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What a weekend! Masters Sunday in November due to pandemic scheduling. College football hanging on by a thread with virus outbreaks and cancelled games. But the NFL? No worries, mon. It was a light news cycle this week with lots of wind and weather, but one man had the gall to go off.  Wayne Gallman toted 18 carries for 53 yards, caught 1 pass for 7 yards and hit pay dirt for his 4th and 5th touchdowns. Wayne Enterprises’ stock spiked this past week when Devonta Freeman (hamstring) was placed on the IR. Somehow Gallman’s only owned in 50% of Yahoo leagues. Most of those leagues are probably abandoned but make sure yours isn’t one of them. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday for fantasy football:

HOU at CLE

Duke Johnson – 14 carries for 54 yards. The Duke of Johnsonville forgot he was supposed to be ruling Johnsonville the next three weeks with David Johnson (concussion) on the IR.

Will Fuller – 5 catches for 38 yards. The touchdown streak ends at six. There were 50 mph wind gusts in Cleveland Sunday so don’t read to much into any of the stats from this game, including the mediocre performance from Deshaun Watson (20/30 for 163 yards, 8 carries for 36 yards and his 18th passing touchdown).

Nick Chubb – 19 carries for 126 yards and his 5th touchdown. I haven’t seen Chubb for weeks, but that’s more of a personal problem. Chubb had a walk in touchdown late in the 4th but instead ran out of bounds to ice the game. DONKEY ANGRY!!

Kareem Hunt – 19 carries for 104 yards, 3 catches for 28 yards. That dog can hunt even when he has that big Chubb weighing him down.

Jarvis Landry – 3 catches for 29 yards. Everyone knows Sunday is Landry day. How come nobody told Jarvis? Pandemic laundry day has gotten a lot easier since that I only wear one shirt a week and never any pants.

 

WAS at DET

Antonio Gibson – 13 carries for 45 yards, 4 catches for 20 yards and his 6th and 7th touchdowns. Best performance from an Antonio since The Mask of Zorro. Gibson remains a solid RB2 in spite of the vulturing J.D. McKissic (8 carries for 6 yards, 7 catches for 43 yards and his 1st touchdown).

Terry McLaurin – 7 catches for 95 yards, 1 carry for 27 yards. Best performance from a Terry since every performance by Terry Tate: Office Linebacker. Pigskinonator projected McLauren as it’s #3 fantasy wide receiver this week, good bot!

D’Andre Swift – 16 carries for 81 yards, 5 catches for 68 yards and his 6th touchdown. Best performance from a D’Andre since Swift’s two TD game a few weeks back. Are there any other mainstream D’Andres? The best news for Swift owners is that Adrian Peterson only saw 4 carries for 21 yards. Patricia is really trying to lure us back in, are you biting?

Marvin Jones Jr. – 8 catches for 96 yards and his 6th touchdown. Best performance from a Marvin since Martian balled out in Space Jam. Speaking of Space Jam sign up now for RazzJam—our large Pros vs. Joes fantasy basketball contest.

T.J. Hockenson – 2 catches for 13 yards. Worst performance from a T.J. since the Jerk Algorithm episode of Silicon Valley. This was not optimal tip-to-tip efficiency. Hock is an every week TE1, we knew he was touchdown dependent like all tight ends not named Kelce or Waller.

 

JAC at GB

James Robinson – 23 carries for 109 yards, 2 catches for 3 yards. It’d be interesting to see what percentage of fantasy teams make the playoffs this year when Jim Bob is on the roster. A free first round player goes a long ways. 

D.J. Chark – 4 catches for 56 yards. The Charknado winds were calm again this week but part of that can be attributed to the crazy winds up in Green Bay.

Aaron Jones – 13 carries for 46 yards, 5 catches for 49 yards. A decent return for Mr. Jones but worth noting that Jamaal Williams still took 8 carries for 30 yards and 3 catches for 25 yards. It’s still to be seen whether the Packers were just easing Jones back in or whether Williams has earned himself a bigger share of the workload moving forward.

Davante Adams – 8 catches for 66 yards and his 9th touchdown. Adams left briefly with an ankle injury but this guy is a machine and his robotic ankles were easily repaired. He’s the #1 fantasy wide receiver and I still don’t think it’s all that close.

Marquez Valdes-Scantling – 4 catches for 149 yards and his 4th touchdown, Marquez Unrealius is one of the great philosophers of our age but from time to time he’ll also catch long touchdowns from Aaron Rodgers (24/34 for 325 yards, 3 carries for 4 yards, 2 passing touchdowns, 1 rushing touchdown and 1 interception–he now has 26 touchdowns on the year).

 

PHI at NYG

Miles Sanders – 15 carries for 85 yards, 2 catches for 10 yards and a 2pt conversion. I’ve been waiting to see Sanders back on the field for so long I forgot what he looked like. Ahhhh he’s beautiful!

Jalen Reagor – 4 catches for 47 yards as he led the team with 7 targets. Reagor of House Targaryen walked into the fire with early season injuries and emerged from the flames as the Eagles top receiving option. A big breakout is coming, make sure he’s owned in your league.

Travis Fulgham – 1 catch for 8 yards. The honeymoon is over and Carson Wentz (21/37 for 208 yards, no touchdowns and no interceptions) is already cheating on Fulgham with Reagor. Who can blame him, Reagor is sexy, sexy.

Dallas Goedert – 4 catches for 33 yards. We’re still Waiting for Goedert.

Evan Engram – 2 catches for 15 yards. Double E Cup didn’t have a very busty performance against the Eagles.

 

TB at CAR

Tom Brady – 28/39 for 341 yards, 2 carries for 2 yards, 3 passing touchdowns and 1 rushing touchdown–he now has 23 passing touchdowns on the season. After the stinker Monday night I told you to start all your Buccaneers for the patented Brady FU bounce back. There you have it.

Leonard Fournette – 8 carries for 19 yards, 2 catches for 11 yards. Alright, so there was one Buccaneer you didn’t want to start this week. Better games ahead for Leo.

Ronald Jones – 23 for 192 yards, 1 catch for 6 yards and his 5th touchdown. I thought Leo would be the one playing Catch Me If You Can, but it was RoJo who busted off a 98 yard TD run which probably got him out to of the dog house after another fumble lost. 

Chris Godwin – 6 catches for 92 yards. The Godwiener was looking phallic in this one. He’s a WR1 rest of season.

Mike Evans – 6 catches for 77 yards and his 8th touchdown. Mike Evans’ Sausage plant was working overtime against the Panthers. I value Evans more as a high end WR2 compared to Godwin’s WR1 value.

Antonio Brown – 7 catches for 69 yards. Nice. 16 months later AB finally found an acceptable helmet. I consider him more of a low end WR2, but with huge upside.

Rob Gronkowski – 2 catches for 51 yards and his 4th touchdown. And that’s four scores in the last 5 games. But I heard he was a blocking tight end.

Mike Davis – 7 carries for 32 yards, 4 catches for 12 yards. In the tease of the year, Christian McCaffrey (shoulder) returned for just one game. There’s a decent chance CMC is back next week, so if you own Davis but not McCaffrey then it’s worth shopping him to the McCaffrey owner while there’s still some uncertainty.

Robby Anderson – 4 catches for 21 yards. Mr. Anderson thought he took the blue pill but it was actually the red pill. 

D.J. Moore – 4 catches for 96 yards and his 4th touchdown. Last week I told DJ I wanted moore cowbell. He gave the Bucs all the cowbell they could handle while seeing a team high 7 targets. Hopefully this increased target share becomes consistent. Also, fingers crossed that Teddy Bridgewater‘s (18/24 for 136 yards, 3 carries for 16 yards, 2 passing touchdowns, 1 rushing touchdown and 1 interception) knee is alright.

 

DEN at LV

Melvin Gordon – 11 carries for 46 yards. Gordon? More like Gordoff! Woof!

Phillip Lindsay – 4 carries for 2 yards. The Tasmanian Devil played more like Wile E Coyote. The Broncos offense as a whole stunk. But only 4 carries for Lindsay?! C’mon!

Jerry Jeudy – 4 catches for 68 yards.  I told you Judge Jeudy would be tied up with voter fraud lawsuits the rest of the season, but he was able to escape the bench long enough to catch a few balls. If Drew Lock (23/47 for 257 yards, 2 carries for 7 yards, 1 passing touchdown and 4 interceptions) and the Broncos’ offense can avoid the glue factory, there’s still a chance for Jeudy to produce WR2 numbers rest of season.

Noah Fant – 3 catches for 18 yards. Noah jumped on his ark and vanished.

Josh Jacobs – 21 carries for 112 yards, 4 catches for 24 yards and his 7th and 8th touchdowns. I thought we might get another Jinglehammer game, but Devontae Booker (16 carries for 81 yards, 1 catch for 2 yards and his 2nd and 3rd touchdowns) had to get in on the action for a little revenge against his old team. Jacobs is just outside the group of elite RB1s, he’s still a really good RB1.

Darren Waller – 3 catches for 37 yards. Waller didn’t see his first target until midway thru the 2nd quarter which is a crime against football and punishable in 49 of 50 states. He also dropped a deep ball in the 2nd half which may have been a touchdown which I’m still crying abou&2xh*klf. Sorry my tears got on the keyboard.

 

LAC at MIA

Justin Herbert – 20/32 for 187 yards, 4 carries for 10 yards, 2 passing touchdowns, 1 rushing touchdown and 1 interception–he now has 19 passing touchdowns in his seven starts. Our quarterbacks guru Blair has ranked Herbert in the top five of his rest of season quarterback rankings since the end of October. Blair reminds me of Russell Crowe in A Beautiful Mind. Sure, he was all in on Zay Jones last year, but Crowe’s character was also schizophrenic so it makes sense.

Kalen Ballage – 18 carries for 68 yards, 5 catches for 34 yards. Interesting that the Chargers signed Ballage two weeks ago and he immediately jumped my guy Joshua Kelley (7 carries for 21 yards). Did I say interesting? I meant excruciating. To be fair, Ballage has looked like the better running back and with Justin Jackson (knee) now on the IR it seems like Ballage could have a role even after Ekeler is back.

Austin Ekeler – And good news for those of us suffering from Ekeler withdrawal:

 

Keenan Allen – 3 catches for 39 yards and his 5th touchdown. That’s makes three straight game that he’s found the endzone and four of the last five. I don’t think Allen is missing Tyrod Taylor. He remains a locked in WR1.

Mike Williams – 2 catches for 38 yards. Big Mike was wide open for a 4th quarter touchdown and Herbert flat out missed him which prompted me to yell obscenities at the television and my girlfriend to send me to sleep in the basement. Thanks a lot, Justin!

Hunter Henry – 4 catches for 30 yards and his 2nd touchdown. Here’s Henry’s receiving yardage each of the last six games: 30, 33, 33, 23, 23, 39. Well, at least he’s consistent!

DeVante Parker – 2 catches for 31 yards. I thought with Saucy Boi away Parker would play but it’s actually Jakeem Grant (4 catches for 43 yards and his 1st touchdown) who seems to be Tua Tagovailoa‘s (15/25 for 169 yards, 6 carries for -1 yard and his 4th and 5th passing touchdowns) favorite target. Grant is worth an add in deeper leagues after seeing 5 targets each of the last two weeks and I’m getting very excited about drafting Tua on all my 2021 teams.

Salvon Ahmed – 25 carries for 85 yards, 1 catch for 5 yards. Much like Ballage with the Jackson injury, Ahmed swooped in after the Myles Gaskin (knee) injury and leapt both Jordan Howard (inactive) and Matt Breida (hamstring) on the depth chart. The undrafted rookie free agent out of Washington looks quick and there’s a legitimate chance he takes the reins and runs with the lead job in Miami. It’ll be interesting to see how it plays out when Gaskin is back but add Ahmed now and worry about that later.

 

BUF at ARI

Kyler Murray – 22/32 for 245 yards, 11 carries for 61 yards, 1 passing touchdown, 2 rushing touchdowns and 1 interception–he now has 17 passing touchdowns and 10 rushing touchdowns. Dude is on pace for 18 rushing touchdowns. For reference, Cam Newton holds the single-season record for a QB with 14 rushing TDs, LJax only had 7 Rushing TDs last year and Mike Vick never had more than 9 in a season. So yeah, he’s pretty good, and I own him on almost all 200 of my fantasy teams.

DeAndre Hopkins – 7 catches for 127 yards and his 4th touchdown. Nuk had a nice game going, then he whipped his dong out on the table to catch a game winning 43 yard Hail Murray with two seconds left on the clock to make it a great game. He’s not quite in the same tier as Davante Adams but he’s the next best thing. 

Chase Edmonds – 8 carries for 56 yards, 3 catches for 21 yards. The Cardinals’ backfield is tricky because their best running back is at QB and has 10 rushing TDs. And now Kenyan Drake (16 carries for 100 yards, 1 catch for 9 yards) is back from his ankle injury to muddy the waters. I’m considering both Drake and Edmonds as upside RB2s rest of season, this is still a fast paced, high powered offense.

Josh Allen – 32/49 for 284 yards, 7 carries for 38 yards, 1 catch for 12 yards, 2 passing touchdowns, 1 receiving touchdown and 2 interceptions–he now has 21 passing touchdowns on the year. Taysom who? This guy can really do it all. Allen’s touchdown reception was a prettier catch than any Michael Thomas has had all season. Alright so maybe that’s not saying much but it really was a great grab and if the quarterbacking stuff doesn’t work out he might have a future as a tight end.

Stefon Diggs – 10 catches for 93 yards and his 4th touchdown. I’ve been victory lapping so hard after ranking Diggs higher than any other “expert” in the Fantasy Pros’ draft rankings competition that I hurt my back. Now I’m going to have to spend all my Kyler/Diggs fantasy winnings on a chiropractor. Easy come, easy go.

Cole Beasley – 11 catches for 109 yards and his 3rd touchdown. His targets are more erratic than my senile grandpa’s driving but when he gets the looks Beasley does produce. 

Zack Moss – 7 carries for 20 yards, 1 catch for -3 yards. Maybe trying to figure out whether Moss or Devin Singletary (4 carries for 15 yards, 1 catch for -5 yards) is the Bills back to own is a futile effort. Hint: it’s Moss.

 

SEA at LAR

Russell Wilson – 22/37 for 248 yards, 8 carries for 60 yards, no touchdowns and 2 interceptions. Russ decided to try his hand at preparing vegan meals this week. What a disaster. These guys need protein, Russ!

D.K. Metcalf – 2 catches for 28 yards. Just look at his muscles. Does this look like a guy who wants vegan cooking? Those muscles need meat!

Tyler Lockett – 5 catches for 66 yards. Lockett liked the oat milk at first but Russ gave him a team high 9 servings which is just too much oat milk for any one man. In all seriousness, Wilson, Metcalf and Lockett are all primed for a bounce back this Thursday against the Cardinals. Russ probably has a few filets ready.

Alex Collins – 11 carries for 43 yards, 1 catch for 4 yards and his 1st touchdown. I told you when Chris Carson (foot) first got injured that he could miss extended time since he was dealing with a Lisfranc sprain and we couldn’t trust how Petey Sunshine was downplaying it. Here we are almost a month after Carroll called Carson a “game time decision,” and still no Carson to be found. What I didn’t expect was the return of the Irish jigging Alex Collins to supplant DeeJay Dallas (2 carries for 8 yards, 2 catches for 23 yards) as that lead back with Carson still sidelined. Sneaky Pete indeed. Collins is worth a roster spot in case Carson can’t go Thursday.

Cooper Kupp – 5 catches for 50 yards. Cooper Kupp? More like Pooper Kupp! I’ve been talking about buying Kupp all year but this Rams’ passing attack is very frustrating. I really thought Kupp had turned a corner after his 11 catches in their last game. Robert Woods (5 catches for 33 yards) was kept under wraps as well, Josh Reynolds (8 catches for 94 yards) was the only Ram receiver you’d have been happy to start as he led the team with 10 targets. It’s hard to trust any of these guys right now.

Darrell Henderson – 7 carries for 28 yards, 1 catch for 5 yards and his 5th touchdown. The Rams’ backfield is shaping up to be as much of a headache as their receiving corps. Rookie Cam Akers (10 carries for 38 yards) led the group in carries but Hendy and Malcolm Brown (6 carries for 33 yards, 2 catches for 18 yards and his 4th and 5th touchdowns) are still a big part of the program and got most of the red zone work. If I’m ranking them today the order is Henderson, Akers, Brown but that could change quickly.

 

SF at NO

Jerick McKinnon – 18 carries for 33 yards, 1 catch for 13 yards. This may have been McKinnon’s last hurrah with Raheem Mostert (ankle) likely back next week. Is it even a last hurrah if it sucks? McKinnon will still be worth a roster spot in 12 teamers.

Brandon Aiyuk – 7 catches for 75 yards and his 5th touchdown. I may have underestimated Aiyuk in my rookie rankings this year, but I also didn’t expect Deebo Samuel (hamstring) and George Kittle (foot) to both be out most of the year.

Drew Brees – 8/13 for 76 yards and 1 touchdown before departing at half time with a rib injury. Jameis Winston (6/10 for 63 yards) came on in relief to eat the W and should obviously be snatched up in superflex leagues until we know more about Brees.

Alvin Kamara – 8 carries for 15 yards, 7 catches for 83 yards and his 9th, 10th and 11th touchdown. Some weeks the Chipmunk puts up the yardage and other weeks he puts up the touchdowns. But it’s the weeks where he lights up the board with both that makes him this year’s top fantasy running back.

Michael Thomas – 2 catches for 27 yards. When Zero RB goes wrong. 

 

CIN at PIT

Joe Burrow – 21/40 for 213 yards and 1 touchdown–he now has 12 touchdowns on the year. This was another one of those gusty games. On top of that the rook had to deal with one of the best defenses in the league. Let’s cut Joe Donkey a little slack after three straight big games.

Gio Bernard – 8 carries for 30 yards, 4 catches for 17 yards. Gio was outproduced by the mustacheless Samaje Perine (7 carries for 48 yards, 1 catch for 7 yards) this week, which I didn’t  see coming. But I say it every week: the Steelers defense is not one you want to start running backs against. Joe Mixon (foot) is questionable at best for week 11 so don’t drop that beautiful stache just yet.

Tyler Boyd – 6 catches for 41 yards. After back to back touchdown games Boyd took a little breather. But at least he’s still breathing, unlike A.J. Green (0 catches on 5 targets).

Tee Higgins – 7 catches for 115 yards and his 4th touchdown. This game featured two exciting rookie receivers in Higgins and  Chase Claypool (4 catches for 56 yards and his 6th and 7th touchdowns) and the kids didn’t disappoint. We all thought last years WR class was amazing with Metcalf, Brown and McLauren–and it was–but in two seasons I expect the 2021 class will be the better of the two. 

James Conner – 13 carries for 36 yards, 2 catches for 12 yards. This is back to back stinkers for Conner and three straight games with less than 50 rushing yards. Not exactly the kind of consistency you want from your RB1.

Diontae Johnson – 6 catches for 116 yards and his 4th touchdown. I like Claypool more than Diontae long term, but rest of season Johnson is the Steeler receiver I want if I have to pick one.

Juju Smith-Schuster – 9 catches for 77 yards and his 5th touchdown. I guess Ben Roethlisberger (27/46 for 333 yards and 4 touchdowns) doesn’t mind not practicing all week nor the crazy winds. He was dishing out TDs like Grimace giving out Happy Meals. JuJu is still the clear #3 in Pittsburgh if you ask me. 

 

BAL at NE

Cam Newton – 13/17 for 118 yards, 11 carries for 21 yards, 1 passing touchdown and 1 rushing touchdown–he now has 3 passing touchdowns and 9 rushing touchdowns on the year. That’s not a typo, three passing touchdowns in eight games. THREE. And he’s still producing useful fantasy numbers thanks to all the rushing TDs. 

Jakobi Meyers – 5 catches for 59 yards, 1/1 passing with 24 passing yards and his 1st passing touchdown. His touchdown pass to Rex Burkhead (6 carries for 31 yards, 4 catches for 35 yards and his 5th and 6th touchdowns) was prettier than any ball Cam has throw all season. 

Damien Harris – 22 carries for 121 yards. The star of Sunday night was hands down Harris. The the second year back ran circles around a tough Ravens run defense. Sony Michel‘s (quad) best chance of getting the lead role back is by starting a Madden franchise on Playstation 5.  

Lamar Jackson – 24/34 for 249 yards, 11 carries for 55 yards, 2 passing touchdowns and 1 interceptions–he now has 14 passing touchdowns on the season. Not a bad game considering the monsoon up in New England Sunday night. Remember LJax has to complete his gauntlet run with the Titans and Steelers the next two weeks but then the schedule softens up for your championship run.

J.K. Dobbins – 5 carries for 13 yards, 1 catch for 1 yard. At least Mark Ingram (5 carries for 5 yards, 2 catches for 24 yards) and Gus Edwards (7 carries for 42 yards, 1 catch for 31 yards) didn’t do much either. I can confirm, misery really does love company as long as they bring snacks. Please bring pizza rolls.

Willie Snead – 5 catches for 64 yards and his 2nd and 3rd touchdowns. Willie reminds me of the villain from a movie. I’m not sure which movie. Maybe one of the bad guys from Ghost. Too bad the Patriots defense didn’t have a Swayze to cover Willie. Anyway, don’t worry about adding Snead unless your league is really deep.

Marquise Brown – 2 catches for 14 yards. Hollywood? More like Dollywood, amiright? I drove by Dollywood last summer on my way thru Pigeon Forge and that place looked like my worst nightmare. Kind of like owing Marquise Brown.

Mark Andrews – 7 catches for 61 yards. This was a step in the right direction for Mandrews who had totaled just 8 catches for 75 yards with no touchdowns over the previous three games. Now if we could just get some more of those sweet two TD games we’ve come to expect from the Ravens’ big man.