Look, it’s your fault. You’re playing through to week 17 as your championship. No one put a gun to your head to make it that way. You went into your options, selected weeks 15 through 17 as your playoffs so now you get to talk about backups that no one has talked about all year. Well ok, we’ve talked about Christine Michael in passing. He had a strong preseason for the Seahawks but we all knew the story would end there. Seattle is Beastmode country and we all know it. But what happens if the Seahawks lock up home field advantage through the rest of the NFC playoffs this Sunday? What are they playing for in week 17? I mean, I get that it’s at home and they’ll want to keep that pristine home record intact but are they really gonna roll RW3 and company out there for abuse in a game that doesn’t matter much all day? I’m gonna have to say what my magic 8 ball says when I ask if I’ll become a famous hand model: unlikely…you’ve got a couple of hammer fingers…and why don’t you clean your nails? My Magic 8 Ball gets a bit personal sometimes…but nevermind all that, we’re here to talk about Christine. I have a hard time believing Turbin gets to run the show. He’s still too important for the playoff run to put him out there too much and so in steps Michael. Though it’s hard enough to predict the future in weekly rankings, I’m here trying to predict how a team will do in two weeks and whether or not they’ll even run their starters out on the field so give me some slack if this don’t work, y’all. Given that the Rams are in the bottom five for points against from opposing RBs, Christine is set up for a nice day if he finds the field. And if he goes off, we’ll have to spend the rest of the off-season hearing about him going in the 2nd or 3rd round in 2014. Joy. But let’s finish this show off. Here’s the rest of the ideas I’ve got brewing for week 17 of this crazy 2013 Fantasy Football season…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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So maybe we got off on the wrong foot last week. I can’t take all the blame, of course. You’re the one who said you had a third leg because you put a sock on your woo-ha. That’s the wrong foot with me every day of the week. But what I mean by this is explaining what the funk ‘Thinking Forward’ means. You’re in the playoffs so your lineup is already pretty good and so is your bench, most likely. So all I’m trying to do is give you some ideas on future week pickups because you’ve already got your lineup set for this week and since this is the time I’d normally be telling you to buy/sell for trade purposes, I figured I might as well tell you what you can tuck away for the following week instead. Ahem, I did say tuck it. Couldja do so with said foot apparel right now? It’s distracting…but now that we’ve got the premise set up, let’s take a giant leap forward into week 16. For all intents and purposes, the Colts aren’t really playing for much down the stretch besides maybe trying to figure out how they can be 8-5 with such a terrible team on hand. Oh wait, they play in the same division as the Jaguars, Texans and Titans and are 4-0 within it. Yeah, that’ll do it. I don’t know how they won earlier in the year vs the 49ers, Seahawks and Broncos given the team we’ve seen over the last 5 weeks. And before you get angry, Colts fans, this team’s point differential on the year is -3…yes, they’ve scored three less points than their opponents as a whole on the year and still have 8 wins to show for it. That’s a fishy line if I’ve ever smelled one. That’s just your upper lip! I told you, Colts fans, don’t be angry. Just realize there are 5 teams in the plus as of this typing that might not make the playoffs and be thankful. All this to say, I don’t think the Chiefs are gonna have a tough week with Indy at home and think Knile Davis will have himself a solid fantasy day. The Chiefs are the second best team in the AFC right now by record and the only way that even matters in terms of seeding is if Denver reels off 2 losses in the last 3 weeks and KC wins out, which makes it all the more likely we won’t see a huge amount of the starters in the game for the Chiefs on week 16 Sunday. Am I telling you to be scared to start Jamaal Charles? Hells to the no, children. But I do think Davis has a sneaky shot at reproducing his week 14 line or better: 47 total yards on 12 touches and a TD. Sure, its flexy sexy but nothing great but you never know when injuries might strike. Just ask AP owners. If your main RB goes down week 15 and you still manage to make the Shiva Bowl, having Knile on speed dial is a nice consolation prize in my book. And with that, let’s move on. Here are some other suggestions for week 16 pick ups for 2013 Fantasy Football…

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Well, he ain’t from down in Louisiana close to New Orleans. Then again, he might be. Didn’t read the bio. This is fantasy, not A Football Life. We don’t care if Jacoby Jones is from near Lake Titicaca, we just care that he has an awesome Sunday for us. Or Monday. Or sometimes Thursday. Anyone think we’ll eventually just have football on 7 days a week? I think they’ve expanded college football to pretty much every day but Tuesday and Wednesday at this point. Not that I’m complaining, of course, just wanted to know I’m not the only one seeing this trend. Speaking of trends, sometimes they’re your friend. Well, not the kind you can borrow money from or go to the bar with but a friend nonetheless. The trend I speak of is the Detroit Lions secondary and how it just loves to give up points to secondary receivers for teams. Let’s ignore Green Bay’s passing debacle and look back at a few secondary receivers who’ve benefited from facing the Lions in the last few weeks. Week 12 saw Tiquan Underwood drop a 3/108/2 line on them. Week 11 saw a healthy line of 3/48/1 from Cotchery. Week 9 saw a 2/64/1 line from Terrance Williams of the Cowboys. Ok, with all this good can we stamp him as a must play for week 15? Nah, of course not. But your team needs force you into strange positions sometimes. Hopefully not the lotus blossom…fantasy football isn’t THAT kind of fantasy. But if you need a nice gamble at flex or WR3 for week 15, Jones could be the Jacoby of all trades for you. Hrm, or free agent pickups I guess. But that doesn’t flow off the wordpress tongue quite as well. But enough about tongues, strange positions and Underwood, let’s move along and see who else is a good pick up for week 15 of 2013 Fantasy Football…

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Well, you finally made it. Or you kinda made it. Still a week left and anything can happen until you get that asterisk next to your team name and unlike Barry Bonds, getting that asterisk next to it is a good thing. This is gonna be a potpourri post of sorts and by that I don’t mean it’s gonna smell like the insert in a Good Housekeeping magazine. I’m gonna touch on a few strategies as best I can. Unlike other Fantasy Football machine-driven sites, I’m the hard drive, the mother brain, the encrypted file to this whole Razzball rankings game we got going on. Which also leads me down paths some would fear to tread some weeks. I have my moments of striking gold but also moments of hitting my neighbor’s sewage pipe so let’s not freak too much the funk out if you disagree with my musings. But this is a DST post to end all DST posts so let’s not dawdle about. Here’s some playoff strategies for your playoff run for 2013 Fantasy Football…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It feels weird making Montell Owens a suggestion. I mean, he’s been the starter for Jacksonville for the last couple of weeks, there are no signs we see Maurice Jones-Drew at any point for the rest of the season and Rashad Jennings has done nothing to prove he deserves more than a bit role when he fully recovers from his concussion. However, facts are facts. Montell is still owned in only 27% of yahoo leagues and only 11% over at ESPN and I’ve never seen a starting RB I didn’t like. Well, there’s Michael Turner but that’s for an entirely different post. What I see is a flex play in a playoff week where anything goes. The studs that got you to week 16 could be sitting in week 17. I remember the one year I played the championship in week 17 because I accidentally didn’t set it correctly for week 16 before the season started. I won because I picked up the 43 yards, 4 receptions and the touchdown Jerheme Urban brought to the table that week. Don’t know who that is? Good, you shouldn’t. Welcome to what David Bowie no doubt was singing about. Week 17 is all about the guys who don’t start typically but are going to get the snaps to prove they should at least make the team’s practice squad the next year. So with that, let’s take a look at just a few more week 17 heroes for 2012 fantasy football…

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I don’t blame Fireman Ed for walking away disgustipated with his Jets.  It’s hard to stay upbeat and ready to support your team after such a performance.  By now, we’ve all learned that Mark Sanchez is a big Sir Mix-A-Lot fan with his unholy gravitational pull towards Moore’s backside

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With the majority of trade deadlines closing last week, I thought it best to move on to a subject we all know is important but sometimes we have a hard time looking beyond the week at hand.  With thinking forward, I’m going to do my best to pander to those who are playoff bound and may have room on their bench to look beyond the week at hand. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?