Has any one set your gaze upon the mystifyingly glorious Great Pyramid of Giza? Perhaps you’ve often thought about, as I have, about dedicating your lives to attempt to discover the whereabouts of the remnants of the Ancient Gardens of Babylon? Indeed, we’ve all fantasized about having a magnificent statue erected of ourselves, such as the statue of Zeus at Olympia, where we shall ever be remembered for our celebrated conquests and remarkable achievements. Truly you, like me, Tehol Beddict, have ever fantasized about bending over some fair maiden in the Lighthouse of Alexandria, all the while marveling at the thunderous waves crash far below. If what I say is true, and you know it is, then you’ve more than likely often dreamt about the power and the glory that is none other than Julio Jones.

These are exciting times we live in, I tell you. For we are witnessing something not even the legendary Nostradamus could have predicted. The Great Wall of China is but a mere stack of worthless stone when compared to the imposing and striking figure that is Julio. The Taj Mahal is a pathetic shanty when placed next the radiant splendor that is Julio, and that is why he can’t be grouped in with these supposed great buildings that still stand to this day. NO!!! Julio truly belongs among the greatest creations this world has witnessed. He is a legendary being and he shall be treated as such. Yes, when I am old and grey, locked up in my office with nothing but my chicken and numerous wenches who bathe, clothe, and feed me, writing the history of our lifetimes, there will be numerous chapters dedicated to the prodigiousness of the famed and wondrous figure that was Julio Jones and how he became the 8th Wonder of the World. Yes, after the Elder Gods have placed me in my rightful position as this worlds foremost historian, children will sing the tales of the noble Julio for all of eternity. WITNESS!

 

Players Who Delighted

C.J. AndersonI have little doubt left within me that Anderson is the answer at running back Denver has seemingly scoured the earth for. It’s an absolute shame they drafted Monte Ball in the 2nd round of the NFL Draft, only to have an undrafted free agent out of LANEY COLLEGE show he’s, by far, the superior back. Ronnie Hillman could and should be a decent change of pace back in the future, but honestly he’s needed about as much as another De Niro turn in Rocky and Bullwinkle follow up. 3 TD’s were scored by “Ceej” last week, as he continues his attempts at becoming the next Terrell Davis.

Le’Veon Bell – A few months back, when I said that Bell was the best running back in the NFL, some of you people scoffed. Some of you questioned my sanity as well as my manhood. Others have named me the chosen Prophet of modern civilization. Choose your side.

The Seattle SeahawksNot since the prolific leadership of Genghis Khan have we seen a man such as Pete Carroll. We are now witnessing the modern age Mongol Empire in the Seattle Seahawks, and I hope you all will continue to enjoy the show because there’s nothing ANYONE can do to stop it. Witness.

Non NFL Delight

The First Law Trilogy – I’m almost ashamed to admit I just now discovered British author Joe Abercrombie and this incredible tale. There’s nothing I love more than bing watching a TV show I came upon late, other than of course binge reading an epic book series. No waiting around for the next one to come out. No excuses or pushbacks of release dates. If you say one thing for Tehol Beddict, he’s impatient. Seriously, this man may have written classics superior to those of George R. R. Martin. You may know I’m a fan of his from my many Game of Thrones themed fantasy baseball posts (prepare yourself, winter and fantasy baseball are coming), but Abercrombie may have bested him here. Head down to your local library and swoop these books up, ASAP.

 

Players Who Disgraced

Giovanni Bernard – I hate to ask this for it hurts me, but has young Giovanni become the Christian Slater of fantasy football, only over a much shorter time period? I mean, at least Slater gave us Will Scarlett and the criminally underrated Hard Rain (am I the only person who loves that film?).  Bernard hasn’t given us much but a few weeks of solid play before going down to injury and now being behind rookie, Jeremy Hill, on the depth chart. Last week’s numbers were the definition of a disgrace, and I’d certainly be nervous about starting him going forward.

Ryan TannehillR.T.’s ability to throw the ball down the field continues to be peasant-like, and to not be able to go long on what is one of the most pathetic secondaries is downright inexcusable. I have ZERO faith in Tannehill becoming an elite or Super Bowl winning quarterback. He’s the Mark Ruffalo of NFL quarterbacks, and by that, I mean that he is nowhere CLOSE to carrying a team to anything I’d like to watch.

Josh Gordon2 receptions for 15 yards with Vontae Davis injured and missing the game? Thanks for showing up in the fantasy playoffs for those poor souls who kept you rostered the entire season, only for you to choke, and ending all purpose in their lives. Seriously, Gordo, you let us down more than this new Terminator trailer. Thanks for nothing.

Peyton Manning – This one has to sting worse than a horrific case of the clap. Countless Manning owners went down in flames this past week, owners will more than likely NEVER eat Papa John’s pizza ever again. It’s not that good anyways… Seriously though, what an epic disgrace. I’ll sacrifice three goats to the Elder Gods in honor of all my fallen soldiers who trudged into battle with who they thought was their glorious leader.

Betting With Beddict TNF Pick: Rams (-4.5) – This seems like too many points, but the bloodthirsty Rams are playing as well as anyone in football right now and the Cardinals are hanging on by a very thin thread. Tough call, but it has to be made nonetheless. See the rest of my picks on my Saturday column.,,

 

Thank you kindly for joining for another edition of Disgrace/Delight. It has been an utmost honor being with you during what was no doubt another epic NFL season. For those of you who were put down like a rabid dog, there’s always next year. You can’t win them all. You have to be realistic about these things. But for those of you still moving forward for glories that shall live on in memory for all of existence, I ride with you another week. Victory is within your grasp. Take it!!! Can’t get enough Beddict? Follow him on Twitter at @Tehol134. You have to be realistic about these things

  1. Allan says:
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    Tehol rams d or lions d?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Allan: Im all in on the Rams right now

  2. Jake the snake says:
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    Howdy man; which one would you add for this week/ depth / block my opponent for getting & using any of these:

    James starks (opponent has Lacy), kamar Aiken (one other team in playoffs in has torrey smith & another has steve smith), derek hagan, Allen hurns (however I do have Marqise lee), gerhart

    Also who to drop for any of those; I’m kinda leaning Aiken or starks, garcon, wheaton or Flacco my main QB is brady

    • Steve Stevenson says:
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      @Jake the snake: I’d grab Starks first, then maybe Aiken. Can drop any of those guys, I guess Wheaton and Flacco first. But def grab Starks. I just dropped my backup QB for him just to keep my opp from having another RB option.

      • Tehol Beddict says:
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        @Steve Stevenson: yea feel free to drop Wheaton whenever you feel like it bro. dude is worthless. Flacco the same

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Jake the snake: has to be Starks or aiken. Those are other guys are dog piss. Aiken could have nice week but obviously need to know what’s up with Lacy. Or maybe just hit up garçon against weak secondary

  3. Brian says:
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    If Eddie lacy sits would you play Starks over Stills ?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Brian: mos def, B. Mos def. Easy call. Starks would have nice game

  4. STL says:
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    Would you still go Rams over Ravens D? Arizona doesn’t turn the ball over much.

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @STL: I’m all over the Rams defense right now. No way I’m sitting them. Stanton is terrible

  5. BraunWeasleys says:
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    Well Tehol, I don’t know how i’m going to pull this off but Im praying to the elder gods….

    I’m playing my buddy in the semi finals in a 16TEAM LEAGUE

    And he has. My team

    Qb:manziel. Rivers
    Rb: lesean. J Bell
    Rb Leveon bell. Mathews
    Wr: benjamin. Demariyous
    Wr: gordon. Jeffrey
    Te: dwayne allen. Kelce
    Flex: beckam jr. Keenan Allen
    K: barth. Carpenter
    D: NYG vs Was. KC vs Oak

    He clearly has a better team and Im going to need some huge lines. I have Cameron on my bench, would he have more upside than Kelce? KC will kill Oakland and run even more than usual and I wont be surpised if Alex Smith throws under 20 times.

    Also, if Lacy misses the game, would you start Starks over mathews? Mathews has a tough matchup against denver.

    And to make things better, I own OBJ, leveon Bell and Lesean in my other semi finals league:) Im screwed!

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @BraunWeasleys: B-weeeeezy! What up dog. glad you’re one of the last standing, tho, I knew that you would be. I suppose he has more upside than Kelce. Oakland may surprise you and play tough bruh. he has a better team than this???? Starks over matthews if lacy out, sure. but not if otherwise. Im confused if that’s your team up above or who you’re going against. Both teams are stacked up and racked up. oh I get it. you’re the team on the right. You good to go. You’re totally fine and have great shot at wining. Id go Kelce tho

      • BraunWeasleys says:
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        @Tehol Beddict:

        Haha yeah when It there was space between them but they got bunched up. Yeah i’m on the right! I was feeling Kelce and you are too, i’ll take the gamble

        • LT Murray IV

          Tehol Beddict says:
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          @BraunWeasleys: cameron too risky at this point. especially with Johnny starting

  6. Julio White says:
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    do you even read through the shit you write? monkeys banging away on typewriters make more sense and fewer mistakes than you do. what a mess.

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Julio White: not really, no. I just let it flow like the Nile River. You should try it and see what u out down. I’d imagine it would be stuff like ” I suck at life” or ” good god I’m a worthless piece of gutter trash.” But hey, you never know.

      • julio white says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: “players who delighted disgraced”????? you dummy. always doing your best to ruin razzball with your shit advice and lack of attention to detail. do better, tranny-porn. for the love of god.

        • Tehol Beddict says:
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          @julio white: why don’t u write for razzball? Oh that’s right, you’re a fukin tool. See you next week. thanks for reading

          • julio white says:
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            @Tehol Beddict: awwwww. don’t get angry. just get better.

            • LT Murray IV

              Tehol Beddict says:
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              @julio white: that is my goal on a daily basis. as always, I hope you approve of my next pose. I live to please you, Julio

  7. Steve Stevenson says:
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    First Law was good stuff, Tehol.

    Fortunately my team with Peyton had a 1st round bye. Hoping he comes out pissed and looking to make a point this week.

    Couple flex decisions: 1) 0.5 ppr, start Mason tonight or hold off and go with either Hill or Roddy this weekend? 2) std scoring, Crowell, Hill or Roddy?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Steve Stevenson: Roddy is not a trustworthy play by any means right now. Arizona has now been gasped by run a couple weeks in a row so I like Mason. Crowell for second question tho I’ve been hearing hill should get more carries this week

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Steve Stevenson: IM SO SORRY!!! I will pray for you. you can still pull this out if you started Mason. That was an all around pathetic performance by the Rams.

  8. goodfold2 says:
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    now 78-56-3 after my best week last week, 11-3-1. STL -4.5. i would think gordon’s stats were way more hoyer’s fault than his own.

    • goodfold2 says:
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      @goodfold2: go back to making playing cards, ya bum!

      • LT Murray IV

        Tehol Beddict says:
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        @goodfold2: who’s making playing cards? LOL

        • goodfold2 says:
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          @Tehol Beddict: for some reason i was thinking there is a playing card company named hoyer. i may be wrong about that.

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @goodfold2: 11-3-1??? You’re a legend!!! yea, Hoyer is trash. I just had to talk about someone who had fantasy relevance.

  9. Ahowe says:
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    Peyton @SD or Ryan vs. the Steelers? Gun shy after last week.

    • LT Murray IV

      Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Ahowe: gun shy with Peyton/????? never doubt the God. Trust me.

      • Ahowe says:
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        @Tehol Beddict: He’s had some playoff killing games week 15/16 over the last few years it seems

        • Tehol Beddict says:
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          @Ahowe: Ryan is also a great matchup but Peyton should be fine. I think you’ll be pleased either way but I wouldn’t bench Peyton, personally

  10. Ray Stanz says:
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    Need to pick two out of four for Gordon, Allen, L.Murray and Crowell. What say you?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Ray Stanz: thats an extremely tough call, Ray Day. I love em all like sons. Gordo and Crowell would be my choices but since they on same team id maybe switch it to Gordon and Murray who I like to gash KC as they usually get annihilated by the run.

  11. Frank White says:
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    Wutup Nuka How was your Thanksgivng!!?? Well Cam is out so who you like, Manziel, Fitzpatrick or McCown?? Manziel got a healthy Cameron n Gordon

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Frank White: kick in the door, wave in the 4-4. ALl you heard was Frankie don’t hurt us no more. whaaaaaat up. Thanksgiving was excellent and I hope yours was as well.
      Im going JOhhny be good in that situation. Manziel for the win. you got this, iiiiid

      • Frank White says:
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        I’m a lover not a fighter, I can’t find my lighter!!! Weezy Yes!! Thnx Brotha Tehol

        • Tehol Beddict says:
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          @Frank White: you got it pimpiiiin

  12. Scott says:
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    The First Law Trilogy
    Truly you are great, to have lauded a work such as this.
    Glokta is by far my favorite character of any book, yes, even over Tyrion the Imp.

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Scott: Glokta!!!! An all time legend. probably my favorite as well. I would kill for another book that continues main character stories from those.

  13. Clint says:
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    So should I wait out this Julio thing until Sunday or just go w/the aforementioned greatness that is CJ Anderson for my ppr flex this weekend Tehol?

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Clint: Just wait it out. You will know SUnday morning. If Julio is good to go, I think thats the call but Anderson is the far safer play at this moment in time, so that’s ok too. You can’t lose. you were born to win

  14. Bugeater says:
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    No mention of the Colossus of Rhodes/Jones? RB2 and flex (.5 PPR) out of J. Hill, J. Stewart (like the Phoenix, he appears to have risen from the ashes) and K. Stills. Keep up the good work and thanks.

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Bugeater: @Ahowe: To gaze upon the Colossus of Rhodes would be a dream come true. If only they’d rebuild it, eh? Id probably go Hill and hopefully we can trust Hugh Jackson saying Hill’s going to get bulk of the carries but who knows. Stills isn’t on my radar here between the 3. J. Stew should be in line for solid game also with more upside if you want to go that route

      real tough calls here.

  15. Timbo Slice says:
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    This is going to be super annoying for you, but I needs some help son! Having a difficult time finalizing my lineup for this week, at WR/RB/Flex.

    It’s a .5 PPR league. Start 2 RBs, 2 WRs and 1 Flex.

    RBs: McCoy (obvious), Hill, FJax
    WRs: Jordy (obvious), Benjamin, Gordon, Roddy

    What do you think the ideal lineup is (5 players)?

    Not sure I can trust Gordon this week with Manziel, and Derek Anderson will be throwing Benjamin the ball. The Bills project to be down and will likely throw a lot to Fjax. Also, if Julio sits Roddy gets a big upgrade? Let me know what you think when you have a moment – thanks in advance mate.

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Timbo Slice: annoyance???? NEVER.yea I’m with f reddy jack this week. We don’t know if Hill is actually going to get a ton of carries like they say. I would still go Gordon for sure. I think Julio will try and tough it out. Hopefully for me anyway.may the Gods be with you and let me know if you have any further need of assistance

  16. Nick says:
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    Hey Tehol, I’m benching Rashad for Latavius Murray due to the recent news of a hot-hand approach, agreed? Also go Keenan Allen or Martavis Bryant at WR3? Thanks man

    • Nick says:
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      @Nick:standard league

    • Tehol Beddict says:
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      @Nick: yep I’m riding Murray like a stallion this week. Kansas City run d is trash. Good call. I’d lean Bryant just because good corners tend to lock down allen

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