Alright everyone, it’s a hectic week with the holidays, so I could only find time to get you the rankings with no write ups this week. Apologies, and the write ups will be back next week. In lieu of write ups, here’s another big stat sheet including upcoming schedules and the points allowed vs TE.

Stuffing

Rank Players Season Last 5 Last 3  
Prev Rank Rank Name Team G PPR Rec Yds TD PPR/GM PPR PPR ROS Rank vs TE
1 1 Travis Kelce KC 10 195.8 66.0 896.0 7 19.6 83.8 52.8 11

Stuffing is awesome. It’s elite and you only get it once or twice a year. 

 

Mac and Cheese

Rank Players Season Last 5 Last 3 Schedule
Prev Rank Rank Name Team G PPR Rec Yds TD PPR/GM PPR PPR ROS Rank vs TE
2 2 Darren Waller LV 10 139.9 60 519 5 14.0 66.4 41.7 13
3 3 T.J. Hockenson DET 10 116.1 40 441 5 11.6 59.4 29 17

By itself, mac and cheese deserves the #1 spot, but it’s available all year, which lessens the Thanksgiving ranking.

 

Mashed Potatoes

Rank Players Season Last 5 Last 3 Schedule
Prev Rank Rank Name Team G PPR Rec Yds TD PPR/GM PPR PPR ROS Rank vs TE
4 4 Hayden Hurst ATL 10 96.1 37 411 3 9.6 36.4 13.2 9
5 5 Rob Gronkowski TB 11 94.9 31 399 4 8.6 50.1 18.8 20
6 6 Evan Engram NYG 10 86.8 38 347 2 8.7 42.2 19.3 16
11 7 Eric Ebron PIT 10 92.9 35 359 4 9.3 56.4 30.6 5
9 8 Mark Andrews BAL 10 119.4 38 454 6 11.9 45.1 38.9 18

Similar to mac and cheese, who doesn’t love mashed potatoes, but they’re just mashed potatoes. Cover ’em with gravy for Thanksgiving plus the little mashup (pun intended) where they get next to everything. A little mashed potatoes with corn, with turkey, with stuffing, it’s all good. 

Pie (Apple With Ice Cream For Me)

Rank Players Season Last 5 Last 3 Schedule
Prev Rank Rank Name Team G PPR Rec Yds TD PPR/GM PPR PPR ROS Rank vs TE
10 9 Logan Thomas WSH 10 79 30 308 3 7.9 35.2 19.2 28
8 10 Noah Fant DEN 9 95.2 39 422 2 10.6 40.3 21.8 2
15 11 Dallas Goedert PHI 6 61.3 23 263 2 10.2 28.5 26 30
14 12 Hunter Henry LAC 10 102.5 41 435 3 10.3 47.7 35.1 12
12 13 Jonnu Smith TEN 10 111.9 30 338 8 11.2 39.5 32.7 23

I’m not sure these players are really worth of a dessert ranking, but I don’t look forward to dessert on Thanksgiving like some people do. I’m already too full by that point to consider eating any more. Talk to me after the late game wraps up, or maybe next week. 

 

Turkey

Rank Players Season Last 5 Last 3 Schedule
Prev Rank Rank Name Team G PPR Rec Yds TD PPR/GM PPR PPR ROS Rank vs TE
13 14 Robert Tonyan GB 10 107.1 32 391 6 10.7 41.3 23.2 3
16 15 Jimmy Graham CHI 10 95.2 35 302 5 9.5 28.9 17.5 25
20 16 Dalton Schultz DAL 10 95.8 39 408 3 9.6 36.8 21.3 10
18 17 Zach Ertz PHI 6 49.8 24 178 1 8.3 #N/A #N/A 30
22 18 Mike Gesicki MIA 10 81.4 28 414 2 8.1 23.3 21.5 19
17 18 Austin Hooper CLE 8 56.9 26 249 1 7.1 8.4 8.4 6
21 19 Jordan Reed SF 5 44 17 150 2 8.8 12.5 12.5 14
7 19 Jared Cook NO 9 72.5 22 285 4 8.1 32.9 4.6 7

Just like tight ends, yes, you HAVE to make a turkey. I like turkey, but there are so many bad ones put on tables this time of year. I admit, as somebody who cooks, turkeys are a bit hit and miss (just like this group of TEs). It’s not like we carry a backup (turkey or TE) and by the time it’s ruined, it’s too late. Worst case, cover it in gravy and eat a slice because you don’t want the significant other’s mom mad at you while you’re trapped in her house.

 

Green Bean Casserole

Rank Players Season Last 5 Last 3 Schedule
Prev Rank Rank Name Team G PPR Rec Yds TD PPR/GM PPR PPR ROS Rank vs TE
19 20 Gerald Everett LAR 10 64.4 26 282 2 6.4 32.4 11.4 32
21 21 Mo Alie-Cox IND 9 62.9 22 309 2 7.0 20.5 13.8 22
22 22 Tyler Higbee LAR 9 78.6 27 315 3 8.7 18.4 15 32
23 23 Trey Burton IND 7 61.4 20 171 4 8.8 27.6 17.5 22
24 24 Irv Smith Jr. MIN 9 47.2 15 182 2 5.2 21.9 19.3 1

I like green bean casserole personally, but it’s a side that gets mixed reviews. A trained monkey could make it and you always end up waiting on it because the turkey is taking all the space in the oven. 

 

Cranberry Sauce

Rank Players Season Last 5 Last 3 Schedule
Prev Rank Rank Name Team G PPR Rec Yds TD PPR/GM PPR PPR ROS Rank vs TE
25 25 Dan Arnold ARI 10 43.8 17 208 1 4.4 25.1 17.4 26
26 26 Cameron Brate TB 11 42.7 16 147 2 3.9 24.7 17.4 20
27 27 Jack Doyle IND 8 37.4 10 114 3 4.7 17.4 7.6 22
26 28 Anthony Firkser TEN 10 63.2 29 282 1 6.3 22 13.7 23
28 29 Richard Rodgers PHI 10 56.2 21 292 1 5.6 37.3 22.8 30
  30 Tyler Kroft BUF 9 41.9 12 119 3 4.7 19.6 7.1 31
32 31 Kyle Rudolph MIN 10 51.6 21 266 1 5.2 23.3 21.1 1
35 32 Jordan Akins HOU 7 55.5 22 275 1 7.9 18.7 18.7 24
34 33 Tyler Eifert JAC 9 43.8 19 188 1 4.9 17.5 17.5 #N/A

When the product is best out of a can, in a jello mold with the visible can rings around it, it’s not my thing. Where’s that dessert at? 

  1. toolshed says:
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    Goedert had a good game last week, do you expect that trend and his rise to continue with ertz getting close. Surprisingly Rogers is being used more than I expected. Wentz and the eagles offense has taken a step back after I thought they’d get better. Ertz is still on ir, do you think he is going to be factor when he returns; I didn’t expect him to be elite this year but I also didn’t expect him to be as ineffective as he was pre injury. Thx

    • The Harrow says:
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      he either got old quick or was playing injured before he got IR’d is the general consensus. we’ll be able to tell likely when he comes off though (assuming he doesn’t immediately hurt again when he’s back). dick rod goes back i’d assume to the almost no snaps he had last time ertz/goedert were both healthy at the same time.

    • B_Don

      B_Don says:
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      I expect Goedert to build off his efforts last week. Rodgers is being used as the Eagles run a good amount of 2 TE sets. Ertz could be back next week, so, I expect that is the end of the Dick Rod run. I have Ertz as a wait and see upside play for the playoffs, but he didn’t look like the Ertz we knew even before injury so it’s really only if you have the extra roster space.

  2. William Hung says:
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    Can’t rank Hurst so high after a donut – someone that high needs to have a safe enough floor to not post 0 points

    • B_Don

      B_Don says:
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      Every player, and especially every TE, can post up a donut. Looking at the recent trends, plus Julio being out this week, didn’t want to punish Hurst for one dud.

  3. Hamtime says:
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    picked up hinton because of the insane denver QB situation. are you playing him at flex over jakobi? julio is on my bench bec of uncertainty

  4. B_Don

    B_Don says:
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    No, I’d probably roll with Jakobi.

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