As my Kerryon Johnson fathead and I prepared for our first Zoomsgiving on Thursday morning, I could feel the Excitement growing. Yes, I’ve named my dong “Excitement.” So I fired up AOL dialup connection to join the Razz-family Zoom call. Nothing could have prepared me for what I’d see on the other side of the screen once my 17 minute dial up was complete. The things Rudy Gamble, Pigskinonator and their Will Fuller fathead were doing would make Louis C.K. blush. A couple hours later ,Will Fuller came through again with a monstrous game against the Lions, catching 6 passes for 171 yards and his 7th and 8th touchdowns. The great Pigskinonator foreshadowed all of this, of course, projecting Fuller as its #3 fantasy wide receiver for week 12 and projecting Deshaun Watson (17/25 for 318 yards, 8 carries for 24 yards and 4 touchdowns–he now has 24 touchdowns) as its #2 QB for the week. If you haven’t tasted the deliciousness of the Pig-bot yet, we’re still offering a free 3-day trial and then it’s only $5.99 for the final month of the season. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday for fantasy football:
Duke Johnson – 9 carries for 37 yards, 3 catches for 43 yards and his 2nd touchdown. I questioned my own sanity as I thrust Johnson up to #18 in my week 12 rankings after he burnt me the past two weeks. But Pigskinonator scoffed at what I thought was an aggressive ranking, as the bot boosted Johnson all the way up to #11 in its week 12 rankings. It was an entertaining rollercoaster ride with Duke, but I’ll be happy to have the grithier Johnson, David Johnson, back from his concussion next week–hopefully.
C.J. Prosise – 5 carries for 12 yards, 1 catch for 2 yards and his 1st touchdown. The Thanksgiving vultures were circling. I’m eating vulture instead of turkey next year!
Brandin Cooks – 5 catches for 85 yards. We praise the brilliant Pig-bot when it’s boldness pays off but I’ll be real with you, it isn’t always bacon and ribs. The robot projected Cooks as it’s #4 fantasy wide receiver this week, which he’ll fall well short of. That said, five catches and 85 yards isn’t going to ruin your Thanksgiving unlike Uncle Arlo.
Matthew Stafford – 28/42 yards for 295 yards, 1 touchdown and 1 interception–he now has 18 passing touchdowns on the year. The Staff Infection flared up again on Turkey Day. Getting Kenny Golladay (hip) back from holiday will help.
Adrian Peterson – 15 carries for 55 yards and his 3rd and 4th touchdowns. A.T.D. All Thanksgiving Day. Patricia doesn’t care if Kerryon Johnson (11 carries for 46 yards, 4 catches for 52 yards) looks like the far superior runner. Not that we should be surprised by that at this point. This is why I’m still hesitant to jump on board the D’Andre Swift bandwagon whenever he returns from his concussion.
Marvin Jones Jr. – 6 catches for 48 yards. The Martian has crashed back down to earth the past two weeks after a string of three big games. On the plus side, Marv did see 12 targets agains the Texans but will end if Golladay is back next week. He also appeared to suffer a left leg injury on their last play of the game so keep an eye on the injury report this week.
Mohamed Sanu Sr. – 4 catches for 32 yards and his 1st touchdown. The Prophet rose from the dead in the second half.
T.J. Hockenson – 5 catches for 89 yards. Hock continues to solidify himself as a stalwart in the group of tight ends behind the two solo tiers of Kelce and Waller. That reminds me of when Jake Ciely of The Athletic joined me back in August to discuss why he loved Hockenson:
Antonio Gibson – 20 carries for 115 yards, 5 catches for 21 yards and his 9th, 10th and 11th touchdown. Remember all those “experts” fading the Gibson hype back in the preseason because he only handled 33 carries in his college career?
Terry McLaurin – 7 catches for 92 yards. Over the last 6 games he’s averaged 9 targets, 7 receptions and 92 receiving yards. Terrence of Scarabia is a locked in WR1–Rudy and Pigskinonator told us that back in July.
Logan Thomas – 4 catches for 20 yards, 1/1 passing for 28 yards and his 4th receiving touchdown. His 28 yard completion to McLaurin was a beauty and he played college QB which was news to me. I’m intrigued. Could he be a better option than Alex Smith (19/26 for 149 yards, 1 touchdown and 1 interception)? It would certainly be more fun to watch. At tight end Thomas’s targets are consistently in the 4 to 6 range which lumps him into the back end TE1 conversation. It’s a messy conversation, very difficult to follow.
Ezekiel Elliott – 10 carries for 32 yards, 1 catch for 7 yards. I said last week that the buy-low window, which looked a lot like a wall with rusty spikes coming out of it, was closed. Turns out it actually was a rusty-spiked-wall. To be fair to the Cowboys offense, they did lose both of their starting offensive tackles on the first drive which is a big blow. Speaking of big blow, check out Andy Dalton (25/35 for 215 yards, 3 carries for 17 yards, 1 touchdown and 1 interception)
Amari Cooper – 6 catches for 112 yards and his 3rd touchdown. At least one Cowboy decided to play football against the, uh, Football Team.
CeeDee Lamb – 5 catches for 21 yards. The Little Lamb dropped a touchdown which caused me to throw my Turducken at the TV screen. This caused my Kerryon fathead to storm out of the house, leaving me to celebrate Thanksgiving all by my lonesome. So thanks a lot, CeeDee!
Lamar Jackson – LJax tested positive for COVID-19 and will not play on Sunday (if there’s even a game at all), Happy Thanksgiving!