Soooo, yeah, I got bored. What can I say? Even with such an illustrious life of binge drinking and hanging out with your mom, there are empty spaces to fill. And I give you something that came out of one of those spaces. The thought process here is, (and be careful, you’ll be entering my thoughts, so duck if you see heavy amounts of boobage, or, you know, do your best motorboat impersonation):

“Well, you know what I would really like? Besides a fudgesicle? Actually, that’s all I’d really like. Wait, then I can’t explain my chart. Well… okay, but this is the last favor I’m doing for you. (What, this is how my brain works… kinda makes you wonder why you are even here, right?) So… what I’d like right now, besides fudge in my mouth, is a sort of reference thingamajig and tells me where all my picks will land if I’m picking, let’s say, 5th in a 12-team draft. Where are the rest of my picks? WHERE I ASK YOU! Look at all this internal strife. FUUUUDGE.”

So, you see all that? I needed something to tell me where my picks are, because I react to math like I do canned asparagus. This is a bad thing for all you canned asparagus lovers out there. All three of you. So, here’s a nifty chart-thang that won’t necessarily help you navigate international waters, but might come in handy during your drafts…

Gentlemen and four Ladies,

I know what you’re all thinking, “Who is this man-child showing off his above-average arsenal of hair products? Is this Grey from the past?” Now that’s humorous, and I’m not talking about my arm bone. That’d be humerus! Why would I write about that in the Football section of Razzball? I wouldn’t. Grey wrote about that on WebMD though, so you never know! I digress.

I’m here to introduce the 2014 Razzball Fantasy Football War Room. Get excited! I’ll preface my explanation with an apology for not getting this to the readers sooner. The Fantasy Football War Room was inspired by the one-and-only Fantasy Baseball War Room. It’s a great tool that I’ve used over the last few years to dominate my drafts. While developing my personal draft spreadsheet for football, I realized I could easily format it for use by the masses. There are features I hope to add in the future, but for the sake of time, I wanted to release the War Room while there was still an opportunity for Razzballers to use it!

So, let’s get down to brass tacks. Here is a brief rundown of what you’re getting in the 2014 Razzball Fantasy Football War Room: