Week 1 is in the books, we are on the heel of the Thursday Night Football Bengals-Ravens game and I couldn’t be more happy. Is there any better time of the year? Before I clicked submit on this piece, we received a beautiful clip of Joe Mixon jogging in to the locker room early in the first quarter with a right knee injury. This will be the freshest handcuff report out on the inter-web. Mixon owners please pick up Giovani Bernard, he is looking fresh out there!

I will not go down a rabbit hole of why you should roster your RB handcuff because I know you are here to scroll straight to the names, that is what I am here to give you. Read my pre-season handcuff article if you are curious. I’ll sum it up for you, SCHEME!

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Well the top guys of a week ago did not live up to their hype, did they?  Here are their stats from Week 2:

Javorius Allen – 5 Rec, 35 yards, 66 rush yards, 1 TD.

Kerwynn Williams – 22 rush yards.

Kenny Golladay – 1 Rec, 8 yards.

Tarik Cohen – 8 Rec, 55 yds, 13 rush yards, 1 fumble lost.

Nelson Agholor – 1 Rec, 9 yards, 1 TD.

Williams was quiet this week as the Cardinals looked bad against Indy and Chris Johnson definitely took carries. The whole Cardinals offense still doesn’t look right; let’s hope they get back on track Week 3 but Johnson & Ellington were on the field in overtime and that worries me. On the bright side: Williams is also their return man to add to his value. Don’t cut bait after one week…

Allen looked good on his TD run and is settling in as Woodhead light, which is a hoppy sardines-infused dark chocolate almond butter IPA with less calories. Flacco likes to throw so Allen should remain a flex play, although West is still the bellcow there.

Cohen could have looked better, but Howard was also terrible and the Bears simply got owned, so that Cohen salvaged some fantasy value is good to see. Cohen clearly benefits from being on the field for all the passing the Bears will do. So hold him if you added him last week because better days are coming.

Agholor salvaged some value catching a garbage time TD (though based on that score the Eagles actually had a chance to win (on a Hail Mary), so was it really in garbage time?)

Razzball Football’s partner FantasyDraft is starting a new sign-up promotion this week, all new depositing signups receive a free $4 “Everyone Wins” NFL GPP ticket for the upcoming Sunday slate along with offering all players 4% cash back on their initial deposits! 

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The first couple weeks are where you should spend at least fifty percent of your Free Agent Auction Budget. Yeah, I said Half. At least. Spend that money. These early weeks are mas importante. Don’t worry about dropping the money on the top guys because isn’t it better to have them and drop them than not have a possible lottery ticket? But it does seem a bit weird. We’re not taught to spend all our money right away. We’re supposed to save some for a rainy day. You can, but experience has shown me that the most valuable guys come after the first couple weeks and very often after week one. You don’t need money once the season is over (and if you don’t get one of these guys your seasons may be over a lot sooner than you think), so don’t worry about spending it now.

If you want an FAAB lesson check out the preseason column is here. Now let’s get to the good stuff.  You know these guys because everyone can’t stop talking about them. Here are the top waiver adds and what should you pay (assuming $100 FAAB Budget):

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Welcome back to this week’s “Depp Impact”, where we analyze famous Johnny Depp cameos and how they affected the films he appeared in. Let’s start with 21 Jump Street, a surprisingly funny romp in which Depp, wearing more prosthetics than an amputee convention, joined Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum… *answers call from Jay* I’ve been informed that this will instead be another Deep Impact, our weekly look at those options deep league players should be targeting. We’re entering the stretch run for drafting, so let’s take another look at some players you should be looking to scoop up in the last rounds before Week 1.

Hey speaking of drafts, there are still some spots left in our RCLs! Get in there quick before it fills up, so you can all compete for second place to yours truly. Now that the shameless plug is out of the way, let’s get to some names. Keeping with last week’s format, we’ll look at guys currently going after pick 180. If you’re only playing 10- or 12-team leagues, these players are at best people you should keep an eye out on. I caught flak in some corners of the internet last week for mentioning Jay Cutler’s name because mouthbreathers struggle with reading comprehension, and didn’t understand that if you’re late in the draft of a deep league, there is at least one glaring flaw causing these guys to be available…

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Peak Lions.

Peak Lions.

I usually dedicate this space for what is the marquee match-up of the time slot. True, I dictate those decisions, so there’s a measure of bias, to be sure. Which is why you should feel lucky that the Chargers aren’t playing until this afternoon, but looking at the schedule for all the early games today, there is something strikingly lacking. And that’s a marquee game, as you might have sensed, there are none. But more than that, there are literally no compelling games whatsoever, probably a first since, well, whenever the last Browns and Buccaneers were playing against each other. Washington versus the Jets? Meh. Cardinals against a Benless Steelers? Eh. Chiefs without Charles visiting the Vikings? Eeesh. Texans against the Jaguars? Holy sh*t. So let’s just focus on what is probably the worst game of the week, and that’s the race to the bottom of the NFC North by the Bears and the 0-5 Lions. Haha, just kidding. Like anybody wants to hear about that…

Rankings have been updated for today’s games and can be found here.

Join myself and your peers in a special Razzball-only Contest! Buy-in is just $5.00 and the top-12 finishers in a 55-team league are all part of the prize pool! Sign up here!

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