000 Franklins!  What would you do with a mil?  Well I asked my financial advisors the Big Tymers who recommended I buy  “a new car, and spend about a million with a mother##%$&’ driver seat sittin’ in the middle!”  And I said that didn’t even rhyme!  I don’t get rap sometimes…  But I do understand being fantasy’s #1 stunna, with the biggest payday you’ll ever find in fantasy, unless of course you can con your way into Bill Gates and Warren Buffet’s fantasy league.  “What’s that Bill, you’re owning the league right now with all the Broncos?  I’m gonna make a call real quick and buy the Broncos and bring back Tebow!”  So if you’re looking for that kind of power, hop in a DraftKings contest today and beat the field in the Week 17 Grand Finale!

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2013 RCL FootballWeek 4 of RCL action is in the books, and it was a big scoring week with the big outputs from the Prime Time games, so a lot of teams have made big strides in climbing up the leader board.  If you still haven’t taken a gander yet, we’ve got the full interactive 2013-2014 RCL Standings tab up under “Leagues” that shows you how you’re stacking up against your Razzball competitors in your journey to RCL glory.

RCL Top ScorerTOP SCORER: Well it was a heart stopper indeed with the Heart Stoppers crushing the RCL ecosystem this week from the Hernandez Hit Men league, putting up 217.02 points in an epic week amongst elite weeks.  A team featuring Brees, Gonzo, Foster, is always going to have a chance to score it big, but it was the surprise big game from Nate Washington and the solid streaming move of the Colts D against the Jags that put the Stoppers over the top(pers).  Despite the huge week, the Stoppers move to 2-2 and only 7th place, with scott’s Team the only undefeated squad left in the Hit Men league.  Everyone put a bounty on scott!  Congrats again Heart Stoppers for becoming an RCL legend!

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Happy Sunday, Razzball Nation!  If you’re like me, waking up for Sunday during football season is a morning filled with hope, dreams, optimism.  Then you go nuts in your head thinking, “what if the Panthers actually do win?”  Then they just shellac the Giants, and I felt like I was in a Twilight Zone.  Maybe because I am a fantasy nerd (all people who put “expert” after fantasy in the terminology are kidding themselves – NERDS!!!), I sometimes dream about sports – and typically about vastly skewed numbers.  What, T.Y. Hilton got 223 Yards and 4 TDs?!  Something like that.  So while my Panthers put up a scoreline that I literally couldn’t even subconsciously comprehend, I had a fantasy team in my dynasty league put up the lowest score I’ve ever had in 10+ years.  It was like being a few levels deep in Inception.  I may never make it out alive!  Save me, Leo!  Save me!

Here’s to a week where things balance back out to normal, Roddy White getting over a bum ankle, Ray Rice being able to gut it out, and everything else fantasy owners need to right their sinking ships.

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