Now that week 1 is in the books, we can start to relax. There were many surprise performances and many disappointing performances in week 1. If you still have uncertainty at certain positions, you have come to the right place. I’m going to dissect this weeks matchups and give you the best streamers for week 2.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Is there a better time to be a sports fan? Everyone rooting for the Astros to beat the Dodgers in the World Series, everyone overreacting to every NBA game, fantasy football owners starting to turn their attention to playoff season, the NHL still existing.
Up here in the northeast the leaves are starting to fall just like your fantasy playoff chances if you don’t use Razzball to get you over the hump. If you’ve got league-specific questions — post them below and I will get to them Saturday afternoon/evening.Please, blog, may I have some more?
A pretty crowded afternoon slate today, highlighted by the Jaguars vs. Chargers game. Haha, just kidding. Also, not sure how I would type out a crying noise. Or the sound my fetal position makes. Honestly, it’s pretty much the Seahawks vs. Rams and Colts vs. Broncos show, but I’m let the deciding factor be the fact that Troy Aikman and Joe Buck are the crew for just one of those games. So Colts-Broncos game, here we go! Oh, what’s that? Jim Nantz and Phil Simms are handling that one? Oh, okay. Well then. Excuse me for a second. That being said, the Rams always seem to play their division rival Seahawks pretty close, handing them a some surprising upset wins the past few years. Surprising, as one team represents all the things you want out of a continually elite franchise with excellent results, and the other representing mediocrity and disappointingly low expectations year after year and a consistent and frustrating basis. Sure, you can be a person that loves rooting for the underdog, but when the underdog doesn’t even care all that much… and then we have the modernly “historic” (all the oxymoron points) game between the Colts and Broncos, a matchup that hasn’t featured Peyton Manning as either quarterback since 1993. So thanks for making me feel old!Please, blog, may I have some more?
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Sorry, drinking has already started because today is the day. Today is the day football starts! Yeah, I know that you know, but I wanted you to know that I know because I now know that you know. And that’s when my computer exploded. Regardless, not only does the debut of football bring us, you know, football, I also get to debut my beloved Live Game Day Threads. A place where we can hang out, enjoy some memes, discuss the games in front of us, and hopefully learn something. Like in this case, what a Siemian is and what it can do. To be honest, I could tell you better what it could do if one of those vowels were dropped. Like, any of them. But yes, if the GIF above or the just stated close-but-not-so-close sexual innuendo didn’t give it away (or even the title!), our first game of the year features two teams that have a long and storied rivalry dating back to… uh, well, one game. But, to be fair, that game was the Super Bowl (50, or as the Romans would say “L”), a game in which the Broncos defense carried Peyton Manning to another title so he could retire knowing he had one more ring than Tavaris Jackson. It’s important to have goals folks. And while I’m amazed that the NFC South was able to produce a team that actually knew what it was doing last year, an entire offseason has passed since these two franchises met. Will there be a different outcome? Well, unless they’ve figure out how to stop Von Miller, I doubt it… but to be fair, if I still have a Cam Newton combined with the return of Kelvin Benjamin led by the distinguished gentleman known as Riverboat Ro, alln going against a quarterback I hadn’t heard about until a week ago, I’d say your chances to win are preeeetty gooood. Sorry, I’m at the elongated vowels stage of alcohol poisoning…
Our Week 1 Rankings can be found here!Please, blog, may I have some more?
In what is an interesting match-up, if only because we rarely get to see it (I’VE NEVER EVEN HEARD OF IT), the Broncos travel to Detroit to find out if last week’s fourth quarter “Manning being just being Manning” is actually repeatable. Much has been said of Denver’s lack of any rushing attack, mainly because of C.J. Anderson’s toe. Which seems ridiculous. I mean, you want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are ways, Dude. I can get you a toe by three o’clock this afternoon… There are some reports that Ronnie Hillman could start splitting carries, but I’m assuming the Broncos prefer positive rushing yardage, so I’m still in the Anderson camp, health and s’mores permitting. The Lions have started 0-2, I think mainly because Matt Stafford forgot that he has a thing called Calvin Johnson on his team. A stifling (I’m running out of adjectives) Broncos defense will continue to make that relationship tense (I’m running out of metaphors), but both offenses are capable of putting up yards. I for one hope this is the most amazing game in the history of games, only because with Drew Brees looking doubtful in Week 4, we’ll have a Sunday Night Football game that features Luke McCown and Brandon Weeden coming up. Jesus.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Except for 2010, the Chargers or Broncos have won the AFC West every year since 2004, and the other team finished second in seven of those years. Mainly because the Raiders are gonna Raider. The series, as a whole, has been quite the see-saw battle over the decades, starting back to their shared AFL days, all the way to the aforementioned 2004 season. You see, that’s when Philip Rivers came. Which would be the start of seven straight children. Get it? Also there were those nine victories in his first 11 starts against the AFC rival. However, the now Peyton Manning led Broncos have won five of the past six games, and he’s coming off a game where he threw his record-breaking 509th touchdown. While the Chargers defense is missing several key play-makers, most notably in the linebacker corps, and the defensive line, and the secondary, so pretty much everywhere, it remains to be seen if they can limit Manning to double-digit touchdowns. That being said, the Broncos were heavily favored in last year’s Thursday night game and managed to let Rivers and the Chargers offense drive the football in 25 minute increments, most likely a key recipe for tonight not to be a blow out. Just like how my recipe for tonight will be profound alcohol consumption and crying. Whether they are tears of happiness or tears of sadness, well, like always, that’s up to what kind of porn I watch after the game…Please, blog, may I have some more?
If I could describe this game in two words, they would be: Brett Favre. Or, as some pronounce it: Brett Fahhhhhhrvve. And if I could describe this game with more than two words, it would just be Brett Favre typed out a bunch of times. You should actually thank me, as I’m preparing you mentally for what will be a barrage of Peyton Manning/Brett Favre comparisons, graphics, anecdotes, and overall jaw stretching for those two quarterbacks during Sunday Night Football. If you were buried under a rock all weekend (which, if you were, maybe stay there?), you should know that Peyton Manning is just two touchdown passes away from matching the aforementioned Brett Favre for the NFL record. In what should be a pretty entertaining game, two of the winningest (is that a word?) teams since 2012 will face off, only be to overshadowed by a retired player who sends d*ck pics to ask women out. Why not just stick to trying to sell them your jeans? The 49ers have surprisingly and quietly won three straight after starting the season exactly how Seattle appears to be ending it, including a season-high 432 offensive yards against the Rams. Then again, it was against the Rams… who actually beat Seattle earlier today, so really, I have no idea what to think of the NFC West anymore. It’s weird.Please, blog, may I have some more?
So I’m going to mostly predict that Peyton will recover enough to be at least partly Peyton again. There is risk involved here but I just don’t see him starting the season still hurt. I truly have no idea how sound his body will be but he’s still Peyton Manning. The good news is that […]Please, blog, may I have some more?
Below you will see that I have written down my thoughts in regard to the free agency moves and their fantasy impacts. They are so interesting that I had to take a sedative to keep from having a heart attack. Peyton Manning: The three most likely candidates seem to now be the 49ers, Titans and […]Please, blog, may I have some more?
Good day Razzballers! Only three games left until the long cold off season. Don’t cry Doc. Don’t you do it! Ok, let’s do this thing. I like both these matchups quite a bit and even though I’ve been wrong on my predictions this postseason each game has gone about as I expected. The only one […]Please, blog, may I have some more?