Greetings! After witnessing Peyton the redeemer, AKA Peyton the Elder, DECIMATE the once proud hearts of Kansas City Chiefs fans, I have two questions for you fine people: 1) Can we now put a stop to doubting Manning in the regular season? The old geezer may live off of Papa John’s and Chicken Parm, but on Thursday Night Football, he served nothing but grizzly tube-steak, force feeding the veiny meat down the throats of the Chiefs secondary. And 2) Are we going to stop complaining about the quality of TNF games? The battle started out limper than Stephen Baldwin’s career, but when that whistle blew, I find it difficult to believe ANY of you were questioning the quality of entertainment you just witnessed. Yes, I was once a detractor of TNF games, but with the inclusion of many more inter-divisional games and the upgraded ability for teams to prepare on a short week, going back to last season, it’s actually been quite solid. Enough of tonguing Peyton’s taint, though I know many of you would like to dive further into the discussion, the purpose of this post is to inform you of my most inner thoughts and dark secrets regarding Sunday and Monday’s games.

I am Tehol Beddict, and this is Start ‘Em and Sit ‘Em! Take heed!

You can check out my rankings here, for all your roster needs.

 

Start ‘Em

Johnny Manziel – No, I’m not going to hit you with some lame, “Heeeeeere’s Johnny” line, though I obviously desired to do so. What I’m going to do is let you know that though the Titans finished 2015 15th in passing defense and they were 31st in run defense. And what, my goodmen, does Johnny Heisman excel at? Other than putting Merril Hoge in his place for wearing those despicable fat ties? It would be escaping the pocket and getting up the field. Johnny come lately had 35-yards rushing in Week 1, with another 30 or so yards taken away by penalties. Look, I believe Dick LeBeau is going to blitz the shizz out of him, but barring injury, Manziel is not leaving this game, so the stats SHOULD be there in the end. If you’re desperate, get him in there! Say one thing for Merril Hoge, he’s a tool of the highest order.

Joe Flacco – I live by two rules: Pipe anything that moves… and most of the time, I like starting quarterbacks who are playing against the Oakland Raiders, especially when their secondary is more decimated than Richard Gere’s rectum after a gerbil session. Seriously, the Raiders already impuissant defensive backfield is already down Nate Allen and team leader Charles Woodson. Even with Baltimore’s lack of wide receiver talent, Flacco should do enough work to end up with solid numbers. I’m hoping so anyway, for else, I’ll look bad and that’s unacceptable.

Tevin Coleman – The Giants were 30th against the run last year, and with somehow even less talent on the defensive side of the ball in 2015, I expect Coleman to have a very scrumptious outing. On half of his runs against Philadelphia, Coleman looked like he was inches away from busting the money shot and he’s clearly a far superior runner than Devonta Freeman. Man, Coleman looks good. If my eye for talent hasn’t disappeared, I’d say this guy has a solid chance of becoming a full blown star.

Dion Lewis – Good Gods, I feel disgusting for even writing about a Patriot in my column, but the fact of the matter is, that I expect MY Buffalo Bills to clamp down on Gronk and Edelman, forcing Brady to attempt more dump-offs than a Mexican drug mule. Look, I’m not here to tell you to start Adrian Peterson or not. I’m here to give you some under the radar plays for the flex or deeper leagues, and in this case, your PPR leagues. Also, don’t ever mention again that I wrote about a New England Patriot. I didn’t want it to come to this.

Anquan Boldin – Rich Homie Quan only had four receptions for 36 yards in Week 1, then again, he wasn’t going against a secondary that couldn’t start at the University of Alabama, let alone the NFL. I fully expect Kaepernick to make it rain on the copper curtain, allowing Boldin to have the kind of day the Elder Gods told me over a heavy peyote smoke sesh would occur. It has been written.

Sammy Watkins – Everyone is down on my boy, I am Sam, and that’s not cool. It’s not cool at all. Vontae Davis, one of the five best defensive backs in the league, was draped on Watkins last week, and when you couple that with the fact that the Bills threw the ball three times total in the second half… you have your explanation. The Patriots simply have nobody in their secondary that can cover this freak show, and I plan on him hitting pay dirt.

Crockett Gillmore I believe I mentioned Crockett last week… or was I discussing the actress from the hit WB show Gillmore Girls that I had a torrid affair with in 2003? Either way, I love Gillmore this week if you’re in a deep league or playing DFS. As I mentioned earlier, the Raiders secondary has more penetrable holes in it than the entire Kardashian family put together. Gillmore was THIS close to catching a game winning touchdown against Denver last week and you witnessed what Eifert did to Oakland, so this is a no brainer.

St. Louis Rams – This has all the makings of a bludgeoning of historic proportions. Mix the Rams destructive pass rush with the impotent Kirk Cousins and his tendency to throw a minimum of two picks a game, and we could have a full on disaster on our hands folks. Pay whatever is necessary for them.

 

Sit ‘Em

Ryan Tannehill – I feel like I’m the only Tanny hater on the planet, and guys/gals, sometimes it’s no fun being alone… unless your significant other is out of town anyway. Then you can watch porn with the volume all the way up! Or even plug the USB into the TV and watch it on the big screen! Have at it! Anyways, the Jags defense is DECENT, therefore I don’t expect anything more than 250 yards and one TD from Tannehill. What has this guy done to deserve the praise he gets? Lead a few teams to 8-8 records with NO DEEP BALL ABLITY? Like, I enjoy watching the young man’s athleticism, but he seems only capable of throwing 10 yard passes. Yippeeeeee. Maybe run Lamar Miller more than five times a game. The offensive coordinator, Bill Lazor, is running a total clown show in Miami and I look for the entire staff to be fired WHEN (not if) they miss the playoffs. You’ve got to be realistic about these things.

Marcus Mariota – Cleveland was 8th in passing defense last season, and they’re coming into a must win home opener. Yes, I said it, MUST WIN! Everyone’s job is on the line in Cleveland, so they should pull out all the stops on defense Sunday. The Elders have cautioned me in praising Mariota, telling me to take into account that Lovie Smith is a hapless has-been and the Bucs defense is devoid of any real talent overall talent. So don’t get cray and start Mariota over Peyton Manning or something… ohhh, too late? I feel for you, I truly do.

Chris Johnson Look, the Bears defense is trailer trash, but let’s not forget the fact that over the past four seasons, CJ2k has been about as noteworthy as Christian Slater’s acting career. If you didn’t get my point, it means that Johnson has no talent and should have retired years ago. Now, I expect him get 3-4 yards a carry and all that, but I’m assuming the Cardinals throw the ball even more than usual on Sunday. Stay away unless you’re truly desperate. Desperate like Slater is for work.

Amir Abdullah – It’s official, the hype train is officially out of control for Abdullah. I will get on my knees and suck the grime off each and every one of your toes if Abdullah hits pay dirt on Sunday. Joique Bell needs to get his fat ass in shape and start leading the team in carries every week as he should. Abdullah is VERY sexy change of pace back, but I like the Vikings defense to put the clamps on him in Week 2.

Nelson Agholor – Not sure if you witnessed the Falcons/Eagles game, but if you did, then you know Agholor looked like rhino dung, and hopefully Chip Kelly punished him accordingly. But seriously, the rookie looked awful in Week 1, which was surprising when considering he seemed the most ready to go receiver from this draft class other than Amari Cooper. Extremely disappointing and I’d stay away until he proves his worth.

James Jones – Soooooo, dude has a couple scores and everyone jumps on the bandwagon? My goodmen, we’ve seen this tale before! Only when Jones was a younger man and a better player. Look, I’ve always been the biggest James supporter this is, but with this offense, we literally have no clue who is going to have the nice week. We still have Cobb, Davante Adams, and Richard Rogers. So unless you believe the Packers are going to either blow out the Seahawks (please, Elder Gods, NO!), or hit Jones one of the few touchdowns they actually score, I’d stay away.

Larry Donnell Let me know when he passes Daniel Fells on the depth chart, aaaaaahkay?

Seattle Seahawks – Seattle’s defense always has the ability to go off, but with an Aaron Rodgers who rarely throws picks, I highly doubt this is their week to do so. Now, the Packers offensive line is pretty banged up so I suppose there is the chance for some sack fumbles, but you got to stream here, playas.

 

Thank you for joining me for another edition of Start’ em Sit’ em. As per usual your comments and questions can and will be responded to below. I’m here for you, my sons and daughters. Together, we shall taste sweet victory. Best of luck.

 

 

Want more Beddict? Follow him on Twitter at @Beddict143.

  1. Barker says:
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    Who to drop for a kicker

    Agholor or seferian jenkins or ryan mathews (handcuff to murray)

    Rbs murray gore coleman blount mathews
    Wr cooks garcon adams dez a robinson agholor
    Ts olsen ASJ

    This is some of your best work sir truly elder god blessed

    • Barker says:
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      @Barker: 10 team qb flex so only need to start two rbs

      • Tehol Beddict says:
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        @Barker: I meeeeeeean, you could drop Matthews but if Murray gets banged up you will deeply regret it

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Barker: Benjamin!!!! My dear boy!!!!! wow, this is ridiculous call here as you dont want to be dropping any of these dudes. but i guess you have to dump ASJ since you wont be starting him barring injury or you can trade him. other guys cant be dropped yet

  2. Comatose says:
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    Asked this in a previous post, but I need Tehol’s Hot Take: Is Christine Michael worth hanging onto in my last bench spot for the off chance he becomes the horse in Dallas?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Comatose: Certainly, unless you have an emergency and need to start someone like right now. Michael is more talented than anyone they have but then again he couldn’t even surpass Turbin and become the number 2 back in Seattle so I have my concerns. I just think he’s worth holding on to because if he gets carries he will produce. HEAVILY

  3. Wide Right says:
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    So I have questions for my
    WR2: Tate, Watkins, or Andre Johnson.
    TE: Rudolph or Sef-Jenkins
    and then the FLEX between the rest of those guys..(we can have a tight end as a FLEX)

    Thanks.

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Wide Right: i have Tate ranked the highest because I expect Revis on Johnson making him useless. now, If T.Y. plays that could change a bit but not greatly. I like Watkins upside but Tate is the safest play.

      • Wide Right says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: It’s a PPR League.. you like a TE at FLEX.. or should I take a chance with Sammy at the Flex?

  4. stlshawgo says:
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    I partially share your Tannehill hatred, but I’m ashamed to say he may be my best option this week.

    Would you start Cam Newton (HOU) or Marcus Mariota (@CLE) over Tannehill (@JAX) this week?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @stlshawgo: ughhhhh, probably not. Looks like you’re forced to throw him in there. he has decent weapons so hopefully they make some plays after the catch for him. i would go tannehill but theres chance for Newton to have under the radar nice game.

  5. Dub. says:
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    I was going to ask about Seattle, good analysis. I have Tennesse’s defense, the Ain’ts are available and so is Detroit, Browns, Steeelers, Colts…I don’t know who to start at defense over my Seahawks…advice? Thanks!

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Dub.: I think you have to go Titans here Dub! just because I like Manziel to have DECENT fantasy numbers doesnt mean he wont throw a pick 6 or get sacked a bunch of times. have to go Titans. its a great matchup for them

  6. superfly says:
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    Good Morning M. Beddict, PPR flex….E. Royal, A Robinson, K. Williams or F. Gore??? Thanks Sir.

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @superfly: whaddup Flyboy! extremely tough call here. Id probably still go Robinson, even after weak ass week 1 but you can go Gore to play it safe. royal is also safer than Robinson but with less upside. Gore is safest tho. good to hear from you

  7. Ted says:
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    Howdy man .5 PPR

    Question mark on my roster comes from TE. My starting TE is none other than Richard Rodgers.

    – Rich rod faces the Seahawks (minus chancellor) in GB & I’ve noticed the Seahawks give up fantasy points to the TE position.

    Roll w/ Rich Rodgers for this week & if he does good then good if not then to the wire, or just dump him anyways for any of these.

    — Crocket Gilmore (@ OAK)

    — Fleener (vs jets/ if Hilton doesn’t play)

    — Vernon Davis (@ Pitt)

    Thanks man!

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Ted: what it do what it is! I kind of like Rogers this week, for the reasons that you mentioned him and may be starting him myself. I really like Vernon Davis against Pittsburgh tho. I would consider going there unless you want to see how Rogers does. i have a feeling he gets td but I’ve been wrong before

  8. Shookonespart2 says:
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    What side of Sammy Watkins/Lamar miller for Alfred Morris/ asj/ Karlos Williams Ya got?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Shookonespart2: Watkins/Miller no hesitation.

      I got you stuck off the realness, we be the infamous
      You heard of us
      Official Queensbridge murderers

  9. Gio says:
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    Brandon Coleman worth a pickup in 10 team half PPR now that he has been promoted to #2WR?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Gio: hell yes. kind of a fantasy wr3 this week, but great chance at a score

  10. Dom B says:
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    Should I trade Legartte blount for Todd Gurley

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Dom B: yes. Oh yes

  11. bee says:
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    standard my gut says play karlos williams at flex over kendall wright or decker?

  12. Cheese says:
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    14 team keeper league. 0.5PPR.

    I give Todd Gurley and Marques Colton
    I get OBJ

    Gurley can be kept for $13 next year, it’s a $200 cap, that’s my only hesitation. OBJ woud cost too much to keep.

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Cheese: if its keeper and you cant keep Beckham its tough for me to do as Gurly should be star. if you’re going for it this year tho Beckham is absolute heist

  13. Pbmax says:
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    Need help. Start 3. Wr or TE league. Cobb, Hilton, efiert, Charles Johnson, funchess, Lockett.

    Also Sankey or Tevin?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Pbmax: Coleman over Sankey no question.

      Cobb, Eifert and probably Johnson. Hilton but is game time decision monday night so unless you have Moncrief or Dorsett you would be screwed

        • Tehol Beddict says:
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          @Pbmax: always cuuhh

  14. Mars says:
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    He’s starting Drew Brees. I have tyrod or kaep. Which way you go

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Mars: I like Kaep a lot this week but Tyrod should also ball. very tough call. I’m going Kaepernick

  15. Mike says:
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    Crockett over Reed? 1/2 pt ppr

    Thanks!

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Mike: nah I can’t go that far but Reed is banged up as usual but have to go Reed there

  16. Mark says:
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    is it worth it to risk starting ty hilton?
    my other WR are: brandon coleman, sammy watkins

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Mark: no. I like both those guys but would start Watkins

  17. beardown says:
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    standard league karlos williams kendall wright eric decker which is best flex play? mccoy looks iffy so im leaning williams

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @beardown: yea but if McCoy plays it simply has to be Kendall Wright. id go that route but like Karlos to get some work . if Mccoy is scratched obviously williams is the play

  18. Slippy says:
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    With ivory questionable do I just start sproles over him? PPR. no backup options for Monday.

    Also I’m starting rivers over tanny… you approve?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Slippy: Rivers over Tanny is totally fine tho i like bengals defensive backs so its a BIT risky but not crazy.

      Id still go Ivory. Everythign says he’s playing and he’s a warrior. with sproles you never know what he’s gonna do

  19. FrankGrimes says:
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    who you like Best for rest of the year Martin or Spiller?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @FrankGrimes: Martin I suppose. ppr gives Spiller a bit more credit

  20. Scott says:
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    man, funchess has been fungus. I want davante Parker instead. agree or disagree?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Scott: I’m fine with it altho FUnchess will be involved no idea on when Parker gets to play. Parker more upside and long term for sure

      • Scott says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: yep just a bench stash for now

  21. Mike says:
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    Hey bud, should I play yeldon or amari at flex? Jags hyping up yeldon, saying he may have 18 touches tomorrow, but Miami has a good def. Amari going up against jimmy smith for ravens, but carr back which is great. Thoughts? Thanks!

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Mike: ughhhhhh, such a crazy tough call. i hate both this week. probably have to go Yeldon in hopes he breaks one or gets goal line touch. Smith usually stays on right side so I suppose Cooper could move around and get some targets but I’m worried for oakland. Id probably go Yeldon but its honesty an impossible call to make hahah. Id lean Yeldon tho

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Mike: you know what, imma go Cooper

      • Mike says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: ha ya it’s def a tough call, coin flip. Cool, I’ll go coop and give u shit if it goes south ha. Thanks bud.

        • Tehol Beddict says:
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          @Mike: yea, i would tell you if leaning a certain way. i think u go Cooper with Oakland maybe being down and moving him around. the other corners other than Jimmy are trash and no Suggs on defense. has a chance. Yeldon been getting locked preseason and last week.

          • Mike says:
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            @Tehol Beddict: great call on amari, u the man, thank u!

  22. Andrew says:
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    A team in my league is looking to trade mark ingram and/or duke johnson. Any trade i can/should try to make
    My team:
    qb: m. Ryan
    Rb: l. Murray
    Rb. J. Stewart
    Wr. Calvin johnson
    Wr. Deandre hopkins
    Wr. Sammy watkins
    Te. Gronk
    Bn. Spiller, rashad jennings, k. Wright, wheaton, richard rogers, mariota
    I like my depth but i dont really like my starters at rb
    (12 team standard)
    Thanks!

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Andrew: Id grab ingram if possible. you could afford to trade watkins with Kendall Wright there or offer Jennings and Mariota. or Spiller and Wright for Ingram?

  23. Qbert says:
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    T, good evening. My shift on the wall tonight has come to end, so it’s time to set my lineup. I’ve got no idea this week…2 RB/2WR/1 flex. I know my J Hill will take a spot….but how to fill out the other 4??

    RBs: Latavius, Hamster, (CJZeroK (no))
    WR: Cobb, Mike Evans, Landry, Davante.

    I know it’s Saturday night in King’s Landing, so you may be enjoying one of Little Finger’s great “restaurants”, but this raven should get to you by Sunday morning. Let me know what you think. Winter is coming.

    The North remembers.
    -Q, first and only of his name.

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Qbert: good evening, mon frer. Murray and Hamster at RB.

      Cobb and oooooooh, this ones tough, lets say Landry annnnnnnnnnnnd Got to go Mike Evans if he playing obviously. and there you have it.

      Q, you shall be remembered throughout time for being a hero in every sense of the word. King of the North!

      • Qbert says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: thank you .
        Who has the gods’ blessing this week between latavius or the hamster? Jeremy hill, aka Daario Naharis holds down my RB1 slot. All I need is for one of those RB2s to reach paydirt

  24. Churrbadurr says:
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    10-team .5 PPR

    Who should I start as my flex:

    Terence Williams (If Alshon Jeffery plays) , Melvin Gordon or Dion Lewis?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Churrbadurr: Im going big on T-willy this week but also like Lewis as i expect a ton of dump offs. still tho, terrance has most upside here

  25. BornTooLate says:
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    Need to decide who to start in place of Hilton. I added moncrief and James jones early in the week. Honestly I’m leaning towards jones so I don’t get stuck on Revis island or screed by the ambiguity of Hilton’s status. Opponent has Luck and Johnson Monday night. No PPR. Thanks for the great posts and feedback you filth of a man.

    • BornTooLate says:
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      @BornTooLate: or I could snatch up Watkins….damn fantasy football is stressful.

      • Tehol Beddict says:
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        @BornTooLate: YAAAASSSS, put in Watkins, my G

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @BornTooLate: Riiiiight, for your sake i would assume IF Revis was to shadow a player it would be Andre Johnson and with Cromartie out Moncrief could feast like a PMSing Roseanne. Everyone likes James JOnes this week and he very well could get a td against a thinner than usual Seahawks secondary . its a toss up but I’ll go with Jones with you on this one. but i cant say i wont be happy if MY Seahawks shut him down.

      THank you for your kind words, ser.

  26. Mike says:
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    Great read…for my Flex spot…Charles Johnson or pick up Brandon Coleman and start. 10 team league standard.

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Mike: @Mike: VERY tough call. I’m going COleman this week as he becomes Brees’s fave red zone target. johnson should have decent week tho. thanks for reading, my goodman

  27. beardown says:
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    standard abdullah or duke johnson?

    • Jigboy22 says:
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      @beardown:

      Abdullah by a mile.

      • Tehol Beddict says:
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        @Jigboy22:oh he right

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @beardown: yea. Duke aint on the radar right now, bear daddy

  28. Jigboy22 says:
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    Standard 12 man league.

    Pick 3 por favor:
    Ingram
    Evans
    Abdullah
    J Brown
    Stewart
    Tate

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Jigboy22: Ingram Evans, Brown tho most would start abdullah over Brown. I like Brown against that secondary to have nice day

  29. Clos says:
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    Standard league.. Rbs are latavius Murray, alfred Morris, abdullah.. Wrs are Antonio Brown, Terrance Williams, Mike Evans.. So far I’ve got Morris and abdullah starting brown and Williams starting with Evans in the flex.. Don’t think Murray will do good against Baltimore.. Who would you start?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Clos: just like you have it. Got to start Evans if you have him. id consider Murray over Abdullah but Abdullah is the higher upside pick

  30. Tom says:
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    Rest of season question! Standard

    I can only keep 5 RB’s on my roaster who should I drop to make room for foster when the time comes?

    danny woodhead
    melvon gordon
    david johnson

    My other rb’s are Stewart and blount

    Thanks,

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Tom: probably has to be johnson unless he explodes today. dont really have a choice

  31. bobby says:
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    start hurns,moncrief,clay, or hopkins ppr

    • bobby says:
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      @bobby: not hopkins i meant funchess

  32. Johnie says:
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    Pick 2 ros
    Wheaton, michael floyd, cole beasley

  33. stoops says:
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    drop hurns or marvin jones for dorsett before he goes off?

  34. beardown says:
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    standard need 1 wr and 1 flex amari cooper kendall wright ameer abdullah

  35. Dan says:
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    Hey Tehol

    PPR Legue. Risk CJ Spiller today (I know he’s active but that damn snap count), or go with Lance Dunbar?

    Thanks!

  36. Johnie says:
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    pick 2 ros
    Wheaton, michael floyd, cole beasley, allen hurns

  37. Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
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    dude, you didn’t get your pick em’s in! this is probably good for me since i had so many wrong, but get em in!

    • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
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      @Aubrey Plaza’s Pillow: damn shame, i KNOW you’d have picked SEA here, i’d have gotten at least that game up on you.

  38. Dom B says:
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    Okay so I have tony romo and Eli Manning and Tony is out for several weeks. Should I drop Tony Romo or stash him and should I ride out on Eli Manning or should I add a quarterback from waiver, Available QBs Colin Kapernick, Derek Carr, Tyrod Taylor, Blake Bortles, Andy Dalton, Jameis Winston, Ryan Mallet, Teddy Bridgewater, Marcus Mariota, Johnny Manziel, Kirk Cousins, Nick Foles, and Jay Cutler Who do I drop if I pick one up…. ALSO is Jason Witten still a TE 1 with Weeden. Here is my roster

    QB Tony Romo
    RB Leveon Bell
    RB Jonathan Stewart
    WR Julio Jones
    WR AJ Green
    TE Jason Witten
    Flex Latavius Murray
    K STEVE HAUSCHKA
    DEF RAVENS
    Bench
    QB ELI MANNING
    WR KEENAN ALLEN
    RB GIO BERNARD
    WR JOHN BROWN
    WR STEVE SMITH
    RB lagarette blount

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