LOGIN

We’ve done it. The final week of the 2023-24 fantasy football season is upon us, but for most of you, your league has already wrapped up and crowned a champion. If that was you, congratulations! If you came up short, good try! If you failed to make the postseason, boo! And if you placed dead last, fire up that hot needle, and let’s get that “I’m a Loser” buttcheek tattoo underway! *farting noise* However, if you are still competing, we’re here to assist with your weekly start vs. sit needs. There might be a championship on the line or a last-place punishment you’re desperately hoping to avoid. So, without further ado, let’s get into the analysis of names like Trevor Lawrence, Tua Tagovailoa, Najee Harris, and more. Week 18 start vs. sit begins right now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Enough, already! Can we PLEASE stop trying to make Justin Fields a thing in fantasy football? What are we doing!? I’m done with the cutesy little introductions and self-deprecating jokes. It’s time to take a stand. I don’t care if he runs, throws, flies, digs underground and shoots lasers out of his eyes! The Chicago Bears offense isn’t worth it. Fantasy football playoffs are here, for Booger McFarland’s sake! Some of us need to get our heads out of our buttcracks, unless you’re still trying to figure out the best place for that last place finisher tattoo you’re about to be forced into getting. 

So, let’s get to it and fire up those decisions. This week, we’ll touch on Geno Smith, Austin Ekeler, Gus Edwards, Garrett Wilson and more. But if you don’t see your player of interest, hit me up in the comments. Week 16 start vs. sit begins right now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It’s fantasy POSTSEASON, y’all! Here’s to ensuring your playoff run continues into next week and the week thereafter and beyond, until you’re a 2023 fantasy football champion. Either that, or you’re competing to avoid the toilet bowel, last place and effectively being forced into having the league winner’s grandmother’s likeness tattooed onto your right buttcheek. Or your left. Or both. Or maybe you have to play frogger in four-lane traffic for an hour. I have no way of knowing how sick in the head your leaguemates are. All I can do is help you from becoming Main Street roadkill or having Grandma Elsa’s face stenciled onto your backside.

So let’s get to it and fire up those decisions. This week, we’ll touch on Justin Fields, D’Andre Swift, James Cook, Calvin Ridley and more. But if you don’t see your player of interest, hit me up in the comments. Week 15 start vs. sit begins right now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It’s all coming down to the wire, so don’t look down now! As we enter Week 14, you’re either sitting comfortably with a playoff spot in hand, battling tooth and nail to get in, enjoying the luxury of a bye, hyped for playoff fantasy football, or eliminated with no hopes of emerging from the grave. That’s a lot of potential options. Even more than I thought when I started typing. Hopefully, you’re not in situation No. 5, or else reading these very words is likely a complete waste of your time and you need to get back to fulfilling that TPS Report your boss asked about on Monday. Or possibly, you just love fantasy football so much you couldn’t possibly flick off the switch, no matter the circumstances. But regardless if you’re weathering the storm or your entire livelihood is on the line, we’ve got your start vs. sit advice right here. And if you don’t see the player you’re looking for, hit up the comments section, and let’s chat. Week 14 start vs. sit begins right now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Come here, come all. I have a tale I would like to share with you. I have a dear, dear friend named Nicholas who is a Buffalo Bills fan, and currently lives in a furious state of ceaseless agony. Not because he’s from New Jersey, no. But because he now watches all Bills games alone at home, in the dark, covered in a thick, wool blanket while clutching a sofa cushion desperately across his breast. “I’m in a bad place right now,” he says to me more than on occasion. And unfortunately, matters have only worsened since we last encountered, dear Razzballers. Alas, my dear friend finds himself in the midst of a full-on frenzy, which has only clouded his ability to adequately manage his fantasy roster. In Week 10, he inadvertently left Tee Higgins at Flex in the heat of a ruthless playoff race. It’s mid-November. We’ve reached that point where frustrations, or even concentrations, may be coming to a boiling point, either in regard to your NFL team or your fantasy roster. If you’re 2-8, chances are your playoff hopes are over. But please, please, do not be a New Jersey Nicholas. Do not allow your desperation as a fan to impact your attention-to-detail as an owner. And with a little bit of extra analysis from this week’s column, you could be sitting purdy (which I reccomend in the column) on Sunday. Week 11 start vs. sit begins right now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

An aerospace engineer in Minneapolis, a fallen franchise signal-caller in Phoenix, and a young acronym finding stride in Seattle find themselves in the spotlight of our start vs. sit column this week. Luckily for the former, he has a sturdy career to fall back on if things go south in the cold tundra of America. The same can’t be said for me. If this gig doesn’t work out, my only fallback is an open invitation extending back to 1996 to join the Chuck-E-Cheese band. And let me tell you, if you haven’t seen Five Nights at Freddy’s yet, the prospects of that endeavor are not enticing to me. But what about our beloved aerospace engineer and his friends? We’ll take a look at the fates of Joshua Dobbs, Kyler Murray, and Jaxon Smith-Njigba, as well as some unique calls at tight end. Week 10 start vs. sit begins right now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Our trek through November football begins with the arrival of Week 9. Join me, dear Razzballers, on the lovely Mayflower as we voyage across the ocean in search of greener pastures and kinder kings. Perhaps if your season hasn’t gone as planned, you instead find yourself sailing behind us in the Nina, Pinta, or Santa Maria as you chase your fellow league-mates for playoff spots. And if the season has truly been a disaster, you may have already died of scurvy, pneumonia, or tuberculosis before we left the port. Indeed, the campaign’s midpoint is looming, and the decisions that lie ahead could be the ones that make or break your pursuit of a championship. This week, we’ll touch on 10 players in particular including bold opinions on Derek Carr, Emari Demercado, and DK Metcalf. Week 9 start vs. sit begins right now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Week 3. Two down, 16 to go. With multiple games now in the books, we can finally begin dissecting trends as they emerge across the league. For starters, one trend that I’ve noticed is more and more male youths wearing tiny shorts to show off their thigh muscles. Another is the rapid rise of the streaming of Suits on Netflix. What does this have to do with fantasy football? Well, every NFL player has large thigh muscles and regularly wears a suit (probably). But not all players with large thigh muscles who wear suits are created equally. Some are better at football than others, and some are better equipped to help your Week 3 fantasy lineup, such as Russell Wilson and Gabe Davis. Who else? I’ll break that down and more in this week’s start vs. sit.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

To start, or to sit? That is the question. Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageously bad fantasy decisions, or to take arms against a sea of injury woes and clouded matchups, and by further educating oneself, end them. To lose—to writhe in anger, no more. Indeed, that is the question. To start Anthony Richardson in his NFL debut, or have him ride the pine. Do you roll with Breece Hall at home against Buffalo in Week 1, or wait and see how the Jets backfield shakes out? To start, or to sit. To sit, or to start. In some aspects of life, it is essential to sit before you start. Such is the case with the words before you. Take a seat, fire up that roster, and start reading. Week 1 start vs. sit begins now. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?