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Welcome back, my horde, to the first official hit it or quit it for the 2016 season!  Sure, I teased you all a little bit with some of my draft and preseason action, but this is the real thing, baby!  Hopefully, you all made it through week 1 without my “Black Widow Curse” taking out your first round draft picks?  I know I made it unscathed this week.  I think I am finally getting the hang of this thing and embracing the evil that is this curse rather than trying to fight it.  I know a couple of you lost some people, and for that, I wish I could say I was sorry, but I am embracing the evil, remember?  So, at least I can make it up to you some way by maybe giving you some people to target this coming week.  Because, after all, I am not a girl who just takes.  I know the importance of giving as well as receiving, especially if we are going to make this love affair last.  So, without further ado, here you are my loyal creeps, weirdos, perverts, geeks, convicts, inmates and overall degenerates, Hit It or Quit It, Week 2.

Will Fuller, WR, Houston Texans There was some speculation that Will Fuller, being an NFL virgin and all, would have a lot to live up to, especially playing opposite DeAndre Hopkins, but Week 1 showed us what I have been telling you all along, even virgins know what they are doing.  It’s kind of like a natural talent with some of them, I suppose.  In Week 1, Fuller managed 5-of-11 targets for 107 yards and a touchdown in Houston’s win over Chicago.  Despite some prior speculation that his hamstring injury (which seemed to slow him down all week) was going to limit his playing time, he showed no signs that this was the case.  Sure, he dropped a potential would-be 83-yard score in the second quarter, but that is to be expected.  We can’t all be as perfect as me.  Bottom line is, he has some big-play potential and at only 40-50% owned in most leagues, you may be able to snatch him up as an upside WR3 in week 2 against Kansas City.  Go on, you know you want the untainted meat.  Do it.  Hit it.

Keenan Allen, WR, San Diego Chargers – This one is a no-brainer, but undoubtedly, there are those of you out there who, for whatever reason, were not able to come out from under your rocks and did not hear that Allen tore his right ACL and is out for the season, because I see that he is still owned in 98% of leagues.  And yes, waivers haven’t hit yet (that’s later tonight), but I can’t tell you how many owners leave a player like this on their bench. Sure, you can hold out hope that he will be back, but we all know how it goes with ACL’s.  Sorry, Keenan, it seems you were the first prey of my Black Widow Curse this season.  If you are a Chargers sympathizer and really want to stay in-bred with the team, you can always look for Travis Benjamin or Dontrelle Inman to see more work.  Or, if you are feeling particularly randy, Danny Woodhead and Antonio Gates are also in the running for more work.  Or, you could just realize when over means over and just go for one of the Hit it’s I have at the beginning of this article.  Either way, it’s your call.  Sorry Keenan, just like 2015, we’ll have to Quit it.

Chris Hogan, WR, New England Patriots – I managed to pick up Hogan in my later rounds in one of my drafts and made the mistake of benching him Week 1, consequently losing out on 13.50 fantasy points.  Sure, that may not seem like much to most of you, but I am a point whore and want to suck them up as much as possible.  But I digress.  Hogan played 56-of-73 snaps in Week 1, roped in 3-of-4 targets for 60 yards and a 37-yard touchdown on the opening drive.  He is only about 30% owned in most leagues, but this may be one pick-up you want to try to snatch.  Sure, when Gronkowski returns, Hogan may not see quite as many targets, but bottom line is, unlike many of my first dates, Hogan made quite the impression and may have played Brandon Williams right out of a job.  My beloved Pats have Miami in Week 2, so consider Hogan your WR3/4 and go to town if you need it.  You know you want to.  It can be our dirty little secret.  Hit it.

Tyrod Taylor, QB, Buffalo Bills  This Quit it pick surely won’t win me any love with Tehol Beddict, but let’s face it, I could pretty much do anything and Tehol would still love me anyway, right, Tehol?  Anyway, back to this…Taylor took some pretty nasty hits in Week 1 along with two sacks which left coach Rex Ryan to question if his team had the ability to keep Taylor safe all season.  Taylor did manage to complete 15-of-22 passes for 111 yards and didn’t get intercepted, so that’s something right?  Taylor only managed to garner fantasy owners 5.5 points this past week, and if he continues to take more hits as often as he has in Week 1, then don’t expect him to be able to make it all season.  There are other options out there.  Go on and love him, just do it from a distance like the stalker living in my bushes.  Quit it.

Tevin Coleman, RB, Atlanta Falcons – Do you like to double up on your fun?  I know I do. Hey, I think I have already established that I am one of a kind, right?  It seems that Atlanta likes the double-team as well, and Coleman is part of that juicy goodness.  He teamed up with Devonta Freeman in preseason and it seems like that duo has carried their experience over to the regular season with Coleman seeing 32 snaps to Freeman’s 36.  On the other hand, Coleman seems to be carrying the workload in this duo finishing week 1 with 117 yards on 13 touches while Freeman rubbed out 40 yards on 15 carries.  Coleman also bailed out Matt Ryan a few times turning check downs into some big plays.  When it comes to threesomes, someone always ends up doing most of the work and for now, it looks like that someone is Tevin Coleman.  Expect Coleman to continue to have an expanded role in this offense.  If you are in the market for an RB because my Black Widow Curse took yours out, don’t be afraid to get a little frisky with your action.  Coleman is only about 42% owned in most leagues.  Go on, Hit it.

Jimmy Graham, TE, Seattle Seahawks – I remember the good old days when Jimmy Graham was the top pick in drafts and no one said anything about someone picking him over a WR or RB in the early rounds.  But lo, those days are long gone.  Even a change of scenery does not bode well for the once mighty Graham.  After rupturing his patellar tendon last season, it is uncertain if Graham will be back to his former glory and if so, how long before the bottom falls out again.  Right now, he is not seeing a full complement of snaps and will not be a fantasy option until he proves himself and shows that he can at least handle half of the weekly snaps.  If you are feeling particularly sentimental for the good old days, you can always feel free to stash him as a TE2, but with a lot of other healthy and fresh meat out there, there should be no reason to.  Sorry Jimmy, it’s not you, it’s me…oh, wait, that’s right, it is you.  Quit it.

Mike Wallace, WR, Baltimore Ravens – Look, we have all been in relationships in the past where it just hasn’t worked out, right?  Okay, well, Mike Wallace just happens to be in more of those than most of us, but it seems that he finally found “The One.”  Okay, I also know what you are about to say…”Baltimore has a deep receiver corps and he will probably not see that much playing time…blah, blah, blah…”  I am sorry, I thought we were playing Fantasy Football here and not planting petunias?  It is a shame when a woman has bigger balls than you, but when that woman is me, it is expected, so onward, shall we?  Wallace caught 3-of-6 targets for 91 yards and a touchdown in Week 1.  He shared some time opposite Steve Smith, Sr, but only saw three less targets than Smith’s team high of 9.  He also seems to have found the right one with his relationship with Joe Flacco since the two of them connected for a 66-yard touchdown after Wallace blew by Duke Williams.  Still not convinced and caught up in that receiver corps bullshit?  Okay, well, first, get your dick out of your wife or girlfriend’s purse and remember, Wallace has the best chance to lead the team in yardage and big play action.  Take a risk and go for some thrills.  You need a WR and Wallace can finally give it to you the way you always wanted him to.  Hit it.

Gary Barnidge, TE, Cleveland Browns – [Jay’s Note: This post was written before RG3 was placed on the IR…] He may be pretty to look at, but that’s about it.  I like a man who is good with his hands and after his Week 1 performance I think it is safe to say that Barnidge is not good with his hands.  He was targeted twice and both times dropped the passes.  He also does not seem to fit in well with Robert Griffin III who seems to like to challenge defenses on deep passes.  Add in the fact that even with this, RGIII has a pretty decent receiver corps with Terrelle Pryor and Corey Coleman.  Also, don’t forget that Josh Gordon will be will be returning soon as well.  Sure, Barnidge stepped up for me in 2015 when I needed a TE.  He was there for me, and I will always be thankful to the fantasy Gods for that, but let’s face it, this isn’t 2015.  Barnidge was a thing of the past and his 0.00 Fantasy points this past week should be enough for you to run for the hills.  Get your satisfaction elsewhere.  Quit it.

 

 

Well, there you have it my loyal Horde.  Week 2 of the 2016 edition of Hit It or Quit It is in the bag.  Love me, hate me, whatever, I’m the one with the article.  Remember to follow me on Twitter @Soxfan012 for all of my awesomeness and a sprinkle of shenanigans from time to time.  Until next week, remember to use a rubber!

  1. Rondo says:
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    Would you trade Kelvin Benjamin for Dez Bryant in a 14-team league with .25PPR?

    • Jennifer

      JENNIFER WARNER says:
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      @Rondo: I am a Dez owner in several leagues and I am a little worried right now because his Week 1 performance was a little flacid. I have some concerns that he is not going to be able to perform without Romo. I may wait another week and I could be dropping him myself. I’d hold on to Benji for now and see what Week 2 brings us. Hopefully it was a fluke and some growing pains this past week, but Dez came pretty damn close to being a Quit it this week.

  2. RotoLance

    RotoLance says:
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    Jen, Help PLEEAAAASE!!!! Too early to drop Carlos Hyde or wait another week???????

    • Jennifer

      JENNIFER WARNER says:
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      @RotoLance: Ok, first of all, take a deep breath…second of all, why would you want to do that? Was 22 fantasy points not enough for your insatiable blood lust??? Ok, sure, this past week was a nice show for Hyde and ok, sure, he is not going to put up those kinds of numbers with Carolina this coming week, but the Niner’s are really going to have to rely on him this season if they want to win games. But come on, man, it’s only Week 1! I would possibly bench him this week for and RB who has a better shot at posting numbers for you becuase Hyde won’t this week, but dropping him so early? Nah, I’d wait.

      • goodfold2 says:
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        @JENNIFER WARNER: he’s referencing the douchebag who yelled at you last year when in about week 3 you told people to drop hyde (in certain cases, it wasn’t unqualified).

        • Jennifer

          Jennifer Warner says:
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          @goodfold2: Wow here we are a whole year later and people remember what I wrote in Week 3 of the 2015 season?? Damn, I am powerful!

          • RotoLance

            RotoLance says:
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            @Jennifer Warner: Yeah I was just messing around. But yes I’m reading other people’s stuff. And remembering it. Why not? It was memorable. Funny part is, I think everyone would have been better off if they had dropped Hyde after week 1 last year (and I’m pretty sure you wrote that after week 1, they played on Monday night last year two and that was his best game). That’s how little we are able to predict this stuff.

            Honestly it never occurred to me that you wouldn’t remember. My memory works a certain way, which others peoples do not though, something I can take for granted.

          • goodfold2 says:
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            @Jennifer Warner: it’s really only easy to remember since shortly after this you weren’t writing any more last year. had you been around the entire year last year it’s very likely i’d have had no idea when this occurred (would’ve remembered it was early in the year)

        • RotoLance

          RotoLance says:
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          @goodfold2: Yeah I figured someone would point this out. I didn’t want to, like I just told her I took it for granted that she would remember the inside reference I was making. My bad.

    • goodfold2 says:
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      @RotoLance: i remember this from last year (about week 3)

  3. Brian says:
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    I bought the Tyrod hype from Tehol now I am stuck in a sticky situation. My other options on waivers are Flaco Wentz Tannehill and Cutler. I am currently leaning Flaco due to his soft schedule but wondering what you would do ? Thanks for the advice and my advice to you us stay away from sticky situations unless your that kind of girl.

    • Jennifer

      JENNIFER WARNER says:
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      @Brian: You listened to Tehol??? Oh, you poor man! Haha! No, just kidding, Tehol knows his stuff but when he has a hard on for someone, well, let’s just say he isn’t thinking with the right head…like most men.

      Flacco is not a bad option since he does have a schedule softer than your grandfather’s penis. I have a feeling that this will be a bounce back year for Tanny. I’d steer clear of Cutler and Wentz. Go with your gut on this one. On the plus side, everyone has that one guy in their league who has no clue what’s going on, so you may be able to trade Tyrod away to some poor schlub.

    • Vito says:
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      I have Tyrod, too. Its’ only week 1. He’s a great duel-threat guy, plug him in the right match-ups, don’t drop him. I would grab Cutler since his SOS is ranked 7th on fantasypros…go look. Rank 1 = easiest. His remaining games are a joke! I am in the same dilemma. I will grab Cutler also.

  4. Coolwhip

    Todd25 says:
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    Do you like NYJ-Def vs BUF or BAL-Def vs CLE better this week? the jets 7 sacks last week were nice, but didn’t see the game. really good d or bad o-line?

    • Jennifer

      JENNIFER WARNER says:
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      @Todd25: Hmmm, that’s a toughie. Not giving me much to work with on this one. Well, since Cleveland is a shit show, I have a tendency to lean toward Baltimore-Cleveland, but I have a feeling (and I can’t believe I am about to say this) that the Jets D is the way to go this coming week.

      • Coolwhip

        Todd25 says:
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        @JENNIFER WARNER: like Will I Am, “I have a feeling” too… cue music.

        • Jennifer

          Jennifer Warner says:
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          @Todd25: I was thinking more REO Speedwagon but that’s just me. ;)

    • JeF WiTh 1 F says:
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      @Todd25: Go with the Jets…they had 7 sacks and didn’t even have Sheldon Richardson last week.

      • Jennifer

        JENNIFER WARNER says:
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        @JeF WiTh 1 F: That’s what I said. sheesh…

  5. William Hung says:
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    I was very lucky and made a sacrifice to the FFBL gods so my starters came out of Week 1 healthy. My bench was lackluster so I wanted to know if I should Keep It or Kick It on the following bench options:

    -Torrey Smith, Corey Coleman, Tyler Boyd, Matt Jones

    • Jennifer

      JENNIFER WARNER says:
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      @William Hung: Wow, lackluster is putting it mildly…sheesh…ok, let me see what magic I can work here….

      Torrey Smith has Carolina this coming week. Stock declining rapidly
      Corey Coleman has Baltimore and with RGIII being out, that is not looking too handsome either
      Tyler Boyd (this one is easy) drop him for a higher-ceiling waiver pick…take anyone. He has no re-draft value at this point
      Matt Jones is the only one worth a look in week 2 as a possible RB3. He also looks healthy and didn’t fumble last week, so that’s a plus too.

      Hope this helps! Yikes, this is worse than last call pickins when the lights come on. Go buy some beer goggles and hope that you can drink this mess away. ;)

      • William Hung says:
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        @JENNIFER WARNER: The good news is that these guys are on my bench so barring an injury, I can be a little patient. So you’d rank Torrey Smith ahead of these guys and my drop is Boyd for a guy like Eli Rogers or Victor Cruz?

        I play in a 12 team .5 PPR league so a lot of players sites are highlighting as pick ups are already drafted.

        • Jennifer

          JENNIFER WARNER says:
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          @William Hung: Well, Rogers has Cinnci this coming week and let me remind you, they allowed 54 yards and a TD to Enunwa this past week, so if you can snag him, go for it. Even when Wheaton returns, Rogers is still expected to play in 3-wide sets.

          Cruz worries me. You can’t come back from an injury like that and be the same as you were. I am afraid my Black Widow Curse may pick him off again soon. I think the safer play here is Rogers. But, yeah, quit it with Boyd. Rogers is only owned by like 8% in most leagues, so you may be able to grab him off waivers, depending on your wire priority. Be prepared that someone else may snag him.

          Not judging, we all have to go slumming sometimes. Good luck, love! ;)

          • William Hung says:
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            @JENNIFER WARNER: I own multiple properties in the slum – it’s how you win in 12 team leagues with 6 bench spots

            • Jennifer

              JENNIFER WARNER says:
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              @William Hung: Touche…

  6. Adam says:
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    Melvin Gordon or C Michael ROS?
    D Moncrief or Jordan Matthews ROS?

    • Jennifer

      JENNIFER WARNER says:
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      @Adam: Those are nice options to have. I’d go Gordon over Michael since Seattle seems to have an issue moving the ball and Gordon is looking to play a big part in the Chargers offense now that Keenan Allen has fallen prey to my Black Widow Curse.

      Jordan Matthews over Moncrief. He’s gonna see a lot of volume with Ertz being out with his rib issue, plus they have the Bears this week and we all know how that secondary operates….shitty.

      Hope this helps!

  7. Okteds says:
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    I’m in a 10-team keeper league (we keep 7).

    I’m looking at Snead, Fuller, and Sanu on our waiver wire.

    Of the droppable guys on my roster I have: Golden Tate, DeVante Parker, and Dwayne Allen filling in for Eifert

    I’m thinking of dropping Tate for Fuller, but are there any other suggestions?

    • Jennifer

      Jennifer Warner says:
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      @Okteds: Fuller is going to be a heavy free agent pick up this week. He is up against a team ranked 14th in receiving defense (KC)

  8. justin says:
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    i know the minnesota defense was amazing last week. but should i hold onto them for week 2 as well? or hit the wire for baltimore or the jets.

    • Jennifer

      Jennifer Warner says:
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      @justin: Minnesota has Green Bay this week and the Jets have Buffalo. I think it’s a no-brained here.

  9. Rondo says:
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    Reed or Snead in .25PPR?

    • Jennifer

      JENNIFER WARNER says:
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      @Rondo: Well, Reed has Dallas this week and they gave up the 5th fewest passing yards in the league last season, while Snead has the Giants who have up 505 passing yards to the Saints last season. I think that’s an easy call there.

  10. Rondo says:
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    Which side wins in a .5PPR?

    A) Moncrief
    B) Abdullah and Hogan

    Thanks.

    • Jennifer

      Jennifer Warner says:
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      @Rondo: I’d go Abdullah/Hogan. More bang for your buck.

  11. Frankgrimes says:
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    Tyrod Taylor sucks.
    You’re hot.

    • Jennifer

      Jennifer Warner says:
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      @Frankgrimes: Aww shucks…obviously you’re perceptions are quite astute.

  12. Pollock drop says:
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    Devonta owner here. Had him for $3 in a keeper league and hated that I felt obligated to keep him (I did) due to value…

    I somehow missed tevin as a handcuff as he went for like $12 and I didn’t foresee that happening. Obviously the guy was big on him (don’t blame hime). Should I do one of the following

    I own christine Michael, he owns Rawls. Should I offer Phillip rivers/c-mike/Dywane Allen for tevin Coleman/ Julius Thomas

    Or, should I offer freeman and Dwayne Allen for Thomas Rawls and Julius?

    I have guys like ivory/ Crowell/Forsett also on my team, willing to do just about any trade to get out of this Falcons mess

    Thanks

  13. M says:
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    Flex question, PPR
    Devonte Adams
    Eli Rodgers
    Tyler Lockett
    Tyrell Williams
    fwiw Arod is my QB

    • Jennifer

      JENNIFER WARNER says:
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      @M:
      Adams – He is clearly the Packers #3 receiver but I don’t see him on the WR4 radar
      Lockett – He still has some growing pains and I don’t fully trust him in LA this week, plus Wilson has an apparent ankle injury. Use caution here.
      Rogers – He is going to be a hot waiver wire pick up this week. He will still see some work when Wheaton comes back, so there is upside there.
      Williams – He is going to see a big increase in his workload with Keenan Allen out. May be a good chance to snag him if you can

      Hope this helps!

      • M says:
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        @JENNIFER WARNER: thanks
        I had Lockett already and was able to pick up all 3 of the others, will run Williams this week and see how the others pan out

        • Jennifer

          JENNIFER WARNER says:
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          @M: Good luck!

  14. Blaster says:
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    Lose Derrick Henry for Tevin Coleman?

    • Jennifer

      JENNIFER WARNER says:
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      @Blaster: I really like Coleman, but I would stick with Henry for now. Sure, he is playing second to Murray’s HBIC role, but I fully expect him to start eating into that workload soon. Coleman has the Raiders this coming week too and they allowed just 2 100-yard rushes last season but the 7th most receptions to running backs. See how Week 2 pans out with Henry then go from there.

      • Blaster says:
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        Ok. Will hope Demarco wrecks himself. Thanks

  15. Kris says:
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    Drop Sammy Watkins for either Travis Benjamin or Tyrell Williams? I do have Danny Woodhead and was able to pick up Snead and Fuller earlier today.

  16. Beef Jerky says:
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    12 team 1pt ppr

    My Hopkins and Ameer for his Dez, AP and Hyde.

    Thoughts

    Rest of the team
    Cuz
    l. Murray
    Moncrief
    Diggs
    J.Reed
    J. Charles
    Forsett
    T.west
    C.west

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