Remember a few weeks ago when I recounted my tale of  trading Dak Prescott because I had Deshaun Watson only to lose Deshaun Watson for the season? The QB I added was Tyrod Taylor. The Bills have one of the softest fantasy playoff schedules (Week 13: Patriots, Week 14: Colts, Week 15: Dolphins, Week 16: Patriots.) I like Nathan Peterman as a deep option and you’ll find him in my waiver column on Tuesday. And there will definitely be plenty of J. Peterman references. Teasers!

As always, if you’ve got league-specific questions, I’ve got league-specific answers down below…

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Fantasy football playoffs in many leagues will begin in 4 weeks — where do you stand? What do you need to make your last playoff push? Trade deadline should be approaching even sooner — time to take stock of of what your team is and isn’t good at — and perhaps even more importantly — what do your league mates need that you have an abundance of? The best owners have been tracking who their future playoff competitors have been suffering through and how they can take advantage.

Four teams on a bye week in week 11: Panthers, Colts, Jets, 49ers. Not a lot of fantasy points lost by those four teams not playing, but three of my favorite punching bags are now not targets for waiver adds. 

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Does anyone play in a league where you can trade FAAB dollars? I don’t know if there’s a website set-up for that, but there must be. I could see there being strategy involved with a trading a 4th wide receiver for $10 or using that extra cash to sweeten a deal. Especially over a long season, and if it was a keeper league to boot trading those extra dollars toward the end of the season could really make a difference. Well, I’m sold, if you’re interested check back in about eight months and I’ll have a league ready to go. Now, on to the show.

So this is Free Agent Auction Bidding, and we started the season with one hundred dollars. Ten weeks in, does anyone have any money left? (I have less than $10 in all my leagues) But let’s say you do, let’s say you missed out on all the guys you wanted up until this week, maybe you’ve added and dropped a couple defenses, but that’s it. In that case, spend spend spend!

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So yeah, I get it, the title is a bit overused in today’s parlance with the bizarre yet hypnotizing Adult Swim “horror-comedy-90’s sitcom” experience bringing the idiom back into style. Combined with the fact that I’d faint if you told me that this headline hadn’t been used by any other football writer before today when referring to Brandin Cooks (seen above with the 11-yard touchdown)… yeah, that saying’s been here before. But how apt! How meta I say! Because that’s exactly how I felt about last night’s prime time rematch of last year’s Super Bowl (did you know? You’d think they would mention that at least once last night!) that 95% of the Northeast tuned out of in the third quarter. There was some horror, some comedy, and of course Bill Belichek carries the whole 90’s sitcom vibe all by himself… but ultimately, it seemed to be a game that’d we’d all seen before and we were all the worse for it. And sure, while it might have been the Falcon’s gameplan all along, to give the Patriots a 23-point lead only to start a miraculous comeback of their own… problem was, the comeback never came and the Falcons looked about as good in the first three quarters yesterday as they did in the last quarter in the aforementioned Super Bowl. But there was fog! And lots of it! (I can’t find confirmation if it was coming out of Cris Collinsworth’s or Bob Costas’ mouth.) So instead of calling this a Super Bowl rematch, maybe we should call it the “Trent Green Bowl”? Kind of an “NFL’s concept” of what it’s like travelling through Trent Green’s head. You know, minus the purple bears and robot unicorns…

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I’ll warn you right now — there aren’t a lot of great QB fill in options this week. Lots of tough match-ups or under performing players. I had to recommend what remains of Teddy Bridgewater for Pete Carroll’s sake! You won’t see him listed in this article, but my prediction from last week of Colin Kaepernick getting a job still remains! Even if he’s now suing the exact people who could possibly offer him a job…

This week will see the Detroit Lions and Houston Texans getting the week off. You’ll need help replacing Matthew Stafford, Deshaun Watson, Lamar Miller, DeAndre Hopkins, Golden Tate and Ameer Abdullah.

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Image result for home dogs

Week 3 was a crazy, crazy week. Thanks Trump! I kidd. Blake Bortles, Case Keenum, and Eli Manning all threw for at least three touchdowns, with Bortles throwing four! The Jets dominated. It gets crazier, though. Eight of the games on Sunday had the road teams as favorites. The Jaguars, Colts, Bears, Jets, Bills, and Redskins all took care of business at home. Bow wow wow yipee yo yipee ya! Home dogs! The Lions should have won and the Chargers…well, just scroll down to the recap of that game and all will become clear.

The 2017-2018 Razzball Commenter Leagues for Basketball are now open. Get more info and join here!

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Greetings! Your baby mother’s favorite fantasy football gunslinger is back! “Hile, Beddict.” “Hile, Gunslinger!” I can hear you chanting it from your mother’s basement! I am very much looking forward to tomorrow’s games, for I will be in Las Vegas, spread eagle at the Palazzo, getting my gooch waxed for what will certainly be an entertaining week.

Legal weed….Prostitution…….Automatic weapons…..Prostitution…..Gambling……Prostitution…Who doesn’t love Las Vegas!? Last time I visited, I lost 10K betting the over of the Alabama/Texas A&M game back in 2012. Alabama, at home, on senior night, with Eddie F*CKING LACY couldn’t punch it in from the 3 yard line against one of the worst defenses in college football history………..WHAT THE F*CK!!>!!>?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!! WHY ME?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Anyway, wish me luck, and enjoy my work below, if it does ya.

I am Tehol Beddict and this is Disgrace/Delight! TAKE HEED!!!!

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No way dude, my league is so crazy deep, my boy Peter drafted Le’Veon bell when he was still in college… Yeah, well my boy Jimmy drafted Melvin Gordon during his Junior year of high school…No way man, my girl Cindy drafted Aaron Rodgers after going to his 7th birthday party… Not even close, my boy Dave drafted Antonio Brown after seeing his ultrasound pictures.

Everyone in their league either knows someone who “got that guy way before he hit it big”.  If you don’t know, him, congratulations, you are him.  Most owners just need to hit it big once, and can ride out an entire season, or multiple, based on that success.  Given a standard 10 or 12 team league, in which you are already drafting 2 or 3 premier players, hitting it big on 1 or 2 sleepers puts you in contention every year.

But there are some of you out there that are gluttons for punishment.  You know who you are, you 18 team, AFC only, starting 2 QB, 3 RB, 2 TE, and 4 Defenses.  Those of you starting practice squad players hoping for a half-time call up.  You are monsters, heathens, and abominations.  And I love you.

This post space will be dedicated to monitoring those low percentage players that are primed to take your deep-league teams to the promised land.  I will try to focus on players that can contribute now, and/or players that have the potential to help down the road.

Short, simple, and to the point: here are some players that are, on average, owned in less than 3% of league’s, that may have a chance to help you out this week…

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Hey guys, we are only a few weeks away from real football! Football that actually counts! Holy moly! I’ve been a bit tied up these past few weeks, and haven’t been able to finish my division previews (thanks a lot Sammy Watkins, Ezekeiel Elliot, Julian Edelman and Spencer Ware). So let’s do that, with the final two coming in the AFC West and South. So for today, let’s look at the AFC South!

Take me on in the Razzball Commenter Leagues for a chance at prizes! Free to join, leagues still open!

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