As Tom Brady has taught us, quarterback is a position where measurable physical traits matter the least. Arm strength is nice, but ask Jamarcus Russell how much it helped him. Rushing ability is a plus but in most cases needs to be secondary to the arm. The most important thing is decision making and quick processing, which is pretty difficult to quantify on paper.

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Quarantine Day 32: 

This virus is really throwing a wrench in our economy as well as our professional sports enjoyment. Have you seen the latest proposal for the 2020 Major League Baseball season? I’m not talking about that whole Arizona/Florida restructured league proposal with the 30-team playoff. The latest idea on the table is one where Elon Musk and Richard Branson fly all the baseball teams to the moon where they’ll play the entire season without gravity. Even Tim Tebow with be launching dingers into orbit.  This is especially exciting because if all goes well, rumor has it the NFL season will be played on Mars. In anticipation, Bill O’Brien just traded Deshaun Watson for a cardboard cutout of Buzz Lightyear. Anyway, I went over my top 15 dynasty tight ends last week, here’s my top 30 tight ends for 2020 PPR dynasty football: 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Quarantine Day 31:

 I sneezed yesterday and my girlfriend (still imaginary) kicked me out of our virus bunker. I’m now writing this from the back yard where I’m sheltering in place under my handmade wigwam shelter. Finally all of those episodes of Naked and Afraid are paying off. I’m not afraid out here but I am very naked. Hope the neighbors don’t mind. Actually, as a Bears fan I’m beyond afraid of our quarterback situation. Remember when the Bears drafted Trubisky over Mahomes and Watson? You do? Damn, was hoping that was just a bad dream! Anyway, here’s my top 40 quarterbacks for 2020 dynasty football: 

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Bill O’Brien has done it again, my friends! The Houston Texans have traded the 57th overall pick in the 2020 NFL Draft to the Los Angeles Rams for Brandin Cooks. When Bill O’Brien inevitably gets banished from the NFL for completely gutting the Texans organization of it’s assets, I hope he doesn’t dip his toes into the financial realm. If he does, promise me that you won’t let him manage your portfolio. The economy is hectic enough as it is in these trying times.

Let’s break this down, shall we? The Texans were coming into the draft with 3 picks in the top 57. This draft holds one of the deepest wide receiver classes in recent memory. After trading DeAndre Hopkins, the top receivers on the Houston roster were Kenny Stills and Will Fuller. 

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Henry Ruggs III – University of Alabama – 5’11” 188 lbs. – January 24, 1999 (21 years old)

SPEED, and not with Keanu. Ruggs can absolutely fly. Lace up his PF Flyers and let’s go baby! Ain’t no Dawgs catching him.
Absolutely a terror when he is working short crosses and slants. Anything that allows him to pull away and get into open space.
Does a good job working parallel or back to the QB when working on the intermediate or deeper crosses.
Breaks aren’t overly sharp on slants. Can get delayed in his route trying to shake defender at the line.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Quarantine Day 28:

My life has been reduced to friends asking me if I’ve seen a T.V. show and me telling them, “No, I haven’t seen that show.” Then they tell me I should see that show and I say, “I’ll add it to the list.” But there is no list and I won’t watch that show. Because I’ll forget since I don’t have a list. What a paradox! But if I somehow remember to watch that show, there better not be any surprise subtitles. If you’re recommending a show that has subtitles, etiquette dictates that you disclose this subtitle stipulation in your recommendation. Don’t be a heathen! People need to mentally prepare for what they’re getting into. Like right now I’m about to share some 2020 dynasty football rankings with you, so I’ll forewarn, there’s reading involved and there’s no audio book available just yet. Hopefully you’ll still stick around for my top 80 wide receivers for 2020 PPR dynasty football:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Quarantine Day 27:

Hey all you cool cats and kittens. Did you see the story about the tiger at the Bronx Zoo that tested positive for coronavirus? Very sad. I blame Carole Baskin. Not just for the infection of this poor feline, but for the entire COVID debacle. Speaking of which, the CDC just released some new guidelines and in order to receive a COVID-19 test in the United States you must now meet at least one of these requirements:

     a) Politician

     b) Professional athlete (Major League Soccer doesn’t count)

     c) Movie star (Porn does count)

     d) Valued tiger at the zoo

And if you check all four boxes the CDC even throws in a free roll of TP. So far only one man has cashed in on that free roll of one-ply: my preferred 2020 presidential candidate, Darren Waller. Anyway, here’s my top 15 dynasty tight ends for 2020 fantasy football:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Tuesday was the big unveiling of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers’ new uniforms officially wiping the slate clean before the Tom Brady era, or whatever. I’ll give Tampa credit, these look like actual NFL uniforms as opposed to the knockoff XFL jerseys that they had been rocking for the past few years. I suppose that you could say that these new uniforms have a similar feel to golden era of Tampa Bay football in the late 90’s and early 00’s. The new uniforms are not that original though. They look like a hybrid of the Houston Texans’ and the Atlanta Falcons’ jerseys. 

I don’t think that the uniforms are the only similarity that there will be with the Bucs and Falcons this year. In fact, I think the Falcons could have a breakout receiver similar to what the Bucs had with Chris Godwin. And that receiver is none other than Calvin Ridley. 

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While we are all cooped up, I thought it would be a fun idea to get some of the awesome fantasy football writers I’ve met this past season in a league with a few of my choice competitors from home leagues. The basics of the league are: 12 team, superflex, PPR format with a few additional scoring wrinkles such as a quarter point-per-first-down, TE premium, some yardage bonuses and a little negative for QB sacks. Senior editor Razzball_MB wrote a nice review of the pro draft in an article earlier this week. SPOILER: He likes my team in year 1. DOUBLE SPOILER: We may not have a year 1… but, I digress.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Quarantine Day 25:

I made a fire in the yard today while pondering my 2020 dynasty rankings. As I gazed into the flames, a series of vivid images began to appear. The Lord of Light was sending me a divine message about dynasty quarterbacks. Or maybe the mushrooms I had eaten were starting to kick in, hard to say. Either way, a life-size image of Kyler Murray arose from the blazing inferno. The meaning was clear, this dull and uneventful 20th year after 2000 will forever be know as the year of Kyler, and nothing else. Anyway, here’s my top 20 dynasty quarterbacks for 2020 fantasy football:   

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Weeks or months of boredom can make a person do crazy things. These crazy things can include making a commitment that could easy last a half of a decade or more. Hey, it’s a good way to abstain from making a commitment that could last 18 years by making a quarantine baby. It’s all about give and take. And trust me, there is no bigger turnoff to your quarantine partner than doing a slow dynasty draft in late March and early April when kick off is still 5 months away. So it seems that 12 of us chose wisely by participating in the Quarantine Invitational. 

This league was put together by Razzball’s own  Al_FF_red (you probably know him as Boof). He reached out to 5 other writers that he is fans of or friends with to participate. This group makes up the Touts division. There is also the Doubts division. This division is made up of Boof’s pals who he probably refers to as fans. The Doubts division is made up of some sharp drafters who are also some pretty funny dudes, so there will be no discounting of their intelligence. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?