If you aren’t familiar with the history between Justin Herbert and Marcus Mariota, I’ll clue you in on the story. Back in middle school the two NFL quarterbacks actually played on the same youth hockey team. It was a rag tag bunch of kids, coached by a down on his luck attorney with a drinking problem. That’s the plot to Mighty Ducks, Hebert and Mariota played college football for the Oregon Ducks, and not even at the same time. Alright, fine random italicized voice, you win. You always win. The point is, they’re both ducks! And one of these ducks quacked just a little louder on Thursday night: rookie Justin Herbert. The kid went off in primetime going 22/32 for 314 yards, 4 carries for 14 yards, 2 passing touchdowns and 1 rushing touchdown–he now has 27 passing touchdowns on the year, tying the all-time rookie record. Unfortunately, the quarterback he’s just tied isn’t a legend like Peyton Manning or Tom Brady, it’s Baker Mayfield. Wah, wah. It’s an impressive feat regardless, and Herbert still has two full games remaining. He’s going to be good for a long time. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday for fantasy football:

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So you know how I spend every Sunday morning hiding in the bushes outside Darren Waller’s bathroom just trying to sneak a peek? Well this week I saw something I shouldn’t have while lurking in the bushes. Jets head coach Adam Gase was having a secret meeting with Waller. I zipped up my pants and snuck closer to find out what they were saying. I heard Gase whisper, “We really need to lose for Lawrence today. Can you help us, Darren?” So I wasn’t at all surprised when Darren Waller exploded with 13 catches for 200 yards and his 6th and 7th touchdowns as the Jets narrowly maintained their winless pace and solidified their stranglehold on the number one overall pick. Waller is quickly closing the once massive Kelce gap. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday for fantasy football:

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It’s starting to feel more like football season, eh? The SEC is back, the Big 12 is playing in conference games, and the Big Ten is now under a month away from football. If that’s not enough for you, the NFL is sizzling through two weeks and we are on to week 3. I have far fewer complaints about the level of play than I thought I would and I am thrilled about it. Do you all remember the first weeks of the officiating strike a few years back? Do you remember how watching football wasn’t nearly as enjoyable as a result? That is sort of what I was expecting, but here we are. The quality of play is fine, our star players are dynamic. The injury bug was bad last week, but if 2020 has taught us anything; if there is a sliver of hope for normalcy, you just have to embrace it. 

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After the week two Bloody Sunday Massacre, I knew it would be tough watching Monday Night Football this week. Anytime my man Darren Waller touched the ball I flinched in anticipation of another torn ACL or high ankle sprain. My standing Tuesday morning appointment with my fantasy football therapist, where I usually just complain about how unlucky I got in the past week’s matchups, will now be used to work thru this post traumatic fantasy stress syndrome. Fortunately, Darren Waller is one player I won’t need to cry about during that session as he destroyed the Saints’ defense with 12 catches for 103 yards and his 1st touchdown—let’s just hope he didn’t injure his back while carrying the Raiders offense. I ranked Big Sexy Waller as my #3 tight end and #36 overall in my 2020 fantasy football rankings so I’m looking pretty smart, as long as you ignore where I ranked Kerryon Johnson and a bunch of other players. Also, don’t ask why I’m required to wear a helmet around my house. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday for fantasy football:

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Week 1 is finally here! Are you ready for some football? Thursday night party! And by party I mean small gatherings of less than 6 people. 

B_Don and Donkey Teeth have to talk about the recent Odell Beckham story to lead off the show. Then, we get into the tight end overview. Both of us have Kelce over Kittle and then we talk about DT’s infatuations, Darren Waller and Rob Gronkowski. We give our case for why we are lower on Tyler Higbee than the industry coming off his strong 2019 finish. B_Don then tries to talk DT off Jonnu Smith’s bum a**. 

After the TE discussion, we take a look at some seasonal awards where we both give you our MVPs, draft values, SB predictions, sleepers, busts, breakouts, and ROY. We wrap up the show with a couple of fan questions from @AGrieke and @BensGotTweets as they prepare for week 1. 

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Danny Kelly of the Ringer, stops by the Razzball Football Podcast to chat with B_Don and Donkey Teeth. We discuss Raheem Mostert’s trade/contract demands, and how the 49ers RB situation could play out moving forward.

Then we move on and take a look at Danny’s #SFBX (Scott Fish Bowl 10) draft, and his general strategy for the event. We ask him about his draft strategy, his slllloooowwww draft, and ask him about the expectations for some of his team members.

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Ryan McDowell of Dynasty League Football stops by to talk all sorts of football goodness. We start with the Cam Newton signing where Ryan and B_Don are on the opposite side from Donkey Teeth. 

Ryan is un-officially, well, we assigned him the title, VP of the Scott Fish Bowl (SFBX), so, we asked him about his involvement and what kind of workload this event puts on him.

Then, on to the good stuff, we talk to the SFB vet about his SFBX draft strategy with some of the interesting wrinkles that Scott put in this season. Ryan discusses his plan with the adjustments to the scoring, specifically toward QBs.

In both SFB and standard re-drafts, we discuss how to fight the urge to go with dynasty rankings, and avoid the shiny bobble. Speaking of WRs, we ask Ryan if the current class, and looking foward, the 2021 class, can keep up with the seasons our ’19 rookies provided. And of course, we have to ask Ryan about our ongoing Andrews/Waller debate. 

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Deep in the hills of Los Angeles, there is a sacred space of learning that the kids call, “UCLA.” For those not familiar with the nature of university, it is like a bank where you can keep borrowing money no matter how bad your report card is. On the outskirts of UCLA, there is a junction where students spend their borrowed money. Hip shoppers stop at the Whole Foods, put their Chase Sapphire cards into a point-of-sale machine, and smile with maskless glee as the POS takes nine bucks from their account for a single watermelon. Across the street, there’s an In-N-Out, where students shout “ANIMAL STYLE” and wait for their slathered beef like it was the first co-ed on screen in a slasher film. 

In the winter, the Rose Bowl celebrates the imagined paradise that is California: the orange groves, the rose gardens, the summer nights on the beach with a Mai Tai. The RazzBowl, however, celebrates the real paradise that is California: Raiders Chargers Rams greasy burgers and expensive watermelons. And just like your friends want you to come out for one more $15 Mai Tai before taking the Uber to your dad’s condo, the RazzBowl wants you on board for the wildest ride in fantasy football. 

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Since time immemorial tight ends have perplexed the world. We all know you want an end that’s tight, but how tight is too tight? The great Albert Einstein tackled this enigma with his theory of relativity, where he concluded Darren Waller epitomizes the perfect balance of tightness and plumpness in the end department. And who is Donkey Teeth to argue with genius Einstein? Waller’s an adonis of a man, and well endowed too.

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Our buddy Pat Fitzmaurice of FootballGirl.com and the Fitz on Fantasy podcast stops by to reminisce about his strong performance in the inaugural RazzBowl last year. B_Don and Donkey Teeth ask Pat about his strategy for this year’s RazzBowl. Then, we ask him about some of the players from his team last season to see what he thinks about them for 2020.

Whether he’s done with David Johnson and where he would take Dalvin Cook with a pending holdout looming. He weighs in with the ongoing TE feud between podcast hosts, Mark Andrews vs Darren Waller, before we move onto some discussion about his Green Bay Packers.

We ask him about Aaron Jones possible holdout, and the Packers questionable draft day moves. He gives us his thoughts on who he’s looking at to fill in at WR after Davante Adams. B_Don tries to understand the fascination with Jace Sternberger. 

The guys wrap up with some rookie RB talk from Pat’s Wisconsin fellow alum, Jonathan Taylor, to Clyde Edwards-Helaire, and his overall ranks of the big 5 rookie RBs. 

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