Training camp is now in full gear, and if you’ve watched any of Hard Knocks then you know the NFL is taking COVID-19 very seriously, allocating more resources to team health and safety than I allocate to searching the internet for shirtless pictures of my favorite players; that’s a lot of resources. And you also know that Jalen Ramsey is touring some very creepy L.A. homes and Sean McVay’s transformation into a Jon Gruden clone grows stronger by the day. But most importantly, how great does Austin Ekeler look without a shirt on?

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What if I told you that the most important part of fantasy sports isn’t the ranking process, but the drafting process? That team construction is more important than where Mike Evans lines up in the queue compared to D.J. Chark? Would you follow me into the boring world of team construction? 

I’m aiming this article at the average fantasy football that knows the game but wants to take that next step forward to improve their results. When entering a draft, you should be prepared to construct your roster in several different ways. However, there are better ways of constructing a roster than others. In a 12-team league, every manager starts with about an 8% chance of victory; by constructing your roster in a successful manner, you can increase your odds of victory upwards to 12%. That doesn’t seem like much, but when you’re talking money leagues, family pride, or being the talk of the socially-distanced work cafeteria, you should take every advantage you can get. 

In this article, I present the Robust RB strategy, which I think is the drafting method that returns the most consistent results. There are a ton of recent articles on Robust RB out there on the internet, but this article will be different by showing you some championship teams sourced from the NFFC. For example, Mike Beers deployed the robust RB strategy and was the winner of the RazzBowl in 2019. Looking at the 2019 Cutline Championships at the NFFC, almost all the winners used a Robust RB strategy. Let’s see what it can do for you!

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“I’m just here so I won’t get fined”, “I’m just ’bout that action boss” and “Yea”. Seattle Seahawks fans know these famous quotes very well; they are from fan favorite Marshawn Lynch. To this day I still use “I’m just here so I won’t get fined” when I’m stuck going somewhere I don’t want to be (like the time my wife dragged me to look at wedding invitations on a football Sunday!). It comes as no surprise, that when Marshawn was asked after the Seahawks’ wildcard win last season about the performance of his rookie teammate DK Metcalf, he had another “Lynch-ism” to share with the media. When asked what impresses him most about DK Metcalf, Lynch responded with “That he a big ass dude who can move like that”. Classic Beast Mode! 

If you remember back to last year’s off season, there was a ton of buzz at the NFL combine about Ole Miss wide receiver DK Metcalf. All the social media buzz was shirtless pictures showing what a massive human being he was, not only being completely JACKED, but having abs that the Sigma Alpha Epsilon bros could crush beer cans on! At 6’3″ and 230 lbs, this Goliath of a human, who was built like a linebacker instead of a wide receiver, went out there and ran a 4.33 40-yard dash, displayed a 40.5 inch vertical and did 27 reps on the bench press – the most reps by a wide receiver since Greg Little did 27 back in 2011! The NFL Network was comparing this man to Batman – a superhero!

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[the following is my pitch for Razzball’s retro sci-fi themed magazine, RAZZBOT

The hallways at Razzball corporate headquarters echoed with the sound of piped-in crowd noise, tuned to the Cleveland Browns channel. The angry barks of Ohioans chanting “BAKER MAKER FAKER SHAKER” showed that the noise generator bot had again glitched, stuck in rhyming mode. This pleased Razzball CEO Donkey Chompers, who was the cyborg iteration of his predecessor, Donkey Teeth.

Following the events of 2020, when Kahale Warring scored 18 receiving touchdowns, the Razzball analysts who had drafted him became world-wide celebrities renowned for their prognostication powers. Most of the Razzball analysts decided a career change was in order. BDon, Coach JB, and EverywhereBlair formed a boy band, The Razzbois. Rudy Gamble started a haberdashery for dogs. MB took up a career as Ben Rothlisberger’s stunt double. But Donkey Teeth wanted to become something…more. Having taken $25 off his NFFC best ball tournament by using the code “RAZZAUG,” he saved enough money to hire a high school robotics team and purchase their cheapest cybernetic augmentation: robot teeth. With his dental hygiene automated, Donkey Chompers had enough free time to devote to his new life goal: finding the next Kahale Warring. 

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2020 Shadow Coverage Report

Miami Dolphins

Division: AFC EAST

WR1: Devante Parker

Number of Potential Shadow Coverage Match-ups: 8

Historical Production

DeVante Parker vs. Shadow Coverage in 2019
Opponent Games PPG
Vs. Shadow Coverage
4 13.6
All other opponents
12 13.0

DeVante Parker was nothing short of amazing in 2019 as his career year came at a fantastic time aka his contract year. Now after a big pay day Parker needs to show that 2019 was no fluke. Last season down the stretch Parker beat up on some notable corners including Tre’Davious White (7-135), William Jackson (5-111) and Defensive Player of the Year Stephon Gilmore (8-137). Granted during that time Parker was the only show in town as he averaged 12 targets in those games which is an unsustainable 16 game pace of 192. All in all, it was still impressive none the less.

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The world can be completely upside down and our lives can be changed forever, but some things will always be there to comfort you. As long as we have internet at least. That’s right, RCLs are back for the 2020 season! If Roger says there is going to be football, then let there be fantasy! There is more at stake than ever before. Oh you already read that in the title? Sorry. The journey to #RazzBowl3 starts right here for the top finishers and for those of you that like to put your money where your mouth is, we will be offering cash leagues as well. Here are the details…

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As we prepare for the 2020 season, there are tons of hot takes swirling around the internet. Some are baseless tweets and articles meant to stir up conversation and clicks. Others are bold predictions that do have some foundation in reality, even if it’s a long shot. I plan to make this article somewhere in the middle. 

Football is set up for small samples with only 16 games in a season and roughly 55-65 offensive snaps per game. In football, even a player with “a lot” of volume may only participate in a fantasy relevant play on 20 of those snaps. Contrast that with baseball where each hitter on a team sees 600 at bats in a season! 

For this exercise I will highlight a player or situation on each team in the NFL using a nugget from 2019. You need to decide for yourself whether the information should dictate your position or whether it’s just a fun statistical oddity chalked up to sampling bias.

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The innovation machine never stops here at Razzball. Except for that one time when I tried to use it to heat up some leftover pizza. What a disaster that was! In the modern world of pandemics, riots and keto diets, we know it can be hard to find time to listen to 30-60 minute fantasy football shows. Oh, there’s a squirrel! Sorry, what was I talking about? Right, we’ve created a short-form video series for those of us with the attention span of a puppy. On Donkey’s Advocate, I’ll be bringing on many of the top fantasy football industry experts to sell me on one of their favorite 2020 fantasy football draft targets while I play devil’s donkey’s advocate. All of this will take place in a two minute rapid fire segment. In this week’s batch I was joined by Jake Ciely, Scott Engel and Bob Lung to discuss T.J. Hockenson, D.K. Metcalf and Raheem Mostert:

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Polarizing players do not lack reasons for the general public to despise their successes. However, if you need another angle to take out your envy on Tom Brady from, look no further. His new team, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, is nicknamed after 17th century free sailors of the Caribbean. Those first Buccaneers were named from a Spanish-Caribbean word meaning smoker of meat. The meat these early landless hunters smoked were manatees! Yes, those cute herbivorous mammals beloved by aquarium goers globally. Tom Brady is basically a manatee murderer!

Tampa Bay finished 7-9 on the 2019 campaign, missing the NFL playoffs for the 12th consecutive year. It was disappointing to Bucs fans everywhere with seeming talent at all positions that they could not find a way to secure more wins. Despite the poor overall record, there were some signs of pending improvement on the defensive side of the ball. In 2018, that unit was the worst in the NFL, scoring 14.8 percent in defensive DVOA. Last season, Tampa Bay was the best defense against the run (3.3 yards per carry against) and turned over the opposition 28 times (5th most). All of that effort brought them up to -11.5 percent defensive DVOA, placing the defense fifth overall.

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With B_Don on vacation, Darik Buchar—the hidden hand of the RazzBowl and the NFFC’s jack of all trades—jumps on with Donkey Teeth to chat about some fantasy football news and notes. But first he shares a top secret NFFC promo code for $25 off any NFFC contest. Alright, it’s not a secret, it’s “RAZZAUG.”

In the news segment, Miles Sanders gets hyped, then injured, but then it sounds like he’s fine; the Patriots may use a QB committee, huh?; and Dalvin Cook cuts off extension talks with the Vikings.

Later the guy’s take a look at a handful of players who went higher and lower in RazzBowl drafts compared to consensus ADP. Find all RazzBowl ADP information over at the NFFC.

Darik and Donkey wrap the show up with a little analysis on each other’s 2020 RazzBowl drafts. Don’t forget to head over to the NFFC and take advantage of the exclusive Razzball $25 off promo code: RAZZAUG.

Good luck!

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I’m no longer a baby, at least technically speaking, but I do enjoy the soothing relief of a baby wipe from time to time. I’m not sure if you spend as much time pondering the baby wipe market as I do, probably not. But I’ve determined that in a bind, a package of Pampers would be worth upwards of $500 to me. And while a package of  those sensual wipes might be valued at $500 in my mind, I’m not going around offering up $500 when they’re available on Amazon for $4.99. Such is the case with all of my 2020 fantasy football rankings which I’ve slaved over tirelessly for your reading and mocking pleasure over the past three months while locked in my cage at Razzball Headquarters, far away from the echo chamber. What I mean is, just because I have Austin Ekeler and Kerryon Johnson ranked absurdly high, doesn’t mean I’m drafting them in the 1st and 5th rounds respectively. If the market wants to give me those sweet moisture filled wipes for 10 cents on the dollar, or Ekeler in the 2nd round or Kerryon in the 9th round, who am I to argue? I’ve written slightly more in depth and nonsensical thoughts about all of these players as I worked thru my 2020 fantasy football positional rankings, take a look back if you’re interested in more gibberish. Anyway, here’s the top 100 for 2020 PPR fantasy football:

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The Miles Sanders hype train has lost the brakes and is full speed ahead going into the 2020 season. But the train seems to be staying on the tracks after Doug Pederson told Miles Sanders, “You’re the guy this season.” Coach speak should be taken with a grain of salt, but this is exactly what Miles Sanders truthers like myself want to hear. The hype is so rampant that if you Google “Miles Sanders shirtless” the 2nd picture in the results is actually Saquon Barkley shirtless. I mean, if Google is confusing Miles Sanders and Saquon Barkley in August, imagine what Sanders will do for his investors during the season.

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