It was 16-3. Zach Wilson (9-for-18, 92 yards, 1 INT) looked on at the field at MetLife Stadium, having accounted for 93 yards of total offense and one turnover through nearly three quarters of play. Enter Chris Streveler, certified gladiator and champion of men. Recently activated off the practice squad, the former Winnipeg Blue Bombers star instantly reinvigorated the Jets offense, producing 144 total yards — 51 more than Wilson — in just one quarter of play while not turning over the football. Newly-minted as my hero, Streveler showed heart and grit, and most importantly, that he was willing to put his body on the line and do anything for the players next to him. That’s not something we have seen Wilson do. Wilson doesn’t yet understand how to be a leader and more importantly, can’t comprehend how to read a defense. He is not a starting NFL quarterback, and never will be. Say all you want about arm strength and projectability, but it only goes so far. I have a bottle of ketchup in my fridge that has the size, shape and squirt to be an elite mustard, but what’s inside is simply never going to change. Last night should be a lesson Streveler’nd for us all. Unfortaunely, I don’t think it will be for Wilson. Anyway, here’s what else I saw in another riveting edition of Thursday Night Football.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Okay, Razzball fam. Can we be honest about something? Ray-Ray McCloud III sounds like he should be catching passes from Tyroil Smochie-Wallace. And I’m still not sure if I’ve been spelling Jauan Jennings’ name correctly. Is it linking in this post? Unfortunately, if you were a wide receiver last night, it didn’t matter how recognizable your name was. You fell short, while the tight ends and Christian McCaffrey stole the show. Yes, George Kittle and Brock Purdy were awesome despite only connecting four times. They did it when it mattered and they did so in chunks. Which is exactly what I have been spewing the past several hours as a heavy-share Brandon Aiyuk owner. We’ll sort out that mess and more below as I reveal what else I saw in the Week 15 edition of Thursday Night Football.

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Skeptics of head coach Jeff Saturday certainly have fodder after last night’s performance. The 3-7 Steelers headed to Indianapolis to visit the 4-6-1 Colts for the Week 12 Monday Night Football matchup. Expectations were low, and the Colts certainly delivered on those low expectations. NFL MNF Week 12 NFL MNF Week 12 NFL MNF Week […]

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Welcome to Thursday Bite Football, Week 12 — the Thanksgiving Edition. It’s where you come to hide from your in-laws’ salt-and-pepper-crusted casseroles for all of 10 solitary minutes before returning to the madness of the holiday season. Or perhaps you’re out Black Friday shopping, pushing over grandmothers and little kids alike while bustling through the aisles and reading these delicate words. Wherever you may be, hopefully, you had the chance to inhale some home cooking and play some good, old-fashioned stump in the backyard with those you love, because that’s what it’s really all about — at least in my family. Throwing sharp, metal objects in the air and smashing nails into a log alongside close friends and family while Luke Combs wails in the background and someone’s fat uncle snoozes in the corner.

While I was doing all of that, I was also watching a riveting Thanksgiving slate (or plate) of NFL Football. Here’s what I saw:
While I was doing all of that, I was also watching a riveting Thanksgiving slate (or plate) of NFL Football. Here’s what I saw:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I’m a big fan of the Motor City Kitties. Their 40+ year continuous tank job has set the stage for many a successful Vikings team. Throughout early 2022, the Lions have given fantasy managers so many gifts, and so many headaches. On Sunday, the Detroit Lions blew past the the 7-2 New York Giants, improving to 4-6 on the year and hunting down second place in the NFC North. How’d they do it? The way we all expected: 3 touchdowns from Jamaal Williams and Justin Jackson finishing as the leading rusher. Sigh. At least we’ve got Amon-Ra St. Brown cosplaying as Scrooge with his targets. Tis the season! 

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I’ve been a Vikings fan for a near-intolerable three decades of my life. I’m pretty critical of Kirk Cousins, which is justified and a taek that everybody likes to hear week in and week out, right? The 2022 NFL season gave us several of the worst games in recent and distant memory, but Bills/Vikings games lit up the internet with one of the most dramatic final 2 minutes of regulation followed by a dramatic end zone interception to finish the game in the Vikings’ favor. If only every quarter could be the fourth quarter. 

Maybe one day your team will be as cardiac-stopping as mine. Let’s see what else happened for week 10 of 2022 fantasy football. 

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If you have spent any time reading this column, you know that it has been a tough year for the NFL’s Thursday Night Football. Luckily, that all changed this week thanks in part to the uber-talented rosters of the Atlanta Falcons and Carolina Panthers going head-to-head. There’s not much that gets a football fan’s blood boiling more than a querterback showdown of Marcus Mariota and PJ Walker, and running back rooms fronted by Cordarrelle Patterson and D’Onta Foreman. Add in five field goals in four quarters and you’ve got yourself an instant classic on primetime TV. Now, this wasn’t the worst game of the season, not by any stretch of the imaginiation. But top fantasy options like Patterson (2.5 half-PPR points), Kyle Pitts (3.8 points) and DJ Moore (4.9 points) all crapped the bed, while Foreman (19.0 points), Laviska Shenault (13.4 points) and Drake London (12.3 points) shined to varying degrees. Safe to say, this was not a joyous day for most fantasy owners. Memes portraying Mariota as a trash can in a squad car have surfaced, which is honestly an insult to garbage disposal devices everywhere. This game was really between the Splatlanta Fartcons and the Terdalina Pantnerds. And yes, that is really the best I could come up with. It’s clearly time for some deep introspection. 

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I’ve already spilled digital ink about what it’s like to overstay your glory years. Those of you who follow me on the baseball side know that I’m all for Justin Verlander retiring. Almost nobody his age succeeds as a pitcher, and every stat-based mind out there could see that Verlander’s 2022 year was less-impressive under-the-hood than it was on the surface. So, how much sense does it make that he should take the championship ring, retire on top his career, and let fans never question “What could have been?” Because we’re seeing that happen with Aaron Rodgers every week. The Packers have dropped 5 straight and have a bit of a Murderer’s Row to face to finish out the season. After putting up 9 points and losing star running back Aaron Jones to an ankle injury, the storied Packers franchise look one step closer to a complete rebuild. Despite Halloween being in the past, the tricks keep rolling in for our fantasy teams. 

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My main takeaway from Week 9 of Thursday Night Football is that the Houston Texans have a lot of players that I have never heard of. That either means I’m really bad at my job, or that the Houston front office is even more lackluster at theirs. Four tight ends in this game were projected to score fantasy points, including the Texans’ Jordan Akins and some guy named Brevin Jordan. But it was in fact TE Teagan Quitoriano, projected for zero points in this matchup, who put Houston ahead, 7-0, with a two-yard touchdown reception from QB Davis Mills in the first quarter. Also of news: the Texans have players named Chris Moore (4 receptions, 43 yards, 1 TD) and Tyron Johnson (1 reception, eight yards). This is a real thing. On the Eagles’ side, QB Jalen Hurts (21-27, 243 yards, 2 TD; 9 carries, 23 yards) and WR A.J. Brown (4 receptions, 59 yards, 1 TD) were up to their usual tricks, but it was TE Dallas Goedert (8 receptions, 100 yards, 1 TD) and RB Miles Sanders (17 carries, 93 yards, 1 TD) who really kicked HC Lovie Smith (1 really white beard, 1 win, 6 losses) in the crotch.

Here’s what else I saw in another riveting edition of Thursday Night Football.

Please, blog, may I have some more?