Donkey Teeth

Jefferson Moves On Up

September 28, 2020 | 2020 Fantasy Football, Fantasy Football Daily Notes | 33 Comments

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It’s week three of the NFL season and you know what that means: annoying pumpkin latte commercials, my crazy neighbor putting up Christmas lights and your entire fantasy football team’s hurt. Trust me, I feel your pain. I had to start the dog from Air Bud in several leagues this week; and he was my top scoring player in all of those leagues except one. That’s only because I was forced to start Vikings rookie wide receiver Justin Jefferson on my Scott Fish Bowl team and he exploded for 7 catches for 175 yards and his 1st career touchdown. Jefferson single handedly put my whole stupid injured team on his back (don’t worry, they were wearing masks) and carried us to a week 3 victory. The Vikes’ youngster is owned in only 30% of Yahoo leagues and while there’s bound to be ups and downs, like with any rookie, Jefferson could turn out to be last year’s A.J. Brown. If you need receiving help, add him now and see if he can make a habit of these big performances. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy football:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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MB

Week 3 Sunday Fantasy Football Primer

September 27, 2020 | Fantasy Football Gameday, Fantasy Football Strategy | 32 Comments

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It’s starting to feel more like football season, eh? The SEC is back, the Big 12 is playing in conference games, and the Big Ten is now under a month away from football. If that’s not enough for you, the NFL is sizzling through two weeks and we are on to week 3. I have far fewer complaints about the level of play than I thought I would and I am thrilled about it. Do you all remember the first weeks of the officiating strike a few years back? Do you remember how watching football wasn’t nearly as enjoyable as a result? That is sort of what I was expecting, but here we are. The quality of play is fine, our star players are dynamic. The injury bug was bad last week, but if 2020 has taught us anything; if there is a sliver of hope for normalcy, you just have to embrace it. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?
everywhereblair

Razzbowl Reflections: Week 2

September 25, 2020 | 2020 Fantasy Football, RazzBowl |

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Excuse me, everybody, I’m a bit tired from spending the last week pitching the Razzbowl to the Shark Tank investors. See, I thought we had such a good program here — the best ball, the FAAB, the community — that we could turn this [waves hands around frantically] from the world’s biggest free Pros-V-Joes best ball tournament into a lucrative side-business. Then, Mark Cuban started talking about some team he owns, and I started talking about how I drafted Joe Mixon and Leonard Fournette, and then he started saying something about inexperience and over-my-head, and then I took my prop football and I threw it right over his head. Turns out, if you attack a billionaire, there’s a group of people who start following you, but not in a Korean boy-band kind of way. 

So while I write this from the rest stop in eastern Kentucky eluding the finest private security vans that Cuban could hire, I trust that y’all will learn from my mistakes and do a Kickstarter in the future. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Donkey Teeth

Miami Offense & Defense Give Jacksonville Fitz

September 25, 2020 | 2020 Fantasy Football, Fantasy Football Daily Notes | 57 Comments

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It’s the age old question. Pondered by all the great philosophers for millennia. Debated by all great leaders and all feared dictators since the beginning of time. Beard or mustache? Abe Lincoln or Tom Selleck? Grizzly Adams or Groucho Marx? Gandalf or Ron Swanson? Merlin or Ron Burgundy? This enigmatic dispute has built for ages with no sign of a clear answer. That is, until Thursday night’s legendary culmination of Ryan Fitzpatrick vs. Gardner Minshew: a Beard vs. Mustache rumpus to rule them all. And it was nothing but beard in this one as Ryan Fitzpatrick flashed his facial prowess at a clip of 18/20 for 160 yards, 7 carries for 38 yards and 2 passing touchdowns—he now has 4 touchdowns on the season. The virtual fan chants for Tua and his baby face goatee will have to wait another week.  Many will question whether this was a valid win for the beard crowd, citing the illegal use of Fitzmagic in this contest—and rightfully so. Unfortunately, we may never have a definitive answer to the greatest question in the history of mankind. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday for fantasy football:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
MB

Start/Sit Week 3: Kelley Will Go KaPOWski Against Carolina

September 24, 2020 | Fantasy Football Strategy, Start/Sit | 53 Comments

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So far I have enjoyed the challenge of putting out a weekly start/sit article. A lot of these are foreshadowed in my weekly rankings (13th in accuracy for FantasyPros last week)! But also, writing this column has helped me take a closer look at my rankings the day after I publish them and it makes me notice that what I put out on Wednesday is far from a finished product. If you use my rankings, be sure to check back on Sunday because they will look a lot different. I love gambling on football. I’ve been doing it for years and I still have a roof over my head so I guess it’s not going too bad. I do a lot of digging from Thursday-Saturday when looking at game lines and totals and it helps find the errors in my ways from a fantasy aspect earlier in the week. If you’d like a second opinion on my start and sit options, be sure to check out Rudy’s projections each week! Now would be as good as a time as any to use that 7-day free trial. Let’s get to the plays for week 3. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?
B_Don

Rest of Season Top 25 Tight End Rankings

September 24, 2020 | Rest of Season Rankings, Top 25 TE Rankings | 2 Comments

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The Elites

Set it and forget it. These are the TEs I’d be trading for if you don’t want to just live the stream at TE. 

  • George Kittle may not play this week due to lingering injury concerns plus MetLife field concerns. Even missing another week, I’d still take him as my #2 TE for the rest of the season. 
  • Darren Waller gets the official bump to the elites after 16 targets in week 2. 12 receptions on 16 targets, *moving on up…*.
  • Of course, 1 week after I put Mark Andrews into the top tier, he disappoints, but last year’s track record and his connection with LJax keep him here for now. 
    • Please, blog, may I have some more?
Aaron Pags

Teasers and Pleasers: Week 3 Best Bets

September 24, 2020 | NFL Gambling | 3 Comments

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Welcome to Razzball’s dedicated gambling column-Teasers and Pleasers! Each Thursday during the NFL season, at 11:00 am EST, TnP will post our top bets for the upcoming week. Just sit back and win some money with us in 2020.

How do bands come up with their names? Steely Dan is famously named after a giant steam-powered dildo, but others aren’t quite as artistic. English rock band, Chumbawamba, is just gibberish according to their official statements. However, if you are searching for an innovative way to intro NFL picks for Week 3, you dig a little further and find it came from a dream. Band member Danbert Nobacon had a dream about peeing, and the signs on the club door restrooms he dreamt about replaced “Men” and “Women” with “Chumba” and “Wamba.” We got knocked down last week (0-4 ATS), but we get back up again…

Turn up the volume on your Walkman because it’s Week 3 of the NFL season. We have a chart-topper ourselves, Rudy Gamble’s Razzball Membership Tools! Be sure to check them out and the FREE 7-day trial of all the tools you need to be an international sensation.

Now let’s get to it! Week 3 picks for your Tubthumping pleasure.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
JB Barry

Sexy Flexies, Week 3: A Thursday Night Special

September 24, 2020 | 2020 Fantasy Football, Fantasy Football Strategy | 15 Comments

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Week 2 was brutal for a lot of fantasy managers with the injury bug biting some of the biggest names in football. In addition to Michael Thomas already being out, we saw Saquan Barkley lost for the season and Christian McCaffrey sent to the IR with an ankle injury. There’s no replacing players of this magnitude, but if you drafted well, you have guys who can move up your fantasy depth chart and into those starting positions. More than ever now, if you’re dealing with injuries and moving former flex players into starting roles, it is going to be important to find productive players to put in your flex spots.

As you know, every Thursday here on Razzball, I will be posting the weeks “Sexy Flexies” to give you a couple of players to consider starting in your flex spot. The objective isn’t to point out the obvious guys you’re starting in your RB or WR slots, but to take a look at a couple of players who are a bit more under the radar. These will likely be guys that you won’t start every week but will be good rotational pieces in the flex spot of your lineup based on matchup and opportunity.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Donkey Teeth

Week 3 Fantasy Football Rankings: Donkey Teeth

September 24, 2020 | 2020 Fantasy Football, Weekly Rankings | 105 Comments

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I just snuck out of a court ordered gambling rehab facility to write this post, so I’ll have to be brief. After I was arrested for stealing old ladies’ purses from the retirement home down the block to fund my string of Arizona Cardinals’ Super Bowl wagers (a 50:1 lock!), the judge sentenced me to 6 month’s of in-patient rehab. Since I’ll be releasing my weekly fantasy football rankings each Thursday morning for the duration of the season, I’ve decided to throw in some bonus bold Thursday Night Football predictions along with my expertly handicapped pick for the contest:

Miami Dolphins (+3) at Jacksonville Jaguars

Forecast: Dolphins at Jaguars, Fitzmagic at Minshew Magic, beard at moustache, it doesn’t get much better than this folks! Obviously this game will be all about Uncle Rico Minshew. His swag will cast a shadow so big on Thursday night that no other player will even be seen other than maybe Saucy Boi Preston Williams—who happens to be my favorite buy-low wide receiver target following weeks 1 and 2. But back to Minshew Mania: the Jock Strap King will arrive at the stadium 10 minutes before game time wearing nothing but a leopard print jock. Without any stretching or warm up throws, the mustachio’d one with lead the Jaguars on a 69 yard touchdown drive on the opening series. It’ll be all mustache from there except for a series he’ll take off after halftime while recording a track for his new album—see below. So jump on that sweet stache and ride it all the way to a Thursday night victory!

Please, blog, may I have some more?
al_FF_red

Rest of Season Top 80 WRs: Week 3

September 23, 2020 | 2020 Fantasy Football, Rest of Season Rankings, Top 80 WR Rankings | 26 Comments

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Your WR top 80 4.0 is here! Now we have some real live NFL data to help make adjustments. Some players were removed due to injury or ineffectiveness, and some new faces have forced their way onto the scene.

This list is not league or format specific, but it is based on 2020 projection only. When thinking through tiers and rankings I asked myself simply – “all things considered who would I rather have on my roster?”

Please, blog, may I have some more?