My apologies for the quick and short and sudden intro, but I have hit a “creative writer’s block” when it comes to the intro for the week. Alas, I do not have any stories to tell and rapidly tie back to fantasy football. Hopefully it works for next week.
So let’s just jump right into it, cool? Alright.
Please, blog, may I have some more?
by: Alex Lee
Hello everyone and welcome to “Please Tell Me When It’s Safe to Go Outside”, Razzball’s new weekly piece where we wonder what the hell is going on, and debate whether or not we should venture into the terrifying outdoors to see what hellscape awaits us. This week, we will discuss fun activities you can do in your home/security bunker, such as knitting, or fashioning ammunition out of various metal objects you may have laying around *answers call from Jay* I’m being told that this will instead be another installment of Deep Impact, and also that things are pretty much the same as they were last week. For now, at least, it is still safe to go outside, but why do that when instead you can distract yourself from the horrifying state of our current political system by playing fantasy football! As we do every week, we’re looking at less than 10% owned players in the Yahoo game to scrounge for starts, and for once I actually held myself to my own threshold. Be proud of me, everyone!
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by: Dominic Hall
If you’re like me and you’re not into the current political talk, boy have I got a great read for you. I promise the most election-like references I’ll make in the entire post have to do with locker room politics. Instead, let me focus on the cause of what’s wrong with football lately, Roger Goodell. The man in the high castle seems to be too busy counting all the TV revenue money and player fines to worry about how bad ratings are. But don’t we, the public, deserve more from one of the most influential sports in America? I can’t be the only one eating member berries and thinking back to the good ole’ days. Remember when players were free to take cheerleader pom poms for a dance and pull out phones to call and tell their buds they scored? Hell, if Goodell is afraid of “sportsmanship” maybe he ought to implement a more stringent policy on performance enhancing drugs. You know, like the HGH policy that hasn’t caught a single player since the rule’s inception. Hopefully, we can make football great again someday soon and start the fun again. Till then, I guess dancing at home when your sketchy Flex play scores is going to have to do. I’ll do my part and give you a few names to help get you to that victory dance.
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by: Mike Honcho
I absolutely, positively do not want to start Week 10 this way. But, it has to be done. I’m going to suggest Jay Cutler and there’s nothing you can do about it. Sure, it may seem like I’m scraping the bottom of the barrel here, but trust me on this one. Mr. Cavallari has a sweet, sweet match up this week at Tampa Bay and we should all be excited to cash in on this opportunity. The Buccaneers are giving up 20.9 points fantasy points per game (5th most in the league) to opposing quarterbacks and Cutler put up a respectable 14.3 points in his Week 8 return against the Vikings. That’s pretty impressive, especially when you consider that Minnesota has faced four QBs inside the top-12 this season and they haven’t allowed a 20 point day to any of them. In fact they haven’t allowed 20 points to any of the eight QBs they faced this season. Meanwhile, the Buccaneers were torched by Derek Carr (35 points) and Matt Ryan (24.3) in back-to-back weeks. Now, I realize that Cutler isn’t on the Carr/Ryan level, but Tampa Bay is averaging 281 passing yards allowed per week and they’ve handed out 18 passing scores so far this season. Both those numbers rank 27th and 30th in the league respectively. There’s a “better than good” chance that Cutler will have to go to the air early and often to keep up with Jameis Winston and company. So taking a chance on the rocket-arm of the former Santa Claus, Indiana resident might be in your best interest this week.
Here’s a look at a few more of my favorite passing and rushing match ups for Week 10:
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by: MB
Welcome to the Razzball streamer article. It has certainly been a week of surprise and self-reflection for all of us. Whether you’re happy about the result of the election or not, it’s time for us to focus on things that we can change, our fantasy football lineups! The bye weeks continue to roll in/ and it’s been my job to help you with those fill-ins. I hope you have found my weekly findings helpful as I’ve been lucky enough nail at least two players per week lately, usually at least one quarterback and one defense. I was definitely disappointed that I missed out on the San Diego Chargers this past week though. (I overlooked Mariota’s turnover tendencies.) If I happen to overlook a player that you may like and I missed it, feel free to ask me in the comments section. Let’s get to this week’s plays…
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by: Son
There’s a monster down in Jacksonville. No, it’s name is not Blake Bortles. Although, Bortles’ play this year has been downright frightening. This monster that I speak of is 6′ 0″ 224 pounds and has dreads flowing out from underneath his helmet, very much like the tentacles of the Kraken reaching out to engulf a ship at sea. Instead of munching on ships in the ocean, though, this monster trucks helpless defenders and leaves them in his wake. Ladies and gentlemen, I’d like to introduce you to Chris Ivory of the Jacksonville Jaguars. Release the Kraken!
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by: Jay
| Period | Rank | QB | RB | WR | TE | K | DST |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Week 9 | 2 out of 133 | 2 | 20 | 76 | 14 | 33 | 18 |
| Week 8 | 46 out of 134 | 76 | 13 | 90 | 65 | 73 | 33 |
| Week 7 | 5 out of 138 | 58 | 2 | 36 | 30 | 22 | 56 |
| Week 6 | 92 out of 137 | 101 | 60 | 87 | 63 | 18 | 55 |
| Week 5 | 9 out of 138 | 42 | 32 | 4 | 112 | 56 | 12 |
| Week 4 | 5 out of 141 | 60 | 15 | 6 | 49 | 4 | 62 |
| Week 3 | 22 out of 139 | 41 | 18 | 62 | 21 | 7 | 32 |
| Week 2 | 96 out of 139 | 96 | 116 | 38 | 107 | 13 | 8 |
| Week 1 | 66 out of 138 | 63 | 73 | 34 | 116 | 32 | 23 |
| 2016 | 6 out of 136 | 44 | 7 | 10 | 37 | 8 | 10 |
| 3-year AVG | 20 out of 122 | 42 | 28 | 17 | 41 | 16 | 35 |
Razzball had another strong week of results, with Tehol doing really well with Quarterbacks, above average in Running Backs and Kickers, and Rudy with Pigskinator ended up nailing the best rankings for Russell Wilson and Mike Wallace and was first overall for tight ends. If there was any other time to do well, this is it with the playoffs coming up soon. Myself, Rudy, and Tehol all hope that Razzball can help take you to the championship, and we’re going to be doing our best to do so until the end of time. END. OF. TIME. Like Highlander. Without all the decapitation. Alright, enough of the generic (?) sales pitch, let’s get to your Week 10 Rankings!
Please, blog, may I have some more?As the title let slyly by, the election is over. Thank god it’s over. I mean, it’s really all over guys. Hope you didn’t love this world, because ohhhhh-ver. Kidding (MAYBE). I live in a blue state, am a “white-ish” male (half is enough!), that works from home, so a Trump Presidency doesn’t affect me. Add a few more shades of brown or a pu**y to grab, well then, the next four years might have been a bit different. And in the pod, we quickly give our take on what it all means maaaan, from a Clinton supporter (yes, I was with her), a luke-warmish Trump supporter (Unbreakable MB), and a Libertarian supporter (Tehol, because of course) who did the resting-Librarian, which is another way of saying he didn’t vote. After just a short six minutes of cordial discussion (that’s what she said), we quickly pivoted to talking football, going over San Diego’s voting no on their stadium referendum, what exactly is going on with the running back situations in Tampa Bay and Seattle, and what we can expect from Ty Montgomery and Dion Lewis going forward along with other topics. Jordan Howard was mentioned, I know that. And then we just kinda decide to stop talking, since Tehol and I aren’t fully caught up with Westworld. What can I say, we have the best endings… (A lot of people are saying it.)
Please, blog, may I have some more?Greetings! What. Just. Happened? Six months ago, I would have literally bet my life against five grand that Donald Trump had zero shot at being the Republican nominee. Two months ago, I would have bet every red cent I have that he could not defeat Hillary Clinton in this epic battle for USA supremacy. It became quite apparent to me how insanely wrong I was about the whole sitch, right about when Trump did Killary like Frank Dukes did Chong Li in Bloodsport. One can only receive so many consecutive roundhouse kicks to the grill piece before they fall to the mat in a bloody and bruised pile of raw hamburger meat and shart-stained drawls. This is honestly the hugest upset in the history of politics, or maybe the biggest upset of any kind. I’m talking about in the history of the world. I am beyond shocked. A few months ago, I would have said I’m appalled, but Hillary is so insanely unlikable that the fact she could have been the first woman to preside over the United States of America wasn’t even an interesting story. Her campaign became desperate, as she posted edited attack ads going at Trump, making her look petty and weak. Not only did Trump win, but the Republicans managed to still maintain control of both the house and the senate! PLEASE RID THIS NATION OF THE DEATH TAX! This money has already been taxed. What right does the government have to it? Again, this money has already been taxed. I don’t even understand how this is a real thing. But, truly, this Trump shizz is beyond nuts, but kudos to him for staying the course and pulling it out. Imagine how incredible it would feel to win the Presidency after countless celebrities and people like Warren Buffett and Mark Cuban blasted him non-stop. I must say, that that’s quite impressive. You simply cannot deny this. Yes, my goodmen, Donald J. Trump got the last laugh here…
I am Tehol Beddict, and this is Disgrace and Delight! Take heed!
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by: malamoney
Ladies and gentleman, America has played its Trump card. Just goes to show you just how much this country dislikes Hillary Clinton. They were willing to elect a man with no political experience over one with a lifetime. Good riddance Killary, and congratulations President Trump. You know what they say, every dog has its day. Well, here are my dogs. Speaking of dogs, has anyone gone to or plan to attend a Temple of the Dog show? If so, I’m jealous. While this might not be the best lineup I have presented, 172 points should be more than enough to bring home a win.
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by: mikeMaher
Welcome back, everyone. I apologize for missing last week, but I had a bunch of running around to do and was never able to settle down and hammer out the Week 9 Handcuff Report. Let’s just assume that I gave you great advice last week and that you’re back this week for more. Ok? Ok. Good. Great. Now, about those running backs.
The Oakland Raiders have been really fun to watch this year unless you have been trying to predict running back touches all year. While Latavius Murray was frustrating earlier in the year and then got hurt, but one thing he has done all year is find his way into the end zone. And in a week when a ton of people probably benched him because he was going up against the defense of the Denver Broncos, he decided to get into the end zone three times. Hopefully, you rolled the dice or were forced to start him because of bye weeks and injuries, but I know that many of you didn’t start him. I probably wouldn’t have.
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by: M@
I’m up in the woods, I’m down on my mind
I’m building a sill to slow down the time.
Bon Iver penned the words and performed it first, then Kanye West went and blewed it all up with a dope remix for his ‘Lost in the World’ track a few years ago. Now, when I’m in the woods, I’m not sure that I pull Chris Pine in Into The Woods like you see above (sorry for that?), but I know it’s definitely a place to reset your thoughts and re-aim your efforts.
Nine weeks into the fantasy football season we could all probably take a little trip up in the woods. Whether it’s readying yourself for a playoff push, climbing out of the middle…
Please, blog, may I have some more?
