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Hrm…how am I gonna do this…*Goes and reads ‘How To Sell A Bad Idea For Dummies*. I got it! He’s cheap! Yikes, readers and readettes, we’re really digging down into the down and dirty at QB suggesting Jake Locker at $5,400 but there’s some reason for optimism here. One, it’s your money, not mine…JK. The big reason I’m staring down the barrel of Jake’s cannon arm is the matchup. The Jets have been a wreck in the secondary all year. So bad, they’ve allowed a top 15 or better finish to quarterbacks with names like Alex Smith, Teddy Bridgewater and Kyle Orton (twice). If you were looking for a sign that something’s not working, Orton hanging big weeks on you more than once in a season is a pretty good indicator. Now of course, none of this touts Locker as a great play. He’s a risk. A big one, in fact. There’s no sign nor indication that Locker will ever be a good NFL QB at this point but DFS DGAF, y’all! Boy can scramble. Let’s just pretend that he has ‘started’ 4 games this year since he was hurt half way through week 4 and has played back to back 4th quarters the last two weeks when Zach Mettenberger’s shoulder turned into ground beef. In those ‘4 starts’, Locker has averaged about 34 yards on the ground and has a rushing TD to his credit. The great thing about rushing TDs? They’re worth more than passing TDs…seriously, you play this game, why am I telling you? So Locker could net you 9 points with 30 yards rushing and a TD without doing much out of the norm for his style of play. Now let’s take that ‘could’ and tack on the bad passing defense to date by the Jets that has allowed a 29:5 TD to INT ratio and an average of 258 passing yards a game for the year. Now let’s not kid ourselves, this could easily blow up in our faces like we just got a present from Jokey Smurf so I wouldn’t get cute and play him in cash games. That said, if you’re a GPP’in, you’re lookin’ to cut corners on pricing wherever you can and this could be that one time you’ll remember the 2014 Titans fondly. Enjoy. But enough about Denzel Washington, let’s move on. Here’s my red hot takes for the week 14 DK slate…

New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 10 team league of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It lets us know that you care!

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 grayjoy

Perhaps more recently known as Reek, Theon Greyjoy is the heir of Lord Balon Greyjoy of the Iron Islands in the ever popular Game of Thrones saga. At the age of nine, he was left as a hostage by his father with the House of Stark as a condition of surrender. Despite being a hostage, Theon was treated well by they Starks, and he a Robb Stark became best friends. Depicted in the HBO series as an arrogant and narcissistic person on the outside, Theon is actually weak, insecure, and unsure of himself. After turning on Robb Stark when he was sent home to Pyke to seek an alliance with Balon Greyjoy, through a series of events, life for Theon took a drastic turn. He unknowingly attempted to seduce his own sister, was rejected by his birth father, seized Winterfell, was betrayed by his own men, and eventually found himself the tortured prisoner of Roose Bolton’s bastard son, Ramsay Snow, who cut off his manhood (literally), renamed him Reek, and turned him into his own human pet.

But now on to some legitimate Gray joy…

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Follow me, if you will, into the minds of the casual DraftKings player. Casual player sees Kyle Orton and how badly he played on Thursday Night Football. Casual player is disgusted by this. Casual player is even more disgusted by Kyle’s neck beard. Casual player is never playing Orton in any fantasy situation, ever. Well, sorry casuals but that’s how you lose: by saying never. That’s the great thing about this here game we play. It’s daily, not seasonal. You don’t have to own Kyle the entire year, you just have to own him for the right matchup and when the price is right, you’re even better off. Now I’m gonna discuss a bit of strategy. It’s a general way of processing or viewing your salaries over there on the DK. Take those salaries and divide them by 1,000. That should give you some kind of decimal point. For Kyle this week because he’s $5,400, that number would be 5.6. Now take that decimal number and multiply it by 5. For Orton, that gives you (5.6*5=) 28. Casual players don’t do this which is why casual players let a start at home against an opponent who’ve given up the most fantasy points per game to opposing QBs on the year slide by. To date, the Jets have given up 25 passing touchdowns to only 3 INT. Oh and the last time Orton faced them? He collected 4 of those TDs and zero of those INT, finishing with 26.12 DK points. Now I’m not making the promise he’ll do that again but here’s a little dirty DK secret. Those top tier QBs? Yeah, they’re priced about 9K most weeks. So for example, Aaron Rodgers is 9,900 this week. That’s nice. So for him to really reach a good value for you in a tourney, you either need (9.9*5=) 49.5 points from him – his highest point output this year is 39.6 – or you need to find values around him at much lower price tags that will go off. Trust me, I’ve been there and it’s hard to do. It’s much simpler to aim for a lower priced QB with a good matchup most weeks. It’s just too hard to find that blend and be that handicapped at the skill positions most weeks to warrant such a thing. I know, I know, none of this says Orton’s any good but was Austin Davis when he threw for 375 against the Eagles? Yeah, not so much. If given the opportunity to pay down at QB, most weeks follow Nike’s mantra and just do it. All this to say, if you can’t tell, I’m strictly calling Orton a GPP only play this week. Heck, he could get pulled at halftime after the kiss of death vote of confidence on Monday. But it’s hard to imagine that happening so I’ll be rolling with him plenty. But enough about neck beards, let’s get on with this. Here are my red hot takes for the week 12 DK slate…

New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 10 team league of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It lets us know that you care!

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Ugh, I’m making the lead paragraph about Mark Sanchez. I know, blech.  I might as well have talked about Bob Dole here, it would’ve been just as exciting.  But the reality is, despite him not getting drafted even in 2QB leagues, Sanchez was set to be the starting quarterback for the Jets this year.  You […]

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Well, we’ve gone through just about every type of 20 there is this week. We’ve brought you the Top 20 Quarterbacks, Running Backs, and Wide Receivers and now we’re here to talk about Tight Ends for our 2013 Fantasy Football Rankings. On the one hand, the position is deep. On the other hand, there’s really only two ringers in the bunch that will outpace their TE compadres by enough that you’ll truly notice. On the third hand which is actually just a cut out of the Hamburger Helper that I’ve glued to my shirt, Tight End is the position just behind QB on which I’m going to say do not take a top one unless they fall to you in the draft. It’s a position that had a few surprises last year that crept into the top 10 and I fully expect the same to happen this year for various reasons. In shallow enough leagues, I’m going to be very tempted to stream them as needed until it proves I have a keeper or until someone notices it and starts hoarding guys like Marcedes Lewis. At that point, it’s clear I’ve done my job: made someone done lose their minds. But that’s my approach and not what this is all about. This is the Top 20 Tight Ends for 2013 Fantasy Football…

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Well there were rumors of it and inklings and rumors of said inklings but it finally happened. On Wednesday, Reggie Bush signed with the Detroit Lions on a 4 year deal which sets in motion some fantasy commotion of major implications. Firstly, getting the former Kim Kardashian ass caddy is going to make waves in Detroit which is funny because he just moved from South Beach to do it. At least I think that’s funny. *Checking* no, it’s decidedly not but what is funny is Bush’s new teammate Mikel LeShoure eating a bag of weed before the officers could find his stash. Maybe they should trade him to Denver or Seattle now…well anywho, I’m not here to talk about Mikel. At least not yet. In getting Reggie, the Lions grabbed a great Jahvid Best replacement. You know, the running back who was probably the starter had concussions not taken his career from him. Why do we like this and by this I mean the Bush signing and not the concussion? Because in 22 games as a Lion, Best caught 85 passes which is a 62 catch pace for a 16 game season. When you consider Detroit has attempted the most passes of any team the last two years, the passing volume for great things is going to be there for Bush to be fairly Sprolesy. Overall, he probably will cede some touches to both Mikel and Joique Bell, there’s enough to go around for him to stay a solid RB2 in PPR leagues. And of course, Reggie’s exit from Miami along with the Mike Wallace signing should increase the stock of Lamar Miller dramatically. Sounds like I have some game film to watch and a post to write, yes? Yup and yup but we’re not here for that right now so let’s take a look at more moves from day two of the NFL free agent market for 2013 fantasy football…

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I heard the news on Wednesday…oh boy. About an Alex Smith that was in a trade. My apologies to the Beatles, their fans, Chiefs fans, and any other amalgamation of those three, this is gonna get ugly fast. The 49ers agreed to trade Alex to the Kansas City Chiefs for compensational picks on March 12th, the first day off-season trades can be made official. At the time of this writing, it sounds like a 2013 second round pick and a similar pick for 2014 in exchange for a quarterback whose most successful season came in 2012 with 3,144 yards and 17 touchdown passes. If you’re unable to read sarcasm font or just aren’t familiar with fantasy football in general, this isn’t going to be sleeper post on Alex. In fact, most of this post is going to take a look moreso at what others will do with this move than it will be to do with what Alex will. Sorry for you diehard game manager quarterback lovers out there, this post probably won’t be for you. But enough with this, let’s see what impact Alex Smith and this trade will have on the 2013 fantasy football landscape…

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It feels weird making Montell Owens a suggestion. I mean, he’s been the starter for Jacksonville for the last couple of weeks, there are no signs we see Maurice Jones-Drew at any point for the rest of the season and Rashad Jennings has done nothing to prove he deserves more than a bit role when he fully recovers from his concussion. However, facts are facts. Montell is still owned in only 27% of yahoo leagues and only 11% over at ESPN and I’ve never seen a starting RB I didn’t like. Well, there’s Michael Turner but that’s for an entirely different post. What I see is a flex play in a playoff week where anything goes. The studs that got you to week 16 could be sitting in week 17. I remember the one year I played the championship in week 17 because I accidentally didn’t set it correctly for week 16 before the season started. I won because I picked up the 43 yards, 4 receptions and the touchdown Jerheme Urban brought to the table that week. Don’t know who that is? Good, you shouldn’t. Welcome to what David Bowie no doubt was singing about. Week 17 is all about the guys who don’t start typically but are going to get the snaps to prove they should at least make the team’s practice squad the next year. So with that, let’s take a look at just a few more week 17 heroes for 2012 fantasy football…

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Alright, Razzball Nation, help me follow the bouncing logic ball.  Knowshon Moreno goes from virtually ignored before his first start of the season week 12, to casual low RB2 call in week 13 and 14.  Then when given a plum matchup vs the Raiders, he finally delivers to the tune of a top 5 fantasy […]

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“Pressure pushing down on me Pressing down on you no man ask for Under pressure that burns a building down… Chippin’ around, kick my brains across the floor These are the days, when it rains it pours… Insanity laughs under pressure we’re cracking Can’t we give ourselves one more chance?” “Under Pressure” Queen/David Bowie It’s […]

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