Before the musician Sting spent his free-time digging Bart Simpson out of a well and having tantric Tex Mex — which from what I understand is when you start eating at a buffet and they don’t give you a time limit — he wrote a little ditty called Fields of Gold. Ostensibly it was a song of maturation and memory, but I prefer an alternate history: he was preparing the theme song for Justin Fields. Imagine sampling Fields of Gold like P.Diddy did Every Breath You Take, and then letting Donkey Teeth rap over that while you watch Justin Fields highlights. Now that’s a Monday Night! Let’s see what happened on Monday Night Football: 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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One of my favorite movie theater experiences came during my freshman year in college at my local art house cinema. I had never seen a David Lynch film before but heard good things about him. All I really knew is he made Twin Peaks, a tv show with the most nightmare inducing theme song. In hindsight, maybe Mulholland Dr. was not the best foray into his catalog. While it is now one of my favorite films, I left the theater confused and doubting my own intelligence. I went back the next night and it started to become clearer. It was the first movie where the audience stayed around after and discussed “what it all meant.” Sometimes NFL weeks can feel a mess and make absolutely no sense. They hit you like a ton of bricks and require more than the usual analysis. This past week felt like one of those weeks, but through the madness and riddles, a few bright lights shone through all the way to the waiver wire.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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*This Buy, Sell, Hold video was released by Anime Donkey prior to week 9 action but his recommendations still apply for week 10*

Week 9 was a busy news week in the NFL between the fatal car crash and all the vaccination/immunization drama. Too serious for me. Can’t we just go back to the Antonio Brown drama days? I mean the helmet and frozen foot drama days, before the rape accusation stuff. Boy, the NFL could really use some positive publicity. Or at least some more negative publicity that I can make jokes about! Know what else isn’t a joking matter? Buying Mike Williams! It’s gone under the news radar between all the other NFL injuries, the Gruden email scandal, Vaccine-gate, Ruggs’ downfall, etc.—but Williams has been nursing a sore knee for the past three games. Coincidentally, he’s had a total of only 6 receptions for 104 yards and no touchdowns during that stretch. When I click on the little news sticky note next to Big Mike’s name over on Yahoo? No mention of any knee issues. Rotoworld? No news updates since October 17th when “Williams did not practice this week but is going to push through the knee injury anyway.” I don’t think this is a coincidence. Williams has disappointed ever since the knee injury, and yet his fantasy owner may have no idea of the correlation due to the reporting gap. When healthy, he’s proven his elite WR1 upside with Herbert; see if you can steal him away at a bargain price. Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy football:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Friends, it’s OK to cry. A lot of us are broken after this week, and — let’s be fair — our fantasy football therapists are going to get a lot of work. Here’s a quick primer of things to say: “I should have started Colt McCoy,” or, “LeVeon Bell daggered my team,” or, “The Jags out-field-goaled the Bills.” I mean, these are the weeks that enrich those contrarian players and line their pockets with enough gold for a season. Let’s check in on the scores and stats that wrecked us in week 9 of fantasy football: 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Sunday morning has arrived and you spent all weekend on a drinking binge? Or worse (maybe better?), you’ve been up for 48 hours on six different types of drugs? Fear not, Razzball has all of your last-minute fantasy football needs covered. Over the past two days, Bobby has covered the best defensive matchups this week for both Wide Outs and Slot Receivers. Yesterday Skorish went through every fantasy-relevant injury to keep an eye on in his weekly Fantasy Football Injury Report. Down below I’ll give you some sneaky start options who might be available in your free agent pool if you’re in a bind, as well as my recently updated week 9 rankings for half PPR leagues. Feel free to ask me questions in the comments if you think the rankings don’t address your specific circumstances. And please, please, please consider purchasing our 2021 fantasy football tools subscription. As intelligent and handsome as we all agree I am, my rankings are still packed full of bias and human error. Rudy’s computer model minimizes the human inputs and leans heavily on raw, untainted data inputs to provide a very valuable, differing viewpoint. Plus you receive all kinds of other benefits with your subscription including next-day snap count and target rate data. Anyway, here’s a few sneaky starts for week 9 of the 2021 fantasy football season:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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The goal of this article is to find WRs to fade and buy based on how many fantasy points their opponent allows in the slot vs. out wide. In today’s article we will review the key out wide matchups for week 9. To keep up with the latest defensive trends we updated the analysis to only include the last 5 weeks.

The below chart breaks down where each team allows their fantasy points to WRs and is listed from the most to the least amount of fantasy points allowed out wide over the past 5 weeks.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The games of Week 9 are upon us, people! In fact, considering I’m writing this on Friday, Week 9 has already begun with what turned into a real barn burner between the Jets and Colts. And as an Elijah Moore owner, I for one welcome our new Thursday Night Football offensive explosion overlords. Let’s dive in to the state of the RazzBowl as of the games of Week 8, so not including my awesome Elijah Moore / Ty Johnson performances!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

As Axl Rose once said:

And when your fears subside

And shadows still remain, oh yeah

I know that you can love me when there’s no one left to blame

So never mind the darkness, we still can find a way

‘Cause nothin’ lasts forever, even cold November rain

We’re in the darkness right now as a football community. Confusion, injuries, controversy, and most strikingly, tragedy. We’re surrounded by it right now and this is already generally a tough spot in “normal” football seasons but it seems obvious this is anything but normal. This has been a real tough one with some big highs and some of the lowest lows in a long time. 

And it’s my job to help guide you, as a fantasy football player, through these lows to succeed at this game we all love. Is the senseless death of a young woman something I want to cover in what should be an entertaining run-over of your roster options for Sunday football? No, of course not but the dice have unfortunately been cast and this is how they’ve fallen and I’d be remiss to ignore the 2000 lb elephant in the room. I’m going to go from here on without some of the sentimentality and just talk football because frankly, as callous as it sounds, that’s what you’re here for and that’s what I get paid patented Razzball Fun Bucks™ (Redeemable at participating Razzball locations) to do. And who really wants to hear me pondering on these deep ethical and moral questions this week have brought about? I spent most of last week’s article talking about the Monster Mash for crying out loud. 

With that being said, let’s jump into it.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I apologize for the break in my articles, things got a bit much. I don’t like to get into the messy details of my personal life, but I also like contradicting myself, so, here’s my transaction list for the month of October:

October 3rd – Did not practice, labeled as Probable

October 5th – Did  not practice, downgraded to Questionable

October 8th – Scratched before game time due to “personal matters”

October 11th – Ran the field, upgraded to Questionable

October 12th – Coach says I had the best practice of the season, upgraded to Probable

October 13th – Placed on the PUP list until early November

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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The goal of this article is to find wide receivers to fade and buy based on how many fantasy points their opponent allows in the slot vs. out wide. In today’s article we will review the key slot matchups for week 9. To stay hip and keep up with the latest trends we updated the analysis to only include the last 5 weeks.

The below chart breaks down where each team allows their fantasy points to wide receivers and is listed from the most to the least amount of fantasy points allowed to the slot this season.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

You would think with 75 total points scored this was an exciting Thursday Night Football game, but it was not. The final score made the game look competitive, but this was all Colts all night. The Indianapolis running game ran wild against the Jets and, playing most of the game with a third string quarterback, there wasn’t much they could do to have any hope in this one. Coming off a heartbreaking overtime loss last week, the Colts used a visit from New York to get back on track and get their groove back with a 45-30 victory.

Please, blog, may I have some more?