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I have to admit the pickings are slim on the waiver wire this week. There are a lot of guys coming off solid performances in week 10 who just have bye weeks in week 11 that I think you should keep an eye on. Former 2nd round pick Zay Jones for example had the best game of his career putting up 23 fantasy points in week 10 now that he finally has a real quarterback in — wait a minute — Matt Barkley?! Frank Gore had himself another double-digit rushing attempt game and actually did something with it putting up 12 fantasy points, but he’s resting in week 11 too. Baker Mayfield had his best fantasy game of the year with 22 fantasy points in week 10 — but again, bye week. For these bye week players, you’re welcome to add them now, but just know they’ll be filling up your bench for the week.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Adam Humphries, 2.7%, vs WSH: I told you to grab him after week 9 — you only have yourself to blame! This is now the third week in a row where Humphries was second to Mike Evans in targets, however Evans and Humphries couldn’t have had two different days. Humphries was the second-highest scoring WR in the league while Evans only hauled in 1 of his 10 targets for 16 yards…

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Chris Godwin (vs CLE): All Chris Godwin has done is catch a TD in 4 of his 5 games this season and netted 13 points or more in all 4 of those games. There are a lot of hungry mouths in the Bucs receiving game, but with Jameis Winston back in the fold I can see all those baby birds getting fed by mama Winston especially against a Browns team that has surrendered the 5th most receiving yards.

O.J. Howard (vs CLE): Another mouth to feed in Tampa Bay? Yea, but Howard was well fed even before Winston’s return. In his last three games played he’s had 18 fantasy points, 13 fantasy points and 16 fantasy points respectively. Howard will continue to gobble up a decent amount of targets even against a Browns secondary that has been a little stingy to opposing TEs. Should I end this eating analogy now? OM NOM NOM!

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Jameis Winston (@ ATL): Jameis Winston and a guy named Chester in the same article and I’m not making that the headline? I deserve some praise for my maturity. It’s already been reported that Winston will be QB1 in Atlanta in week 6. The Falcons are tied for second-most TD passes allowed and are 10th in passing yards allowed and have allowed 20+ fantasy points to their opposing QBs in 4 straight games now. Jameis is only 12.6% owned and just like with Baker Mayfield — he won’t be that available for long.

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After dropping 32 on New England, Blake Bortles (@ KC) responded the next week with a turd against Tennessee before bouncing back for 23 points against the Jets. Week 5 sees Bortles heading to Kansas City to face the Chiefs who allowed 3 passing TDs a piece in weeks 1 & 2, 2 TD passes in week 3 — and as I’m writing this they’ve held Case Keenum off the board. Blake Bortles is better than anyone gives him credit for — well — he’s at least better than Case Keenum…

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Peyton Barber is in the midst of another pathetic game as I’m writing this. He’s at 8 rushing attempts for 33 yards and I don’t see that number growing more than that. If the Buccaneers are serious about winning they’ll release their rookie RB Ronald Jones on the league for week 4. Either way — he’ll make his debut soon and have no one in his way from quickly gaining RB1 status. He’s currently unowned in about 80% of leagues, but smart owners (that’s you!) will start sitting on him now to reap the benefits later.

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Me before every draft this year. I’m not invited back. I’ll admit it. My first love is fantasy baseball. But over the past few years fantasy football has become my mistress. Now usually I don’t boast or brag, but today is different — usually in late August/early September, I’ve got baseball playoffs on the brain. That’s still the case this year (#humblebrag) but there’s just something in this New Jersey air that’s making me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Maybe it’s because I’m going to the Giants/Jaguars game this Sunday. Maybe it’s because last year the Giants were out of contention by week 5. Or maybe, it’s because the Giants parlayed that 3-13 record last year into their second overall pick of Saquon Barkley. I haven’t been this excited about a Giants running back since Brandon Jacobs that one time. Or maybe it’s the air pollution…

Now to get into what you’re really here for. Every Tuesday I’ll be giving you the straight dirt on who you need to get your twisted, gnarled, dirty football fingers on. Maybe there’s backup running back who is due for some added snaps because the starter is just a jabroni. Maybe there’s a third string wide receiver who is about to face the Colts porous defense and you need someone who can reach for that brass ring. Or maybe there’s just someone with a dope name who I just can’t ignore any longer (Hi JuJu!) Whatever the case may be — every Tuesday you need to come here as you turn your attention to laying the smacketh down on your next opponent.

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You gotta groove. You gotta sway. You gotta flow. It takes a certain amount of swagger (or just Latin hips?) to really pull off the salsa dance like we see above. And yet, spread the word to the masses, we finally got to see that beautiful salsa dance again on Sunday! Welcome back Victor Cruz! Thank you for letting us glimpse the joy, the beauty and the underrated nature of the salsa dance after you played your first game in 700 calendar days and scored a TD in the process. With you complimenting Odell Beckham Jr. and the sterling rookie Shepard (that was fun), the Giants passing attack should be among the best in the league. And would ya look at that, Cruz is widely unowned in leagues as of the Tuesday morning after Week 1.

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And another one… These injuries man, do they ever stop? Can we go a week this season without a slew of catastrophic injuries that impact all of our teams? This week, the Gods of Football claimed Patriots star receiver and JCC flag football legend Julian Edelman. As if it wasn’t bad enough that Dion Lewis was stripped from all our lives last week, this week we lose a top-5 PPR asset. You know the old expression; the Giants defense giveth and the Giants defense taketh away. At this point, we should all be pretty familiar with the immediate pickup in the wake of OG King Julian’s injury. It’s old pal and wavier wire Week 7 darling Danny Amendola. Now, when Danny isn’t rocking suits with no belt (ever heard of a tailor?), he’s acting as the second receiver in the Patriots machine of an offense. Just 30% owned in Yahoo leagues (and an even lower 21% on ESPN), Amendola should be your top priority add this week. I’d expect WR2 numbers from ole’ Danny from here on out. This is going to be one of your few plug and play adds heading into the playoffs, so claim away.

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I woke up this morning with a pain in my heart. I couldn’t quite place what caused it, but it was there. So instead of indulging this pain by calling out sick, and moping around the house all day in those super comfy plaid fleece pants, I decided to go to work and go about my day as if the pain wasn’t there. But it was there, oh it was there. I was just in denial, I knew what the pain was, and I knew what caused it. But I was holding out hope that maybe, just maybe, it wasn’t as bad as I thought. But there I was, 1:30 pm EST in the front conference room at the office in a meeting with clients. My phone buzzed, and when I peered down at my screen it was just as I had feared “Dion Lewis out for season with ACL tear”. At that moment, I let out a primal scream that could only be matched by the sound of my mighty swinging scrotum pounding the inner-thighs of Tehol’s wiz. This is my fate for making light of all you Charles, Bell, and Foster owners in past weeks. In one awkward step a dream was lost, and a little piece of me died. I stand before you jaded and less innocent to life’s unfair twists, than I did a week ago. Now, as we always do, we pickup the pieces, recollect, and hit the wire…

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As we pick up the pieces in Week 8’s aftermath, the injury Gods have once again smiled on me, and shat on all of you. In last week’s post, I proclaimed that I was rooting for injuries from here on out, and as Megadeath once said, “Killing is my business… and business is good!” So do I care that Le’Veon Bell’s knee crumbled like Tehol’s self respect after being tricked into trappin’ on a weekend trip to FLA? No! No, I do not. My job is not to sob with you, oh no. My job is to slap you in the face, get you to man up, stop crying, and prepare for the war ahead. I’m like General Patton, but for fantasy sports and with a Jewish last name. I think the easiest way to put it is, we got injuries y’all. There is a very solid chance that there is a team out there that three weeks ago boasted Jamaal Charles, Arian Foster, Steve Smith, and Joseph Randle. That guy was probably pretty smug at the time, because his team was probably pretty good. Now he’s panicking like a cabbage in an Irish garden. If you were a good friend, you’d send him here, tell him to ask a question, and let him know it will be alright. If you’re anything like me, you’d give him some bad advice, send him here for even worse advice, and bluntly state “You’re screwed Brah”. But let’s forget that hypothetical owner for a moment, his girlfriend is too hot for him anyway, and he smells like mothballs. We got injuries on injuries this week, so let’s get into it. Here are your wavier wire adds for Week 9 of Fantasy Football…

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Three words Jim Bob Cooter. Why do I begin this week’s edition of Through The Wire with the name of the Lions newly promoted Offensive Coordinator? Not because I feel his advancement will have any sort of positive impact upon the Lions offense. No, not at all, but for two very specific reasons, that are completely unrelated to football.

1. His birth name isn’t Jim Bob. It’s is in fact James Robert Cooter. To this I say he chose the Jim Bob life. That says a great deal about a person.

2. He’s a creep who likes to get a little silly, by breaking into woman’s bedrooms and stripping down to his tightie whities.

So now that I’ve been given my medium to express my feelings of appreciation for all that is The Coot, let’s move on to more pressing matters.I not going to do what everybody thinks I’m going to, and that’s talk about the Arian Foster injury and freak out man. Instead I’m going to quite simply state that I’m rooting for injuries at this point. So Arain Foster’s torn Achilles, good for business. On that note, here are your Week 8 wavier wire adds.

Please, blog, may I have some more?