Greetings! Tis I, returning to the glorious world of writing after three long years studying the art forms of Yoga, selflessness and celibacy. I won’t dedicate a significant amount of time discussing the past, as I prefer to live in the now, but in order to make an agonizingly long and fascinating story short (Details saved for the book), my Guru instructed me to expunge my pen name, Tehol Beddict; for in order to shed the purest levels of light and love, one must crawl from the shadows, exposing their mind, body, and soul, for all to witness, for all to judge like Sir William Wallace on the execution block. Yes, there’s a reasonable chance I have my genitals and intestines removed with a dull shovel, get stretched like Rita Farr making sweet love to Mr. Fantastic, only to then receive the kind of whooping Adrian Peterson himself would be proud of before ultimately being beheaded……….BUT, there’s also a decent chance that Mel Gibson makes a movie detailing the events of my life. Say one thing for Mel Gibson, say he’s a psychotic anti-semitic, racist, who’s fall from grace has been been more horrendous than celebrity that is not currently rotting in prison. You know who also had a fall from what was a brief grace? My man, Tygod! The Rodfather! Read on, if you’re curious as to why the man is ranked by PFF, ahead of some of your fantasy faves like: Drew Lock, Josh Allen, Teddy Bridgewater, Daniel Jones, my boy Gardner Minshew and Joe Burrow. He’s two spots behind KYLER MURRAY! Interested yet? Take heed! 

 

Those of you who know me from back in the olden days (maybe like two of you) will undoubtedly recall that I was the FIRST analyst to go on the record saying Tyrod Taylor would win the starting job for Buffalo in camp, and be a solid fantasy option at that. There I go again, being the opposite of selfless, but I’m just trying to reiterate the fact that I’ve been Rod supporter since his days at Virginia Tech. The man was able to produce at a high level for the Bills, with arguably the worst weapons we, as human beings, have ever witnessed. Sammy Watkins was injured for what seemed like the entirety of Taylor’s Buffalo tenure, leaving Charley Clay, who was also incredibly injury prone, as his number one option. What Taylor was able to accomplish in that pathetic situation was almost godlike in my opinion. I won’t dwell on the past, as again, I like to live in the present, so no need to speak on the atrocities that occurred in the dumpster fire which some of you refer to as the Browns of Cleveland. Let’s talk about what’s happening in the gorgeous, currently locked down city of Angels! 

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Andy Behrens of Yahoo joins B_Don and Donkey Teeth on the most recent episode. We ask Andy about some of the NFL news, the Washington football team changing their name, Devonta Freeman’s agent is out, and the Raheem Mostert trade demand.

We then move on to Andy’s #SFBX (Scott Fish Bowl 10) team. Andy is a drafting legend after this one, bringing in a 0.0 draft time for 22 rounds. We ask him about his RB duo of Josh Jacobs and D’Andre Swift, along with his QBs in Lamar Jackson, Tom Brady, and Phillip Rivers.

The guys continue the industry league talk with some #RazzBowl 2 talk. Andy talks about his misses in the inaugural season, and how he will approach it differently this year. We ask him about his FAAB strategy and how he plans to handle COVID/byes/injuries in the year that is 2020. We wrap up by asking Andy whether he has a Howie Kendrick in football. 

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Another Election day has come and gone. Whether you’re red, blue, or somewhere in between, hopefully you made it out to the polls and made your voice count. Politicians are a lot like streaming fantasy options. You don’t really know if you made the right choice until it’s too late. Regardless of your choice, it’s very possible that you get absolute nothing out of them. And every now and then, you find one worth of holding on to for the foreseeable future.

To be honest, the vote with the most impact on my life was to the Sunday brunch bill that will move the alcohol service time in Georgia on Sundays up from 12:30 PM to 11:00 AM. Brunch is a huge thing in the South and it always felt odd to me that you couldn’t sit down on Sunday and enjoy a nice mimosa or bloody mary until about the time NFL games start. And don’t even get me started on the lack of alcohol on the golf course on Sunday mornings…

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Welcome to the start of 2018 NFL DFS season. You’re probably familiar with Donkeycorns, the wandering mythical creature who rewards your trust with a path through the desert, from the MLB Closer Report. In DFS A Donkey is someone that does foolish things. When it comes to daily fantasy, we’re all Donkeys sometimes. I’m your DFS Donkeycorn. Follow me through the fantasy desert.

Did you use Rudy’s Tools for the MLB season? You probably enjoyed success if you did. The biggest advantage a model gives you is its consistency. It doesn’t have biases. It won’t get mad at Julio Jones for not scoring touchdowns, despite the natural variability of NFL TD scoring. I recently asked Rudy how difficult it would be to start my own model. His response was, considering I have over 1,000 hours sunk into mine this off-season, not very. So get the 7-day free trial, pay for the season once that ends, and be glad Rudy exists to grind away at a projection system so you don’t have to. I’ll focus on the Sunday main slate using Fanduel pricing below.

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Week 3 was a crazy, crazy week. Thanks Trump! I kidd. Blake Bortles, Case Keenum, and Eli Manning all threw for at least three touchdowns, with Bortles throwing four! The Jets dominated. It gets crazier, though. Eight of the games on Sunday had the road teams as favorites. The Jaguars, Colts, Bears, Jets, Bills, and Redskins all took care of business at home. Bow wow wow yipee yo yipee ya! Home dogs! The Lions should have won and the Chargers…well, just scroll down to the recap of that game and all will become clear.

The 2017-2018 Razzball Commenter Leagues for Basketball are now open. Get more info and join here!

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Last week’s waiver wire recommendations didn’t go entirely according to plan. Only the Rams defense and Jeremaine Kearse performed as I predicted. However, some of those guys like Rex Burkhead, Evan Engram and Younghoe Koo were me trying to play the long con. By season’s end is when they’ll start having their value.

Finally football season is back in full swing and we can start making REAL predictions. No more prognosticating — just cold, hard facts. Like the Jacksonville Jaguars and LA Rams meeting in the Super Bowl! FACTS!

Here we go with my waiver adds of the week! These are guys you should think of grabbing if one of your starters is injured or if Kirk Cousins was who we thought he was. Obvious grabs of the week: Marqise Lee (due to Allen Robinson’s injury), Kerwynn Williams (due to David Johnson’s injury) and Kendall Wright (due to Kevin White’s injury.)

If you’ve got league specific questions, I’ve got league specific answers — leave a comment below!

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My favorite NFL soundbite is of Vince Lombardi yelling out to one of his legendary Packer teams, “What the hell’s going on out here?” I laugh every time because it’s really a statement that can be used in almost any context. Driving in heavy traffic on the freeway through a construction zone and see a bunch of guys standing around: (insert Lombardi.) Trying to catch up on some “light reading” in the bathroom and your kids sound like a freakin’ parade is going through your living room: (insert Lombardi.) But, because it’s from the football universe, I thought it was an appropriate transition into this week’s RCL updates…

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Greeting and salutations! Tis I, Beddict, back from a Thanksgiving vacation full of oiled up women and turkey basters galore. I come to you rejuvenated and ready to finish the season strong. I missed my 2nd lock of the week two weeks ago with Minnesota back-dooring me at home against Green Bay, and I’m just now getting over the burning sensation in my soul that makes the savage sting from a Portuguese man o’ war seem like a nip from a 15-year-old, toothless Beagle.

I sort of made up for it with a 5-0 week during my vacation. Did that pay for my mortgage for a year or just erase my debt to the Russian Mob? I’ll never tell. The quest for the perfect week continues… I suppose I was perfect last week but that wasn’t my usual full slate of games. I’m not one to look for the easy way out… unless of course I’m locked in Sky’s basement again. In that case, I’ll always take the easy way out, for that was one of the most trying and terrifying moments of my life. Let’s get on with it before I have to blow another six figures on my therapist.

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Greetings! Tis I, Beddict, the Godfather of sexual mischief and fantasy football knowledge alike, here to continue this storied tradition that we here at Razzball refer to as, Disgrace/Delight. We’re on a word count this week so we better get right to it. I will continue to cover film and television but we had too much football and not enough space this week and for that, I apologize. Okay, let’s get on with it then! Take Heed!

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